In the dead of night, there was silence around, only the calls of unknown insects came from the grass.


    I lit a cigarette, took a deep breath, quietly tasted the taste of nicotine, silently looked at the lonely and silent stars in the night sky.


    I suddenly think of her in my heart. I think of her in the far north thousands of miles away.


    Now, what is she doing? Is she waiting for the guest in the air in front of the computer under the solitary light? Knowing that countless times of waiting is futile, but still waiting there with desperate expectations


    All of a sudden, I thought, in fact, she is not waiting for another guest. She is suffering from her helpless, empty and tamed heart.


    I closed my eyes and made my brain blank and numb.


    In the dark, I also heard the voice of Buddha from outside the sky: there are three sufferings in life: one is that you can''t get it, so you suffer; the other is that you get it, but it''s just so, so you suffer; the third is that you give up, but later you find that it''s very important in your life, so you suffer


    I''m at a loss. I don''t understand.


    Buddha went on to say: what everyone sees and meets has been arranged for a long time. Everything is fate. The origin, the end, the reunion, the end, everything is God''s will.


    I said: since everything is God''s will, what''s the meaning of my life? Any effort is in vain, God arranged everything.


    Buddha compassionately extended his hand to all living beings. His voice has a kind of simple and honest voice: you come, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you.


    The voice of the Buddha gradually disappeared, my psychedelic continued to move forward, my heart up and down, tangled with confusion and desolation.


    I inadvertently passed the road with you, to achieve a passing edge, there will be to go, there will be a fate when there is a fate.


    I clearly know that no matter in reality or in the virtual world, no matter how we look back, we can only go further and further in the opposite direction.


    Buddha said that people should learn to let go. The more they put down, the more they feel they have.


    Although the truth is right, in reality I seem to be very difficult to do, hurt heart, past wounds, always want to try to mend, refused to discard.


    I opened my eyes difficultly, looked powerlessly ahead, and recalled the conversation and imagination just now


    She once told me that life must learn to put down, learn to give up, but why do I listen very reasonable, but always difficult to do in my heart? Why do you always refuse to give up?


    She told me to let go and give up, her heart really do it? Can she really let go and give up?


    My heart in the lonely and silent night repeatedly tangled and wandering, until late at night, I went back to the room, sleep.


    The next day, after breakfast, Yunduo chatted with his parents at home. I took Haizhu to ningzhou City, to Haizhu''s parents'' home.


    With good things, I just went out to take a bus, but I found that yesterday''s black Passat car was parked at my door. The driver was still the driver, and the reason was the same as yesterday''s: I was entrusted by someone to take someone''s money to send me to the city.


    I didn''t speak, directly pulled Haizhu into the car, and the car went straight to the city.


    On the road, the driver didn''t speak, just looked at the car. Haizhu and I sat in the back row. I looked at the driver''s expression from the inside rearview mirror, trying to find something. After a long time, we found nothing.


    Haizhu wanted to talk to me, looking at my frowning and thinking, so she didn''t speak.


    I tightened my brows and thought for a long time. Damn, who is this man? It seems that I will definitely go out to Haizhu''s home in the city today. How can he believe that I know so much about my itinerary?


    I thought hard, repeatedly compared and combed, for a long time, suddenly I was shocked: it''s broken, it''s bad, my mobile phone must be monitored!


    This is the only reason and conclusion that I can explain for this strange thing.


    Yes, if I didn''t listen to my conversations with Haizhu and Yunduo by phone, how could I know my whereabouts so thoroughly?


    When I came back, I only talked with Haizhu Haifeng cloud on the phone. Other people didn''t remember to mention it. The emperor only knew about it.


    The more I think about it, the more reasonable I feel. The more I think about it, the more frightened I feel. It''s amazing that my phone has been monitored unconsciously. It''s not for fun.


    I vaguely know that there is a kind of instrument, which seems to be imported from abroad. It is very advanced. As long as you input the mobile phone number of the other party, you can monitor the call content of the other party.


    So, has someone started monitoring me?


    My heart a startled, straight hair Leng, pondered pondering for a long time. Who would be monitoring me? Wood? Bai Laosan? Zhang Xiaotian? The emperor? Or Li Dongshun or even Sun Kai?


    After thinking about it for a long time, I think it''s possible, but I''m not sure.What does this man mean when he arranges a special bus to pick me up? Is he deliberately trying to let me know that he knows my details like the back of his hand or is he trying to be nice to me?


    I was so absorbed in my thinking that I couldn''t find a clue for a moment.


    "What are you thinking, brother?" Haizhu''s words interrupted my meditation. I took back my thoughts, looked at Haizhu, and laughed: "I''m thinking about going to your home and meeting your parents, how to speak and how to behave."


    Haizhu laughed: "is it a little nervous?"


    "Yes I answered honestly.


    Haizhu laughs: "it''s not the first time that you come to my home. My parents have known you very well. What are you nervous about?"


    "The content and meaning of going before is different from that of going this time. It''s extraordinary!" I said.


    "Ha ha, don''t be nervous. My parents have always liked you very much. When I came back this time, my family and I said in advance that they were very happy and waiting for us to go back and see you." Haizhu said.


    "Oh..." I nodded and looked at Haizhu: "did you sleep well in my house last night?"


    "All right." Haizhu nodded and looked at me: "brother, did you sleep very late last night?"


    "How do you know?" I said.


    "You went back to your room last night and opened the door. I heard something. It was midnight." Haizhu said: "you''ve been sitting under the grape trellis in the yard for a long time. In fact, I haven''t fallen asleep. I knew you were in the yard. I wanted to come out to look for you, but I was afraid you were not happy, so I didn''t come out."


    I laughed: "Oh Last night, I enjoyed the cool under the grape trellis. It was very comfortable. I fell asleep unconsciously. After a sleep, I woke up and went back to my room I opened the door with my hands and feet. I''m afraid I''ll wake you up. I didn''t expect you to hear me


    "People have been thinking about you You didn''t sleep with me last night. I couldn''t sleep Haizhu whispered in my ear.


    I laughed and said to Haizhu, "ha ha Think about it, don''t you? "


    Haizhu blushed and gave a angry smile. She stretched out her hand and twisted my arm: "screw you, I know this..."


    I laughed and then asked Haizhu, "did the clouds sleep well last night?"


    "Well It should be very good. She sleeps very quietly. We have a conversation in bed, and she soon falls asleep. Cloud was very happy yesterday. "


    I smile: "that''s good!"


    "In fact, we should invite Yunduo to my house today." Haizhu said.


    I shook my head: "not right now!"


    "Why?" Haizhu said.


    "That''s what your brother means." I went on to say what Haifeng means.


    After hearing this, Haizhu nodded: "well, I can''t see brother Haifeng as a big man. He thinks things very carefully It makes sense. "


    I said, "didn''t I think carefully last night?"


    "Fine, all right?" Haizhu said, "but I always think your reason is far fetched Of course, if you think so, I can''t say anything. No matter what I do, I always listen to you. "


    Listen to Haizhu''s words, I hold Haizhu''s hand and don''t speak any more.


    Soon, the car arrived at Haizhu''s home, Haizhu and I got off and went in.


    As soon as he entered the door, Haizhu was in front of him and said aloud, "Dad, mom, we''re back."


    Then I went in, and as soon as I entered the door, I was stunned -


    Haizhu''s family was full of guests. In addition to Haizhu''s parents, there were several strange faces that I didn''t know. They all looked at me with smiling faces, all ladies.


    "Ha ha," Haizhu said to me with a smile, "brother, these are all my relatives, this is my aunt, this is my aunt, this is my cousin, this is..."


    Haizhu introduced me one by one, and I quickly said hello. Being concerned by so many women, I was a little embarrassed for a moment.


    Haizhu''s parents warmly asked me to sit down. Haizhu''s mother happily took my hand and looked at it again and again: "Xiao Ke, I haven''t seen you for a long time When you came back this time, Haifeng called back in advance. I heard that you are doing things in Xinghai now, and you are in the same place with Haifeng Haizhu. Good


    "Listening to Haifeng talking about you and Haizhu, your uncle and I are very happy. You and Haifeng are good friends, and Haizhu are talking about friends. Your uncle and I know you well and like you very much. Together with Haizhu, well, we support Today, I heard that you are coming back. None of my relatives have seen you. I''ve come to know you. "


    I laughed: "uncle, aunt, you are still in good health ah, this time I and Haizhu vacation, specially come back to see."


    "Come back and have a look. OK, Xiao Ke, my uncle knows you very well. You are a person who does great things. Your ability is not average." Haizhu''s father seemed to speak to me, and to show some pride and boast in front of relatives.


    I smile a little embarrassed.


    Then, Haizhu''s mother got up and cooked in the kitchen. Haizhu went in with her and talked and laughed with her mother in the kitchen. Haizhu''s father and I chatted.


    "Xiao Ke, how are your parents?" Haizhu''s father asked me."Well, uncle, my parents asked me to say hello to you and auntie on behalf of you." I said.


    "Ha ha, I haven''t met your parents yet. When the time is right, I want to have a drink with your father!" Haizhu father said with a smile.


    I understand what Haizhu''s father meant by the right time.