I froze.


    I hadn’t thought about that.


    Probably not. I mean, I haven’t kissed many people. Even with Jace, who I crushed on for ages, I


    only ever stole kisses when he was sick, half–asleep, or passed out drunk. And even then, it was


    just on his cheek or the back of his hand.


    But earlier with Hayden… our lips actually touched. That wasn’t something Jace and I did much.


    Jace used to kiss me on the cheek or forehead all the time, but a real kiss? Lips meeting, like really


    kissing? There was only one time.


    I remember him saying, “Rea, we’re too close. I just can’t do it.”


    The truth–was, he just didn’t love me enough. Someone once told me that when two people kiss,


    and it’s real–like lips and tongues tangling–it’s all dopamine. It’s supposed to be uncontroble.


    If you can control it, well, that means you’re just not that into them.


    “I don’t like hypotheticals,” I finally said to Hayden.


    His jaw tightened, and I watched his Adam’s apple move as he swallowed. “But I want to know.”


    The intensity in his eyes was so strong, I could barely breathe under the weight of it.


    I let out a sarcasticugh. “Why’s it such a big deal? First time a girl’s kissed you?”


    “Yes.”


    That one word hit me like a p, and my smile totally froze.


    A secondter, I heard myself say something awful, like aplete jerk: “Well, I’ll make it up to


    you.” “How?” Hayden asked, almost instantly.


    I was supposed to be the one in control, but suddenly it felt like I was the one being yed.


    I knew exactly what kind of “make it up” he meant.


    I pressed my lips together, made a decision. If I wanted to shut this down, stop whatever hopes he


    had, there was only one way.


    “Hayden, we agreed this was all fake. Even the kissing. If you’re gonna start catching feelings, I’ll


    have to find someone else.”


    “nning to switch boyfriends every day?” His voice was cold.


    This belongs to N?velDrama.Org: ?.


    1 gave a small, heartless smile. “It’s not what I want, but if you can’t handle it, then what choice do I


    have?” Hayden didn’t say a word. I could feel this chill rolling off him, like he was trying to freeze me


    out.


    But I pushed on, twisting the knife a little more. “I get it you’re all… pure. And yeah, asking you to


    fake this -holding hands, kissing–you’re right, I’ve been using you. So let’s end this whole fake thing


    right now.”


    I gave him a shove and pushed open the car door.


    He didn’t move. I rolled down the window, giving him onest look. “Not gonna leave?”


    Nothing.


    I was about to say more, but bit it back. Instead, I rolled up the window and mmed on the gas.


    As the car sped off, I nced in the rearview mirror. Hayden was still there, standing alone in the


    dark. He looked… abandoned, like the world had just dropped him.


    For a second, guilt hit me hard.


    I wasn’t sure if he’d go back to his ce across from mine, but I couldn’t face going home right


    now.


    I tried calling Lena again–still no answer.


    She was probably stuck in surgery again.


    With nowhere else to go, I headed back.


    When I pulled up to my ce, I nced up at Hayden’s window before getting out of the car.


    It was pitch ck, which meant he wasn’t back yet.


    I didn’t know where he’d gone, but I exhaled a shaky breath and stepped out of the car.


    I made my way upstairs, but the second I hit my floor, I froze.


    Someone was standing there, in the dark hallway.


    shes of Pete following mest time raced through my head.


    My body went into survival mode. Without thinking, I turned and bolted.