ã€ŠWorth It (Forbidden Men #6)ã€‹


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    I loved the woods behind my house, from the fresh scent of pine to the crunch of twigs underfoot and especially those stray ribbons of sunlight that streamed through the tree limbs. But mostly, I cherished the absolute absence of human intervention. God, did I adore the quiet scuttle of squirrels pillaging through the foliage, birds chirping their daily chorus, and the flutter of the breeze through the hollows, like the breath of nature, whispering her secrets to me.

    So I¡¯d sought the woods with my e-reader almost every day this summer, escaping either my mother, my father, or both my brothers, pretty much my entire life in general. It was one big happy retreat.

    I had no idea why I hadn¡¯t come out here before this year. The quiet, relaxing solitude was addictive. And there was so much of it. My father owned a half-mile strip through the forest¡ªor three hundred and twenty acres, as he would classify it. The only other property to butt against ours was the Parkers¡¯, and their place was clear on the other side, so I had the entire three hundred and twenty acres all to mysel¡ª

    ¡°Watch out!¡±

    Startled out of my peaceful reverie, I whirled around, clutching my Kindle to my chest. But what...how...? Someone else was in my woods?

    No!

    Except there was no way to deny he was charging directly toward me as if the hounds of hell were after him.

    Oh...crap.

    He tried to stop and avoid a collision. I could tell by the way his arms flailed through the air as if he were grasping for invisible brakes, and by the widening of his eyes...right before he plowed into me with a jarring thud.

    The breath snapped from my lungs. Momentum from his run propelled me backwards and him forward. There was a brief moment when we were both soaring through the air that our gazes met in the hazy, pollen-clogged afternoon. His enlarged brown eyes filled with horror. Mine, fear. That¡¯s all we had time to do, share a single look¡ªI didn¡¯t even get in a good scream¡ªbefore we landed, him on top, me crushed beneath with my back to the forest floor.

    The fall didn¡¯t knock me unconscious, which was disappointing since the pain was immediate, searing up my spine and exploding out all four limbs.

    For a dazed moment, we lay together, a tangled knot of arms and legs. He crushed me to the earth with his warmth and the sharp incense of boy.

    I¡¯d never thought of what boys might smell like before. But he certainly didn¡¯t exude snips and snails and puppy-dogs¡¯ tails. He was musky and fresh with a hint of apple.

    And then his smell was taken away.

    ¡°Oh...shit.¡± He did an awkward crablike crawl to scramble off me, making me moan as his weight lifted and the release of pressure brought about more sensation, like that new throb of agony to my hip.

    ¡°Are you okay? Hey.¡± Hands gripped my shoulders and shook. When I did nothing, because the wind was still knocked from me, he said, ¡°shit,¡± again. ¡°Wake up. Please wake up. I¡¯m sorry. I¡ªshit...you have to be okay.¡±

    Fingers skimmed over my face and into my hairline, boy fingers, containing the slight rasp of callouses against the softest part of my cheek.

    Boy.

    Boy.

    Boy.

    Why did I keep noticing the boy aspects of him?

    And why couldn¡¯t I tell if I was wiggling my toes or not?

    And hey, why exactly was he running his fingers through my hair? The creeper.

    I realized he wasn¡¯t feeling me up but was rather searching for wounds about the same moment he found a goose egg on the back of my skull.

    ¡°Ouch!¡± Pain zapped through me, from the back of my head, down, until it shot out the ends of my feet. And yeah, I could definitely feel my toes now as they pulsed with an agonizing throb.

    I grabbed his wrist and flashed my eyes open. The first thing I saw was the straight, tall branches overhead with the blue sky peeking through, checking on me as if making sure I was okay. I transferred my gaze until I focused on concerned brown eyes, the skin around them wrinkled into a sympathetic wince.

    ¡°Are you okay? Let me help you up.¡±

    His warm, boy fingers wrapped around my elbow and more of them gently took hold of my shoulder. But when he tried to lift me into a sit, I sucked in a breath and curled away from him.

    He immediately let go and shied back. ¡°Sorry. Sorry.¡±

    I rolled onto my side, cradling my ribs, and bent my knees up toward my chest. But...ouch, this did not feel good.

    The boy hovered above me, his fear, concern, and indecision oozing with a pungent intensity. ¡°Where does it hurt?¡±

    I moaned, or maybe whimpered was a better word. ¡°Everywhere.¡± Closing my eyes, I gnashed my teeth and concentrated on nothing but breathing until I could bear the ache. Then I blew out a breath and began to sit up on my own. He shifted toward me and extended an arm as if he wanted to assist, but then he paused, changing his mind.

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    ¡°What can I do?¡± he asked, still with the anxious hovering.

    ¡°Nothing. I¡¯m fine. It¡¯s okay. I...¡± When I looked up, the words stalled on my tongue. Then they dissolved in shock as I realized I knew him. ¡°You¡¯re...¡± Well, maybe I didn¡¯t know him, know him. But I definitely knew what he was. He was, ¡°...a Parker.¡±

    I wasn¡¯t sure which Parker exactly. I¡¯d seen him in school; he was a year ahead of me. But I didn¡¯t know his first name. It had to be strange, though. They all had funky first names. Speed. Cobra. Mercedes. And there were a ton of them. Six or seven, or something like that. Their father had lined them up on our driveway and listed them off, right before yanking forward the only girl and claiming my brother Garrett had gotten her pregnant.

    That had been months ago, back in the spring. After a brief, private conference with Bruce Parker¡ªthe Parkers¡¯ dad¡ªmy father had dismissed them out of hand and sent the lot of them away, complaining throughout dinner that evening about how the dirty trash Parker family had upset his entire afternoon by daring to set their pathetic, second-hand-store shoes on his property.

    The entire scene had caused a stir for weeks, really. Father grumbled about how he¡¯d like to take the Parkers¡¯ land from them and send them away permanently. Mother had fretted over possible rumors circulating of any of her sons having had any kind of dealings with a Parker. Max incessantly teased Garrett about his impending fatherhood. And an indignant Garrett disclaimed all accusations. But I hadn¡¯t seen or heard from anyone in the Parker family since then.

    Until now.

    As my eyes grew big with shock, his narrowed in recognition.

    ¡°Bainbridge,¡± he hissed.

    And just like that, we were enemies.

    I recoiled while he shook his head, almost as if he were trying to deny our chance encounter. ¡°What¡¯re you doing out here?¡± he demanded.

    ¡°Excuse me?¡± I spit back indignantly. ¡°This is my family ground; what¡¯re you doing here?¡±

    ¡°I...¡± His eyes widened, filling with a jittery anxiety. Then he glanced around the trees as if seeking the most available form of escape. ¡°Shit,¡± he muttered to himself.

    Before he could explain himself, another voice boomed through the forest.

    ¡°Hey, Max!¡± Garrett¡¯s shout made me and the Parker boy jump simultaneously as it came from not too far away. ¡°You see him yet?¡±

    ¡°No. Nothing,¡± Max answered from the other side of us, the rustling of tree limbs revealing he was closer to us than Garrett was.

    ¡°Well, if you do, hold him for me. I¡¯m going to beat the ever-loving shit out of the dead prick.¡±

    I swerved my gaze from the direction of one brother¡¯s voice toward the other¡¯s, seeing neither of them through all the trees. When I returned my attention to the Parker boy frozen in front of me, his face had drained of color only to fill with fear and guilt.

    I gasped, suddenly understanding. ¡°What did you do?¡± I hissed, realizing he was the very dead prick my brothers were pursuing.

    Shaking his head, he lifted his index finger and pressed it against his mouth, begging me to keep silent.

    Like hell.

    He was a Parker. The enemy. Not to mention he¡¯d just tackled me to the ground and maimed me. I sucked in a lungful to scream for Max, but the Parker boy leapt at me and slapped his hand over my mouth.

    ¡°No,¡± he whispered harshly. ¡°Please.¡±

    I shrieked into his fingers and tried to pull away, but he lassoed my waist with his arm and banded me against him.

    I bit his hand, stomped on his foot and thrashed my head until my goose egg gave a violent pulse of pain and made me dizzy enough to gray my vision. Worried I was going to faint, I sank my teeth harder into the meat of his palm with renewed purpose.

    ¡°Mother of God,¡± he gasped but held on to me even tighter. ¡°Fuck. That hurts.¡±

    The salty tang of his flesh filled my mouth, startling me with how boy he tasted; it made me let up on my teeth hold, but I kept struggling in every other capacity.

    ¡°Stop. Please stop,¡± he said in my ear. ¡°I¡¯m not going to hurt you. I mean, any more than I already accidentally have. I just don¡¯t want them to kill me. Please don¡¯t help them kill me.¡±

    Stopping would mean surrender, and I could never surrender to a Parker. They¡¯d accused a member of my family of the most degrading crime. He was the enemy, and no Bainbridge surrendered to the enemy.

    I tried to scream again, so he swung me around, pinning me to a tree. The impact left my brain rattled. I let out a squeak of protest, and he must¡¯ve known he¡¯d expended too much force because he immediately let up half of his energy.

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    ¡°Shit, sorry,¡± he rasped into my ear as he used every inch of himself to hold me securely to the tree.

    Tears stung my eyes, and the fight left me as pain clouded my senses.

    ¡°Hey, you still awake?¡± The Parker boy jostled me, nudging his shoulder into mine when I went slack. ¡°Oh, fuck. I didn¡¯t kill you, did I?¡± His concern sounded strange since he¡¯d been the one to shove me into the tree in the first place.

    I bucked against him once and almost freed myself, but that was all I could accomplish before the fight seeped from me again.

    He huffed out his surprise and tightened his grip. ¡°Yeah, she¡¯s definitely alive.¡± His breath fanned my ear and the side of my cheek, stirring something hot and moist in the base of my stomach.

    Maybe the knock to my head had muddled my senses, or maybe it was something else, but the boiling tingle in my abdomen began to swirl out and into my veins until every inch of my skin felt prickly. It made me think about how close he held me, how good he smelled, how warm he felt. I wanted to burrow into his heat and let it soothe away every aching tingle inside me.

    My resistance slipped.

    ¡°I would never hurt you on purpose.¡± The words sounded sweet and genuine. They made me catch my breath with shock as I felt...I don¡¯t know, flattered maybe, by his sincerity.

    Then his boy fingers gently stroked the scrape on my elbow as if trying to caress the wound better. Again, things deep inside me clenched with a sensation that had my skin buzzing with full-body awareness.

    ¡°You know that, right? You¡¯re safe here.¡± His hushed voice coaxed more from me than he probably intended. ¡°Just...please stay still with me for a couple minutes longer, until they¡¯re gone, okay? Then, maybe give me a head start before you scream as loud as you want.¡±

    All I heard was, stay with me, and please. And oh my word, I was tempted to give him anything he wanted.

    But when I lifted my gaze to his, his chocolate brown eyes met mine, and he looked so...Parkerish.

    Parkers were the enemy.

    Crap, what was happening to me?

    Horrified because I¡¯d let a Parker momentarily drug me into his captivating spell, I struggled a little, just to let him know my answer about helping him wasn¡¯t yes. But I didn¡¯t put much effort into it, because honestly, he still affected me. I didn¡¯t want to be anywhere else on earth just then. I¡¯d never been this close to a boy I wasn¡¯t related to before. It was thrilling. Kind of daunting but also...amazing.

    My heart thumped in triple time, and I caught my breath when I realized I could feel the erratic beat of his heart, too, as his chest heaved against mine. I liked knowing he was as scared as I was...or as scared as I¡¯d been. I wasn¡¯t really scared any longer. I was captivated.

    His smell, his warmth...they got to me. I lifted my gaze to his hair; the flyaway dark locks matched the color of my favorite trees¡¯ trunks. I wanted to touch each strand, run my fingers through them, then bring them to my face and test how they felt against my cheek.

    ¡°Just who¡¯re we looking for out here?¡± a third person asked, sounding like Tad, Garrett¡¯s best friend. He was even closer to us than either of my brothers had been.

    I tensed. If we stayed here, we¡¯d be spotted within seconds. And I wasn¡¯t ready to be discovered just yet, not with the Parker boy so close to me.

    Acting quickly, he crouched behind our tree, bringing me down onto my haunches with him. He didn¡¯t even seem to realize I no longer struggled as he kept his hand loosely over my mouth. His touch felt more protective than it did ominous, as if he were trying to shield me from trouble instead of imprison me into it.

    ¡°The hell if I know,¡± Garrett called back. ¡°But I walked into my room to find some fucker with a dirty diaper, smearing baby shit on my bed. And when I find him, he¡¯s dead.¡±

    This time, the Parker boy sank closer as if seeking shelter from me. I almost touched him in reassurance. But I stopped myself, because that probably wasn¡¯t what I was supposed to do for the enemy.

    ¡°I bet it was one of them Parkers,¡± Tad answered. ¡°Still trying to claim their newest brat was yours?¡±

    Garrett let out a derisive snort. ¡°If you ask me, it was probably that filthy bastard Bruce Parker himself who knocked up his own girl.¡±

    The Parker boy¡¯s muscles coiled, and the vibration of his growl deep in his throat echoed through my bones. His eyes gleamed hard with vengeance as he clenched his teeth and curled his top lip into a snarl.

    I grabbed his wrist to stop him from acting. And at my touch, his surprised gaze slashed to me. I shook my head, begging him with my eyes not to react. I¡¯d seen Garrett mad before. From the sound of his voice, he was the kind of mad you didn¡¯t want to mess with. He tortured cats and small animals for the pure pleasure of it.

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    Thinking about the things he did out of anger made me shiver with horror and worry for this beautiful boy cowering against me.

    After staring at me for an overly long second, the boy blinked and seemed to relax under my beseeching gaze. Slowly, his hand fell from my lips. We continued to stare at each other as the search party combed past us, never discovering our hiding spot. Minutes drifted by and still, neither of us moved. Finally, he glanced away as if to ensure our safety. But his gaze tracked right back to me.

    ¡°You¡¯re not screaming,¡± he said, seemingly perplexed by the notion.

    Oh, crap. I was supposed to scream now, wasn¡¯t I?

    With a small clearing of my throat, I lifted my chin and straightened my back. ¡°Well...you¡¯re not running away.¡±

    His gaze darted around my face, confusion and maybe a little awe in his eyes. I think he realized then, just as I did, that maybe we weren¡¯t complete enemies after all.

    He straightened to his feet and backed a step away, seeming almost leery of me. When he turned to leave, I panicked, not ready for him to go.

    ¡°Hey.¡± I leapt up after him, only to cause my vision to blur and a dull ache to ricochet through my goose egg.

    He paused. A second passed, then two. Finally, he glanced back. ¡°What?¡±

    ¡°Did you really do that to my brother¡¯s bed?¡±

    A grin lit his face, a grin that had my stomach flipping over and my heart skipping madly. A slight nod later, he answered, ¡°And I¡¯m going to keep doing it every time I have to change one of his daughter¡¯s dirty diapers.¡±

    I exhaled a breath I¡¯d been holding, a little impressed he¡¯d had the nerve to do something so bold against Garrett, against anyone in my family, and even warmer in the belly that he felt so protective of his sister. I wondered if either of my brothers would seek that kind of justice for me if I¡¯d landed in the same situation. But what I said was, ¡°I can¡¯t believe you broke into my house.¡±

    ¡°I didn¡¯t steal anything.¡± He took a step toward me, then another.

    I didn¡¯t move away, but I did hold my breath. A toxic mixture of fear and excitement raced through me.

    Slowly, he lifted his hand. When I still refused to back away from him, he paused with his fingers lifted halfway between us. Then he gave in to whatever had been holding him back and reached out to pluck a broken twig from my hair.

    With a sharp breath, I glanced from the twig to his face. Then I shook my head. ¡°You still vandalized my brother¡¯s room. That¡¯s not right.¡±

    His eyes narrowed. ¡°It¡¯s a lot less wrong than what he did to my sister.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t...¡± When he lifted his eyebrows, waiting for me to continue, I took a quick breath. ¡°I mean, I don¡¯t think Garrett...you know...I don¡¯t think he¡¯s the father.¡±

    With a sniff of dismissal, the boy glanced away. ¡°Of course you¡¯d say that.¡±

    ¡°No, really. I¡¯m serious. I know my brother. I know he¡¯s not perfect. And he¡¯s definitely capable of doing something like...this. He can lie and deny the truth to your face only to turn around and brag about it to his friends. But I¡¯ve heard him talking to his buddies about this, and he still denies it to them.¡±

    ¡°Well, I¡¯ve seen the baby,¡± the Parker boy countered. This time, when he reached for my hair, it wasn¡¯t to pull anything from it. He wound a strand around his finger. ¡°And she looks exactly like you.¡±

    My breath caught. ¡°Well...I-I¡¯m certainly not the father.¡±

    He gave a soft laugh and smiled. Wow, I liked his smile. Were poor Parkers supposed to have such straight white teeth and amazing smiles?

    But then the smile dipped into an irritated scowl, as if he¡¯d just remembered I was one of the rich, pretentious Bainbridges. His fingers jerked from my hair. ¡°She¡¯s definitely related to you. Flaming red hair. Eyes so blue they¡¯re almost turquoise and only about two freckles on her entire face. Kind of pretty, actually.¡±

    I tried not to react, except my skin heated violently. His compliment blushed through my entire system, and every breath I took made me more exhilarated than the last.

    Until he had to add, ¡°For a Bainbridge.¡±

    Spinning away, he hurried off and disappeared around a tree.

    I stood there, gaping at the place he¡¯d just been. Even though he¡¯d tried to end our encounter with criticism, my chest expanded and filled with warmth and an exuberance I couldn¡¯t contain because it leaked out my lips and stretched the tips up until I was grinning like an idiot.

    He might not have taken anything from my home, but he¡¯d definitely just stolen something from me, something I¡¯d never get back. It was as if he¡¯d sucked out everything dismal and distressing in my life and left me glowing with nothing but a giddy radiance.

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    As my gaze dropped to the ground and I searched distractedly for my fallen Kindle, I felt uplifted and revitalized. I couldn¡¯t wait for him to come back and steal more from me.

    I think I knew, even then, my life would never be the same again.

    The electronic belch of the prison gate rang to notify guards on the other side whenever the doors were about to open. It was meant to be a warning. Caution. But to me, it was the sound of freedom, because today, they blasted for me.

    As I stood before them, the obnoxious wail echoed between my ears with a piercing intensity. It made my hands twitch at my sides and nerves rattle like loose change in my stomach. Then metal grated on metal as the gray steel began to peel apart, slowing baring the world beyond.

    Color assaulted me. A pristine azure sky, bright yellow taxi with a white puff of smoke coughing from the tailpipe, glistening silver gates, a piercing red stop sign down the block, and grass as green as the moss that grew on the trees in the woods behind my childhood home.

    I¡¯d been eighteen when I¡¯d stepped behind bars. For six years, my world had been nothing but grays and browns, blacks, and inmate orange. So I had to wince against the blinding onslaught of fresh, new color until I lifted my hand to shield my eyes.

    Sunlight warmed my chilled palm and it sent a ripple of anxiety down my spine. I tried to control my erratic breaths and slow the whiplash of my heartbeat, hide the overwhelming insecurities.

    I hadn¡¯t expected quite this level of emotion. What perplexed me most, though, was that the overriding sensation wasn¡¯t even relief. It was fear. I no longer knew this world. I wasn¡¯t prepared to step into it. I didn¡¯t even know if I wanted to be a part of it. But I sure as hell didn¡¯t want to stay here.

    Wiping my hand over my face to clear my expression, I took a step forward, my first toward freedom.

    The guard next to me nudged my arm. ¡°Hey, Parker.¡±

    The heels of my shoes collided with the floor, jerking me to a halt. Expecting him to hitch his chin toward the belly of the prison and drag me back to my cell¡ªtelling me this was simply a test run, I wasn¡¯t really being released today¡ªI did nothing but stare blankly when he pulled a folded bill from his pocket and extended it my way.

    When I only blinked at the cash, he jabbed it at me again, like some kind of jousting stick. ¡°Buy yourself some new clothes, will you? You look like shit in those.¡±

    My gaze darted from the money to his face, back and forth, a ticking pendulum of indecision. I didn¡¯t understand.

    I started to shake my head, so he sighed. ¡°Just take it already.¡± He glanced away, uncomfortable with his gift. ¡°It¡¯s only twenty bucks. You¡¯ll barely be able to buy a meal with that.¡±

    My eyes flared. If you couldn¡¯t even buy a meal with twenty dollars these days, I wasn¡¯t prepared for life on the outside at all.

    And there went the acid in my stomach again.

    ¡°Come on. I know you need it. I¡¯m the one who pulled your possessions. You have exactly eleven cents in your pocket.¡±

    I swallowed and slowly reached for the cash. ¡°Okay, thanks.¡±

    He glanced away. ¡°Don¡¯t get too excited, it¡¯s not much. I wish I could¡¯ve helped more. You¡¯re a good kid. You never belonged here.¡±

    My throat closed as I studied him. I was going to miss him. He¡¯d been the only source of nice I¡¯d had in the last six years, and I was probably never going to see him again. I opened my mouth to thank him, to say good-bye, to...I don¡¯t know. But nothing I thought to say sounded even remotely effective enough to convey what I really meant.

    ¡°I...¡± I glanced down at the money. ¡°It¡¯s more than I expected.¡±

    Shit, that sounded awful.

    The guard laughed softly and nudged my shoulder. ¡°Go on. Your ride¡¯s waiting.¡±

    I glanced at the taxi, then back to him. ¡°Good-bye.¡±

    He nodded. ¡°Stay out of trouble. I don¡¯t want to see you back here again.¡±

    ¡°Yeah.¡± He didn¡¯t have to worry about that. I sent him a small wave before half walking, half jogging toward my one and only state-funded cab ride to a destination of my choice.

    My clothes stretched and pinched as I moved. I¡¯d grown enough that the hem of my pants fell well above my ankles and my shirt was so tight the seams groaned, protesting each step.

    The last time I¡¯d worn this very outfit, I was being arrested for raping Abbott Bainbridge¡¯s only daughter.

    ¡°Where to?¡± the cabbie asked as I opened the back door and slid in.

    I sat there, staring at him. Where to?

    Why had I not thought of an answer for that question until this very moment? All morning, ever since I¡¯d been informed I was being let go, I¡¯d only been concerned about getting free; I hadn¡¯t even thought about what I¡¯d do when I actually was free.

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    I just knew what I wasn¡¯t going to do.

    I wasn¡¯t going to find her.

    ¡°Well?¡±

    ¡°Uh...¡± I drew in a breath and rattled off my address, though I had no idea what to expect once I actually reached it. No one in my family had come to visit me or contact me in any way, not once in seventy-two months. They probably had no idea I was out.

    My mom would be happy to see me, I was eighty percent certain of that. My dad would pitch a shit fit and most likely slap me around a little, then either put me to work or tell me to get lost. My brothers and sister...hell, most of them probably wouldn¡¯t even recognize me.

    But I didn¡¯t recognize myself, so they wouldn¡¯t be alone.

    As we approached the city, I stared out the window, identifying some landmarks, while other landmarks...not so much. Even the things I did remember looked different. Felt different. I tensed when I realized what was coming next.

    The Bainbridge estate. A long drive lined with trees that ended at a stone-set circle drive and introduced the snowy white mansion of Abbott Maxwell Bainbridge.

    When the tree line broke away, there sat his property, as proud and pretentious as ever. I sucked in a breath, not expecting the flood of longing, regret, heartache.

    It tore through me, shredding open my chest and slashing into my guts. The breath-stealing sensation lingered as his house just as abruptly disappeared and more trees sprang up.

    My trees.

    I clenched my hands around my knees and closed my eyes, ignoring the ache in my chest. My heart banged against each memory like a battering ram, bruising every tender image that flashed through my mind.

    If only...

    No. There were no what ifs. No should haves. No if onlys. This was life and how it had happened. I had to let go of the past and continue from here. Without her.

    The taxicab began to slow. I scraped my top teeth over my bottom lip to combat the nerves. I actually ached to see my mother, all my siblings, even our stupid worn-down shack of a home. I couldn¡¯t wait to¡ª

    The car pulled into a drive.

    I blinked.

    ¡°What¡¯s this?¡± I said, pointing out the window, sounding accusative, feeling accusative, as I scowled at the driver.

    But my home, the place where I¡¯d lived for the first eighteen years of my life, was...it was gone. A convenience store gas station sat in its place.

    ¡°It¡¯s your stop.¡± The cabbie put the car into park and glanced back at me nervously.

    I stared at him with a slight frown before turning back to gape out the window. ¡°But...¡±

    This was the right location, it had to be. My woods were right there, we¡¯d just passed the Bainbridge place, there was nowhere else the house could be. ¡°There should be a small faded blue cottage here.¡± With half a dozen broken cars in the yard that had grass and small trees growing up through their engines, along with a haphazard metal fence to keep in our hound dog, Tidbits.

    The cabbie sent me an odd look. ¡°How long you been locked up, kid?¡±

    Stupefied, I glanced back at the gas station.

    ¡°Too long,¡± I murmured, my shoulders falling as my hope deflated.

    ¡°Look, you can¡¯t sit here all day,¡± He shifted in his seat, probably uncomfortable and beyond ready to get the ex-con out of his car. ¡°This is the address you gave me.¡±

    ¡°Yeah, okay.¡±

    Fine. I¡¯d get out here.

    I tugged open the handle and stepped from the cab. It took off as soon as I shut the door.

    Lost, I stared at the store in front of me in confusion. I could see people inside, waiting in line to purchase soft drinks and cigarettes. Three cars sat in the lanes, pumping gas. It was so normal it felt dizzyingly surreal.

    But what was I supposed to do now?

    I scanned the outer wall for a pay phone, but didn¡¯t spot one, even though I had no idea who I would¡¯ve called if I had. Maybe I¡¯d find a sign, some kind of direction, a purpose, inside. I stepped forward to investigate, except behind me, I heard an approaching automobile. Wondering if I¡¯d left something in the cab, I glanced back and nearly pissed myself as a front bumper rushed toward me.

    ¡°Shit!¡± I leapt to the side as a silver Lexus veered around me and headed too fast toward the store. For a horrified moment, I thought it was going to jump the curb and crash into the side of the building, but it screeched to a stop at the last second.

    Idiot driver.

    Leaping onto the sidewalk so no other automobile would feel inclined to play chicken with me, I squinted and tipped my head to look through the windshield.

    Just what kind of rich prick thought I was so pancake worthy?

    I totally wasn¡¯t expecting to see a youngish woman with her eyes squeezed closed and tears coursing down her cheeks.

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    I slowed to a stop, watching her, my anger draining into a nagging, itching sensation I concluded might be concern.

    When she finally drew her driver¡¯s side door open like an old decrepit woman, my Spidey sense kicked in, telling me something was definitely not right. She put out a hand, then swung out a leg, but when she went to stand, she gasped and fell back into the driver¡¯s seat. As her face tipped forward, contorting with pain, I took a step her way, then paused and glanced around to make sure someone else wasn¡¯t already moving in to check on her. But no one else had noticed her.

    Damn it. Someone else should handle this. Not me. I wasn¡¯t the best candidate for helping a woman in trouble.

    She finally heaved herself from the car with a sob, and I saw how large her stomach was. Cradling her pregnant belly, she stumbled toward the curb. The same moment I noticed a trickle of blood running down the inside of her leg, she tripped and started to fall.

    ¡°Whoa. Hey.¡± I dashed to her and barely caught her in time.

    She clutched my upper arms, her fingers digging in hard as if the grip was helping her stanch the pain. Lifting her face, she managed to say between shallow breaths, ¡°I¡¯m sorry...did I...almost...run you over?¡±

    ¡°Fuck that.¡± I helped her straighten back into a stand. ¡°I¡¯m fine. Are you okay?¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m¡ªoh!¡± She doubled over and began to crumple, letting go of me to grab her stomach. I kept her upright and she leaned her bowed head into my sternum as a moan of agony tore from her throat. ¡°Something¡¯s wrong,¡± she said after considerable panting. ¡°I need to call my husband. Left my cell phone at home. So stupid.¡±

    ¡°We¡¯ll call him from the hospital,¡± I said.

    ¡°No!¡± She choked out a sob and started to cry. ¡°I don¡¯t want to go to the hospital. I don¡¯t want to lose my baby.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯re going to be fine.¡± I clenched my teeth when I heard my too gruff reply, hoping my voice hadn¡¯t scared her. ¡°The hospital will help you save it.¡±

    When she didn¡¯t shy away, I slipped an arm under her legs at the knees and wound the other around her back before I lifted her off the ground. I didn¡¯t know what else to say, what else to do. So I kept murmuring stupid shit, like how I was going to get her someplace safe so they could take care of her and make everything better. I had no idea if I was spouting off lies or not, but the words seemed to settle her as I carried her to the passenger side and opened the door.

    After placing her inside, I dashed to the opened driver¡¯s door and climbed behind the wheel. As soon as I sank into a cushioned leather seat, a shock wave of d¨¦j¨¤ vu and uncertainty claimed me. This was a nice car. An ex-con like me, twenty minutes free from the pen, should not be driving a car like this.

    But when the pregnant girl sucked in another breath of pain, I refocused on my main mission. Get her help. Fuck everything else.

    Grasping the gearshift, I glanced behind me and reversed from the parking spot. ¡°Is the hospital still on Twentieth and McClellan?¡±

    She shook her head and squeezed her eyes closed, her hand cradling her stomach in place. ¡°I don¡¯t...yes, maybe. That sounds right.¡±

    That was good enough for me. Checking traffic, I pulled onto the road, and a disorienting wave clouded me. It¡¯d been too long since I¡¯d last driven a vehicle. A blurry image of bright red hair filled the inside of my head, a girl¡¯s laughter as I peeled out rang through my ears, and my nostrils flared as if I could still smell her flowery scent while I followed her over the center console and into the backseat.

    Blinking the memories away, I shook my head and concentrated on traffic. But the pregnant woman¡¯s pain grew thick, her breaths shorter and whimpers louder.

    ¡°How you doing?¡± I asked with a quick glance her way.

    Her cheeks were even paler than her blonde locks as she sniffed and wiped at some of her tears. ¡°I can¡¯t believe I did this. I¡¯m so stupid.¡±

    ¡°No, you¡¯re not,¡± I tried to reassure her but only made her jump when I cursed and slammed on the brake before honking the horn and snarling more obscenities at the SUV who¡¯d just cut us off. When I had to brake again at a red light, I risked another glance her way. She wasn¡¯t faring any better than she¡¯d been thirty seconds before. ¡°It¡¯s not your fault this is happening.¡±

    But she bobbed her head, her wet eyes apologizing as she looked at me. ¡°It is. I¡¯m on bed rest; I wasn¡¯t supposed to leave the house.¡±

    The light turned green. I got us through the intersection and drew in a breath, trying to calm myself so I could help her. ¡°I¡¯m sure you had a good reason to leave.¡± Maybe talking would keep her mind off things.

 Page 8

    ¡°My husband...¡± she started, fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. ¡°His birthday¡¯s this weekend. I wanted...I needed to get him a present.¡±

    ¡°What did you get him?¡± I asked as 20th Street came into view. Thank God.

    The woman made a sound of pain. ¡°Two...two tickets to the science museum.¡± A brief pain-filled smile drifted across her face. ¡°He loves science.¡±

    I nodded. ¡°He¡¯ll like that, then.¡±

    But my answer only made her squeeze her eyes shut and cry harder. ¡°Not if I k-killed our baby.¡±

    ¡°No, don¡¯t even think that way. You didn¡¯t kill anything. Fucker,¡± I muttered when some dumbass turned in front of us to only go ten miles per hour. I swerved around him.

    Three blocks left. St. John¡¯s rose up from its surrounding buildings, its bright red hospital cross on the side, a beacon of hope. Almost there. ¡°How far along are you?¡±

    ¡°Sev...seven and a half months. Only thirty weeks.¡±

    I reached out and covered her trembling hand on her stomach and squeezed briefly as I turned into the hospital¡¯s parking lot. ¡°Your baby will be fine.¡±

    She looked at me, her eyes brimming with tears, and in that moment I knew she believed me because everything around her calmed.

    ¡°Will you call Quinn for me? Tell him...¡±

    When I parked at the entrance of the emergency room, she turned and looked up at the glass-fronted foyer. Her composure from moments ago dissolved. Sobbing uncontrollably, she hugged herself tight. ¡°I want Quinn.¡±

    I left her briefly to hurry around the car to her side. There was even more blood than before, but I didn¡¯t let my gaze linger on that. I scooped her into my arms and spun her toward the entry doors that slid open for us. Someone must¡¯ve seen us coming; a nurse was already pushing an empty wheelchair our way.

    After I set the woman down, she looked up at me with fear and panic, watching me take a step back while half a dozen more medical workers swarmed her. They barraged her with questions, but she kept watching me, her gaze begging.

    ¡°You¡¯ll get Quinn? My husband.¡±

    I nodded. ¡°Of course.¡±

    That seemed to quiet her. She turned her face aside to answer a nurse¡¯s question, and they whisked her away, leaving me standing there like a clueless dumbass.

    I glanced back at the silver Lexus, its engine still running in front of the opened hospital entrance. Realizing I had no idea what the woman¡¯s name had been, or how to contact her husband Quinn, I lifted my hands to wipe my face. But something red on my palms made me stop. My fingers froze halfway to my mouth, and I swallowed at the sight of fresh blood coating my skin. A wave of nausea swept over me.

    Blood on my hands.

    The last time I¡¯d looked down and found blood dripping from my fingers, I¡¯d just killed two men.

    He returned a week later. I hadn¡¯t honestly taken him at his word when he¡¯d said he¡¯d smear baby poop on my brother¡¯s bed for every diaper he had to change. But there he appeared in the doorway to Garrett¡¯s room when I was exiting my own to head downstairs one evening.

    We both stopped cold, wide-eyed and caught in the act.

    Finally, I scowled and set my hands on my hips. ¡°You did not,¡± I whispered harshly. ¡°Not again?¡±

    His grin was instant and so cute it melted my frown to mush. Then he gave a careless little shrug.

    With a roll of my eyes, I muttered, ¡°Oh, but let me guess. You didn¡¯t steal anything, right?¡±

    Lifting his hands, he turned them to show me his clean palms. ¡°Not even that brand new laptop on his desk.¡±

    I sighed and shook my head. ¡°You can¡¯t keep doing this. You¡¯re going to get caught.¡±

    His gaze scrolled down my body, making me warm enough to remember I wore nothing but shorty shorts and a tank top. Then he murmured, ¡°I haven¡¯t gotten caught yet?¡±

    ¡°Uh, excuse me?¡± I lifted an eyebrow, playing indignant. ¡°And just what do you think me coming out of my room and seeing you here is called?¡±

    ¡°Luck?¡± He flashed me another grin that, yeah, turned me into one of those girls¡ªthose stupid girls who abandoned all thought and reason for a pretty boy smile.

    My brain jumbled; I didn¡¯t even know how to respond. A giddy blush rose up my throat, but I swallowed it back down. I couldn¡¯t help the feeling, though; I liked thinking he considered running into me as lucky.

    Except I couldn¡¯t let him know that.

    I forced a scowl. ¡°I hope you have a good escape route planned because¡ª¡±

 Page 9

    The clatter of footsteps on the stairs squashed my lecture short. The Parker boy and I gaped at each other. He began to edge in reverse, back into Garrett¡¯s room, but from the sounds of the voices approaching, Garrett and his friend Tad were the two coming up, which meant they¡¯d surely discover anyone in his room within moments.

    Without pausing to think my decision through, I waved him forward. ¡°Quick. In here.¡±

    His gaze flashed toward the stairs. A breath later, he darted to me. I grabbed his arm and yanked him into my room, shoving the door shut behind us just as I saw the top of someone¡¯s head clear the second level.

    I covered my mouth with my hand, breathing hard into my palm. Oh man, that had been close. I looked up at the boy to see if he shared my thoughts, but he was too busy staring into my room with a look of horror.

    ¡°Is this your bedroom?¡±

    I frowned and leaned past him to try to view my room as if I were seeing it for the first time, because seriously, what the heck did he mean, saying it like that? It didn¡¯t look that bad to me. It wasn¡¯t all pink, and frilly, or overly girly at all. In fact, it was decorated in tones of blue. I didn¡¯t even have pictures of my favorite male movie stars tacked to my walls, mainly because my mother would¡¯ve disowned me if I had, though a life-sized poster of Stephen Amell would¡¯ve looked so good right above my bed.

    The covers on my mattress were neatly made, no clothes littered the floor, even my books were all lined precisely on my bookshelves. It was a perfectly respectable bedroom, if I did say so myself.

    ¡°What¡¯s wrong with it?¡±

    ¡°What?¡± He sounded distracted as he turned to me. I drew in a breath, not realizing we¡¯d been so close. But when he was looking at me, with his gaze boring into mine, it felt as if there was nothing between us. No space. No air. Just him and me.

    ¡°Nothing,¡± he finally said, sounding dazed.

    It really wasn¡¯t fair that he should be so beautiful. His brown eyes had a golden quality to them today, but his hair still looked as dark and carelessly arranged as it¡¯d been days before, as if he never combed it with anything but his fingers.

    ¡°Then why did you sound so appalled?¡±

    His golden eyes tweaked with confusion before he looked back into my room. ¡°I didn¡¯t. I just...¡± He turned back to me. ¡°I shouldn¡¯t be in here.¡±

    A quiet laugh blurted from my lips. ¡°You shouldn¡¯t be anywhere in this house.¡±

    ¡°Good point.¡± He opened his mouth to say more, but an enraged shout from Garrett¡¯s room told us my brother had discovered his newest diaper present.

    I grabbed the boy¡¯s hand and jerked him away from the door, taking him by surprise so that he had to stumble after me. ¡°This way.¡±

    I debated where to stash him. The closet? The chest? Under the bed?

    Footsteps rushed from Garrett¡¯s room; I didn¡¯t have much time to decide. I dragged him into my private bathroom with me. Just as I shut the door and locked it, Garrett stormed into my room roaring, ¡°Felicity!¡± A second later, his fist pounded on the door in front of me.

    I yelped quietly and jerked back, stumbling into the Parker boy who caught me against him, making me notice I was still holding his hand.

    Glancing up into his golden brown eyes, I found a measure of comfort. So I kept peering into them as I called back to my brother. ¡°What? I¡¯m in the bathroom.¡±

    ¡°Did you see anyone come through here? Some fucking dead boy?¡±

    ¡°Yeah, Garrett. I have a boy in here with me while I shave my legs.¡± Parker¡¯s eyes widened before I added, ¡°What do you think? Geez, no, I have not seen a boy in here.¡±

    A thump reverberated through my door as if my brother had just hit it with his fist in frustration. I jumped and then...I didn¡¯t mean to, but I sank closer to the boy beside me. His fingers tightened reassuringly around mine. When Garrett didn¡¯t try to slam his way into my bathroom, I slumped against the boy, and he seemed to share my relief because he leaned against me in return.

    ¡°Not a good time to be a smart-ass, Felicity,¡± Garrett growled. ¡°If you see him, let me know immediately.¡±

    ¡°Okay,¡± I called and rolled my eyes.

    And that was that. Releasing a breath as my brother¡¯s footsteps charged from my room, I smiled at my bathroom companion.

    But his confusion was obvious; he didn¡¯t smile back. ¡°You just lied for me.¡±

    Yeah, I didn¡¯t quite understand why I¡¯d gone to so much trouble for him either. If Garrett ever found out what I¡¯d done, he¡¯d show me the same lack of mercy he¡¯d show his diaper vandal. Except I knew I¡¯d do it the same way again if given a second chance.

 Page 10

    ¡°Well, I...I didn¡¯t want to become an accomplice to murder, I guess. And he would kill you.¡±

    But we both knew that wasn¡¯t the reason at all. As his attention fell to my lips and then dragged down my body, my cheeks flushed and my nerve endings crackled with electricity. By the time he made his way back up to my eyes, he was swiping the top of his teeth over his bottom lip.

    ¡°What¡¯s your first name?¡± I blurted the question, though by now I already knew the answer.

    I¡¯d pulled out every school album I owned after our first encounter, and I¡¯d spent an entire evening¡ªor three¡ªpouring over each picture I found of him. But I¡¯d die before I let him know that.

    ¡°Knox,¡± he said with a slight rasp in his quiet voice.

    Wow, I liked how he said his name. It sounded so much better than me reading it in my head, or me doodling it on a scrap of paper, or me sighing it while I daydreamed impossible scenarios.

    I nodded stupidly at Knox. Knox Parker. Knox Arrow Parker. ¡°I¡¯m Felicity.¡±

    He didn¡¯t answer, and I blushed hard. Even if he hadn¡¯t already known my name, he¡¯d just heard Garrett yell it through the doorway.

    I was such a moron.

    Growing warm from an embarrassed heat, I brushed my hair out of my eyes with one hand and glanced at the locked bathroom door. As I did, pressure on my other hand drew my attention down to where my fingers were, yes, still clinging to Knox Parker¡¯s calloused boy fingers.

    But I didn¡¯t let go of him, and he didn¡¯t let go of me.

    ¡°How¡¯s your head?¡± he whispered.

    I tore my gaze from our hands to frown at him, confused. ¡°My...what?¡±

    Amused, he grinned. ¡°Did I push you against the tree so hard you forgot you hurt your head the other day?¡±

    ¡°Oh.¡± I touched the back of my hair where the goose egg was long gone. ¡°Oh...that. Yeah, it¡¯s fine. I¡¯m as good as new again. Or...you know, as good as I was before, which...really isn¡¯t saying much, but...yeah, I¡¯m okay.¡±

    I cleared my throat and jerked my hand from my hair before I went back to staring at our interlaced fingers. It didn¡¯t seem natural that I was elated, wanting this moment to last forever, and yet uncomfortably self-conscious, wanting to die from mortification, at the same time. But if I did die right then with my hand warm in his, I was sure I¡¯d go a happy girl.

    Which had to be wrong.

    I needed to stop the madness.

    ¡°How long do you think we should wait until the coast is clear?¡±

    A muffled yell reverberated through the house.

    Knox glanced from the doorway to me. ¡°A bit longer, I¡¯d guess.¡±

    I smiled, and he smiled back.

    ¡°It¡¯s going to be a miracle if we get you out of here without anyone seeing you.¡±

    He nodded, but he didn¡¯t seem too concerned about it. He just kept watching me, until I cleared my throat, which seemed to alert him to what he was doing.

    Shifting his attention to the vanity, he took in a counter full of all my scattered, intimate toiletries. I cleared my throat again, a little unnerved by his inspection.

    ¡°Sorry, it¡¯s...yeah, a total mess in here.¡±

    His gaze veered back to me. ¡°You¡¯re not like them, are you?¡±

    I blinked, not following. ¡°Like who?¡±

    He hitched his chin toward my bathroom door. ¡°The rest of your family.¡±

    A slice of helpless depression swept over me. I glanced down at my hands¡ªour hands¡ªclasped together in such a familiar way. The comfort of holding on to him sat in stark contrast to the way every other awkward part of me felt.

    ¡°No,¡± I admitted glumly. ¡°I guess not. I¡¯m kind of the misfit.¡±

    Definitely the misfit.

    When Knox let out a small breath, I looked up. He¡¯d furrowed his brows and pursed his lips as if he had something to say to that, except he didn¡¯t.

    I pulled my hand from his, sure he¡¯d be glad to finally be free of me.

    My fingers felt cold and slightly damp from pressing them against his, so I rubbed my palm against my hip, but then felt sad about scrubbing his touch away.

    Spinning to hide my mortification, I reached for the door handle. ¡°I¡¯ll see if they¡¯re still looking for you.¡±

    Except another stifled shout had me yanking my fingers from the door.

    ¡°Or not.¡± I turned back to him. ¡°So what do you want to do to pass the time?¡± I blurted, my skin prickling with the worst case of nerves in my entire life. ¡°I mean, we could...¡±

    I glanced around the bathroom.

 Page 11

    There were tons of things a person could do in a bathroom, but none of them seemed like something one could do with a near stranger. A frown tugged at my brow. Well, crap. I kind of sucked as a hostess.

    Knox laughed softly, and I jerked my attention to him.

    His brown eyes twinkled with a warm humor that had me catching my breath in awe.

    He shifted closer. ¡°When I said you weren¡¯t like them, I meant nice.¡± He waved a hand in my direction. ¡°I meant you were nice, not some kind of weird misfit.¡±

    My mouth fell open. The expression on my face must¡¯ve alerted him to how strongly his words affected me.

    Color lit his cheeks. He cleared his throat and glanced away. ¡°I mean, you¡¯re not...you know.¡± When he flailed out his hand, I frowned, totally confused.

    He cleared his throat again. ¡°You know that day my dad dragged us all here...¡±

    I nodded, letting him know I remembered it well.

    He nodded too. ¡°Yeah, well... Everyone in your family looked at us as if we were trash. Your mom, your dad, both your brothers. But you...you¡¯ve never looked down on me like that. Not then, and not now.¡±

    My lips parted. It was such a profound compliment; I didn¡¯t know how to respond with as much flattery as he had delivered. So I mumbled, ¡°Well, I really can¡¯t...you know, look down on you. You¡¯re way too tall for that.¡±

    When he chuckled, my chest flooded with pleasure. I¡¯d said the right thing.

    ¡°You¡¯re funny.¡± Reaching out, he caught a piece of my hair and rubbed it between his fingers.

    I think he liked my hair. That made me feel...warm...all over.

    ¡°Funny, pretty, and nice,¡± he murmured more to himself than to me. ¡°I wasn¡¯t expecting that.¡±

    My mouth fell open. My head was so jumbled with crazy, crushy feelings I knew I shouldn¡¯t be having, I had no idea how to reply.

    ¡°So, really,¡± he said, continuing on as if he hadn¡¯t just flipped my world upside down. ¡°What are we going to do to pass the time?¡± Strand by strand, he let my hair tumble from his fingertips before he gathered another lock and repeated the action.

    When his gaze shifted to my mouth, I almost lost myself, sucked into his captivating charisma. But at the last second, I realized how crazy insane lifting up onto my toes and kissing him would be.

    I had to stop this.

    I was going to crack a comment about how obsessed he¡¯d become with my hair to douse the moment, but then I realized I¡¯d become just as obsessed with watching him play with it.

    We were quite the entranced pair.

    I licked my dry lips. ¡°I don¡¯t know. What do you want to do?¡±

    He shrugged, his attention slipping back to my hair as he began to wind it around his finger and force it to bob into a corkscrew as he pulled his finger free. ¡°If you really need to shave your legs, don¡¯t let me stop you.¡±

    I snorted and rolled my eyes. ¡°Yeah, sorry, but I¡¯ve already shaved them today.¡±

    Which was odd. I¡¯d shaved them yesterday too, and the day before that, along with every freaking day since I¡¯d run into him in the woods.

    Seriously, what was it about a cute boy that suddenly made a girl want to shave her legs every single day? There had to be something very wrong with that. Damn cute boys.

    ¡°But feel free to shave yours.¡± I motioned my hand toward the bathtub, and he laughed again.

    Ugh. What was it about damn cute boys who laughed at a girl¡¯s corny jokes that made her heart beat harder?

    ¡°I¡¯ll pass, thanks.¡±

    I loved that I could hear the smile in his voice. My soul sang.

    Blowing out a loud, dramatic sigh, I flipped my bangs out of my eyes, only to accidentally brush my hands against his where he was still fiddling with my hair.

    Stomach beginning to cramp from all the sensual heat in there, I shifted my weight from one foot to the other and rambled out nervous words.

    ¡°I guess we could do each other¡¯s hair, paint our toenails and gossip about cute boys, like a regular ol¡¯ slumber party.¡±

    The humor in his eyes made them a darker chocolate brown. ¡°I thought you girls only had pillow fights in your underwear at slumber parties.¡±

    I huffed out a disgusted breath. ¡°Not even close. That¡¯s just what you guys assume we do. The fact of the matter is we pig out until we¡¯re disgustingly bloated, and then we try to burp our bad garlic breath on each other.¡±

    Knox gaped at me as if I¡¯d kicked him in the shin. ¡°You just shattered every dream I ever had about slumber parties,¡± he said in the most serious voice I¡¯d ever heard him use.

 Page 12

    I blinked before I realized he was joking. Then I cracked a grin and shoved at his shoulder. ¡°Whatever.¡±

    ¡°No, seriously. Please tell me there¡¯s at least some experimental kissing. Or boob touching to compare sizes. Trying on each other¡¯s panties?¡±

    ¡°Eww.¡± I sent him a glare, but he only laughed.

    ¡°Oh, come on. You gotta give me something. There has to be at least one indecent thing that actually happens at slumber parties, or there¡¯s no hope left in the world.¡±

    I opened my mouth to call him a pig when a knock on my door made me yelp.

    ¡°Felicity?¡± It was Max this time. The good brother.

    He sounded concerned.

    Slicing a worried glance at Knox, I called back, ¡°Y-yeah?¡±

    ¡°Sweetie, I don¡¯t want to worry you, but someone broke into the house again. We¡¯re not sure if he¡¯s gone yet. So I¡¯m going to stay in your room until you get out, just to be on the safe side. But Father¡¯s already called the sheriff, who should be here soon, so don¡¯t be scared, okay?¡±

    I gulped and looked up at Knox, who¡¯d gone pale. ¡°Oh, shit,¡± he mouthed.

    ¡°Umm...actually, I didn¡¯t bring any clothes into the bathroom with me,¡± I told Max, biting my lip and praying he bought that.

    ¡°Do you want me to bring some to your door?¡± Max so considerately offered.

    I slumped my shoulders and met Knox¡¯s gaze. His brown eyes swirled with worry.

    ¡°No. No, just...can you wait outside my bedroom door? I¡¯m not sure what I want to wear yet.¡±

    He hesitated. I was positive he¡¯d tell me no, but then he finally said, ¡°All right, but hurry, okay? Father wants us all downstairs in the sitting room so we can be in one place.¡±

    ¡°Of course. I¡¯ll be out in a second.¡±

    I closed my eyes and held my breath until I heard his footsteps move across my room and then my bedroom door close.

    Exhaling silently, I slipped out of the bathroom as quietly as possible, even though I had no idea why I was being quiet about that.

    I tiptoed into my bedroom, and immediately I missed the close intimacy I¡¯d shared with Knox.

    Seeing that the coast was clear, I opened the door fully to set him free. He stepped into my bedroom, very pale.

    ¡°Now what?¡± he whispered, scowling. ¡°He¡¯s still right outside the door.¡±

    Oh, right. Crap. Why hadn¡¯t I thought that far ahead?

    I winced. ¡°Window?¡±

    He glanced over, and his face turned a sick green. ¡°You¡¯ve got to be kidding me.¡±

    ¡°There¡¯s a trellis,¡± I offered hopefully.

    He turned back to me. ¡°I hate heights.¡±

    I gulped. ¡°Oh.¡±

    This could be bad.

    But he didn¡¯t seem to stress out about his acrophobia. He just drew in a breath and approached the window slowly, studying it like a determined man on a mission...about to face his doom. After he opened the window and stuck his head out to calculate the drop, he jerked back inside and began to breathe hard.

    When he glanced back at me, his eyes were wild with panic. I brought my balled hands to my mouth, beyond worried. I so did not want to make him face his fear. ¡°Maybe you can wait in my bathroom until late, and we¡¯ll sneak you out after everyone¡¯s gone to bed.¡±

    He gave a vigorous shake to his head. ¡°If the cops are coming, they¡¯ll want to check every room before they leave. Don¡¯t you think?¡±

    I gave a weak shrug, not sure what would happen.

    He shook his head again. ¡°No, I can do this. The trellis looks sturdy.¡±

    Looks? What a not-very-reassuring word.

    I watched, biting my fingernail to the quick as he climbed out the window feet first. When the upper part of his body was still inside but his waist down was out of sight, he glanced at me. I sent him a tremulous thumbs-up, and he flashed me a brave smile before stepping down, and then disappearing from view.

    I raced to the window and poked my head out, only to find him still right outside my window, clinging to the trellis and cursing under his breath as he squeezed his eyes closed.

    ¡°Hey,¡± I called. ¡°What did the mute say to the midget?¡±

    He looked up, blinking rapidly. ¡°What?¡±

    I smiled. ¡°Oh, good. I have your attention. Now...just keep looking into my eyes, and then take one more step down.¡±

    His head slashed back and forth. ¡°I can¡¯t do this.¡±

    ¡°Knox,¡± I said sternly. ¡°One step. That¡¯s all. Now do it.¡±

    Agony filled his eyes, but he filled his cheeks with air and took one step down. Once he had his footing secured, he blew out the breath.

 Page 13

    ¡°You did it,¡± I cheered. My grin must¡¯ve been contagious because his trembling lips curved up at the corners. ¡°Yeah,¡± he admitted breathlessly. Then he broke out with a full-fledged grin. ¡°Yeah, I did. I did it.¡±

    Clapping him on, I called, ¡°Now do it again. One more step.¡±

    His smile died. ¡°Shit.¡±

    The sweat beading against his brow matted pieces of his hair together, but that only made him look better. Man, it had to take talent for a guy to look hot even when he was afraid enough to pee his pants.

    ¡°So, like I was saying... What did the mute say to the midget?¡±

    He scowled at me as he took the next step down. ¡°You really want to crack jokes when I could plunge to my death at any moment?¡±

    ¡°Of course.¡± I was pretty sure he didn¡¯t appreciate the forced cheer I put in my voice, but I kept it there anyway. ¡°Now, what did the mute say to the midget?¡±

    He sighed in exasperation as he eased another step down, and then paused to ensure he was stable. ¡°Hell, I don¡¯t know what he said. You¡¯re short?¡±

    I sighed, disappointed. ¡°No, genius. He didn¡¯t say anything. Get it? He¡¯s mute.¡±

    Pausing his descent, he speared me with an incredulous glance. ¡°Really? I could die, and all you came up with was a lame joke like that?¡±

    ¡°Hey, it¡¯s the only thing I could think up at the spur of the moment.¡±

    ¡°Well, it sucked.¡±

    ¡°Well, excuse me. What would you like me to come up with to distract you while you face the biggest fear of your life?¡±

    ¡°I didn¡¯t say this was the biggest fear of my¡ª¡± He looked down and immediately blanched. ¡°Oh God. I¡¯m going to die, aren¡¯t I?¡±

    Still clinging, suspended from the side of a two-story building, he was only halfway to the ground. It¡¯d take him just as long to climb back up as it would for him to go down. He looked gray, as if he might pass out.

    Passing out was bad. If he fainted, he would surely fall...and die.

    Panicking, I blurted, ¡°I kissed a girl.¡±

    His attention zapped upward. ¡°What?¡±

    ¡°At a slumber party,¡± I continued. ¡°We were playing truth or dare, and I had to admit I¡¯d never kissed a boy before, and that sometimes I practiced on my pillow or the back of my hand, or...whatever. So this girl said I could practice...on her.¡±

    His mouth fell open, and his brown eyes bugged intently. ¡°And?¡± he pressed.

    I almost snorted. Geesh, what was it about girl on girl action that made guys so excited?

    ¡°And...¡± Crap. Think, Felicity. ¡°And her lips were really soft.¡±

    Knox almost missed his next step down. My stomach dropped into my knees, and I had to swallow a scream, but he didn¡¯t even seem to notice his brief stumble. ¡°And?¡±

    I cleared my throat. ¡°And she, uh, she tasted like cherry lip gloss, smelled like rose petals.¡±

    I was worried that sounded too clich¨¦, but he murmured, ¡°Holy shit,¡± like he was really getting into the story. But then he had to go and add, ¡°Really?¡±

    I couldn¡¯t keep lying, so I sighed. ¡°No, not really.¡±

    He blinked, confused. ¡°Huh?¡±

    ¡°I¡¯ve actually never kissed a girl. Or a boy. Or...anyone, really. Heck, I¡¯ve never even been invited to a slumber party before.¡±

    ¡°But...¡± He shook his head. ¡°Why would you be so cruel as to lie about that?¡±

    ¡°You said my joke was lame! I had to come up with something to sidetrack you.¡± When he opened his mouth, frowning, as if he was going to argue with me, I held up a hand. ¡°And by the way, you only have one step left. You could probably jump to the ground from where you are.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± He looked down, and then cursed. A second later, he leapt off the wall and landed on both feet.

    It took him a moment to straighten and look up again. But once he did, awe packed his expression.

    ¡°Congratulations!¡± I called. ¡°You did it.¡±

    He nodded solemnly before bursting out, ¡°I can¡¯t believe you lied about that.¡±

    I laughed, and he scowled harder.

    ¡°You could¡¯ve at least let me believe it was the truth. You didn¡¯t have to go and crush my fantasy to pieces.¡±

    ¡°Oh my God. Why are all you guys such perverts?¡±

    ¡°Because all you girls¡ª¡±

    The sound of a car coming up the lane cut him short. We both nearly jumped out of our skins, knowing it was probably the sheriff. This side of the house didn¡¯t face the driveway, but it still wasn¡¯t a good idea for Knox Parker to loiter here, arguing with me. Plus, Max was still waiting outside my bedroom door. I¡¯d kind of forgotten about him.

 Page 14

    ¡°You better go!¡± I hissed as loudly as possible.

    Knox lurched into gear and started to race off, only to stumble to a stop a few seconds later and whirl back as he looked up at my window.

    When our gazes met, I shook my head, confused.

    What the heck was he doing? I waved him away, panicking, sure he¡¯d be caught any second.

    But he only sent me a short, respectful nod before mouthing the words, ¡°Thank you.¡±

    Then he was gone again, dashing toward the woods.

    Blood sprinted through my veins with a fervor that made me want to grab a pillow off my bed, scream into it as loudly as possible, and jump in an overexcited circle around my room.

    If my first encounter with Knox Parker hadn¡¯t left me with the biggest crush ever, then this second one certainly had.

    Fresh blood was surprisingly easy to clean from leather seats. Just a quick wipe down with warm water, and boom, it looked as good as new. Thank God I hadn¡¯t waited around for it to dry, though. That could¡¯ve been a bitch.

    Spending most of the twenty bucks and eleven cents I had on me, I stopped in at the first car wash I saw, and cleaned and vacuumed the Lexus inside and out. Then I drove it back to St. John¡¯s, where I sat in the driver¡¯s seat with my fingers wrapped around the steering wheel, wondering how I was going to get the keys back to their owner, and then wondering what the hell I was supposed to do after that.

    Someone at the hospital had assured me they would contact the pregnant woman¡¯s next of kin, so I didn¡¯t even have finding her husband to look forward to anymore.

    I had no idea where my family was, no idea where to look for them, or where to go, or what to do. I was broke, homeless, unemployed and didn¡¯t have a friend left in the world, it seemed.

    The panic of that reality started to swamp me, so I focused on the one task I did have. I needed to get this car back to its owner, except I couldn¡¯t ask about her at the desk. I¡¯d never gotten her name.

    Maybe there was only one pregnant girl in the maternity ward.

    Or maybe there were dozens.

    I wondered if she had something with her name on it in her car. When I glanced at the glove compartment, I winced, not wanting to intrude on her privacy. But fuck, I needed to get the keys back to her somehow. So I reached over and pulled open the little door. After shuffling through the owner¡¯s manual and a couple fast food restaurant napkins, I found her registration and pulled it out.

    ¡°Zoey Hamilton,¡± I murmured aloud, staring out the front windshield, before I returned her paperwork to the glove compartment.

    Okay, so I needed to find Zoey Hamilton, or more likely, her husband Quinn Hamilton, since I was sure Zoey was currently occupied. The name Quinn Hamilton sounded vaguely familiar, but I couldn¡¯t place where I¡¯d heard it before, so I shrugged and forgot about it.

    Find Quinn.

    I could do that.

    I stepped out of the car and shut the door. As I was pocketing the keys and wondering where the hell the maternity ward was in this place, someone shouted, ¡°Hey!¡±

    Without giving the call any notice, I stepped toward the hospital but that voice yelled again, closer this time. ¡°Hey, fucker! I¡¯m talking to you.¡±

    Finally, I glanced over to see some guy racing toward me, looking furious, with another man hot on his heels. The one in the lead had a head full of dark, messy hair and half his face was scarred, more scarred than the single slash mark bisecting my eyebrow and passing over my cheekbone. The one behind him was full of tattoos and face metal.

    ¡°What the fuck are you doing with this car?¡± Scarface demanded.

    I glanced at the Lexus, and then back to him.

    ¡°Are you Quinn?¡±

    A strange depression claimed me. I didn¡¯t want him to be Quinn. I didn¡¯t want to be done with my task yet. It was the only thing I had going for me. Besides, I¡¯d kind of wanted to make sure Zoey and her baby made it through okay. Hanging around the waiting room with her keys seemed like the best excuse I had for sticking around.

    ¡°Do I look like Quinn?¡± the guy asked, scowling hard as he set his hands on his hips.

    Since I¡¯d never met Quinn, I had no idea what he looked like.

    I frowned back. ¡°Honestly, you look like a dick to me.¡±

    His eyes narrowed as he took an intimidating step forward. ¡°And you look like a fucking dead man.¡±

    I sighed, not really into the idea of getting into a brawl when I hadn¡¯t even been released from the pen a day.

    The idiot was probably half a head shorter than me, too. But that didn¡¯t seem to bother him. He cracked his knuckles, and I tensed, ready to throw down if he took a swing.

 Page 15

    But the other guy caught hold of the back of Scarface¡¯s shirt, halting him. ¡°Whoa, hey,¡± he cajoled easily ¡°Maybe we should, I don¡¯t know, ask him why he has Zoey¡¯s car before pounding his face in.¡±

    ¡°The fuck with that. He just called me a dick.¡±

    ¡°No, actually he said you looked like one, not that you were one.¡± Then tattoo guy grinned at me. ¡°He really is a dick, though.¡±

    ¡°Hey, fuck you.¡± Scarface sent Tattoo a glare before shoving him away and spinning back to me. ¡°What¡¯re you doing with Blondie¡¯s car?¡±

    I blinked, confused. ¡°Who?¡±

    ¡°Zoey,¡± he growled before his friend jostled him quiet and added to me, ¡°The girl who owns it.¡±

    I nodded. Zoey equaled Blondie. Got it. ¡°She was...having some trouble,¡± I explained, not sure how much I could trust with these people. ¡°I drove her to the hospital, but there was blood, so...I took her ride to the car wash to clean it.¡±

    My answer seemed to take both men by surprise.

    ¡°Blood?¡± Scarface made a hoarse gasp. Then his face drained of color, which made his scars stand out starker. ¡°There was blood? Like...a lot of blood?¡±

    I nodded, and he blew out a long breath before pacing in a circle and running his hands through his hair. ¡°Shit,¡± he mumbled, while the second man clasped his hands as if in prayer and pressed them against his mouth.

    Their worry let me know Zoey Hamilton must be close to them. So I pulled her car keys from my pocket. ¡°Do you know how I can get these back to her or her husband?¡±

    Scarface snatched them from my hand and unlocked the car before ripping the door open and peering inside. ¡°I don¡¯t see any blood.¡±

    I ground my teeth. ¡°I just told you; I cleaned it.¡±

    He sent me an irritable glance over his shoulder before returning his attention back to the interior as if to make sure nothing was missing.

    Asshole.

    ¡°Why did you have her car in the first place?¡± He yanked his head from the inside and slammed the door. ¡°How do you even know Blondie, and what the fuck were you doing with her?¡±

    I arched a brow, silently letting him know he needed to back off. I hadn¡¯t survived over half a decade of hard time without learning a couple intimidation tactics.

    My stare seemed to work because he edged a physical step back, and his friend quickly interceded. ¡°What Ten meant to say was, ¡®How did you come across Zoey in the first place?¡¯ She was supposed to be home on bed rest.¡±

    ¡°Yeah, that¡¯s what she said.¡± I sighed and popped my neck. I was used to answering suspicion-filled questions, but I¡¯d never really learned to ignore the irritation that always came with them. ¡°Look, I was standing in a convenience store parking lot when this car came out of nowhere and almost clipped me. After it parked and...Zoey¡ªI guess her name is¡ªgot out, I could tell she was in distress, so I put her in the passenger seat and drove her to the hospital. On the way, she told me she¡¯d broken her bed rest to get her husband a birthday present for this weekend. Once I got her here, everyone rushed her inside to take care of her while her car was just sitting there, the doors wide open and blood everywhere. So...I took it to get it cleaned.¡±

    ¡°You mean, you just...cleaned a complete stranger¡¯s car out of the goodness of your heart?¡±

    I glared at Scarface, almost tempted to ask if he wanted another scar added to the collection. ¡°She didn¡¯t seem like she was in any shape to clean it herself, and I had nothing better to do.¡±

    Scarface opened his mouth, scowling back, but Tattoo thumped him on the back of the head to hush him. ¡°Well, thanks, man,¡± he said with a respectful nod to me. ¡°We really appreciate it. How much do we owe you?¡±

    I waved my hand and took a leery step back. ¡°Nothing. It¡¯s fine.¡±

    ¡°You sure?¡± He stuck out his palm to shake with me. ¡°What¡¯s your name?¡±

    I paused, before taking his fingers and mumbling, ¡°Knox Parker.¡±

    His grip tightened in mine before he jerked his head back to gape at me. ¡°Holy shit.¡± He squinted and studied me intently before he tipped his head to the side. ¡°You look totally different.¡± Then he smiled. ¡°I¡¯m Pick Ryan. You were a couple years behind me in school.¡±

    Remembering him, I nodded. ¡°Yeah, okay.¡±

    ¡°This is my friend, Ten. But don¡¯t mind him; his bark is bigger than his bite.¡±

    ¡°Hey, fuck you, man.¡±

    As Ten scowled at him, grumbling more complaints under his breath, Pick kept his intent gaze on me, until his inspection turned into a slight frown. ¡°Last I heard, you were still in prison.¡±

 Page 16

    ¡°What!¡± Ten exploded. ¡°Some ex-con was driving Blondie¡¯s car?¡±

    ¡°Shut it.¡± Without glancing at the hothead, Pick punched him in the shoulder and continued to watch me, waiting for my answer.

    I shifted, uncomfortable, wondering if he thought I¡¯d escaped or something. ¡°I just got out on parole.¡± Lifting my hand in the direction of what had once been my home, I said, ¡°The house...the place where I grew up... It¡¯s gone. There¡¯s a gas station there now.¡±

    Pick nodded. ¡°Yeah. They put that up about five years ago.¡±

    Five years ago? I stared at him, dumbfounded. ¡°What...well, what happened to the house?¡±

    I had no idea why I asked that; what I really wanted to know was what had happened to my family. Why had they left? Where had they gone?

    Bainbridge was behind this, I just knew it. After he¡¯d taken care of me, he¡¯d gone after my family next. Shit. I should¡¯ve known.

    ¡°Man...¡± Pick shook his head slowly. Regret filled his eyes. ¡°Did no one tell you?¡±

    The way he watched me, sympathetic and worried, made my skin itch. It had always prickled the same way in prison right before someone jumped me. Heeding the warning, I tightened my muscles, bracing for impact. ¡°Tell me what?¡±

    ¡°The, uh...the house burned. There was a house fire. It burned all the way to the ground.¡±

    I stared at him so hard he winced and glanced away. That wasn¡¯t all, I realized. There was more.

    ¡°And my family?¡± I said slowly. My chest heaved, telling me my breathing had picked up.

    Another grimace clouded Pick¡¯s face. I took a step back, not ready to hear this. But then he met my gaze and solemnly said, ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡±

    I clutched my stomach and doubled.

    ¡°Oh, shit,¡± Ten breathed. His sympathetic curse after being a total douche to me only made my urge to puke increase.

    I concentrated on breathing through my mouth as the nausea mounted. ¡°All of them?¡± I choked out. My entire fucking family? Gone?

    ¡°Most of them,¡± Pick said, his voice low. ¡°Your mom. Your sister. Your niece.¡±

    I sobbed out a miniature moan and immediately jammed my fist against my teeth to muffle anything else that might try to escape.

    But Pick kept going. ¡°And one of your brothers. I¡¯m sorry, I don¡¯t remember which one.¡±

    I nodded as if it was okay, but it wasn¡¯t okay. Nothing was okay. My stomach certainly wasn¡¯t okay. I dashed to the backside of Zoey¡¯s car, braced my hand against the trunk and leaned over to vomit, but nothing came up except the taste of acid, which sucked more than if I could actually puke because it didn¡¯t settle my nausea any.

    Behind me, Ten said, ¡°Holy fuck, no one bothered to tell him half his fucking family died in a house fire? Man, that¡¯s harsh.¡±

    Ignoring him, I stooped there another minute until I felt safe enough to stand. But as soon as I straightened, the queasiness returned.

    I watched Pick from unfocused eyes. ¡°What about the rest of them?¡± I asked, my gravelly voice even rougher than usual. ¡°Do you know where they are?¡±

    He opened his mouth, shut it, and then winced before shaking his head.

    He knew; he just didn¡¯t want to tell me.

    ¡°What?¡± I demanded.

    ¡°Your dad,¡± he started slowly. ¡°Got drunk out by the train yard a few years later. He was hit and...died. Then one of your brothers¡ªagain, I¡¯m not sure which one¡ªoverdosed on drugs.¡±

    I sniffed up air hard through my nostrils and nodded. ¡°And the other two?¡± I asked, not looking at him. ¡°The rest of my brothers?¡±

    He shook his head. ¡°I don¡¯t know. They went into foster care for a while and then went their own way. I have no idea where they are now.¡±

    Blowing out a long breath, I bowed my head and reassured myself that I most likely still had two brothers out there somewhere.

    ¡°How long have you been out?¡± Pick asked quietly.

    I swallowed. ¡°About an hour.¡±

    ¡°Shit.¡± He sighed. ¡°And you obviously have no place to go since you went home, only to find it...not there. Did you have anywhere else in mind to stay?¡±

    I glanced around the parking lot as if seeking a shelter, but all I saw was a sea of cars. So I shook my head. ¡°No.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s what I thought. Look, Ten and I were going to go inside and wait for some word about Zoey and the baby, but I can take you somewhere to crash for a few days until you get on your feet.¡±

    I blinked at him, not sure why he was so willing to help me. I couldn¡¯t offer him anything in return. I had nothing. And no one gave shit away for free.

 Page 17

    Pick Ryan had always been a good guy in school. But if there was one thing I knew for certain, it was that everything had changed in the last six years.

    It wasn¡¯t as if I had any other options, though. And a place to crash would be nice.

    Maybe I could play along until I learned the catch.

    ¡°You sure?¡± I asked, watching him intently, trying to discover his ulterior motive.

    Pick clasped my shoulder warmly. ¡°Yeah, man. Of course. It¡¯s no problem.¡± Waving Ten away, he called, ¡°Let me know as soon as you get word about Zoey, okay?¡±

    Ten flipped him off in answer and started toward the hospital as Pick guided me to an old Barracuda across the parking lot.

    Once we were away from his friend, he drew in a deep breath and glanced over at me. ¡°Now...let¡¯s talk business.¡±

    And here it came.

    I jerked to a stop, suddenly realizing where this was going. A big guy like me, straight from the pen...I guess I did have some use.

    ¡°Fuck that,¡± I growled in Pick¡¯s face. ¡°I¡¯m not going to be some drug runner for you, or hit man, or¡ª¡±

    ¡°Whoa, whoa, whoa.¡± Laughing, Pick lifted his hands and shook his head. ¡°No, you got me all wrong, Parker.¡±

    I tipped my head to the side, scowling, not sure what he was trying to pull.

    After one last chuckle, he let out a long sigh. ¡°I own a nightclub,¡± he explained. ¡°And Quinn¡ªZoey¡¯s husband¡ªis one of my bartenders. I was already looking for a spot to fill since business has been booming, but now that Hamilton will be down with Zoey, I¡¯m going to need help a lot sooner than I expected. It¡¯s completely legitimate work. Nothing under the table. I¡¯ll need your social security number and all that other legal bullshit to even hire you. So, now...are you interested?¡±

    He seemed serious, so I frowned, even more confused. I¡¯d just gotten out of the slammer, learned my family was gone, and someone was offering me a completely legitimate job?

    It didn¡¯t even sound possible.

    I shook my head. ¡°Wait, you own a nightclub?¡±

    In school, he¡¯d been one of the kids in foster care, always kicked around from one home to another and eating half-priced poor-kid lunches with me. ¡°How¡¯d you swing that?¡±

    He grinned and shrugged one shoulder. ¡°I fell in love with some rich man¡¯s daughter.¡±

    My stomach flared with heat as I narrowed my eyes. If he¡¯d been trying to make a dig at me, he¡¯d succeeded. I wanted to grab his neck and squeeze.

    When I actually took a menacing step toward him, realization widened his eyes. He instantly lifted both his hands. ¡°Not your rich man¡¯s daughter. Shit. Sorry. No. Someone else entirely...from Florida.¡±

    I don¡¯t know why, but my coiled muscles immediately loosened. Why the hell had I been so affronted? Even if he had been talking about her, it wouldn¡¯t have mattered. She wasn¡¯t my rich man¡¯s daughter. She wasn¡¯t my anything. Not any longer. She most likely belonged to someone else now. Some lucky, rich fucker who¡¯d never been in jail, never killed anyone with his bare hands or turned into a soulless monster. Someone who deserved her.

    And her rich daddy probably approved of him, too.

    ¡°No, this is a totally different rich man¡¯s daughter,¡± Pick went on. Then he shrugged. ¡°And my situation obviously turned out better for me than yours did for you.¡±

    ¡°Obviously,¡± I said dryly.

    He cleared his throat, forced a smile, and pressed, ¡°So, about that job...¡±

    It was bound to happen. The Bainbridge family was fated to cross paths in public with the Parker family. I was just glad my father or Garrett wasn¡¯t around when it did.

    Mother had taken me to the ladies¡¯ boutique on Broadway to get a dress for the cotillion she and her friends had set up as a charity fundraiser. I had no idea why people paid money to go watch other people parade their daughters around in fancy, frivolous dresses, but their yearly cotillions always brought in more cash than any other fundraiser.

    Mother found her favorite dress for me within an hour? only making me try on half a dozen outfits. It was laid out in a plastic bag she had draped over her arm when we left the boutique. We turned left to start toward her car when we had to pull up short to keep from getting run over by the rowdy mob leaving the hardware store next door.

    A bunch of talkative, hyper boys surrounded two women, the younger lady cradling a baby to her chest.

    I realized it was the Parker family about the same moment my mother gasped and jerked me backward away from them.

    Mrs. Parker froze as well, causing her daughter to pause and look up questioningly before meeting my gaze.

 Page 18

    I had to admit, Knox¡¯s sister was pretty. She had dark hair and eyes, just like him, but her bone structure looked more fragile and feminine, whereas he came across as sturdy and solid, masculine. She had big boobs, too. As she bounced the fussing infant, they stretched and heaved under her shirt.

    Garrett liked big boobs on girls. I¡¯d come across him and Tad looking at porn too often not to know this. He¡¯d probably like these¡ª

    And that¡¯s when I realized I was checking out some girl¡¯s rack. I yanked my gaze up, only to see bags under her eyes.

    Mercedes Parker looked way too young to be that worn. Sympathy flared inside me.

    She didn¡¯t share the sentiment, though. When she met my gaze, her eyes narrowed. Almost as if challenging me, she ripped the cap off her daughter, exposing a head full of thick red hair. Then she turned enough so that I could see the child¡¯s face, especially her bright blue eyes.

    ¡°Oh my God,¡± I blurted, too shocked to do much past gape at the kid.

    I knew I¡¯d spoken out of turn the moment the words left my mouth, but my mother still felt the need to squeeze my arm, hard.

    I sucked in a pained breath. ¡°I mean... She just... She looks¡ª¡± Mother¡¯s squeeze turned into the beginning stage of amputation, so I swallowed the rest of my surprise.

    Mercedes Parker glared at me. Her mother glared at me. Heck, even her unruly younger brothers calmed down enough to glare at me. Mother and I were sadly outnumbered and surrounded by a sea of killer glares. I edged toward her, almost afraid of so many glaring Parkers, only to discover my mother was glaring at me too.

    Silence reigned.

    I have no idea who would¡¯ve spoken first, or what they would¡¯ve said, but the standoff was interrupted by the dinging of the bell over the entrance of the hardware store as the door swung open again. Hauling a fifty-pound bag of dry dog food over one shoulder and cradling a brown paper sack under the other arm, Knox stopped whistling when he found his family halted just outside the door.

    ¡°What¡¯s the holdup?¡± A split second later, his gaze connected with mine.

    He pulled his head back, and his lips parted. Then he shifted his gaze to my mother, and his eyes grew dark. Jaw hard, he muttered, ¡°Well, let¡¯s get on. There¡¯s nothing to see here.¡±

    My chin trembled, and his family reluctantly followed his orders, moving past and casting us one final collective glower as they did. I was grateful Knox had saved us from death by glare, but I was also insulted that he¡¯d called me nothing worth seeing.

    He waited at the end of his family line, only to gaze once more between my mother and me. Then he killed all my hurt feelings by uttering a quiet, ¡°Ladies,¡± in a respectful if not tight-lipped voice before he stepped past us and trailed after the rest of the Parker clan.

    My shoulders loosened and breath heaved as I turned to stare after him. But he was so freaking beautiful. The stretch of the back of his shoulders as he held the bag of dog food was breathtaking. And his backside was just plain¡ª

    ¡°Stop staring at that filth,¡± Mother hissed, yanking on my arm that had pretty much lost all sensation by now.

    ¡°But that baby¡ª¡± Surely, she¡¯d seen it. Surely, she knew¡ª

    She slapped me. Hard. Right across the cheek.

    My mother wasn¡¯t the warmest, most loving parent in the world, but she¡¯d never slapped me before. It shocked me into shutting up.

    I gaped at her as she pointed a threatening finger at my nose. ¡°I don¡¯t know where that brat got its red hair, but it wasn¡¯t from any son of mine. Do you understand?¡±

    I blinked, feeling like a coward, because I wanted to call her out and I knew I wouldn¡¯t. But she knew¡ªhad probably always known¡ªthat baby belonged to Garrett.

    How could she just stand there and deny her own blood?

    ¡°Felicity,¡± she bit out from between clenched teeth. ¡°Do. You. Understand?¡±

    I dropped my gaze and nodded. Of course, I understood, and I hated what I suddenly knew.

    ¡°Good.¡± She grabbed my arm once more, her grip still too hard. ¡°We¡¯ll never speak of this again.¡±

    She dragged me to the car, and I couldn¡¯t help but to glance back one last time. When I did, Knox was beginning to glance back too.

    We both whirled away as soon as we made eye contact, but the zing of knowing he¡¯d wanted another look at me too followed me through the rest of the day.

    I found myself loitering at the beginning of the woods close to my house every afternoon, religiously. I wandered aimlessly around the property line, keeping myself occupied with a small survival kit I toted along with me. And at dusk, I slumped home, disappointed.

 Page 19

    Three days later, I hit pay dirt when I saw a form slipping stealthily through the trees toward me.

    My heart leapt into my throat.

    He¡¯d come back.

    He didn¡¯t see me, so I slunk behind a tree and slipped in behind him as soon as he passed. Exhilarated by his nearness, I bit my lip to contain my grin, but it escaped anyway. Right before he left the canopy of the woods and could step into the clearing that started our lawn, I cleared my throat.

    Startled, he spun around and crouched, lifting his hands in a defensive manner. One fist was full with a rank, used diaper.

    His ninja stance looked ridiculous with that clutched in his death grip. Slapping my hand over my mouth, I blurted out a laugh. ¡°I swear, if you use that diaper against me, I¡¯ll never forgive you.¡±

    ¡°Holy shit, Felicity.¡± Shoulders falling, he dropped his hands¡ªand that diaper¡ªdown to his side. Then he straightened to his full height. ¡°You scared the fuck out of me.¡±

    I continued to grin. ¡°Yeah, well, I think you would¡¯ve been more scared this evening if the sheriff showed up on your front porch, because he set up a spy cam in Garrett¡¯s room. Next time you step foot in there, with one of those¡ª¡± I tipped my chin toward the diaper, ¡°you¡¯ll be caught on camera.¡±

    He breathed a curse under his breath and immediately let the diaper fall to the ground by his feet. After a wrinkle of his brows, though, he sent me a suspicious frown. ¡°Are you playing me right now? Did they really set up a spy cam?¡±

    I scowled back and set my hands on my hips. ¡°Feel free to go inside and find out for yourself if I¡¯m lying.¡±

    Knox studied me a second longer. Then he blew out a breath and ran his hands through his hair. After glancing longingly toward my house, as if the urge to vandalize Garrett¡¯s bed was more than he could take, he turned back to me. ¡°Why do you keep helping me, saving me from getting caught?¡±

    The question caught me off guard.

    ¡°Be-because...¡± I shrugged and glanced away. I couldn¡¯t tell him it was because he was pretty; that was a stupid reason. Except it kind of was the reason.

    God, I was such an idiot.

    ¡°I need to show you something,¡± I blurted instead as I ripped my Kindle from the book bag I had strapped over my shoulder, where I¡¯d housed snacks and drinks and stories to help me pass the time while I¡¯d been playing stakeout and waiting for him to show.

    As I turned it on and flipped my way into the photo file, Knox wandered closer until I could smell his musky, apple boy scent. My fingers fumbled. I cleared my throat and finally scrolled to the picture I was seeking.

    ¡°Here.¡± I pressed on it to enlarge it.

    Knox frowned and took the Kindle from my hand. ¡°How¡¯d you get a picture of Bentley?¡±

    ¡°Bentley?¡± After a second of confused frowning, I gasped. ¡°You mean, the baby¡¯s name is Bentley?¡± When I made a face, he glanced up at me, lifting his eyebrows.

    I cleared my throat and immediately tried to soften my expression.

    He watched me with an amused smirk.

    ¡°Bentley,¡± I repeated again, much calmer this time. ¡°That¡¯s...¡± I wanted to say something positive, but I¡¯d never heard of anyone naming a girl Bentley, and to me, it sounded strange.

    Knox¡¯s lips twitched as he recognized my dilemma and loved my distress. ¡°Mercy thought it should be a car name, since she¡¯s Mercedes.¡±

    I nodded dumbly. ¡°Well, I guess it¡¯s good she didn¡¯t go with Lamborghini or Porsche, or...Ferrari.¡±

    His eyebrows arched. ¡°So you think Bentley is actually better than Lamborghini, Porsche, and...Ferrari?¡±

    When it struck me that he wasn¡¯t a big fan of the name either, I burst into a relieved smile and had to admit, ¡°Not really.¡±

    He laughed softly. ¡°Yeah, I give her crap about the name daily.¡±

    Geez, why did he have to look so good when he smiled?

    ¡°Do you really have brothers named Cobra and Speed?¡± I asked, just to keep him talking and maybe smiling some more.

    His laugh grew louder as he threw his head back. ¡°Unfortunately, yes. There¡¯s also Hash and Rocket.¡±

    ¡°Wow. You have the most normal name of the group.¡±

    Eyes glittering with amusement, he shook his head. ¡°Yeah, well my middle name¡¯s¡ª¡±

    ¡°Arrow,¡± I murmured before I could stop myself.

    When he pulled back in surprise, my eyes flashed wide. ¡°I mean...¡± Oh my God. I was trapped. Now he knew I was a creepy stalker who¡¯d hunted up his middle name.

 Page 20

    But instead of calling me out, he smiled softly. ¡°Yeah,¡± he murmured. ¡°Arrow. It¡¯s after the DC Comic, Green Arrow. But don¡¯t ask me where any of the other names in the family came from; I¡¯m pretty sure I don¡¯t even want to know.¡±

    His smile settled a little as he watched me, but his eyes¡ªthose golden brown beauties¡ªcontinued to glimmer with amusement. ¡°So, really.¡± He lifted the Kindle. ¡°How¡¯d you get this picture of Bentley?¡± He gazed at it thoughtfully. ¡°It looks kind of dated. Like, really dated.¡±

    ¡°Hey.¡± I frowned, offended, and ripped the Kindle from his hand. ¡°That photo¡¯s not even sixteen years old yet, thank you very much.¡±

    His eyes flared. ¡°You mean¡ª¡±

    ¡°This is my baby picture.¡±

    Mouth falling open, he looked back at the portrait. ¡°Oh my God.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know why you¡¯re so surprised,¡± I started conversationally. ¡°You already told me she looked like me. And then I saw her for myself in town, so...it¡¯s no shock to either of us.¡±

    ¡°Yes, it is. I said she looked like you, not that she could make an exact carbon copy of your baby picture. Holy shit, Felicity. This is...¡±

    Words failed him, so I nodded. ¡°I know. She¡¯s really Garrett¡¯s baby. She¡¯s my¡­niece.¡±

    It was the first time I¡¯d uttered the admission aloud, so I said it again. ¡°I have a niece, and I¡¯ve never met her, didn¡¯t even know her name until today. I have no idea when her birthday is.¡±

    ¡°April thirtieth,¡± Knox said quietly.

    I sent him a look, and he shrugged.

    I hugged myself as we stood there, neither of us speaking. Then I quietly murmured, ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡±

    He glanced at me and frowned. ¡°About what?¡±

    ¡°I didn¡¯t believe you.¡±

    Stepping closer to me, he slowly lifted his hand before grasping a wayward piece of my hair and winding it around his finger, then tucking it behind my ear. ¡°You really had no reason to believe me until you saw her for yourself. I¡¯m a Parker. You¡¯re a Bainbridge. Remember? It¡¯s in our blood not to trust each other.¡±

    ¡°But I should¡¯ve at least admitted it was a possibility. Except, it still makes no sense. Garrett is acting so indignant and insulted.¡±

    Knox snorted. ¡°And you thought he¡¯d act different?¡±

    ¡°Well...yeah. You don¡¯t understand. When he¡¯s getting away with something he did wrong, he¡¯s always so much more...smug.¡±

    Catching another few pieces of my hair, he began to braid them together. ¡°Maybe he¡¯s still worried he¡¯ll get caught, so he¡¯s acting it off.¡±

    ¡°Hmm. Maybe.¡± I watched his face as he played so intently with my hair. I was just as drawn under as he was while he twisted two strands together, only to let them go and watch them spiral apart, before he did it all over again.

    A content, peaceful quiet grew between us. I don¡¯t think he even realized neither of us had talked for over a minute.

    Finally, I sighed as I studied him, soaking in his striking, Parker features.

    ¡°You know, I am aware my father is a shrewd, calculating businessman with no mercy or softness whatsoever, but he works hard to take care of our family. And my mother...sure, she¡¯s the biggest snob of the century, but so many of her charitable events have made this town beautiful and helped¡ª¡±

    ¡°Are you trying to get me to like your family?¡± Knox cocked me a strange look.

    ¡°What? No.¡± I sputtered for a moment, trying to remember what point I¡¯d been getting at. Then it all came back. ¡°I just...everyone treats me nice because of who my family is. And I...I¡¯ve always kind of been proud to be a Bainbridge, you know. I would¡¯ve defended any of my relatives, whether I knew if they were right or wrong.¡±

    I looked up into his curious eyes and bit my lip. ¡°And I know it looked like I was going against my brother when I didn¡¯t help him catch you for what you did to his bed, but that wasn¡¯t any disrespect to him. It was just¡ª¡±

    ¡°Kindness?¡± Knox said quietly, watching me intently. ¡°To me.¡±

    I blushed and gently pulled my hair from his hand because it was distracting me too much. ¡°I don¡¯t know. Maybe. But the fact of the matter is, until the other day, I respected my family. But when my mother refused to even accept the possibility that the baby could be her own granddaughter, especially after seeing her, I...I felt...shame. I was so ashamed to be a snooty, ignorant Bainbridge.¡±

 Page 21

    With a sniff, Knox reached for my hair again. ¡°That¡¯s not such a deep, dark confession. I¡¯m ashamed of being a Parker damn near every day.¡±

    Meeting his gaze, I shook my head solemnly. ¡°Yet you¡¯ve snuck over here three times to get vengeance for your sister¡¯s honor.¡±

    He shrugged and focused his attention on slowly sliding his finger down one glistening red lock. ¡°I get what you¡¯re saying. They¡¯re our families. Flaws and all, they¡¯re ours, and they¡¯re the only one we¡¯re ever going to get. So, we naturally want to feel loyal toward them. But you also have to admit it¡¯s okay to be disappointed when they let us down. And you don¡¯t always have to agree or follow what they say or do.¡±

    When his brown gaze lifted to meet mine, I expelled a breath I hadn¡¯t even known I¡¯d been holding. ¡°Good point,¡± I whispered. Then I realized something. With a flash of clarity, I blurted, ¡°Bentley¡¯s my family.¡±

    He dropped my hair from his hands and frowned, almost suspiciously. ¡°Okay, yeah. I guess. Your point?¡±

    I straightened my back. ¡°The rest of my...relatives might not claim her, but I¡¯m going to.¡± Except, I wasn¡¯t sure how. I¡¯d probably never see that little redheaded baby again, unless... I tilted my head to the side. ¡°Hey... Do you think...?¡±

    I flushed, knowing it was an impossible request.

    ¡°What?¡± he asked, shifting closer.

    ¡°Nothing. I just...I want to see her again. I mean, can I... I don¡¯t know.¡± Feeling like the idiot I was, I set my hand against my forehead and began to turn away, but Knox¡¯s voice stopped me.

    ¡°You want me to set you up with an introduction with Miss Bentley? Without anyone else knowing about it?¡±

    I whirled back to him, hopeful. ¡°Do you think that¡¯s possible?¡±

    He shrugged. ¡°I don¡¯t see why not. I could say I was taking her outside for a walk or something. Mercy would be grateful for a break. Then you could just meet us in the woods.¡±

    I tucked the piece of hair he¡¯d been playing with behind my ear. ¡°Really?¡±

    He nodded. ¡°Sure.¡±

    My heart began to gallop. I was setting up a rendezvous meeting with Knox Parker. Yeah, there¡¯d be a baby present, but still...it was too exciting to handle.

    I bobbed my head. ¡°Okay, that sounds...that sounds great. Thank you.¡±

    He nodded as well. ¡°No problem. Does this afternoon work for you?¡± When I nodded again, he grinned. ¡°Cool. We could meet, I don¡¯t know, by the tree where we first ran into each other.¡±

    He remembered the tree where we¡¯d met? Aww. Okay, fine, it¡¯d only been a few weeks ago. Of course he¡¯d remember the place where he¡¯d pinned a girl to keep her from screaming to her brothers and alerting them of his presence so they didn¡¯t kill him.

    But still...he remembered!

    ¡°Sounds like a plan,¡± I answered, sounding way too casual for how much I was really flipping out inside. ¡°I¡¯ll see you there.¡±

    So, I went home with Pick Ryan.

    In high school, I¡¯d always felt sorry for the guy. Everyone knew the story of how he¡¯d been abandoned at the hospital by his birth mother when he was born. He¡¯d never known anything but foster care, and he¡¯d always seemed to get the worst possible luck in caregivers.

    My family had been poor, my father a no-account drunk, and my mother was hardly ever around because she worked too hard to bring in the money. We kids had run wild and rarely went anywhere with clean, neatly kept clothes. But we¡¯d had each other, and that counted for something. Pick Ryan hadn¡¯t even had that.

    Yet, here I was sitting in the passenger seat of his classic monster car, relying on him for my next meal and room and board.

    Because now I was the one who had nothing.

    It felt strange to think those words. Nothing. No mother. No father. No sisters or brothers. My entire family... Gone.

    Chest heaving, I clenched my suddenly trembling hands into fists in my lap and tried not to think about my mother or sister, or baby Bentley trapped inside our house, burning to death. But maybe the flames hadn¡¯t taken them. Yeah, the smoke had probably killed them first, cutting off their air supply and slowly suffocating¡ª

    Okay, that didn¡¯t help. Sweat slipped down my temple and I had to shift in my seat of Pick¡¯s suddenly cramped car.

    I wondered if they¡¯d died in their sleep without realizing what was happening, or if they¡¯d been awake, screaming, begging for someone to save them.

    ¡°So, you got a kid?¡± I blurted, glancing toward Pick.

 Page 22

    I¡¯d seen the child¡¯s car seat in the back when I¡¯d first climbed in. I hadn¡¯t planned on mentioning anything because I hadn¡¯t felt all that chatty. But now, anything to divert my thoughts was welcome.

    ¡°Two, actually,¡± Pick answered.

    As I nodded, not sure what to say next, he continued. ¡°You remember Tristy I used to hang out with?¡±

    ¡°Yeah.¡± I¡¯d never been fond of her. She¡¯d been too bitter, too susceptible, too hardened. And she¡¯d always managed to suck Pick into some form of trouble that he had to save her from. Learning he¡¯d had a kid with her depressed me. I¡¯d kind of hoped he¡¯d broken free of her.

    But, wait. Hadn¡¯t he said he¡¯d fallen for a rich man¡¯s daughter? Tristy had been in the same boat as him¡ªfloating from one foster care family to the next.

    ¡°She¡¯s dead,¡± Pick stated mildly enough to make me startle.

    ¡°Tristy?¡±

    He nodded, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth so he could clank his teeth against his two lip rings. ¡°When she died, I adopted her son. And Tink has a girl of her own, which makes two little rug rats toddling around our place.¡±

    ¡°Tink?¡± I asked

    Pick¡¯s entire face lit up. ¡°My woman,¡± he explained. ¡°I call her Tinker Bell, but her real name¡¯s Eva. You¡¯ll meet her soon enough.¡±

    I didn¡¯t realize just how soon until he parked in front of an apartment complex and then led me up to a third-floor entrance.

    ¡°Hey, Tink,¡± he called as soon as he opened the door and stepped inside, leaving me to follow. ¡°I¡¯m home.¡±

    I had no idea he was going to bring me to his place, so I stopped uncertainly in the doorway.

    ¡°What? Already?¡± a female voice answered before a stunning blonde appeared in the hallway with a toddler on one hip and another trailing along behind her. ¡°What about Zoey and the¡ª¡±

    Her words died on her tongue the moment she saw me. ¡°Oh! Hi...¡± she said hesitantly, transferring a confused glance to Pick and then back to me.

    ¡°Baby, this is an old school friend of mine...Knox Parker.¡±

    ¡°O...kay.¡± She furrowed her brow before sending me a hesitant smile. ¡°Hey, Knox. It¡¯s nice to¡ª¡± But her eyes flashed wide before she jerked her attention to Pick. ¡°Wait. Is he the one who¡ª¡±

    ¡°Yes,¡± Pick cut in, answering immediately and loudly. When the kid on the floor hobbled to him and lifted his arms, Pick bent to retrieve the child and set him on his hip. ¡°That¡¯s exactly who Knox is. And I will explain everything to you....¡± His eyebrows lifted meaningfully. ¡°Later.¡±

    His Tinker Bell only blinked. ¡°Okay, but what about¡ª¡±

    When Pick widened his eyes tellingly, she quieted and glanced at me. I tried to squeeze inside my huge frame as much as possible so I didn¡¯t look as large and murderous as I couldn¡¯t help but appear. Then I took a step out of the apartment and back into the hallway.

    But what the hell?

    Pick had brought me to his home...to his wife and children, without even clearing it with her first? Was he insane?

    His woman was going to toss me out on my ass, and then where would I be?

    ¡°I was hoping he could stay here a few days,¡± Pick started. ¡°Just until he found a place of his own.¡±

    Yeah, I was screwed. Eva looked startled to find a large, intimidating ex-con in her living room. ¡°I can go,¡± I offered, hooking my thumb over my shoulder to motion toward the exit of the building.

    But Eva lifted her hand to stop me. ¡°Don¡¯t be ridiculous. Of course you can stay. We¡¯re happy to have you.¡± Then she waved me forward. ¡°Come in and shut the door already.¡±

    ¡°Thank you, baby.¡± Pick kissed her on the mouth, and then kissed the girl in her arms on top of the head. ¡°I swear, we¡¯ll get him back on his feet in no time. But right now, I really need to make a phone call.¡±

    ¡°Are you going to call¡ª¡± Eva started, but Pick answered, ¡°Yeah,¡± before she could finish the question. Then he kissed her again and strode from the room with a baby still on his hip.

    Left alone with Pick¡¯s wife...girlfriend...whatever she was...didn¡¯t sit well with me. I shifted my weight from one foot to the other and tried not to look her straight in the eye.

    ¡°So.¡± She put an overwhelming oomph of cheer in her voice. ¡°Welcome to Casa de Ryan. I¡¯m Eva, by the way. This little sleepyhead is Skylar. Pick just took off with Julian, and this is our humble abode. We¡¯ll bunk the kids together so you can have Julian¡¯s bedroom since his bed is bigger than¡ª¡±

 Page 23

    ¡°I can sleep on the couch,¡± I offered, not planning to kick anyone out of his bed, especially a little boy.

    ¡°Oh, no. It¡¯s fine.¡± She waved my offer aside. ¡°Those two prefer to sleep together anyway. One usually gets up in the middle of the night to find his or her way into the other¡¯s bedroom. I¡¯m not sure why we bother to even try to separate them.¡±

    As she spoke, the girl in her arms wiggled free to get down.

    Eva let the child slide to the floor. ¡°So, we¡¯ll just set you up in Julian¡¯s room, like I said,¡± she went on as if she didn¡¯t even notice her child was tottering straight for me. ¡°Because it¡¯ll be easier for me not to have to dress up the couch every night.¡±

    The kid stopped in front of me and lifted her arms, clearly wanting me to hold her.

    I darted my gaze to her mother, but Eva just smiled at me and lifted her eyebrows as if to say, Well, what¡¯re you waiting for?

    I hadn¡¯t held a baby since the morning of the day I was arrested, when my sister Mercy had needed me to rock Bentley to sleep for her nap.

    A needle of agony burrowed into my chest.

    Bentley probably hadn¡¯t even made it to this age.

    I knelt in front of Skylar, trying not to let my grief get the best of me, but then she smiled, and I wanted to bawl even more.

    ¡°Maw-maw-da-da-gah-gah-bah,¡± she said, waving her hands with each word.

    I glanced at Eva to see if I was supposed to understand something in all that mess, but she only shook her head and shrugged.

    ¡°Skylar¡¯s our little jabber box. Julian¡¯s usually the one who doesn¡¯t say anything unless he has something serious and understandable to say.¡±

    Skylar stepped closer to me, and whacked me in the eye. ¡°Maw-maw-da-da-gah-gah-baw.¡±

    Eva gasped and stepped forward. ¡°Skylar! No hitting.¡±

    ¡°No, it¡¯s okay,¡± I assured her, holding up a hand to let her know I wasn¡¯t hurt...right before Skylar grabbed me by both ears and stared me straight in the eyes. ¡°Maw-maw-dadddddaaaa,¡± she hollered.

    I had no idea what she was trying to tell me, so I picked her up. Her diaper-clad tush mashed against my forearm, sending up a sharp reminder of the times I¡¯d held Bentley, and how Mercedes had screeched at me that she was too young to be held upright that way, except I¡¯d always held the kid¡¯s head securely and she¡¯d seemed to enjoy being able to gaze around a room, so I¡¯d kept doing it.

    ¡°Gah-gah-baw,¡± Skylar murmured as if appeased before she rested her head on my shoulder and went limp and satisfied against me.

    ¡°Well...¡± Eva lifted her eyebrows as if impressed by my skill. ¡°I guess she got what she wanted.¡±

    I tried to relax, but the tension made that impossible. I should not be holding such innocence, standing in such a nice, family-oriented home, sleeping in some cute little boy¡¯s bed. I didn¡¯t belong here, and I kept waiting for the moment when someone finally fucking realized that.

    To make matters worse, my stomach growled. I¡¯d been released midmorning, and it was long past time when our noon meal would¡¯ve been served.

    Eva sent me a sly smile. ¡°Can I fix you some food?¡±

    I shook my head, not wanting to be beholden. ¡°No, thank you, ma¡¯am. I¡¯m fine.¡±

    Except my stomach growled again, belying my words.

    ¡°You sure about that?¡± Eva lifted her eyebrows. ¡°If you¡¯re going to be here for days, I¡¯m afraid you¡¯ll have to eat eventually. And I¡¯m really not that bad of a cook.¡±

    I clenched the back of my teeth before giving a brief nod. ¡°All right, then. Thank you.¡±

    She nodded as if pleased with my answer. ¡°Oh, and if you don¡¯t mind holding her while she sleeps, you can sit in the rocking chair with her.¡± She stepped toward me and held up her arms. ¡°Or I¡¯ll take her and put her in her room.¡±

    I didn¡¯t mean to set a possessive hand on the back of the kid¡¯s head, but that¡¯s exactly where my palm landed when Eva moved in. I hadn¡¯t realized Skylar had fallen asleep on me; it made me even more attached to her. She reminded me so much of Bentley. I¡¯d had no idea all kids smelled so much alike.

    The powdery baby scent filled my nostrils with nostalgia and soothed something inside me.

    ¡°I don¡¯t mind rocking her.¡±

    Pick re-entered the living room just as I was easing down into the chair, trying to be careful not to wake his daughter.

    He jerked to a stop and lifted his eyebrows. Then he grinned wide. ¡°I see Miss Never-Met-a-Stranger-She-Didn¡¯t-Like has discovered you.¡±

 Page 24

    ¡°I guess,¡± I mumbled, trying to seem as if I wasn¡¯t delighted to be holding the kid.

    Across the room, Julian noticed his mom¡¯s arms were empty and he tried to dive at her for his turn to be held. As Pick and Eva transferred him from one set of arms to the other, Eva sent Pick an earnest glance. ¡°Did you reach her?¡±

    He gave a terse, jerky shake of the head. ¡°Not yet. My call went straight to voice mail. But I did talk to Ten, and Zoey had the baby.¡±

    As I lifted my gaze, curious for this news, Eva gasped. ¡°Oh my God, already? Is everyone okay?¡±

    She gripped his arm, her eyes wide. Pick drew both her and the child she was holding against him for a hug. ¡°I think so, yeah. They put baby J.B. in the NICU because his lungs were still underdeveloped, but all the doctors seem optimistic. And Ten said Zoey was doing great. They¡¯d all been in to see her. Quinn wouldn¡¯t leave her side.¡± Pick glanced at me over Eva¡¯s shoulder. ¡°Sounds like you got her to the hospital just in time, Parker.¡±

    ¡°Wait. What?¡± Eva pulled out of Pick¡¯s embrace so she could frown between the two of us. ¡°What did I miss? You mean, Knox took Zoey to the hospital? How did those two even meet?¡±

    ¡°All part of the million and one things I need to update you with,¡± Pick answered.

    She grabbed his arm. ¡°Well, then come into the kitchen with me, because I want to be updated right-freaking-now.¡±

    Pick chuckled but followed her wishes.

    As I was left alone with Skylar, I turned my head to sniff her dark hair, wishing it were red. She sighed in her sleep, all her little muscles relaxed as she rested so trustingly against me. I was able to give back a little of my own trust, and the tight coils inside me loosened. I closed my eyes and continued to stroke her head.

    The soft hair under my fingers brought back memories. When sleep snuck in around me, it was the first thing I dreamed about, my hands buried deep in rich red hair. Long dark lashes fluttered before blue eyes opened to peer at me with an expression of warmth that filled me with a joy I¡¯d never felt before.

    The peaceful, binding sensation followed me as I looked around at the forest surrounding us, the chirp of birds soothing more of my soul. Finally feeling at home for the first time in too long, I reached for a hand I would recognize anywhere, and smooth, familiar fingers tangled with mine.

    Life was perfect, until someone nudged my shoulder. ¡°Hey, Parker. Tink has some lunch ready for you.¡±

    I blinked awake and started to shift upright in the chair until the weight in my arms alerted me to the fact I was still holding Skylar. ¡°Sorry,¡± I mumbled, bringing her off my shoulder and down into the cradle of my arms. ¡°I must¡¯ve dozed off.¡±

    Instead of feeling more tired as I usually felt after a rest full of nightmares, I felt refreshed, and I realized it¡¯d been because I¡¯d had a nice dream. A dream about her.

    My gut clenched. I hadn¡¯t dreamt about her in years, unless it was a nightmare where something bad was happening to her.

    ¡°Not a problem,¡± Pick told me. ¡°I fall asleep all the time when putting them down for naps.¡± He bent over me and took the sleeping infant. ¡°I¡¯ll put her to bed so you can head into the kitchen. Eva whipped up a sandwich and some soup for you.¡±

    My stomach gave another grumble, so I pushed out of the rocker. Julian was seated in a high chair demolishing a plate of sliced bananas and raisins, eating a few as well. When I paused in the entrance, Eva glanced up from where she was ladling soup into a bowl at the stove.

    She smiled. ¡°Take any seat you like, though I warn you, if you sit too close to Julian, you¡¯ll probably end up sticky and gross. He tends to fling food.¡±

    I sat next to the kid anyway, because the seat closest to him looked like the most inconspicuous, out-of-the-way spot between the table and the wall.

    Julian paused in the middle of smashing a piece of banana into his plate. Then he picked up the mutilated chunk and held it my way, as if making some kind of peace offering.

    I shook my head. ¡°No thanks.¡±

    Eva chuckled and set the soup and sandwich in front of me. ¡°Pick always offers him a bite off his plate, so I think Julian assumes sharing food is an expected course of etiquette now.¡±

    I tore off a crustless piece of the grilled cheese Eva had made me, and offered it to Julian. He took it gracefully and then shoved it not-so gracefully into his mouth before sending me a big grin.

    ¡°And your male bonding is complete.¡± Eva slid into the chair across from me, and even though she sent me a warm smile, it made me tense.

 Page 25

    Bonding with her children was one thing. Getting cozy with her was quite another. And I realized exactly why a moment later while she watched me dip my crust into the tomato soup to take my first bite.

    ¡°Pick says you didn¡¯t have that scar before you were arrested.¡±

    And here came the reason adults were so much more complicated. They asked questions you didn¡¯t want to answer. Though to be honest, my scar was the last topic I thought she¡¯d attack.

    I touched the area briefly. ¡°No.¡± My gruff answer put out the warning signals, cautioning her not to go there. ¡°I didn¡¯t.¡±

    But she did, anyway. ¡°Did you get it when you killed those two men in prison?¡±

    I gazed at her steadily, refusing to answer. All the while, in my mind¡¯s eye, I saw the crudely crafted blade slashing toward me, felt the sting of the tip as it sliced open my flesh, tasted the blood as it dripped into my mouth.

    ¡°So it¡¯s a story you don¡¯t wish to share.¡± Eva nodded respectfully. ¡°I have a couple of those.¡± But instead of leaving me be, she kept on. ¡°Pick says you look totally different, much bigger, buffer. And you talk gruffer. You even walk different, with a bit of a limp.¡±

    Remembering the distinct black sole of the boot that had hurled at me right before it kicked in my windpipe and crushed it, and the pain in my leg when they¡¯d stabbed that, I cleared my throat and concentrated on swallowing down a dry piece of toast.

    ¡°I lifted weights a lot to help pass the time,¡± I said, feeling as if I needed to give her some kind of response, or she¡¯d just keep pestering.

    She smiled big. ¡°I figured you weren¡¯t the type who liked to stay idle.¡±

    ¡°No, ma¡¯am.¡±

    With a nod, she added, ¡°Maybe you¡¯d like to help me carry some boxes of old baby clothes down to my car once you¡¯re done eating then.¡±

    ¡°Okay.¡± I put down my spoon and began to stand, but she laughed and waved me back into my seat.

    ¡°Not now. After you eat. There¡¯s no hurry. They¡¯ve been boxed up and ready to take to Goodwill for weeks. I keep meaning to ask Pick to carry them out, but for some reason, I always get distracted whenever I see him.¡±

    He appeared in the doorway, and I could tell exactly what distracted her about his presence as her gaze heated and ran over him. He went to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, so I looked away, trying to forget how it¡¯d always felt to be near that one special person, how just her smile could light me up.

    I focused my attention on Julian as I watched Pick and Eva kiss out of my peripheral vision. He offered me another chunk of banana. This time, I took it without a word.

    ¡°I¡¯m going to check on one of my waitresses who isn¡¯t answering her phone. So, I¡¯ll be out for a couple minutes.¡±

    When I glanced up, I noticed he was telling me his plans, not Eva. She didn¡¯t look surprised, so I figured he¡¯d already shared this news with her, along with the million and one things he¡¯d gossiped about me while I¡¯d been sleeping.

    A split second later, I tensed, realizing he was leaving me alone with Eva. The idiot hadn¡¯t seen me in six years, and even then, we hadn¡¯t been all that close, mostly just passing acquaintances. He knew why I¡¯d been arrested; he knew what I¡¯d done when I was in prison. Why the hell was he being stupid enough to allow me to be here with just his woman and two kids?

    Eva cleared her throat. ¡°Do you want me to go and talk to her?¡±

    Pick leaned down to kiss the top of her head. ¡°Not this time. I don¡¯t like her boyfriend and don¡¯t want you to have to deal with him if he¡¯s there.¡±

    She narrowed her eyes. ¡°I think I can handle¡ª¡±

    ¡°Not on my watch, babe.¡±

    Before Eva could protest again, he kissed her full on the mouth. Then he straightened, snagged a set of keys off the wall, and pointed at Julian. ¡°Behave for your mother while I¡¯m gone, squirt.¡±

    ¡°Bye-bye,¡± the boy called and held up a slice of banana to his father.

    Pick grinned at him and leaned down to take the food straight from Julian¡¯s fingers with his teeth. ¡°Mmmn. Thanks, man.¡±

    Eva shuddered. ¡°That¡¯s so disgusting. You know he just slobbered all over that.¡±

    ¡°You mean, like I¡¯m going to slobber all over you?¡± With a wicked grin, he descended on her. She screamed out a laugh and dodged her face to the side, but Pick caught her and kissed her, anyway.

    I looked away again, catching Julian¡¯s eye. He grinned at me, his smile seeming to say, they do that all the time.

 Page 26

    When Pick pulled away, he waved at me. ¡°We¡¯ll talk work schedules when I get back.¡±

    After he left, I was still too leery to take a breath. I couldn¡¯t figure out why he hadn¡¯t wanted Eva to go somewhere where he didn¡¯t like one of his waitress¡¯s boyfriends, but he hadn¡¯t thought twice about leaving her here alone with me.

    ¡°Pick is a great judge of character,¡± Eva said, making me jump.

    Wondering if I¡¯d said something aloud or she was just reading my mind, I glanced at her suspiciously. She sent me a soft smile. ¡°I swear, I can smell the tension oozing off you. You didn¡¯t want to be left alone with us, but don¡¯t worry, I¡¯ll stop bothering you and asking you a load of questions. Okay?¡±

    I wanted to tell her she could ask anything she wanted to. This was her home; she had a right to know what kind of person was staying in it. But I was too relieved for a reprieve to voice any of that.

    ¡°I will put you to work as soon as you¡¯re finished eating, though.¡±

    And that¡¯s what she did. After my soup and grilled cheese sandwich were gone, she held Julian and instructed me as to which boxes to carry and where to take them.

    About the time I finished, Julian fell asleep on her shoulder and Skylar woke from her nap. After putting one to bed and carrying the other into the living room, she sent me an exhausted sigh. ¡°Believe it or not, once upon a time I had them on a schedule where they slept at the same time, but not anymore.¡±

    I tried to see my own mother in her, perpetually exhausted, too busy to sit and just relax. She¡¯d always looked aged beyond her years, and sad. So freaking sad. Eva didn¡¯t seem sad, though. There was an energy and youth about her that told me she thrived off the life she had.

    I opened my mouth to tell her it seemed as if she had mothering down to a fine art, but the front door opened and Pick returned.

    ¡°Hey.¡± Eva met him there with a kiss. ¡°How¡¯d she take it?¡±

    Pick sighed, his shoulders sagging. ¡°She wasn¡¯t there. Some other woman answered the door, and apparently¡­¡± Pick glanced at me. ¡°My waitress no longer lives there.¡±

    With a gasp, Eva shook her head. ¡°Since when?¡±

    Pick shrugged. ¡°No idea. I didn¡¯t stick around to find out.¡± Growling out his impatience, he paced further into the room and ran his hand through his hair, only to pause when he caught sight of me watching him.

    Eva came up behind him and grasped his arm. ¡°When¡¯s the next time she¡¯s scheduled to work?¡±

    ¡°Friday,¡± Pick answered, keeping his gaze on me.

    ¡°Do you think she¡¯s okay?¡±

    ¡°She¡¯d better be.¡± He hitched his chin at me. ¡°I think we¡¯ll start you at the bar tomorrow. It¡¯s kind of an initiation rite to begin our new bartenders on ladies¡¯ night, anyway.¡± His grin was secretive and amused, which made me narrow my eyes, but I shrugged, because it didn¡¯t matter to me which night I started. I was actually restless to start as soon as possible. The sooner I made some money, the sooner I could get out of their hair.

    The rest of the night passed. Both kids scurried around, providing some entertainment. And Pick talked, updating me on people we both remembered from high school, except he never shared a single detail about the only person I really wanted to know about. And I refused to ask about her, because it was best if I never learned where or how she¡¯d turned out.

    But still, I wanted to know, and it itched at me that he didn¡¯t even mention her, didn¡¯t volunteer one stray crumb of information.

    Eva dug up some old black T-shirts of Pick¡¯s from back when he was a bartender at the very club he now owned. They were too tight on me, but we figured they¡¯d do until I could get my own set of clothes.

    Then Pick did an internet search on my brothers. We didn¡¯t find the location of any living Parker I was related to, but he did find out Speed had been the one to die in the fire, and Hash had overdosed on cocaine.

    When I went to bed that night, tucked away in Spiderman sheets, I couldn¡¯t stop thinking about my brothers, my sister, Bentley. My parents. I wondered where Rocket and Cobra were and worried about how painfully the others had died. When I finally fell into a restless sleep, blood and sirens and smoke filled my head. My mother and sister screaming for help. My father staring into the headlights of an oncoming train. And the root of all my nightmares, the voice in my head saying, ¡°I¡¯ve been waiting months to get my hands on your sweet ass again, Parker.¡±

    I woke mid-moan, thrashing on the single-sized bed and soaking it with sweat. Once I realized where I was, I rolled flat on my back and stared up at the glowing stars tacked to the ceiling until my breathing calmed.

 Page 27

    I was safe. I was free. I had something to look forward to. It was more than I¡¯d had the night before, and yet a heaviness settled deep into my bones. My family was gone, my criminal record would always keep me from aspiring too high, and the woman I loved¡ªwould always love¡ªwas out there somewhere, probably curled up in some other man¡¯s arms.

    Rolling onto my side, I punched my pillow to fluff it when I sensed someone enter my room. I froze in the dark and squinted, hoping I hadn¡¯t woken Pick or Eva with my nightmare, but when I saw the silhouette of my guest, I realized it was one of the kids.

    It waddled toward the bed and began to climb onto the mattress with me. I could tell it was Julian by the hair.

    ¡°Nigh-nigh,¡± he mumbled before collapsing against me and settling in for sleep.

    I lay there frozen, not sure what to do. It didn¡¯t feel right to kick the guy out of his own bed, but it felt wrong to let him stay, too. I didn¡¯t want Pick to think I was some kind of pedophile, stealing his kids in the middle of the night and dragging them to bed with me. But Julian had already made himself at home and didn¡¯t seem like he was willing to move.

    So I let him cuddle against me. He was out in seconds. Five minutes later, his sister found us. She crawled onto the bed, created another nest on top of me and was asleep almost as quickly as Julian.

    For some reason, I didn¡¯t mind the intrusion. Their sweetness and innocence had a calming effect. When I dropped off not long after them, I didn¡¯t have another nightmare for the rest of the night. My dreams were filled with red hair, blue eyes, and a smile that meant the world to me.

    He was already there when I arrived, cradling a wiggling bundle in his arms. He didn¡¯t see me at first, which gave me some time to appreciate the sight of him bending his head over the infant and cooing at her, his strong shoulders and back muscles shifting under the cloth of his worn T-shirt. When he paced under a break in the trees, a slice of sunlight flared down on him, making his chocolate brown hair more golden.

    My breath caught as I slowed to a stop. He had to be the most breathtaking boy to ever grace the planet. And he was here, waiting for me.

    When I stepped forward, a twig snapped under my feet. He lifted his head and smiled. ¡°There you are.¡±

    His grin did things to me. The way his lips stretched and his eyes warmed as if he were genuinely happy to see me, it melted my insides.

    ¡°Keep smiling, kiddo,¡± he told the baby. ¡°Someone¡¯s here to see you.¡±

    ¡°Is she smiling?¡± Forgetting about the crazy stir he caused in me, I hurried forward, momentarily more curious to see the baby than I was to see him.

    He turned and twisted his arms to put her on full display, and I caught my breath, freshly surprised by how much Bainbridge she had in her. The red hair looked particularly bright in this light, and her blue eyes were wide and curious as she gazed up at me.

    ¡°Hi, baby Bentley,¡± I cooed, tickling her chin. ¡°I¡¯m your Aunt Felicity.¡±

    When Knox sucked in a startled breath, I glanced up, worried. ¡°What?¡±

    I immediately scanned the trees, sure we were caught. I was so busy darting my gaze around for trouble, I didn¡¯t catch his expression until he said, ¡°I just realized you¡¯re related to her just as much as I am.¡±

    Shoulders easing, I brought my attention back to Knox and our niece. Sending him a small smile, I hedged, ¡°So, I guess that would mean I have just as much right to hold her as you do?¡±

    He sniffed out an amused sound. ¡°Is that your way of asking if you can hold her?¡±

    I nodded and batted my eyelashes at him playfully. ¡°Pretty please?¡±

    His grin broke out, even though he made a big, groaning production about having to give her up. ¡°Okay, fine. If you¡¯re going to be a big baby about it.¡±

    But as soon as he started to hand her over, I lost my nerve and jumped backward. ¡°Wait.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± This time, he was the one to scan the trees as he tucked Bentley protectively close.

    I blew out a breath. ¡°Nothing, I just...I realized I¡¯ve never actually...held a baby before.¡±

    ¡°You¡¯ve never...¡± He blinked a few times before he burst out laughing.

    ¡°I don¡¯t see how that¡¯s funny at all,¡± I muttered, my face growing scarlet. ¡°What if I don¡¯t hold her right? What if I hurt her? What if I...break her?¡±

    ¡°Oh my God. Seriously?¡± He bent slightly, he was snickering so hard. I was tempted to slug him in the arm. But something in my expression must¡¯ve alerted him to my true distress, because he calmed himself and shook his head. ¡°You¡¯re not going to break the baby, Felicity. Here. Put your arms out like you¡¯re already holding one, and I¡¯ll slip her into place.¡±

 Page 28

    I sent him an untrusting scowl.

    He nodded patiently, encouraging me. ¡°Trust me.¡±

    With a heavy sigh, I fashioned my arms to hold an imaginary infant, instantly feeling like an idiot. If he was spoofing me¡ª

    But Knox slid our niece into my waiting arms seamlessly. I looked down at her and sucked in a breath.

    ¡°Oh, wow.¡± I was holding a baby, Garrett¡¯s redheaded daughter. ¡°She¡¯s so light.¡±

    I glanced up at Knox, and he grinned. ¡°And she¡¯s probably doubled her weight since she was born.¡±

    He seemed so much like a proud father, I caught my breath and gazed at his perfection a couple seconds too long before I cleared my throat and looked down at Bentley again.

    She was adorable, even with her lip puckering and her tiny face turning red.

    A grumbly, baby complaint rumbled from her, and I panicked.

    ¡°Oh, no. What¡¯s wrong?¡± I turned to Knox for help, but he didn¡¯t seem too concerned.

    ¡°Could be any number of things. Hungry, tired, gassy, uncomfortable. Try swaying with her back and forth. She seems to like movement.¡±

    So, I started to sway, but Knox laughed and held up a hand. ¡°Not quite so fast. Nice, gentle, soothing.¡± He swayed back and forth himself to show me what he meant, so I followed his lead. I watched him as he watched me. Seconds later, his lips curved with approval. ¡°There you go. Perfect.¡± His tone matched our back and forth movement. Druggingly peaceful.

    I finally dug up the courage to look back down at the settled infant and grinned. Yeah. There. She did seem better.

    Until I spoke. ¡°You are just so dang cute. Yes, you are.¡± I went in to rub my nose against hers, and...wrong move.

    Bentley burst out wailing. I shoved her at Knox, unable to deal, and he fumbled to catch her.

    ¡°Sorry, sorry,¡± I burst out. Once she was safely in his arms but still wailing, I hugged myself self-consciously. ¡°I told you I¡¯d break her.¡±

    ¡°She¡¯s fine.¡± He rolled his eyes, talking to her in a soft voice, and did the swaying thing as he plunked his knuckle into her mouth until she finally settled again.

    ¡°Okay, you have a talent,¡± I had to admit.

    He glanced up. ¡°I¡¯ve had practice. It comes with the territory when you¡¯re the oldest of six.¡±

    I felt like a big phony for being the youngest of three.

    ¡°Is she basically a happy baby?¡± I asked.

    ¡°I guess. I don¡¯t know. She has her moments. Mercy can lose her patience pretty easily. Usually someone else will step in and help out, but there¡¯s been a few times they¡¯ve just cried at each other for a while. But living in a house that size with eight other people, you gotta expect some tense moments.¡±

    ¡°I bet,¡± I murmured, trying to imagine what his life was like. I lived with four other people in a huge sprawling mansion¡ªsometimes I wouldn¡¯t see some family members for days¡ªand it could still get tense in our home. Being smashed together with them, so we were right in each other¡¯s faces day in and day out, would be... I didn¡¯t even know. I shook my head. ¡°I bet it gets pretty hectic.¡±

    Knox leaned toward me and lowered his voice. ¡°Want to know a secret?¡±

    I nodded, unable to look anywhere but into his eyes.

    He grinned. ¡°I escape a lot.¡± Then the grin faltered. ¡°Sometimes I dream of the day I don¡¯t ever have to go back there. But then, there will be a month that the only way we get the bills paid is because of the extra I helped bring in with my job. And I feel shitty for even thinking about escaping.¡±

    I didn¡¯t know how to answer. I felt awful for him...until an idea struck.

    ¡°You could sue.¡±

    He glanced at me, squinting his confusion.

    So I waved a hand, trying to clarify. ¡°My family, I mean. Garrett. For child support.¡±

    When he arched an eyebrow, I blushed and glanced away, guilty for suggesting such a traitorous thing against my own family. But seriously, we had the money, and Bentley was one of us. It only seemed right that my niece get all the support she could.

    Knox sighed and looked down at the girl in his arms. ¡°I know,¡± he finally admitted. ¡°But my dad¡¯s too lazy, too drunk.¡± He shrugged. ¡°Too stupid. I was a little surprised he¡¯d even had the verve to storm the Bainbridge house before Bentley was born. But that will be all he ever accomplishes over that. Mercy¡¯s all bitch and moan, but never act. She¡¯ll never do anything about it, either. And my mom...she¡¯d rather go broke than accept anything from a Bainbridge.¡± Glancing at me, he winced. ¡°No offense, but I¡¯m with her on that score.¡±

 Page 29

    I didn¡¯t know what to say. Instinctively, I wanted to reassure him that I wasn¡¯t offended, but I kind of was. It wasn¡¯t like Bainbridge money was dirty or anything. Then again, I guess I understood the pride part of it. Still, his answer left a tense lull in the air.

    When a sound came from Bentley, we both looked down as if eager for a diversion. Her eyes were closed as she shifted in her sleep and turned her face toward the warmth of Knox¡¯s chest...lucky girl.

    ¡°Is she...¡± I wrinkled my nose. ¡°Is she snoring?¡±

    He chuckled. ¡°I think so.¡± He sent me a curious look. ¡°You want to hold her again? While she¡¯s sleeping like this.¡±

    I immediately shook my head, still too intimidated by the ten-pound kid.

    ¡°No, that¡¯s okay. I¡¯ll just...I¡¯m fine with watching you hold her.¡±

    The way he looked at me made me realize how I¡¯d just announced I wanted to watch him. My face flamed hot. But he only grinned.

    ¡°Okay, then.¡± Backing up a few steps until he had his back to the tree, he lowered himself to his haunches and then sat on the ground. Then he resituated the baby on his shoulder and heaved out a relaxed sigh as he closed his eyes.

    He made it look so inviting I eased down a few feet away, facing him. After resting my hands on my crossed knees and letting out my own deep breath, I bit my lip, realizing there was really no more reason for me to sit here, watching Knox Parker hold a sleeping baby. I¡¯d come to meet Bentley, interact with my niece, not drool over some cute boy.

    But nothing was going to make me leave just yet.

    Needing to speak before I imploded from the overwhelming effects of girl-crushing-in-the-presence-of-a-hot-guy anxiety, I blurted, ¡°It¡¯s really nice and peaceful out here, isn¡¯t it?¡±

    Knox didn¡¯t open his eyes, but he did smile, which was...oh my God, absolutely beautiful.

    ¡°This is my favorite place on earth.¡±

    Mine too.

    I might have sighed.

    His eyes came open. Crap, I hope he hadn¡¯t heard that. Uncrossing my legs, I pulled them together and bent them up to my chest, hugging them and hiding as much of myself as possible.

    ¡°So, uh...¡± I glanced around the quiet forest, where I couldn¡¯t even spot a squirrel to talk about. ¡°What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?¡± When Knox snorted, I glanced at him and frowned. ¡°What?¡±

    He shook his head. ¡°You¡¯re not getting me this time. Ducks don¡¯t buy lipstick.¡±

    One of my legs escaped my arm hug and straightened so I could reach it out and nudge his foot with mine. ¡°Come on. Just play along.¡±

    ¡°No way.¡± He laughed and shook his head. ¡°I¡¯m not falling for that again. If mutes don¡¯t talk, then ducks don¡¯t wear freaking lipstick.¡±

    ¡°Okay, fine.¡± I sighed dramatically, even though I kind of loved that he was talking to me...even if it was about duck lipstick. ¡°Theoretically, if a duck were to wear lipstick and have the ability to speak, what do you think it¡¯d say if it ever bought lipstick?¡±

    His mouth opened, but no words came. A thoughtful frown creased his brow before he slumped his shoulders and shook his head. ¡°I give up. What would a duck say?¡±

    I let a dramatic second of silence follow his question before I answered, ¡°Put it on my bill.¡±

    Knox stared at me, squinting slightly before he closed his eyes, bowed his head and sighed. ¡°Seriously, Bainbridge? That¡¯s awful. It¡¯s even cheesier than the mute-midget joke.¡±

    ¡°It is not!¡± Okay, it might¡¯ve been. But my gut instinct to disagree with him flared to life, because I really liked to argue-banter with Knox Parker.

    ¡°Someone needs to teach you some good and dirty, lewd jokes.¡±

    I rolled my eyes. ¡°Why do you think dirty jokes are so much better than nice, safe, clean ones?¡±

    His grin was pure, smoking hot, mischievous bad boy. ¡°Because...everything¡¯s better when it¡¯s dirty.¡±

    Feeling the urge to fan my face and sigh while melting into a puddle of raging hormones, I gulped down my initial reaction and gripped my knees tighter to my chest.

    ¡°Fine,¡± I said, trying to sound airy and all whatever, even though my voice was a little too high to accomplish such a feat. ¡°I¡¯ll never bother you with my completely appropriate, clean jokes ever again, then.¡±

    ¡°Oh, don¡¯t be that way,¡± he chided through a grin. ¡°You know I was just kidding.¡± It was his turn to nudge my sandals with his ratted sneaker. ¡°Come on. Hit me with another. I swear, I won¡¯t bash this one.¡±

 Page 30

    ¡°Nope. Not falling for it.¡±

    ¡°But you never know.¡± His voice was charming, cajoling, and oh so tempting. ¡°It could be my newest favorite joke of all time.¡±

    I snorted.

    ¡°Please.¡± He added an eyelash-batting grin to the begging, which okay, really made me want to give in.

    But I held firm, though I had no idea why, and I lifted my chin stubbornly. ¡°Never again.¡±

    ¡°Felicity,¡± he scolded. ¡°Tell me a damn joke.¡±

    ¡°Uh-uh.¡± Finding my fingernails suddenly the most interesting things I¡¯d ever inspected, I examined them, looking for chips and dirt. ¡°So, what do you want to be when you grow up?¡± I asked, totally flipping the conversation around so I wouldn¡¯t end up giving in to him with one of my subpar anecdotes.

    Unable to change gears so quickly, he sent me a startled glance before crinkling his eyebrows. ¡°Huh?¡±

    I shrugged. ¡°I¡¯m just curious. Where do you see yourself in ten years?¡±

    Blurting out a laugh, he shook his head. ¡°What is this? Some kind of job interview?¡± Then he arched an eyebrow and cocked me a sideways glance. ¡°Where do you see yourself in ten years, Miss Bainbridge?¡±

    I rested my chin on my knees. ¡°In college.¡±

    ¡°At twenty-five?¡± he sputtered. ¡°Holy shit, what do you plan on becoming? A freaking doctor?¡±

    ¡°Actually, yes. But not a medical doctor. And don¡¯t cuss in front of my niece, please.¡±

    ¡°Pfft.¡± He snorted and shook his head, even though a grin lingered around his lips. ¡°You think that was bad? You should hear the crap Mercy spews at Bentley to her face. This kid has no chance of not having a potty mouth.¡±

    I started to tell him he still didn¡¯t need to be part of the problem, but he went and added, ¡°And what kind of doctor isn¡¯t a medical doctor?¡±

    I shrugged. ¡°A psychological one.¡±

    ¡°A psych....¡± He pulled his head back as if surprised. When Bentley stirred in her sleep, he glanced down and shifted her until she was resting her cheek on his shoulder. Patting her back gently and swaying back and forth, he returned his attention to me. ¡°You want to be a psychologist?¡±

    I nodded and bit my bottom lip. ¡°Yeah. I do. A child psychologist.¡±

    ¡°Wow,¡± he murmured, and he actually sounded impressed, which warmed a little spot in my heart. ¡°That¡¯s just...I don¡¯t know. Wow.¡± When he shook his head, more bewildered than impressed, I frowned.

    ¡°What?¡± Gnawing on my lip, I watched him intently.

    ¡°Nothing. It¡¯s just. It¡¯s so...random. And yet specific. You don¡¯t see a lot of fifteen-year-olds deciding something quite like that.¡±

    ¡°Almost sixteen,¡± I automatically corrected.

    He sent me a dry glance. ¡°Same fucking difference,¡± he argued, only to quickly revise, ¡°Same freaking difference. Sorry.¡± When he glanced down at the sleeping baby, something warm passed through me.

    He¡¯d watched his language...for me.

    I loved that.

    ¡°It¡¯s just...¡± He shrugged before adding, ¡°I can¡¯t see anyone so young wanting to be something like that, just out of the blue, unless you actually know a child psychologist.¡±

    When I blushed, his brown eyes widened. ¡°Holy shit, you do? You¡¯ve been to a psychologist?¡±

    ¡°Hey!¡± I picked up a handful of dirt and acorns and twigs at my side and tossed them at him, making sure they sprinkled over his pant legs and went nowhere near our niece. ¡°It¡¯s not something to be ashamed of. But, no, I haven¡¯t.¡± I threw more fallen acorns at him. ¡°Why would you automatically assume I¡¯m mentally unstable?¡±

    He ducked his face protectively and gave a soft laugh, even though the second round also only pelted him from the knees down. ¡°I didn¡¯t say there was anything wrong with it. And I never once thought anything was mentally wrong with you, except maybe your inability to tell a good joke.¡±

    I rolled my eyes. ¡°Hardy, har har.¡±

    Knox snickered but just as quickly fell serious again. ¡°I just...you know, sometimes people experience traumatic things when they¡¯re young, and they need help dealing with them, which made me wonder if...you had.¡±

    The way he watched me felt like a dissection, like he was prying his way into my brain, looking for my deepest darkest secrets...looking for trauma.

    ¡°Well, I¡¯m sorry to disappoint you,¡± I said. ¡°But I never experienced any traumatic events. I¡¯ve led a very boring childhood.¡± A very boring, spoiled and elite, yet ignored-by-my-parents childhood.

 Page 31

    His shoulders fell an inch. Then he nodded and gave a very serious murmur. ¡°Good.¡±

    An unexpected thrill raced through me. He¡¯d been worried about me. I loved that, too.

    Clearing my throat, I glanced away. ¡°My aunt¡¯s a child psychologist,¡± I explained.

    He nodded and kept watching me but didn¡¯t respond, so I felt compelled to talk more. ¡°I adore her. She¡¯s just...she¡¯s so awesome. And she¡¯s never tried to psychoanalyze me, or whatever, but there have been things she¡¯s said here and there over the years that¡¯s always made me feel better. It¡¯s just like she...gets my predicament, or something.¡±

    ¡°Your predicament?¡± he started, only for his gaze to clear with understanding. ¡°Oh, you mean the misfit thing?¡±

    My face heated as I glanced away, uncomfortable with this track. ¡°Yeah. I guess.¡±

    But Knox only nodded, no censure or judgment in his gaze. ¡°I take it she¡¯s not a snob like the rest of the Bainbridge clan.¡± When I sent him a scowl, he shrugged. ¡°What? You still haven¡¯t convinced me to like anyone else in your family, except maybe Aunt...¡±

    ¡°Cynthia,¡± I provided. ¡°Except she¡¯s not a Bainbridge. She¡¯s my mom¡¯s older sister on the Worthington side.¡±

    ¡°Holy shit,¡± he squawked, his mouth falling open. ¡°Your mom¡¯s a Worthington? And your dad¡¯s a Bainbridge. Jesus, I don¡¯t stand a chance, do I?¡±

    Heat flooded my belly. I didn¡¯t mean to ask, but my mouth formed the words, anyway. ¡°Stand a chance at what?¡±

    He froze, looking caught, before glancing away and muttering, ¡°Measuring up.¡±

    All the air inside me vacated my lungs in a rush. I was so bamboozled by his answer I just gaped at him for a good minute.

    But, seriously...what?

    Why would he in any way feel the need to measure up to me? He was the super-hot, super-sweet, super-amazing older boy who took my breath away with a mere glance. I was the one who felt all insignificant, inexperienced, and...cheesy.

    But there was this flicker of uncertainty in his eyes as he checked on Bentley, swallowing so hard the muscles in his throat seemed to trip over a bundle of nerves.

    Needing him to know immediately that he had nothing whatsoever to worry about in that department, I cleared my bone-dry throat. ¡°I think the worth of a person comes more from who you are and less from what you are.¡±

    Knox glanced at me. His brown eyes were hooded and dark before he shook his head. ¡°Yeah,¡± he said, smiling softly. ¡°You¡¯ll do just fine as a child psychologist.¡±

    There was never anything so impossible as trying to pee when someone stepped into the bathroom stall next to yours.

    I probably should¡¯ve waited until I got home to do this instead of dashing into the store¡¯s bathroom for immediate answers as soon as I made my purchase. But then I remembered, oh right, going home currently wasn¡¯t an option. Damn.

    Biting my lip, I closed my eyes and tipped my face toward the ceiling. Come on. Come on. Niagara Falls. Atlantic Ocean. Rushing streams. Water parks and flooding canals.

    Pee already!

    The lady next door finished her business and flushed. As the pipes drained, I finally felt a trickle. I rushed to aim the stick under me, hoping I was hitting my target. But this was even more challenging than pissing in a cup at the doctor¡¯s office. Inability to aim pee sucked ass.

    Suddenly I resented men even more than I had ten seconds ago.

    Lucky bastards.

    Lucky cheating bastards who could aim their pee.

    Outside my stall, the other woman began to wash her hands. After I finished and flushed, I pulled up my pants and then waited, sitting, refusing to even look down at the test in my hand.

    Please be negative, please be negative, I silently begged.

    With no idea what I¡¯d do if the result came out with a plus sign on the stick, I hesitantly lowered my face and looked.

    ¡°Oh my God,¡± I wheezed, as the door to the ladies¡¯ room came open again, admitting a new full-bladdered woman. ¡°Oh, thank you, God.¡±

    When I stumbled out of my stall seconds later¡ªpossibly looking a might crazy-eyed¡ªthe woman was still frozen just inside the doorway, her eyes wide with her purse clutched close.

    I blasted her with a smile I couldn¡¯t stop. ¡°Hi! Beautiful day, isn¡¯t it?¡±

    Then I laughed¡ªone of those maniacal, uncontrollable laughs¡ªbecause up until now, it¡¯d been a pretty shitty, miserable day for me.

    The woman blinked and then darted into a stall, probably to escape the insane woman she was trapped in a public bathroom with.

 Page 32

    I shrugged and washed my hands. My legs were still shaking with relief as I exited the store and crawled into my beat-up old junker of a tin can car. But when I started the engine, I just sat there, realizing I had nowhere to go. As of half an hour ago, I was officially homeless.

    Well, that sucked.

    All the joy and elation I¡¯d felt in the bathroom began to ebb. Then the fresh memory of catching my boyfriend¡ªoh right, ex-boyfriend¡ªscrewing one of his coworkers doggie style on my kitchen table half an hour ago obliterated all my happy thoughts completely.

    My shoulders slumped, depression crept in, and my chest went tight as my throat dried up like I was about to¡ª

    Crap! I was going to cry.

    No, I absolutely, unequivocally refused to cry over this.

    Oh God, I needed reinforcements before I turned into a freaking watering pot.

    I had friends. I should call one of them. But when I dug my phone out of my purse, I realized the battery had died...and my phone charger was still at my former residence where I had lived up until half an hour ago with my ex-boyfriend, and I was only returning there after hell froze over. Twice.

    I blew out a long breath, forcing my body to relax.

    I could do this. I could handle whatever happened next. My life had been at worse places than this, and I¡¯d survived then. I could surely survive this little hiccup.

    Somewhat revitalized by my mini-pep-thought, I put the car into gear and drove to the first house that sprang to mind.

    It was located in a nice, peaceful, modest neighborhood. The branches of the trees lining the street swayed lightly in the autumn breeze, making me miss my childhood woods.

    But I hadn¡¯t entered them in six years, and I knew if I ever did, the memories would no doubt slay me. So I tore my attention from the flaming red maples, pushed from my car, and made my way up the front walk until I was on a covered porch and ringing a doorbell.

    The ten-year old who answered immediately yelled, ¡°Zombie attack,¡± when he saw me. Then he ran off, screaming.

    On any other day, I would¡¯ve chased after him, croaking ¡°Brains,¡± with my arms outstretched and my head canted to the side, but today, I just couldn¡¯t get with the program.

    So I stood there, by myself, in the opened front door, pathetic and a little mangled, if not completely broken.

    ¡°Colton, who¡¯s at the¡ª¡± A brunette popped her head into the living room to see me still hanging out in the entrance. ¡°Oh! Felicity. Hi, come on in. What¡¯s up?¡±

    I took a deep breath and stepped into the house. ¡°Hey, Aspen.¡± I gave her a friendly wave and then a forced smile as I closed the door behind me. ¡°You have any time for some girl talk?¡±

    ¡°For you? Of course. Follow me back to the kitchen. I¡¯m trying to make homemade noodles for chicken noodle soup. The guys always go gaga whenever I make anything homemade, and I get a kick out of their exaggerated reactions, so it¡¯s become kind of an addiction of mine to cook up new surprises for them. Can I get you anything to drink?¡± she asked as we entered the brightly lit room.

    ¡°Oh my God, yes.¡± Nothing sounded as good as alcohol right now.

    ¡°Iced tea?¡± she asked, making me frown.

    ¡°You mean, Long Island Iced Tea, right?¡± I corrected¡ªpleaded, really¡ªas I slumped into a chair at the table and rested my face in my hands.

    She glanced back at me and lifted an eyebrow. ¡°Ah, so this is going to be one those talks, huh?¡±

    I sighed and closed my weary eyes. ¡°Unfortunately yes.¡±

    The sounds of cabinet doors opening and ice in a glass were like music to my ears. When Aspen sat across from me and slid a cup my way, I sat up and took a fortifying breath. After a long, deep drink that made my eyes water, I let out a refreshed sigh and sent Aspen my most sincere look of gratitude.

    ¡°Thank you. You¡¯re amazing. I love you.¡±

    She blushed and waved away my gushing praise. ¡°Just talk. I¡¯m dying of curiosity over here. What happened?¡±

    ¡°Right.¡± I cleared my throat and stiffened my back. ¡°So, I walked into my apartment about an hour ago, only to interrupt Cam screwing some other girl.¡±

    Aspen gasped and slapped her hands over her mouth. ¡°No.¡±

    I nodded. ¡°Oh, yes.¡± Gifting her with one of my overly forced smiles, I added, ¡°And when I confronted them, I discovered he was actually ready to dump me and have her move in...without discussing it with me first. In fact, her clothes were already hanging in my closet.¡± After a bitter laugh, I asked, ¡°What a way to break it to a girl easy, huh?¡±

    ¡°I can¡¯t...this is just... He seriously cheated on you?¡± Aspen blinked before asking, ¡°Is he stupid or something?¡±

 Page 33

    I laughed. ¡°Bless you.¡± The chuckle actually felt good. I was relieved for the break in my agony. ¡°I needed that.¡±

    ¡°No, really.¡± Aspen just kept frowning. ¡°How could he not realize how awesome you are? How could he...and then just move on with someone else without talking to you first? Oh, wait. Is the apartment leased in your name or did you move in with him? Maybe¡ª¡±

    My shoulders buckled from the burden piling on them. ¡°I moved in with him about six months ago, and he¡¯d been living there for over a year. The lease and everything is in his name.¡±

    ¡°But haven¡¯t you been paying the rent for the past¡ª¡±

    ¡°Four months? Yeah. Pretty much.¡± Stupid, idiotic, naive me.

    Aspen shook her head. ¡°I still can¡¯t believe he just... That bastard.¡±

    It did my heart good, seeing her upset on my behalf, and that kind of cheered me up a little more.

    ¡°Yup.¡± I nodded, totally agreeing. ¡°But the good news in all this is that I¡¯m not pregnant like I kind of feared I was.¡±

    ¡°Say what?¡±

    Leaning in toward her, I confessed, ¡°I¡¯m late, but I think it¡¯s just stress or I-don¡¯t-know because I sensed something was going on with him lately. But this is the second test I¡¯ve taken in two days, and they¡¯ve both been negative, so whew, huh? Dodged a bullet there.¡±

    Aspen shook her head, gazing at me with something akin to awe, which was weird because I didn¡¯t think I could be any more pathetic than I was in this moment.

    ¡°You amaze me,¡± she said. ¡°I don¡¯t know how you can still smile and be so upbeat at a time like this.¡±

    The grin on my face went a little stiff as a memory assailed me.

    Make me a promise, a voice from my past whispered through my head. Suddenly, I was sixteen again and he was gripping my face, begging me with desperate brown eyes. No matter what happens today, don¡¯t ever change. You are fun and sweet and amazing just the way you are. You make the world a better place because you always find the bright side. You ARE the bright side. And if I¡¯m ever going to make it through this, I need to know you¡¯re out there, still glowing and making the world bright.

    I wiped my hands over my face and coughed through a tickle in my throat. ¡°Well...¡± I shrugged and met Aspen¡¯s gaze before I had to look away. ¡°You know, it wasn¡¯t like Cam was the great love of my life.¡±

    He certainly hadn¡¯t been...

    Knox.

    I blew out a breath and sent Aspen another one of my fake smiles. Her brow crinkled with worry. ¡°So you just stayed with him all these months, living with him and letting him mooch off you because...?¡±

    My gaze fell as my shoulders slumped with shame. ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± I mumbled, drawing a line through the condensation of my Long Island Iced Tea glass with my finger. ¡°Loneliness, maybe. Something to do.¡± My chest went tight. ¡°Sometimes you just go with a situation because there¡¯s nothing better for you. So you just...¡±

    ¡°Settle?¡± Aspen guessed softly.

    I frowned, guilt niggling at me. ¡°Well, now I feel like a total bitch, like I used poor Cam just to pass the time.¡±

    ¡°No, I know you didn¡¯t. I mean, you supported him while he was out of work, feeding him and housing him and paying his car payment when you could barely afford all that for yourself. And you practically got him that new job. You defended him every time Noel talked trash about him, and¡ª¡±

    ¡°Well, it turns out your hubby was right. Cam was a lousy boyfriend.¡± I gasped and looked at her as a sudden thought struck. ¡°Or maybe he just knew. Maybe he knew I couldn¡¯t love him, and...and that¡¯s what drove him away.¡±

    Aspen rolled her eyes. ¡°If that were the case, then he should¡¯ve talked to you about it, not found someone else behind your back while he was still with you. You are not to blame for what that asshole did today.¡±

    ¡°But¡ª¡±

    ¡°Listen to me, and listen good.¡± Reaching across the table, Aspen grasped both of my hands in both of hers. ¡°You did not deserve to be treated that way. And Cam was a complete idiot for not appreciating how beautiful, smart, charming, loyal, and lovely you are. If he thought your feelings for him needed to be stronger, he should¡¯ve tried harder to win your heart over instead of turning to the first willing slut to open her legs for him. Because you are worth fighting for, damn it.¡±

    ¡°Wow,¡± I murmured, shaking my head. ¡°If you weren¡¯t already married, I would so turn lesbian right now to chase after you.¡±

 Page 34

    Aspen snorted, then blushed for making the sound. Pulling her hands from mine, she covered her mouth with them and laughed outright. ¡°Well...thank you.¡±

    I smiled because she was so freaking adorable. ¡°Have I told you how glad I am that Noel introduced us?¡±

    She dropped her hands from her rosy cheeks and smiled back. ¡°So am I.¡±

    Remembering the first few weeks I¡¯d known Noel Gamble, I shook my head. ¡°At first, I thought he was a creepy cheater who didn¡¯t even bother to hide his wedding ring because every time he saw me reading on my break, he became overly interested, asking me all kinds of oddball questions about whatever story I was on.¡±

    Aspen let out a delighted smile. ¡°The first day he met you, he came home that night and told me about the new waitress working at Forbidden. ¡®I think you¡¯ll like her,¡¯ he said. And all he added was, ¡®she reads.¡¯ So I told him that meant nothing. We could have totally different taste in books.¡±

    ¡°Well, he definitely made it a point to find out exactly what stories I liked most.¡±

    With a laugh, Aspen pushed back from the table and stood before moving to the cabinets where she already had dough rolled out on the counter. As she started to cut it into strings, she said, ¡°I told him one time¡ªjust one time¡ªthat I¡¯d always wanted a friend, you know, like a girl friend I could shop with, or go to the salon and gossip with, maybe chat about books with. I had no idea he¡¯d make it his new life mission to find me one.¡±

    I nodded. ¡°That explains why he once asked me what my favorite stores were and where I liked to get my hair done.¡±

    Aspen dropped the knife on the counter and whirled to face me, her mouth hanging open. ¡°He did not.¡±

    ¡°He so did.¡± When she merely blinked, I said, ¡°I think it¡¯s adorable that he started vetting women he met, testing whether they were good enough to make friends with his woman, just because she wanted one.¡±

    ¡°He¡¯s definitely something,¡± she murmured as if ready to scold him, except something sparkling in her eyes told me how honored she really was by what he¡¯d done.

    ¡°He loves you,¡± I said, feeling an ache rise from the pit of my stomach. ¡°A lot.¡±

    Aspen heard the yearning in my voice and smiled sadly. ¡°Yeah,¡± she said, right before adding, ¡°You¡¯ll find that someday. You¡¯re too amazing not to.¡±

    I already have, I didn¡¯t tell her.

    I was kind of tempted to spill my great love story. I¡¯d never told her about my summer six years before. I¡¯d never told anyone. But Aspen Gamble really had become the best girl friend I¡¯d ever had in the past few months, and if I were to confide in anyone, it would be her.

    But something held me back. It probably wasn¡¯t very tactful to mourn over one guy when you¡¯d just been dumped by another.

    Any other promises? I¡¯d asked him that day, the last time I¡¯d seen him before the sheriff had dragged him out of my life in handcuffs and I¡¯d never heard from him again.

    Yeah, he¡¯d said, grasping a piece of my hair and winding it around his finger. Though fear lingered in his eyes and his lips trembled with apprehension, he¡¯d grinned at me. Don¡¯t ever cut your hair short.

    I¡¯d wanted him to ask me to wait for him. I planned on it anyway, but he¡¯d wanted to be cute and try to say something to make me smile. I¡¯d burst into tears instead, and my father and the sheriff had walked into the office where they¡¯d had Knox tied up and restrained.

    I have no idea what happened to him after that. Father had made Max and Garrett drag me weeping from the room.

    Fingering my hair, I grew suddenly mad. Why was I still keeping my hair long for him? I¡¯d stopped waiting for him two years ago, when he should¡¯ve gotten out of prison. He¡¯d made his own bed when he¡¯d done what he¡¯d done. So why was I still granting him this one last request? Why was I not even trying to fall in love with other men like Cam? Well, maybe not cheater men like Cam, but awesome, deserving men.

    ¡°Speaking of salons, I want to get a haircut,¡± I announced. ¡°Like chop it all off. Make it super short.¡±

    ¡°Oh, but you have the most beautiful¡ª¡± Something in my expression must¡¯ve alerted Aspen not to finish her sentence. She tactfully cleared her throat. ¡°Sure, whatever you want, Felicity. You know I¡¯ll support any decision you make.¡±

    I dropped my hand from my hair, feeling more defeated than before. ¡°But I should probably find a place to stay for the night first.¡±

    Man, my priorities were out of whack. I was such a mess.

 Page 35

    ¡°You¡¯ll stay here, of course.¡±

    Not expecting her offer, I gasped. Aspen and Noel were already housing his two younger brothers. They didn¡¯t need to take on anyone else. ¡°Oh...no. I couldn¡¯t. Aspen, you know I didn¡¯t come here looking for a handout or a couch to sleep on. I¡ª¡±

    ¡°Of course, I know that. And we won¡¯t make you sleep on the couch. We¡¯ll bunk you in Brandt¡¯s room.¡±

    ¡°But¡ª¡± Uncomfortable about any kind of gift or charity, I did a quick mental calculation in my head, trying to figure out how much money I had available to spend on a motel room¡­for multiple nights. And that would be zero dollars and maybe, oh, about thirty-eight cents, give or take¡ªmostly take¡ªa hundred bucks or so.

    Damn.

    Before I could protest, though, the back door came flying open and Aspen¡¯s husband swept into the kitchen, all six-foot-four sexy inches of him.

    My best friend was such a lucky shit.

    ¡°Hey,¡± he started to greet her with a seductive grin before he noticed me.

    After doing a quick double take to make sure, yes, I was really here, I swear disappointment glittered in his eyes. But at least he gave me a friendly enough greeting. ¡°Hi, Felicity. What¡¯re you¡ª¡±

    His attention was deterred when he noticed Aspen¡¯s noodle project taking place on the cabinet counters. ¡°What¡¯s that?¡±

    When he tried to glance around her to get a look, she dodged into his path, blocking his view. ¡°Nothing.¡±

    Noel¡¯s gaze sprang to hers only for a slow smile to spread across his face. ¡°You¡¯re cooking something new again.¡±

    She snorted. ¡°No.¡±

    But his grin only widened. And someone hand me a fan please, because Noel Gamble sure had a hormone-sizzling smile.

    Aspen sighed and ground her teeth. ¡°It won¡¯t be ready until tomorrow. The noodles take a day to dry out.¡±

    ¡°Noodles?¡± Her husband cocked a curious eyebrow. ¡°As in...?¡±

    ¡°Chicken and noodles,¡± she grumbled, obviously reluctant to break the surprise.

    ¡°Chicken and...noodles.¡± He whimpered, and I swear he was half a breath from coming in his jeans...jeans that looked really good on him from the side view I had at the table.

    Gripping Aspen¡¯s arms, Noel backed her into a cabinet. ¡°Have I told you how much I love you lately?¡±

    She glowed, not that I blamed her. I was tingling over here myself from just watching his sexy manhandling.

    Biting her lip, she answered, ¡°A couple times this morning.¡±

    Noel tsked and shook his head. ¡°That¡¯s not nearly enough.¡±

    When he kissed her, I glanced away, sighing, as the misery of the day once again took its toll on me.

    ¡°I want to take you on this counter right now, get you all covered with flour, and¡ª¡±

    ¡°Um, hey!¡± I waved my hand and glared irritably. ¡°I¡¯m still here.¡±

    Aspen gasped and jerked out of Noel¡¯s arms, flushing bright red as she covered her swollen, well-kissed lips. ¡°Sorry.¡±

    Noel didn¡¯t look so apologetic. He scowled at the interruption and folded his arms across his bulging chest before resting his back against the counter and asking, ¡°So, what¡¯s up with you today, Bainbridge? Come over for baby details?¡±

    Wait, what? I frowned. ¡°Baby details?¡±

    Was Aspen expecting?

    ¡°Oh, crap. I totally forgot!¡± She slapped a hand to her brow as she cringed. ¡°Zoey went into labor today.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± I sprang from my seat, instantly alarmed. ¡°Isn¡¯t she, like, way early? Too early to be having a baby yet?¡±

    Noel shrugged. ¡°She did anyway. She went into labor and had it earlier today. The baby¡¯s in NICU, but basically doing okay. I just got back from visiting them at the hospital.¡±

    ¡°How¡¯s she doing?¡± Aspen asked, rubbing Noel¡¯s arm. ¡°Did you get to see the baby?¡±

    ¡°Through a window, but that was it. Zoey was worn out but still had enough energy to smile when we invaded her room. We decided to let her rest so we didn¡¯t stay long.¡±

    ¡°Whew.¡± I swiped my hand over my brow and sank back into my seat. ¡°Thank goodness they¡¯re both okay. It was supposed to be a boy, right?¡±

    Noel nodded. ¡°J.B. And he has a head full of dark hair like his daddy.¡±

    Aspen patted his shoulder. ¡°Tell her about the mysterious hero.¡±

    I glanced between them. ¡°The what?¡±

    ¡°Ten told me some Good Samaritan drove Zoey to the hospital.¡±

 Page 36

    ¡°Huh?¡±

    ¡°After she went into labor, Zoey tried to drive herself to the hospital or something, I don¡¯t know, but she stopped at some convenience store for help, and some stranger just up and drove her the rest of the way to the hospital. Turns out, Pick actually knew the guy from school, and get this, he¡¯s some kind of fucking ex-con who just got out of prison today.¡±

    My mind instantly traveled to the only person I¡¯d ever really known who¡¯d done any time. And Pick would¡¯ve known him too. But there was no way Noel was talking about Knox. He had a good twenty-eight years left to serve.

    ¡°Isn¡¯t that crazy?¡± Aspen was saying.

    ¡°Hmm?¡± I glanced over and realized both Noel and Aspen were watching me. ¡°Oh! Yeah. Insane.¡±

    Noel sent me an odd look. ¡°So, what¡¯re you doing here today? More book talk?¡±

    ¡°Uh...no.¡± I waved a hand, letting him know my day wasn¡¯t nearly as eventful as his story. ¡°My boyfriend cheated on me, pretty much kicked me out of my apartment, and then moved in his new whore...without informing me of the changes first. That¡¯s all.¡±

    Noel blinked. Then a frown creased his forehead. Finally, he said, ¡°He...what? He cheated on you? Is he fucking stupid?¡±

    Yeah, that question still warmed me from the inside out. ¡°That¡¯s exactly what your wife said.¡±

    ¡°It was,¡± Aspen confirmed.

    Noel grinned at her and reached out to yank her against his chest. ¡°Of course it was. Because you¡¯re the smartest woman I know.¡±

    As they did that kissy-make-babies-with-their-eyes thing again, I groaned. ¡°Still here.¡±

    Noel growled and tore his mouth from Aspen¡¯s but kept his forehead mashed to hers.

    ¡°She¡¯s going to need a place to stay,¡± Aspen started.

    ¡°Hell, yes, she can stay here.¡± Noel glanced at me to announce, ¡°We¡¯ll bunk you in Brandt¡¯s room.¡±

    Again, exactly what Aspen had said. These two were so tuned in to each other it was sickening. A good sickening that made me really jealous and all heart-hurt.

    Before I could refuse their offer, the back door opened again, and this time Noel¡¯s fifteen-year-old brother burst inside with a book bag slung over his shoulder.

    ¡°Wuz up?¡± he greeted the two at the counter, not yet spotting me.

    Noel scowled. ¡°Why are you home so late?¡±

    Brandt merely rolled his eyes. ¡°I was at Sarah¡¯s doing homework. Algebra is kicking my ass, and of course she¡¯s acing it. But the damn girl still wouldn¡¯t let me just copy her answers. I mean, what the hell, right? What¡¯s the point of having a fucking genius for a best friend if she makes you work out every problem by yourself and then gets off on telling you how wrong you got all the answers? Damn braggart.¡±

    ¡°As well she shouldn¡¯t let you cheat off her,¡± Aspen scolded.

    ¡°And how many times have I asked you to watch your language in front of Aspen and her friends,¡± Noel added.

    ¡°Her friends?¡± Brandt lifted an eyebrow and glanced over to finally catch sight of me sitting at the table.

    ¡°Oh, hey, Felicity.¡± He lowered his voice as he swaggered my way. ¡°You look extra beautiful today. How¡¯re you doing?¡±

    ¡°Oh, brother,¡± Noel muttered under his breath.

    ¡°I¡¯m good, thanks.¡± Then I shrugged. ¡°I mean, other than the fact my boyfriend cheated on me, kicked me out of my own apartment, and left me basically homeless.¡±

    His jaw dropped. ¡°Holy shit. Cam cheated on you? Is he fucking stupid?¡±

    God, I loved this family.

    ¡°Yeah, so she gets your room until she can find a new place of her own,¡± Noel announced.

    Brandt frowned at him only to whirl back to me, a huge smile breaking across his face. ¡°Hell, yes, you can sleep in my bed.¡± Then he leaned down to murmur into my ear, ¡°I¡¯m a great cuddler.¡±

    While Aspen laughed, Noel smacked his brother on the back of the head. ¡°You¡¯re getting the couch, moron.¡±

    I couldn¡¯t answer, because honestly¡ªor maybe I should say sadly¡ªBrandt Gamble¡¯s offer of male companionship was the best I¡¯d heard in six long, dry years. Too bad the cutie-pie was complete jailbait. I might¡¯ve actually considered him.

    Needing more to drink because I¡¯d suddenly found myself saddled with a houseful of Gambles, I reached for my now watered-down iced tea and began to guzzle.

    Here was to the rest of my miserable life.

    We met four more times at our tree. Twice, he was late because he couldn¡¯t get away any sooner without rousing suspicion, but he never failed to show eventually, with baby Bentley tucked in his arms.

 Page 37

    By the third meeting, I finally shed my baby-handling nerves and was able to hold Bentley throughout the entire visit. She even whined once and I didn¡¯t freak...er, maybe I should say Knox successfully talked me through the panic.

    We usually gossiped the entire time. He was so incredibly easy to talk to. I think I could tell him anything. I think I did tell him everything. We talked about Bentley, and school, and movies and music, and politics, religion, families, deep topics, frivolous topics, just...everything. If one of us thought of something to say, we said it. I even made his ears bleed with more cheesy jokes, because I suspected he secretly loved them.

    I mean, how could he not like: What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison.

    I so caught him cracking a smile and shaking his head as he sighed after that one.

    Somewhere inside me, I knew I should be more reserved, but there was just something about Knox Parker that had me opening up and sharing all my thoughts and dreams. Despite the fact he was the cutest freaking boy on the planet¡ªwhich normally would¡¯ve bottled me up tighter than a jar of ketchup¡ªI sensed he understood me, all my passions, and insecurities, and thoughts and dreams about life. He became the best friend I¡¯d ever had after only three visits.

    The fourth time, however, he came empty-handed.

    I¡¯d been leaning against the tree, not ready to sit because I was wearing the cutest outfit I owned along with sparkly ballet flats, and I didn¡¯t want to dirty them on the ground just yet¡ªhe had to see me at my best first. Pretending to read from my Kindle while I was actually glancing around for him every two seconds, my breath caught when I heard the crunch of leaves, signaling approaching footsteps.

    I whipped my attention that way, and there he was, strolling through the shadows and the sunlight toward me. I sucked in a breath, freshly awed by how beautiful he was. It took me a second after he jammed his empty hands into his pocket, which lifted his shoulders in a nervous, unsure kind of manner, to realize he came sans baby. I jerked my gaze to his face to find apology in his eyes.

    With my heart lodged in my throat, worried what bad thing he had to say, I tried to crack a joke to ease my own anxieties. Tapping a finger to my chin, I announced, ¡°I can¡¯t help but notice you look different today.¡± Imitating cradling a baby, I added, ¡°No wiggling bundle of blankets in the arm area, maybe.¡±

    ¡°Yeah,¡± he said, a regretful sigh seeping from his lungs as his shoulders slouched. ¡°About that. Apparently Bentley had a doctor¡¯s appointment today I wasn¡¯t aware of. If I¡¯d known, I would¡¯ve told you yesterday so you didn¡¯t have to come all the way out here. I got to feeling so bad knowing you were probably waiting, I thought I¡¯d let you know she wasn¡¯t going to make it.¡±

    ¡°Oh.¡± I think he could hear the disappointment in my voice, which I truly tried to make sound bright and cheerful, because he winced. So, I quickly added, ¡°That¡¯s okay.¡± And it was. My disappointment honestly stemmed not at all from Bentley and totally from the fact I wouldn¡¯t be able to spend the entire afternoon with him again.

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry you came all this way to see her,¡± he started.

    ¡°No, really, it¡¯s fine.¡± I waved him quiet. ¡°But thank you for letting me know. That was...really considerate.¡±

    He opened his mouth to respond but must¡¯ve changed his mind because he just as quickly clamped his lips back together. With his hands still in his pockets, he cleared his throat. ¡°Well...I wanted you to know.¡±

    ¡°Well...¡± I mumbled right back. ¡°Thank you.¡±

    Oh my God, what was going on? We were more nervous and unsure around each other now than the first day he¡¯d run into me. What had happened to us being able to talk about anything?

    When I realized it was Bentley¡¯s fault, I gulped. She¡¯d been the perfect little chaperone. With her always between us, acting as a sort of shield, she¡¯d been a physical buffer that had helped us open up more emotionally.

    But with her gone, leaving us alone, there was nothing between us at all.

    Knox took a step backward. ¡°So, yeah. I guess I¡¯d better get out of your hair.¡±

    I couldn¡¯t hide my disappointment, even though I really, honestly tried. ¡°Okay.¡±

    He stopped in his tracks, and hope lit his gaze. ¡°Unless...¡±

    Perking to attention, I repeated, ¡°Unless?¡±

    ¡°You want to hang out?¡± He shrugged and glanced away, as if it made no difference to him one way or another. Then he went and said, ¡°I don¡¯t have anything else to do until I have to leave for work at five, but if you¡¯re busy, it¡¯s cool. I can¡ª¡±

 Page 38

    ¡°I¡¯m not busy,¡± I rushed to say.

    His gaze slashed to mine, hope once again sparkling in his brown eyes. ¡°You¡¯re not?¡±

    I shook my head. ¡°No. I could hang out.¡±

    ¡°Okay, then.¡± But he seemed to realize he¡¯d been too eager, so he immediately backed off and shrugged again. ¡°I mean, whatever.¡±

    I bit my lip to hide a grin. But then neither of us spoke and neither of us moved; we just stood there, hanging out in complete silence.

    ¡°Do you, uh, do you want to walk?¡± I shrugged self-consciously. ¡°I haven¡¯t ventured out here much. We could explore.¡±

    After a slow nod, he said, ¡°I could walk.¡± His palm came out, extending my way.

    Realizing he wanted to hold hands while we walked, I blew out a trembling breath as I silently commanded myself not to pass out from an overdose of excitement. After a mental fangirl scream, I took his fingers.

    They were warm, and large, and oh-so boy.

    He grinned. ¡°Let¡¯s go this way.¡±

    I nodded, not even paying attention to which way he pointed, because I knew I¡¯d never been that way before. This was as far into the woods as I¡¯d ever gone. Anywhere we went from here would be new to me.

    So, we walked. The tension eased, and I could finally breathe easier.

    He asked me about a show we both liked that had aired a new episode the night before. As we chatted and argued about what we had and hadn¡¯t liked, the sky went darker as the trees started growing closer together, and the ground became mushier without as much sunshine to dry the earth.

    But I really didn¡¯t pay too much attention to what was underfoot while my hand was so perfectly clasped in Knox¡¯s...not until I took a step and lifted my foot, only to realize my ballet flat hadn¡¯t come with me.

    Suddenly finding myself half barefoot, I gasped to a halt, jerking Knox out of step as well.

    ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± he asked immediately, turning back with concern flooding his face.

    I clenched my hand around his so I could keep my balance on one foot. ¡°I just lost my shoe.¡±

    ¡°You...?¡± He frowned before his gaze tracked down to my foot. And then his eyes widened. ¡°Oh shit.¡± Clasping my elbow with his free hand to keep me from falling, he scanned the ground around us before saying, ¡°There it is.¡±

    I glanced back, already wincing because I knew what I¡¯d find. I¡¯d felt the forceful suction of sloppy mud claiming my slipper as soon as I¡¯d lifted my foot. And yep, it was mostly submerged in a marshy puddle.

    ¡°Aww, fuck.¡± When Knox looked back at me, he winced. ¡°I am so sorry, Felicity. I shouldn¡¯t have taken you this way.¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s okay,¡± I instantly assured him. ¡°I¡¯ll just¡ª¡± But oh crap, I had no idea what I¡¯d just do. No way was I going to walk around the woods with only one shoe.

    ¡°I got it.¡± Knox bent past me and reached for my slipper.

    ¡°Oh, you don¡¯t have to¡ª¡±

    But he¡¯d already plucked it from the mud. I gulped as I took in how absolutely covered in sludgy, smelly grime it was. Eww. I did not want to put my foot anywhere near that thing.

    Knox read the disgust off my face and sent me a helpless shrug. ¡°Want me to loan you my shoe?¡±

    The little cut in my breathing was my heart too busy expanding about five sizes larger because I think I fell flat in love with Knox Parker in that very second. I couldn¡¯t believe he was offering to go without a shoe so I¡¯d have one, even though his feet had to be twice as large as mine and I¡¯d probably lose his sneaker faster than I¡¯d lost my ballet flat.

    ¡°Of course not.¡± I sent him an incredulous glance. ¡°I am not making you go barefoot, you crazy loon. Just...¡± I reached for my ballet mud flat. ¡°Hand me my¡ª¡±

    ¡°No, don¡¯t,¡± he warned softly, holding my shoe out away from me. ¡°My hand¡¯s already dirty. Let me.¡± When he knelt in front of me and murmured, ¡°Put your hand on my shoulder,¡± I have no idea how I remained upright and didn¡¯t melt into a puddle in front of him, or at the very least, shout out my undying love.

    Gulping hard, I set my hand gingerly on his solid shoulder. Wet mud encased my foot as he slid the slipper on, but all I felt was the amazingly supportive shoulder and the brush of his hair against my bare knee as he bent over my foot. When he looked up from where he was still kneeling in front of me, I lost myself in his brown eyes.

    ¡°Thank you,¡± I think I said.

    He grinned and straightened as he wiped his dirty fingers on the leg of his pants. ¡°No problem.¡± Then he hitched his chin toward a different direction. ¡°But maybe we should go this way now.¡±

 Page 39

    ¡°Okay,¡± I murmured, still caught in my I-think-I-love-this-boy daze. We could go any direction he liked.

    He clasped my hand again and off we went. The squishy sound of mud gushing between my toes with every step notwithstanding, this was turning out to be the best afternoon walk of my life.

    A minute later, Knox finally broke the silence between us by chuckling and shaking his head. ¡°Seriously, what in the world were you thinking to wear such flimsy shoes into the woods?¡±

    I flushed hard and hot. I¡¯d been thinking I¡¯d wanted to impress him with my girlishness. But I¡¯d only shown him how senseless and impractical I was.

    ¡°I can¡¯t believe you were raised right next to these woods. You act like such a city girl.¡±

    That felt like an insult, so I scowled. ¡°I do not.¡±

    His chuckle only grew louder as he paused and took the time to help me step over a log I definitely could¡¯ve stepped over myself.

    With another irritable frown, I yanked my hand from his and leapt the log all on my own. ¡°This is the first summer I¡¯ve ever really come out here. Excuse me for not knowing there was a freaking swamp around.¡±

    When I took another step on my own, my muddy shoe stuck to something I¡¯d stepped in and it once again came off without me. Without the support of his hand in mine, I began to tumble to the ground, but he caught my elbow.

    As he helped me upright and then back into my shoe again, he winked. ¡°Well, I practically live in these trees, so I should¡¯ve paid attention to what you were wearing on your feet and not taken you this way. I totally owe you new shoes.¡±

    Mollified, I sighed. ¡°No, you don¡¯t. I¡¯m the idiot who wore them, so¡ª¡± I gasped out a short scream when I almost ran into a spiderweb...with a huge furry spider hanging in it. With it inches from my face and staring me in the eyeball, I lurched against Knox, clutching his hand hard. ¡°Oh my God! Spider!¡±

    He laughed and steered me safely around the web. ¡°You really are a city girl...Felicity Girl.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s a stupid name,¡± I muttered, even though I kind of liked him coming up with a special name for me.

    ¡°Spider!¡± he warned suddenly and ran his fingers up my ribcage, making me leap away, screaming.

    He laughed, so I slapped him on the shoulder.

    ¡°That was so not funny.¡± I slugged him again, but he only laughed harder. ¡°Jerk.¡± I started to stomp around him, only for my slippers to get caught up again, making me stumble.

    Grr. Why did this only happen when he wasn¡¯t holding my hand?

    Half a breath later, he appeared at my side and silently took my hand. ¡°Man, you are way too fun to rile, City Girl.¡±

    I kept hold of his hand, but didn¡¯t answer.

    He shrugged, and we walked along, growing quiet. After a ways, my irritation retreated, and the sounds of the forest eased my temperament. When we approached a tree in our path, I started to move around it to the right, but Knox¡¯s fingers tightened around mine, taking me left. He kept moving left, letting me know we had a specific destination in mind.

    ¡°Where¡¯re we going?¡±

    He glanced at me, his eyes lighting with pleasure. ¡°You swear you¡¯ve never been out this way before?¡±

    I shook my head slowly, wondering what he was planning.

    His lips tipped into a grin. ¡°Then it¡¯s a surprise.¡±

    ¡°You weren¡¯t lying when you said you practically live out here, were you?¡±

    ¡°Nope. This is where I come when I need to get away. I know these trees like the back of my hand.¡±

    I nodded. This was his haven. Only a few weeks ago, it¡¯d become mine too. ¡°Strange,¡± I murmured thoughtfully. ¡°We were both so ready to defend our relatives that day we met, and they¡¯re the ones we always come out here to escape.¡±

    He glanced at me. ¡°Family loyalty makes no sense at all, does it?¡±

    I shrugged. Maybe it didn¡¯t, but I didn¡¯t feel like such the loyal Bainbridge being out here alone with this Parker boy. I felt reckless, and euphoric, and so free that a little bubble of joy in my chest began to grow and expand to unimaginable proportions.

    ¡°There,¡± Knox murmured in my ear as he pointed past me, letting me know we¡¯d arrived at wherever he¡¯d wanted to take me.

    I looked over and squinted when I saw...was that water between the trees?

    ¡°Oh my goodness.¡± I stared in wonder as we drew closer to a ramp that led out onto a small wooden dock. ¡°I had no idea there was a lake out here.¡±

    ¡°Strip pit,¡± Knox corrected. ¡°It¡¯s the only one. I guess they discovered a trace amount of coal years ago and did some mining, but never found enough to keep the project going. After they abandoned it, it filled with water.¡±

 Page 40

    I gazed into the still, dark pool as we stepped onto the ramp. ¡°Do you come out here to go fishing?¡±

    ¡°Nope. Can¡¯t. Too much of the mining minerals saturated the water, it¡¯s full of alkali.¡±

    I glanced at him curiously. ¡°Alkali?¡±

    He nodded. ¡°You know, the stuff that goes into batteries. Nothing can live in this pit because of the alkali...which makes it perfect for swimming.¡±

    I shivered. ¡°Wouldn¡¯t swimming in battery acid be dangerous?¡±

    Knox grinned as if my cluelessness was cute. Then he shrugged. ¡°Never made me sick before. It stains my clothes an awful muddy brown, but that¡¯s about it.¡±

    My breath caught at the thought of him wet and splashing around in this very pit. ¡°So...you¡¯ve swum here before?¡±

    He seemed to move closer without even really moving. ¡°Every summer for as long as I can remember.¡± Even his voice was quieter. Deeper. I couldn¡¯t breathe so well.

    Turning my attention to the water, I cleared my throat. ¡°Did you build this dock?¡±

    ¡°No. That must¡¯ve been your father, or one of your brothers.¡±

    ¡°Garrett, probably,¡± I mused more to myself. ¡°He¡¯s handy like that.¡±

    He didn¡¯t answer. Instead, he toed off his shoes and sat on the edge. As soon as he swung his legs over the side and let his feet dangle into the water below, he eased out a big sigh.

    Then he grinned up at me. ¡°If you hand me your shoe, I can rinse it off in the water for you.¡±

    I made a face. ¡°And let you stain it with battery acid water?¡±

    He rolled his eyes. ¡°I think the shoe¡¯s already ruined. I was just offering you a less muddy walk home.¡±

    Ugh, he made a good point. ¡°In that case, I can do it.¡± I slipped off both shoes and took the muddy one in hand before bending over the dock and out into the water.

    ¡°Careful,¡± he cautioned, grasping my hip. ¡°Don¡¯t fall in.¡±

    I hadn¡¯t been in any danger of falling at all until he went and touched me. At contact, I jumped like a scalded cat. He had to tighten his grip and yank me against him to save me from a strip pit full of battery acid.

    ¡°Damn, City Girl,¡± he murmured into my ear. ¡°What¡¯re you so jumpy for?¡±

    He knew exactly why I was jumpy, and that cocky little grin he sent me said so. I frowned. ¡°You¡¯re really going to call me City Girl from here on out, aren¡¯t you? You couldn¡¯t think of anything else.¡±

    ¡°Nope. I like City Girl. It suits you.¡±

    ¡°Does not.¡±

    ¡°Does too.¡± He kept holding my hip until he had me sitting next to him, close enough that our thighs brushed and I was nearly in his lap.

    I forgot to argue back. Taking a deep, shuddery breath, I laid my shoe out on the dock next to the clean one to dry out in the sun. Then I dangled my legs over the side of the dock to dip my toes into the water.

    Knox smiled approvingly and caught a piece of my hair.

    I sighed, happy and relaxed as he began to play with a couple locks. The dock bobbed in a lulling rhythm under us. ¡°It¡¯s nice out here. The water feels great on my feet.¡±

    ¡°Yeah.¡± He sounded distracted. ¡°We should wear our suits tomorrow and go for a swim.¡±

    I snorted. ¡°You¡¯re crazy if you think I¡¯m swimming in water that stains clothes.¡±

    With a shrug, he grinned. ¡°We¡¯ll skinny-dip, then.¡± As my mouth dropped open and words failed me, Knox just kept smiling. ¡°Can¡¯t stain clothes if you¡¯re not wearing any.¡±

    ¡°I...you...that...¡±

    He threw back his head and laughed. ¡°I¡¯m kidding.¡±

    I would¡¯ve slugged him on the shoulder again and told him how funny he still wasn¡¯t, but his brown eyes danced with so much enthusiasm when he looked at me, I forgot what I was going to say.

    I knew he could read all the temptation and longing in my expression when his smile died.

    ¡°Do you ever think about kissing me?¡±

    My mouth dried up and my mind turned to mush. ¡°Wha...what?¡±

    He just kept watching me as he coiled my hair around his finger. ¡°Because I do. All the time. Right before I go to sleep each night, first thing when I wake up in the morning, whenever I¡¯m coming out here to meet you, whenever I¡¯m with you.¡±

    The last part was a whispered confession he made as he leaned in and pressed his forehead to mine.

    I closed my eyes, afraid to breathe and even more afraid to reopen my lashes in fear this moment would end and I¡¯d find out it was all a dream.

 Page 41

    ¡°But what the hell am I thinking?¡± His whisper turned harsh. ¡°You¡¯re a Bainbridge. I¡¯m a Parker. We should hate each other on principle alone. I shouldn¡¯t even be your friend, much less want to kiss you.¡±

    My eyelashes fluttered open. ¡°You shouldn¡¯t?¡± I have no idea why I asked that as if to make sure he was certain of his claim. He¡¯d just said he shouldn¡¯t, so he shouldn¡¯t. Except I really wanted him to.

    His brown eyes blazed into mine. ¡°I won¡¯t,¡± he swore, his jaw hard with resolution.

    ¡°You won¡¯t,¡± I murmured.

    He shook his head. But he was right there; our faces were so close. Maybe I could be the one to just lean in and...

    When I did lean toward him, he leaned toward me, meeting me halfway. Oh God, I was going to kiss Knox Parker. I was going to press my mouth to his and¡ª

    What the heck did I think I was doing? This was insane. ¡°You¡¯re right,¡± I said, shaking sense back into my head and pulling away, dislodging his hold on my hair. ¡°We probably shouldn¡¯t even be friends. I should go.¡±

    I yanked my feet from the pit and began to pull on my slippers.

    ¡°City Girl,¡± he said, as if apologizing, trying to explain.

    ¡°No, you¡¯re right. This is... It¡¯s insane. I¡¯m going home and never¡ª¡±

    ¡°Hey,¡± he whispered.

    He caught my hand when I tried to stand.

    After drawing in a bracing breath, I turned back to meet his gaze. I expected him to spill out some other significant reason why we shouldn¡¯t kiss, why even talking together and meeting in the woods was so wrong, why we were supposed to be enemies, blah, blah, blah, but instead...his mouth pressed against mine.

    Too stunned to respond at first, I just knelt there, my knees digging into the dock, as he cupped my face in one palm and leaned in close. Then he tipped his head to the side and brushed his lips across mine again.

    My eyelids dragged closed, and a whimper escaped my throat.

    His mouth was so freaking soft. And warm. I pressed back, clutching his shoulder until my nails burrowed into his shirt.

    He made a sound that was somewhere between a groan and a growl, and his second hand cupped my face too before his palm slid across my cheek so he could sink his fingers in my hair. When his lips parted and his tongue came out to touch the seam of my mouth, I gasped from the bold sensation it caused...between my legs.

    ¡°Sorry.¡± He pulled his face back immediately but kept his hands in my hair. ¡°Too much?¡±

    He meant, not enough, right?

    Breathing hard, I only gaped. ¡°But you said...we shouldn¡¯t...kiss.¡±

    He grinned and swept his lips over my cheek. ¡°Yeah, well, I couldn¡¯t handle making you sad. And you looked sad when you tried to leave.¡±

    A smile bloomed, bright and broad, across my face. He smiled back and bit his bottom lip. Drawn to him and tempted beyond anything I¡¯d ever felt before, I leaned toward him, but he jerked back.

    ¡°We should probably stop there,¡± he said, looking a little panicked. ¡°I don¡¯t...I don¡¯t know if I can trust myself after too much more.¡±

    I nodded, but couldn¡¯t help but feel saddened. I already missed the feel of his mouth against mine. But he was right. We¡¯d already crossed too many boundaries. So, I started to turn away, except he growled and caught my wrist, spinning me back to him.

    ¡°Stop that,¡± he demanded, his eyes flashing with anger, right before he stamped his mouth back to mine.

    My fingers instantly gripped his hair as I pushed up onto my knees again and arched into him. ¡°Stop what?¡± I asked, breathless, before his lips attacked mine again.

    ¡°Stop looking so sad when I don¡¯t kiss you, and stop trying to leave when you¡¯re sad. You¡¯re not allowed to walk away from me unless you¡¯re smiling.¡±

    ¡°Then stop trying to be so noble and not kiss me,¡± I growled back.

    ¡°Fine,¡± he snapped and yanked me in for a scorcher. ¡°I won¡¯t.¡± This time, when he opened his mouth, I was ready for him. My tongue met his, and he jerked in surprise before he slid his into my mouth.

    And oh my God... Nirvana.

    I have no idea how many kisses followed that, or how long we spent just making out, mouth to mouth, but my lips were pleasantly swollen and my brain felt permanently dazed when I finally pulled away and said I needed to get home before someone actually started to worry.

    He nodded and gave me one last closed-mouth, chaste kiss before pulling away and watching me push to my feet.

    ¡°So...I¡¯ll see you around,¡± I said, suddenly uncertain.

 Page 42

    His eyes glittered with amusement before he merely nodded and answered, ¡°Yeah. See you.¡±

    I have no idea why his response rubbed me the wrong way when I was the idiot who¡¯d said the same exact thing to him first. Gah, I was the most insecure weirdo I knew.

    Tucking my hair behind my ear, I sent him one last unsure wave and spun away to hurry down the ramp to the shore of the strip pit.

    Before I reached it, however, he called after me. ¡°Hey, City Girl.¡±

    A giddy joy bloomed in my chest. ¡°What?¡±

    ¡°Seriously, bring your swimming suit tomorrow. We¡¯ll try out the alkali water.¡±

    Spinning to face him, I walked backward away from him. ¡°I don¡¯t know. I don¡¯t really need my batteries charged.¡±

    He grinned. ¡°After I get done kissing you hello, you will.¡±

    I threw my head back and laughed.

    And that was the first of many trips I walked away from him that summer with swollen lips and a silly grin plastered to my face.

    I followed Pick through the front doors of the Forbidden Nightclub Thursday evening, expecting the scent of maybe mold, sour alcohol, and sweat, because my childhood home had always smelled like that after my dad went on a bender. But I was surprised by how clean it smelled, like new wood, recent construction, even the hint of fresh paint.

    The nightclub had a dark ceiling that made it seem lower than it probably was. Tables and chairs took up the left side while the center was open and a small stage encompassed the right. Since the actual bar was located at the back, I continued to follow Pick that way where a handful of guys were milling around.

    One sat on a stool at the bar with his back to us as he popped a sucker in his mouth and watched something on the screen of the laptop in front of him.

    ¡°Hart, what the hell are you watching?¡± Another guy, whom I immediately recognized from the hospital as Ten, asked the stool sitter as he approached from the side to see for himself.

    ¡°Man, check this out. Someone put Taylor Swift¡¯s ¡®Shake it Off¡¯ song onto this eighties workout video, and it synched freaking perfectly. Holy shit, just look at that.¡±

    Ten watched for a second before he turned his face aside to give Hart an odd look. ¡°Dude, really?¡±

    ¡°Whoa.¡± Another guy approached them from the other side of Hart to watch the video. ¡°Someone please tell me guys don¡¯t still wear tights like that. That¡¯s way too much TMI for me.¡±

    Ten slapped a hand to his chest. ¡°Jesus, you disappoint me, Lowe. How can you even see what the dudes are wearing when the chicks¡¯ tits are bouncing around like that?¡±

    ¡°Okay, what¡¯s all the fuss about over here?¡± A fourth guy hopped over the bar so he could see the screen of the laptop as well. But as soon as he saw a second¡¯s worth, he immediately backed away and lifted both hands. ¡°You guys need help.¡±

    That¡¯s when Pick chose to announce us. ¡°Hey, everyone. This is Knox Parker. He¡¯s our new bartender.¡±

    All four men spun around, and every gaze landed on me.

    The fourth guy finally wandered closer, eyeing me up and down. ¡°Since when do we have a new bartender?¡±

    ¡°Since today,¡± Pick answered casually.

    Mr. Curious hitched his chin Pick¡¯s way. ¡°Is this the ex-con?¡±

    Pick shook his head and sighed. ¡°Ten,¡± he muttered. ¡°You got a big fucking mouth, you know that?¡±

    ¡°What?¡± Ten shrugged. ¡°Was I supposed to keep that secret?¡±

    ¡°Just...¡± Pick lifted his hands. ¡°Let¡¯s not go spreading his record around outside the six of us, okay? In fact, for the first week or so, you all don¡¯t even know his name. Got it?¡±

    None of the other bartenders seemed to get it. They stared at him as if he¡¯d lost his mind. I gave him my own confused glance, wondering why he wanted even my name kept under wraps. But he didn¡¯t explain himself.

    Finally, the one Ten had called Lowe pointed at me as he asked Pick. ¡°Is he¡ª¡±

    ¡°Yes,¡± Pick clipped out, sending Lowe a hard stare before Lowe whirled back to me and studied me from head to toe.

    A moment later, he huffed out a strange sounding, ¡°Oh.¡±

    I had no idea what they were talking about, so I transferred a leery scowl between the two of them, hoping they¡¯d clue me in. But all Lowe did when I glanced at him was offer me a nervous smile and a greeting nod, which only made me warier.

    What the hell?

    From his barstool, Hart tipped his chin up and decided to talk to me directly. ¡°So what¡¯d you do time for?¡±

 Page 43

    I turned my attention to him, and something in my gaze must¡¯ve intimidated him because he took an untrusting pull back in his seat. Since it was obvious I already skeeved him out, I couldn¡¯t help myself; I answered, ¡°Rape and murder.¡±

    A pregnant pause followed before Ten exploded, ¡°What the fuck, Pick? You just hired a murdering rapist to work with us? Dude!¡±

    Pick sent me a dry glance as if to tell me to keep my mouth shut. But I only gazed back, unrepentant. It wasn¡¯t as if I¡¯d lied. I had done time for both accusations.

    Rubbing a spot on his forehead, Pick frowned at his bartenders. ¡°How long have you idiots known me? Do you honestly think I¡¯d hire a rapist?¡±

    The disgust in his voice seemed to relieve them, but the one still standing closest to me, visually inspecting me, asked, ¡°What about the murdering part?¡±

    Pick shrugged. Then he glanced at Lowe and murmured, ¡°I¡¯m sure he had a good reason for that.¡±

    ¡°Oh, great. That¡¯s just great.¡± Ten threw his hands into the air and spun away, before facing Pick again. ¡°When he rapes and murders me, please tell my wife he probably had a good reason for it.¡±

    Hart, still sitting in front of the laptop, snickered. ¡°If he murdered you, Ten, he would have a good reason.¡±

    ¡°Shut it, motherfucker.¡±

    ¡°Make me, douche stick.¡±

    ¡°Better watch it, cock licker, or I will.¡±

    ¡°Fellas.¡± Pick lifted his hands. ¡°Jesus, my toddlers are better behaved than you two. Just...believe me when I say Knox is trustworthy. Okay? Now let¡¯s get back to work. Gamble, you¡¯re on training duty.¡±

    ¡°Yeah, thanks.¡± The guy next to me snorted out his sarcasm before drawing in a deep, irritated sigh and waving me to follow him behind the bar. ¡°This way, Parker. Looks like you¡¯re with me tonight.¡±

    I paused, sending Pick a doubtful glance for pushing me off on these men who obviously wanted nothing to do with me. Except maybe Lowe. But I wasn¡¯t sure what he was about, so I probably trusted him least of all.

    Pick merely waved me on. ¡°That¡¯s Noel by the way. Noel Gamble. He was a big football star back in the day.¡±

    I pulled back to get a better look at Noel, recognizing his name. They¡¯d let us watch football behind bars; I¡¯d probably seen a dozen, if not more, of his games.

    ¡°Was?¡± Noel scowled at Pick. ¡°That ¡®was¡¯ was only like a year ago, douche. Way to make me sound ancient and decrepit.¡±

    Pick merely shrugged and pointed at Ten. ¡°And you¡¯ve met Dipshit, aka Ten, aka Oren Tenning.¡±

    I blinked in shock. Oren Tenning was another name I recognized from television. I never would¡¯ve known him by his face since I¡¯d only ever seen him on a screen in football pads and wearing a helmet.

    ¡°Another football star,¡± I said, suddenly placing where I¡¯d heard the name Quinn Hamilton before, too. Zoey¡¯s husband had replaced Gamble after he¡¯d gotten hurt and was the current football quarterback for Ellamore State these days.

    ¡°Right,¡± Pick answered with a nod. ¡°And this is Asher Hart. He was the new guy before you came along.¡± Setting his hand on Asher¡¯s shoulder, he closed the guy¡¯s laptop before adding, ¡°He¡¯s been with us over a year and sings in some little band.¡±

    Asher snorted and reopened his laptop. ¡°He means an awesome, kick-ass band. We perform here every Friday if you want to check us out.¡±

    Grin flitting across his face, Pick pointed out the last guy, who was stacking glasses against the back wall. ¡°Last but not least, that¡¯s Mason Lowe. We¡¯re basically related since his woman and mine are first cousins, so I kind of have to play favorites with him.¡±

    ¡°What the fuck ever,¡± Ten called from where he was taking a chair off a table. ¡°I¡¯m your favorite, and you know it.¡±

    ¡°So have you ever tended bar before?¡± Noel broke into the introduction, obviously ready to get to work.

    I hadn¡¯t even been old enough to drink before I¡¯d been arrested, so no, I¡¯d definitely never tended a bar before.

    I shook my head.

    His jaw tightened briefly before he asked, ¡°Waited tables?¡±

    ¡°Nope.¡±

    ¡°Of course not.¡± He rubbed a spot on his forehead and sent Pick a scowl. ¡°Couldn¡¯t have made this even a little easy for me, could you, Ryan? Thanks a lot.¡±

    Pick waved Noel¡¯s resentment away as he seated himself at the bar and pulled out his cell phone to check something. ¡°He¡¯ll be fine.¡± Then he grinned. ¡°His dad was an alcoholic; he probably knows how to mix most drinks already.¡±

 Page 44

    When Noel sent me a questioning glance, I shrugged. My old man hadn¡¯t bothered with mixing; he¡¯d mainly drunk shit straight from the bottle. But if it helped Noel assume I had any more experience than I did, I¡¯d let him think it.

    ¡°We¡¯ll start with the cash register,¡± he said.

    He went over the basics and it seemed easy enough to follow, so I nodded my understanding. Then he pulled a couple of laminated posters out from under the bar. ¡°Here are some cheat sheets for prices and how to mix the most popular drinks. Or you can just ask me.¡±

    Letters and numbers blurred in front of me, but I bobbed my head some more. I¡¯d probably be asking him a lot tonight.

    ¡°Dirty glasses go in this rack until they¡¯re ready to be cleaned. When the tray¡¯s full, they go into this sanitizing booster heater here to wash them. And...¡± He paused. ¡°Hart! What the hell?¡± He slapped the bar top next to Asher. ¡°We open in five. Put the goddamn laptop away and get to work already. The Taylor Swift eighties dance video can wait.¡±

    ¡°Oh, I¡¯m past Taylor.¡± Asher grinned as he shut the laptop. ¡°I was watching a Nat Geo documentary on squirrels, and now I totally want a pet squirrel.¡±

    Noel blinked at him. ¡°Are you fucking serious right now?¡±

    ¡°What? They¡¯re freaking geniuses. You should see how they outsmarted this homeowner who kept trying to keep them out of his birdfeeder. I mean¡ª¡±

    Noel pointed. ¡°You need to get laid. Bad.¡±

    Hart wiggled his eyebrows. ¡°Let me borrow your wife for an hour, and I will.¡±

    With a frown, Noel opened mouth to reply, but Hart quickly added, ¡°Or your sister.¡±

    A passing Ten slapped him on the back of the head. ¡°Dream on, fucker.¡±

    Hart shrugged and glanced at me. He smiled briefly before clearing his throat and scratching the back of his neck. ¡°Hey, uh, were you kept at Statesburg when you were locked up?¡±

    I pulled back, my stomach muscles tensing from merely hearing the word. ¡°Yeah.¡±

    ¡°F-House?¡± he asked, and was there a hint of hope in his voice.

    I frowned, curious how he even knew what the prison¡¯s roundhouse was called. ¡°Why?¡±

    He just kept watching me, intently. ¡°Were you?¡±

    I nodded once.

    His shoulder dropped an inch. I¡¯m not sure if it was relief or more anxiety I saw in his response. ¡°Ever meet a Miller Hart there?¡±

    I knew who he was talking about immediately, so I narrowed my eyes in suspicion. The similarities in his last name and Miller¡¯s wasn¡¯t lost on me. ¡°The wife killer?¡±

    Asher flinched, but said, ¡°Yeah.¡±

    I shrugged. ¡°We didn¡¯t run in the same circles, but I knew who he was. He got his ass kicked a lot.¡±

    ¡°Really?¡± Hart seemed momentarily surprised by that piece of information, but then his chest heaved and his lips quirked with amusement. ¡°Good.¡±

    ¡°Who¡¯s Miller Hart?¡± Noel asked. ¡°Any relation?¡±

    Asher looked him in the eye. ¡°My dad.¡±

    As he moved away to help Ten take chairs down from tables, Noel frowned after him. ¡°Did he just tell us his dad killed his mom?¡±

    I shrugged. ¡°Sounded like it.¡±

    ¡°Well, fuck. That was news to me.¡±

    ¡°What was?¡± Pick asked, glancing up from his phone.

    Noel shared a glance with me as if asking if he should share Asher¡¯s little bomb of information, but then he murmured, ¡°Nothing.¡±

    ¡°Mmm.¡± Distracted, Pick went back to typing something on his phone. After he pressed it to his ear, he muttered, ¡°Fuck.¡±

    ¡°Everything okay?¡± Noel asked him.

    ¡°What?¡± Pick asked, swerving his gaze to Noel, though his thoughts were obviously elsewhere.

    ¡°Who¡¯re you trying to get hold of so bad? You lose Eva, or what?¡±

    ¡°No.¡± Pick immediately glanced at me, and the hair stood up on the back of my neck. Suspecting his urgent call had something to do with me, I narrowed my eyes. ¡°Just trying to reach one of the waitresses,¡± he said, ¡°but her phone keeps going straight to voice mail.¡±

    He¡¯d been hell-bent on trying to contact a certain waitress yesterday, too. I wondered if it was the same one and what the hell this waitress had to do with me. Studying him hard, I tried to figure out what he was hiding. The guy was holding way too many secrets for my taste.

    ¡°Oh, hey. Is it Felicity?¡± Noel asked, making me whirl to gape at him. ¡°Because I know for a fact her phone¡¯s been out of commission since yesterday afternoon.¡±

 Page 45

    My vision grayed as that name flooded me, drowning out every part of my brain until I was living in one big memory of her.

    ¡°How do you know that?¡± Pick¡¯s sharp voice jerked me back to the present, away from visions of curly red hair, big innocent blue eyes, and a smile that had melted my soul in two seconds flat.

    I blinked until Pick¡¯s face came into focus. But my ears were still buzzing with acute awareness, and my skin wouldn¡¯t stop tingling from just hearing that name.

    Next to me, Noel was shrugging. ¡°She showed up at our place yesterday. I guess she caught her douchebag boyfriend fucking some girl on their kitchen table, and get this. They kicked her out of the apartment.¡± He sniffed in disgust and shook his head. ¡°Aspen¡¯s having her stay at our place until she can find somewhere of her own.¡±

    ¡°Wait. Cam cheated on Felicity?¡± Mason paused beside Pick, scowling. ¡°What kind of idiot would do that? I¡¯m charging him double if he ever comes in here again.¡±

    ¡°I already was charging him double,¡± Ten called. When Noel snorted, he added, ¡°What? I¡¯ve hated that motherfucker since the first time he came in. The dick-licker rubbed me all kinds of wrong.¡±

    I couldn¡¯t say anything. Not that I would¡¯ve jumped into the conversation if I could have, but all the air vacating my lungs robbed me of the ability, even if I¡¯d wanted to. My vision went spotty all over again, and I latched on to the edge of the bar, hoping I didn¡¯t pass out.

    I tried to tell myself I was overreacting for no reason. Just because they were talking about some random woman named Felicity didn¡¯t mean they were talking about¡ª

    But then I glanced at Pick, and when I found him watching me with that look, I knew.

    Son of a bitch.

    They were talking about her.

    I could literally feel the color leach from my face.

    Pick turned his attention from me to sear Noel with a glare. ¡°Why the hell didn¡¯t you tell me this sooner? I¡¯ve been trying to reach her for over a day.¡±

    Noel blinked and pulled back, obviously surprised by the vehemence in Pick¡¯s voice. ¡°Well, sorry. But I had no idea you needed her. And hell, with all the hullabaloo of Hamilton becoming a dad and ex-convicts coming to work for us, I kind of forgot about it.¡±

    Pick slid his gaze back to me. I think he knew I was a split second away from reaching across the bar and strangling him, because he tipped his head toward the hall. ¡°Knox. In my office, now.¡±

    I nodded and followed him without a word. But as soon as the door was shut and we were alone, I grabbed him by the shirt and slammed his back against the wall.

    I sat on the dock, dangling my feet into the calm water below as I waited for Felicity in nothing but a pair of swimming trunks. Sans Bentley. Thinking maybe I should¡¯ve brought the kid today, I grabbed the edge of the dock with both hands and stared down at my nervous reflection in the depths below.

    What the fuck did I think I was doing, meeting Abbott Bainbridge¡¯s one and only daughter alone in the woods every day?

    It¡¯d been okay at first, like sharing aunt and uncle custody. She¡¯d only wanted to get to know her niece. I was cool with that. But Felicity impressed the hell out of me on a daily basis. She wasn¡¯t like any Bainbridge I¡¯d ever met before. She wasn¡¯t like anyone I¡¯d ever met. She didn¡¯t put on airs and stare down her nose at me. She didn¡¯t think all high and mighty of herself. She didn¡¯t treat me like a nobody.

    In fact, I don¡¯t think anyone had ever treated me the way Felicity treated me, or looked at me the way she looked at me. Like I was something special. Like I was someone.

    Her being one of the most beautiful girls I¡¯d ever seen didn¡¯t help ease my obsession with her, either. Which is probably why I kissed her, even if that had been the stupidest thing I¡¯d ever done, because now I was well and truly addicted, and there was no turning back from where this was headed.

    But, fuck...it¡¯d been worth it.

    Her lips, her soft cheeks, her hair. I couldn¡¯t wait to see her again.

    So, here I sat, restless and eager for today¡¯s rendezvous, even though I knew I should stay as far away from her as possible.

    The slap of flip-flops on the dock behind me made my heart jump-start into high gear. A grin tugged at my lips. Of course she¡¯d worn flip-flops through the woods. Only the most impractical shoes for my practical girl.

    Except she wasn¡¯t mine, and I shouldn¡¯t forget that.

    I wanted to whirl around and take in every inch of her. The craving was so strong I gripped the ledge harder until a splinter dug into my palm.

 Page 46

    Because I did want to see her so desperately, I refused to even rotate my head enough to catch a glimpse. Keeping my back stiff, I asked, ¡°Did you bring a suit?¡±

    Her steps paused a few feet behind me. ¡°Yes.¡±

    ¡°Then let¡¯s swim.¡± I pushed off the dock and dove into the water, relishing the initial rush of cold flooding me, cooling my heated thoughts.

    I swam out a ways under the surface before coming up for air. Shoving water out of my face and hair, I turned toward the dock to find her still standing there, holding a beach bag down at her side and wearing a long-ass T-shirt, no shorts, shades, and flip-flops.

    ¡°Well, what¡¯re you waiting for?¡± I called, waving her in to join me.

    She continued to hesitate. I could see her chew on her bottom lip all the way from where I floated. A part of me hoped she turned and ran. This thing, whatever it was, between us could only lead to trouble. But a majority of me ached for her to throw caution to the wind and just dive in.

    ¡°Is it deep?¡± she asked.

    ¡°Very.¡±

    Nodding, Felicity set her bag down beside her and slipped off her glasses before dropping them into the bag. Then her hand went to the hem of her shirt. I held my breath, waiting, anxious, hoping yet dreading. She lifted the cloth a few inches, exposing creamy white thighs. When she hesitated, I almost passed out because the peek she provided of that place where the top of her legs met up with her body was too much. It was covered in nothing but snug black Lycra and showed just enough of a gap between her thighs, I knew I could barely wedge my face in there perfectly.

    Instant hard-on.

    I wanted to invade that space, own it and make it mine. Not even the iciness of the pit could dampen how desperately my dick wanted to explore. But I was still grateful to be underwater so she couldn¡¯t see proof of just how much my teenage hormones wanted her.

    I didn¡¯t cajole or say a single thing to get her to join me, but she gave in to the temptation, anyway, and suddenly ripped the shirt the rest of the way over her head before letting it fall on top of her beach bag.

    My throat went dry. She was utterly breathtaking in a lanky yet graceful way. I had never wanted anyone the way I wanted her.

    ¡°Black suit,¡± I managed to croak. After clearing my throat, I added, ¡°Smart thinking.¡±

    God, had I just said something? I think I¡¯d just said something, and it¡¯d been really stupid.

    But Felicity sent me a smile anyway, making me feel like the fucking man. ¡°I didn¡¯t want to stain anything.¡±

    I knew she was talking about clothes, but all I could think was how meeting me out here alone in the woods could stain her reputation, and I almost told her to go home. But then she toed off her flip-flops, and even that affected me, reminding me of how it¡¯d felt to hold her ankle in my hand the day before. She¡¯d had such soft, perfect skin. I didn¡¯t want her going anywhere but into the water, with me.

    Her red hair glistened in the sunlight as she eased hesitantly toward the edge of the dock. I had no idea how she managed to make the locks look as wild as they were tame, but the mix of controlled chaos only made me more obsessed with it.

    I¡¯m pretty sure I¡¯d managed to get my hands in her hair every time we¡¯d met in the woods so far. And she¡¯d let me. That was what made my craving for her grow stronger. She might be an innocent and not want what I ultimately wanted, which was sex of course¡ªteenage boy here, remember¡ªbut she still felt the vibe between us. The pull. The chemistry. And I¡¯d bet money it was just as intense for her as it was for me.

    Not that I would act on it. Ever. She was only fifteen. I was eighteen. Her family was the enemy. I was too poor to even be able to treat her out to a decent date. And fuck, I wasn¡¯t much more experienced than she was. But that didn¡¯t stop me from wanting her, or using her face in my head as inspiration every morning when I jerked off in the shower.

    Watching her dip her toe into the cool depths was definitely another one for the spank bank.

    Immediately squeaking out her dislike, she jumped back away from the edge of the dock. ¡°Oh my God. It¡¯s freezing.¡±

    I splashed my arms around me lazily. ¡°It feels good once you get used to it. Trust me.¡±

    The glance she sent me had to be the most untrusting scowl I¡¯d ever seen. She shuddered once as if still feeling the chill of the water and then hugged herself.

    ¡°So, you¡¯re going to teach me how to do this swimming thing, right?¡±

    ¡°Huh?¡± I shook my head, a little disbelieving. How could she not know how to swim? Couldn¡¯t the rich and almighty Bainbridge afford to send his daughter to the best damn swimming lessons around?

 Page 47

    ¡°How about I just dive in, and we¡¯ll go from there? Okay?¡± she suggested.

    ¡°What? No!¡± I waved my arms to stop that idea dead and headed toward the dock to assist her.

    Damn it, I should¡¯ve brought floaties or something. We were going to have to ease her into this if she was a beginner.

    Except she¡¯d already backed up a few steps to give herself a running start. Before I knew exactly what she was going to do, she clamped her fingers over her nose, sprinted forward, and was hurling herself full force over the water, arms and legs wind milling as she screamed out her delight.

    ¡°Felicity!¡±

    Heart lodged in my throat, I could only gape as she torpedoed into the depths and was swallowed under the surface. The splash-back waves shoved me away, but it only took me a second to plow through them, swimming forward, desperate to reach her.

    When she didn¡¯t come up, and didn¡¯t come up, I panicked.

    ¡°Oh, shit. Ohshit, ohshit, ohshit. Damn it, Felicity, where are you?¡±

    I was about to dive under the surface and start search and rescue, when she said, ¡°Right behind you.¡±

    I whirled around to find her grinning madly and floating without any problems whatsoever.

    Clutching my chest, I gaped and panted out my relief. Then I exploded. ¡°What the hell?¡±

    She laughed. The damn girl actually laughed. ¡°What? Did you really think I couldn¡¯t swim?¡±

    ¡°Yes! You said...¡± Shit, what had she said?

    Smile bright and innocent and full of so much joy and sunshine that my angry fear instantly diminished, she gave me a small playful splash. ¡°I said maybe you could teach me a thing or two, you know, in case you knew a few tricks I didn¡¯t.¡±

    ¡°Oh, City Girl,¡± I murmured, shaking my head ominously. ¡°You¡¯re going to pay for this.¡±

    I dove at her, and she screamed, lurching to the side.

    No longer even remotely mad for the way she¡¯d just shaved a year off my life, all I wanted to do was catch her so I could kiss the hell out of her.

    She was slippery and fast, but I was faster. It only took me seconds to secure her into my arms from behind and rumble, ¡°Got you,¡± in her ear.

    Laughing hard and loud, she tried to wiggle free. But she found herself good and trapped. Finally giving up the fight, she rested her head back on my shoulder, and her spine seemed to melt against my chest as she sighed contentedly.

    ¡°Fine. Now that you¡¯ve caught me, whatever will you do with me?¡±

    I leaned down to press my mouth to her shoulder, my cheek brushing past hers. ¡°Now there¡¯s a loaded question if I ever heard one, City Girl.¡±

    She turned slowly in my arms to face me. The look in her eyes fanned the heat inside me, making it flame through my veins.

    ¡°I don¡¯t really like the name City Girl,¡± she said on a husky whisper while her eyes demanded I kiss her already.

    ¡°Just City then?¡± I asked, my voice gritty and clogged with desire.

    Her lips spread as a smile bloomed. ¡°Yeah. I love that.¡±

    I loved the way she said love, especially when she was looking at me the way she was looking at me.

    Once again hard, or maybe just harder than I¡¯d been before, I pressed my forehead to hers, overwhelmed by the wave of lust pounding through me. I¡¯d seriously never felt it this strong before. It freaked me out enough to make me hold back, afraid I was getting into something bigger than I could handle. But then she shivered, and thinking she was as swallowed up by everything as I was, I couldn¡¯t resist her any longer.

    I focused on her mouth, needing to taste it more than I needed my next breath. But what I saw had me blinking in confusion until the reality of what I was actually looking at completely set in.

    ¡°Holy shit. Your lips are totally fucking blue.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s because I¡¯m turning into a human Popsicle.¡± She sent me a trembling, embarrassed smile, and I suddenly realized she wasn¡¯t shaking from desire, but from the cold.

    I shook my head, confused. ¡°How can you still be this cold? I feel fine.¡±

    Even her laugh sounded like it was freezing. ¡°Well, I¡¯m sorry if my body doesn¡¯t adjust as quickly as yours.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s it.¡± I took her arm and began to swim us toward the dock. ¡°We¡¯re getting you out of the water. Right now.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯ll be fine,¡± she protested even as she swam along beside me with her teeth chattering up a storm.

    ¡°Yeah, as soon as you¡¯re dry.¡± Drawing her to the ladder, I added, ¡°Up.¡±

    ¡°Bossy,¡± she muttered under her breath but climbed anyway. Once she was out of the pit with water streaming off her long lean limbs, I concentrated on climbing out myself so I couldn¡¯t admire just how good she looked wet.

 Page 48

    She tiptoed barefoot to her bag and dug out a plush, oversized beach towel before wrapping it around her and hiding all the best parts.

    As I made it up to the dock and shook water from my arms, Felicity blinked wide blue eyes. ¡°Didn¡¯t you bring a towel?¡±

    I shook my head as I hand-wiped most of the moisture off my face. ¡°I always air dry.¡±

    Except, today, a towel would¡¯ve been damn handy, because Felicity¡¯s lips parted as she scoped out my bare chest. Then, as if she were following the path of a single wet droplet, she ran her gaze down, over my abs, and fuck¡­ I silently begged her to stop.

    Don¡¯t look down, don¡¯t look down, don¡¯t look¡ª

    Shit, she looked down, and her eyes bugged when she saw how closely the wet suction of my swim trunks clung to me...and my raging erection.

    Embarrassed out of my ever-loving mind, I rushed out words, not even sure what I was saying. ¡°D-do you want to sit? We should sit. Let¡¯s sit down.¡±

    I plopped my ass onto the dock so fast I think I jarred my cock. With a wince, I bent up a leg, hiding proof of my arousal, even though it was way too late for that kind of modest shit now.

    Felicity kept standing a second longer before clearing her throat and slowly lowering herself a good three feet away. Far enough away that she could be sure my dick couldn¡¯t accidentally swing out and whack her in the shin or anything.

    I swallowed and looked out over the water, trying to think up something to say, ask her if she was warmer now, how her day had gone, hell, what she thought of the weather. Or maybe I should just come right out and address it. Yes, I had a hard-on. For her. We¡¯d almost kissed; why wouldn¡¯t I be sporting wood. Right?

    But yeah, I just couldn¡¯t.

    Things had been going so good only a minute ago. I¡¯d had her relaxed and willing in my arms, her lips already puckering for my kiss. Where the hell had all this awkwardness come from?

    I wished she¡¯d say something like she usually did to smooth out an uneasy silence. But I think she was as embarrassed as I was and couldn¡¯t talk any more than I could.

    Hell, I would¡¯ve welcomed one of her lame jokes right about now.

    Wait.

    That was it!

    ¡°Okay, I have one,¡± I said, breaking the silence.

    She looked over, her blue eyes big with surprise and maybe a little leery anxiety. ¡°One what?¡±

    ¡°Joke,¡± I said.

    She blinked. Then blinked again. Face finally relaxing, she smiled a smile that made everything inside me come to life. Then she spun on her tush until she was facing me. Snuggling deeper into her towel, she announced, ¡°Okay, I¡¯m ready.¡±

    ¡°Okay,¡± I repeated, and then cleared my throat. ¡°Why does Humpty Dumpty like autumn?¡±

    Her eyebrows furrowed as she frowned thoughtfully. It was so adorable, my fingers itched to reach for her and yank her against me. A second later, she shook her head. ¡°I have no clue. Why?¡±

    ¡°Because he had such a great fall.¡±

    Felicity stared at me without reaction for a full five seconds before she exploded. ¡°What? How is that any less cheesy than the jokes I tell?¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s not,¡± I admitted. ¡°I think you just dragged me to the tacky side.¡± Unable to help myself any longer, I reached out. Grasping the back of her neck, I pulled her into me as I leaned forward onto my knees to meet her halfway.

    She gasped a split second before my mouth met hers. The taste of her surprise was sweet and addictive.

    ¡°Hi,¡± I said against her lips in between simple, but long closed-mouth kisses.

    She grinned back and murmured, ¡°Hi.¡± Her smile felt so good I had my tongue sliding against hers a breath later. My fingers delicately cupped the sides of her throat as she arched closer and grasped a handful of my hair at the base of my neck.

    I groaned and she gave a hungry whimper. When her towel slipped off one shoulder, my greedy fingers reached for all that bare flesh. Down her soft arm, my palm slowed when I realized it was gliding over tiny knots. I pulled back to frown at her skin. ¡°You still have goose bumps.¡±

    ¡°Don¡¯t worry. I¡¯m not cold at all.¡±

    A couple water drops clung to her lashes as she blinked and moved her gaze to my chest. I realized I had goose bumps too, and I wasn¡¯t cold either. In fact, I was burning up.

    Still staring at me with a dazed kind of wonder, Felicity puffed out a breath and slowly lifted her hand...toward my chest. I held all the air in my lungs until she made contact, and then I released it with a rush as her soft, hesitant fingers slid up my ribcage and toward my pecs.

 Page 49

    When her thumb brushed across my nipple, I made an involuntary sound. Then I was reaching for her, burying one hand in her hair and pressing my mouth to the side of her throat and the other hand around her waist to urge her forward, against me...right into my lap. Her thighs naturally spread to straddle me as she slid into place, and my teeth nipped at the wet black strap of her swimming suit, aching to bite into it and draw it off her shoulder, expose her breasts to me and¡ª

    I hadn¡¯t realized my arm had tightened so much around her waist and tugged her quite so deep into my lap until my aching cock pressed right up between her legs, only the damp cloth of our swimwear separating us.

    She stiffened in my arms, and I froze.

    ¡°Is this too much?¡± I asked against her shoulder, fearing that if I looked into her face right now, I¡¯d see fear or disgust. But a breath later, she relaxed into me and pressed even harder against my erection

    ¡°No,¡± she said as she nuzzled her cheek against mine.

    It was too much for me, though. Hearing her breathless answer, feeling her in my lap, smelling her, tasting her, I wanted more. I wanted everything. So I kept pressing my forehead to her shoulder without diving back into her lips. Except, I could picture them perfectly in my head, still parted, and dewy, and so freaking tempting. I wrapped both arms around her and pulled her in until I had my chin tucked over her shoulder. Refusing to make eye contact, I gazed out toward the water so I couldn¡¯t be tempted by the sight of her mouth again.

    She burrowed against me and hugged me back. For such a skinny girl, she was an amazing hugger. And her breasts definitely didn¡¯t seem so small when they were flush up against me. We fit together perfectly. She was soft and warm and feminine.

    There was so much weird shit going on inside me, things I¡¯d never experienced before that went way above mere physical need. It overwhelmed the fuck out of me.

    I combed my fingers through her hair to hide the way they¡¯d begun to shake.

    Then she had to go and admit, ¡°I can¡¯t remember the last time I was hugged,¡± and that intense awareness in me me coiled even tighter around my heart until my entire chest felt compacted and full.

    ¡°Then I¡¯ll hug you every day,¡± I promised.

    My erection dug against her feminine warmth and her hard nipples poked through her swimming suit and right into my chest, but I didn¡¯t even care to push for more. Because simply hugging Felicity Bainbridge to my heart was the most fulfilling sensation in the world.

    ¡°What the fuck!¡± I growled as I pinned Pick to the wall of his office by his throat. ¡°What the actual fuck? You lied to me.¡±

    He lifted his hands, though the calming gesture did little to placate me. ¡°I take it Felicity is a trigger with you. Good to know.¡±

    I thumped him against drywall. ¡°This isn¡¯t funny.¡±

    He sputtered out a sound. ¡°Trust me, man. I¡¯m not laughing. But I am curious. Are you pissed to hear her name because you blame her for what happened or because you¡¯re upset to learn how she turned out?¡±

    My fingers tightened in his shirt as I narrowed my eyes. ¡°Why would I blame her for anything?¡±

    He blew out a breath. ¡°You shouldn¡¯t. And it¡¯s a relief to hear you say you don¡¯t. Now back up off me so I can breathe. Then I¡¯ll explain everything. I never lied to you.¡±

    I let go of his jugular and lifted both hands as I took a step back. ¡°So, what? You just forgot to mention she works here? She fucking works here? Did you never hear what happened to us?¡±

    The fucker took his sweet time answering as he straightened his shirt and wiped a palm over his face before drawing in a deep breath. Then, all he said was, ¡°Oh, I heard. It was the big talk in our neighborhood months after you were arrested.¡±

    That¡¯s when I lost it. My breathing had picked up and my core temperature broiled off the charts. Even my fingers tingled with the urge to curl them into fists and start swinging. But learning she worked here¡ªwith me¡ªwas more than I could take.

    ¡°How can she work here, the daughter of a millionaire? She should be off at some Ivy League university getting a doctorate in fucking psychology while she¡¯s engaged to some rich son of a bitch, who showers her with love and affection and all that shit. She should not be here, slaving as a waitress in some seedy-ass bar with all kinds of scumbags grabbing her ass whenever she brings them their beer. What...the fuck?¡±

    Glowering, Pick folded his arms over his chest. ¡°Okay, I¡¯m going to ignore the fact you just called my highly classy nightclub seedy, and I¡¯m going to tell you Felicity cut ties with her family the day she turned eighteen. She never went to college¡­because she couldn¡¯t afford it. She struggles just to make ends meet.¡±

 Page 50

    The air felt socked from my lungs as I stared at him. I couldn¡¯t quite understand what I was hearing, because it made no sense at all. ¡°No.¡± I shook my head, confused. When Pick opened his mouth to say more, I banged him once more against the wall. ¡°Why would she do that? Why?¡±

    She had to have gone to college. It¡¯d been her life goal. Her dream to be a child psychologist. I¡¯d spent the last six years surviving hell and convincing myself it¡¯d been worth it because at least she¡¯d been able to follow her dream. That was the only thing I¡¯d ever wanted. I couldn¡¯t bear to hear otherwise. I couldn¡¯t handle learning she¡¯d suffered through one miserable day.

    Except, shit. If she hadn¡¯t gone to college as she¡¯d planned, then she hadn¡¯t become a child psychologist, and she hadn¡¯t done anything she¡¯d really wanted to do. She was stuck working as a fucking waitress, while some douchebag had cheated on her?

    I felt sick to my stomach hearing how she¡¯d moved on to someone else, but Jesus, learning she wasn¡¯t even pampered and cherished and spoiled rotten by the fucker twisted the knife deeper.

    ¡°Why do you think she left them?¡± Pick asked, reminding me I still held his shirt in my hands and had his back once again rammed against the wall. When he lifted an eyebrow as if I should already know why she¡¯d abandoned her family, I growled.

    ¡°Because of me?¡±

    When he didn¡¯t answer, I spun away from him and ran my hands over my head, letting the stubble on my scalp scrape against my palms. My stomach heaved, and I worried I really might be sick. So I bent at the knees and rested my hands on them.

    But the rage and overwhelming helplessness from what I¡¯d just learned consumed me. With a roar, I straightened and kicked the first thing in my path¡ªwhich happened to be Pick¡¯s desk¡ªwith the flat of my foot. It flew over onto its side and crashed to the floor, sending papers and his computer flying.

    When the glass in the screen broke, shattering across the floor, I stared in amazement, unable to believe what I¡¯d done... until the urge to do more flooded me.

    ¡°God...damn it!¡± I roared at the top of my lungs.

    She was supposed to be taken care of, protected, spoiled, happy.

    Not this.

    The fury and need to destroy took over. I spun toward the wall and reared back my arm, slamming my fist into sheetrock. Absorbing the pain in my knuckles as they split open and bled over the backs of my fingers, I hit the wall again, relishing it.

    ¡°What the hell?!¡± As the office door burst open, I whirled toward Noel and all the others spilling in behind him, my thirst to punch more peaking.

    But Pick stepped closer, lifting both his hands in a placating manner. ¡°He¡¯ll be fine, guys. Just give us a minute.¡±

    Except it was obvious to everyone gaping at me and past me toward Pick¡¯s ruined desk and computer that I was anything but fine.

    Noel shook his head. ¡°No way, man. We¡¯re not leaving you alone with this psycho. What¡¯s going on?¡±

    I stalked toward him. ¡°Are you deaf? He said leave us the fuck alone.¡± I swung at him, but he ducked.

    And my fist connected with the jaw of the guy behind him.

    Ten immediately howled, clutching his face. ¡°Shit, man. What¡¯d I do?¡±

    Instantly contrite for catching him and not Noel, even though Ten had annoyed the hell out of me the first day I¡¯d met him, I took a step back, my fingers uncurling. The red disappeared from my vision, and as I blinked it away, the fury subsided.

    ¡°Sorry,¡± I muttered to my feet.

    Oh, shit. I couldn¡¯t believe I¡¯d just done that. I was worse off than I¡¯d originally feared.

    But Ten¡¯s muffled answer from between his hands, where he was still holding his face, shocked me. ¡°Christ, you have one hell of a right hook.¡±

    Boggled why he would sound impressed instead of pissed, I blinked at him, and more of my frustrated anger dissolved.

    ¡°Let me see,¡± Pick said, closing in on Ten and pulling his hand away so he could have a look at the damage. But Ten slapped him off.

    ¡°Fuck you, man, don¡¯t baby me. I¡¯m fine.¡±

    ¡°Whatever.¡± Pick slugged him companionably on the shoulder and said, ¡°Put some ice on it. The rest of you, get back to work.¡± He directed his gaze to Noel. ¡°Parker and I have a few things to discuss. I¡¯ll send him out in a minute.¡±

    Noel glanced at me, and he didn¡¯t look like he was going to move any time soon.

    I glared back, rumbling, ¡°I¡¯m calm now.¡±

    Except I wasn¡¯t. My rage had merely morphed into crushing defeat. I was still a complete fucking mess and anything but composed.

 Page 51

    Pick grasped Noel¡¯s arm and hauled him into the hall. ¡°He¡¯s done raging out. I got this. Trust me.¡±

    Noel opened his mouth to argue, but Pick shut the door in his face.

    I shuddered and glanced at the broken desk and computer. All that needless destruction and yet Felicity was still a cheated-on, homeless waitress. ¡°I¡¯ll buy you new stuff to replace everything and find a different place to stay,¡± I promised. I knew I should offer to quit the job too, but Christ, I needed the money.

    I hoped to God he didn¡¯t fire me before I¡¯d even started, though I¡¯d totally understand if he did.

    ¡°No, you will not find a different place to stay,¡± Pick said as he turned to take me in. ¡°And forget about the desk and computer for now. We¡¯ll discuss that later.¡± But then he shook his head as if disappointed, and the shame spiked inside me.

    I exhaled, deflated. ¡°Fuck.¡± Sinking into a leather couch I¡¯d left untouched, I buried my face into my hands and tried to will my fingers to stop shaking.

    ¡°She was supposed to go to college,¡± was all I could think to say. She was supposed to carry on and live her life to the fullest, be happy, content. Not make decisions based on me, which had led her to the crappy existence she had now.

    A hand landed on my shoulder. ¡°How she ended up isn¡¯t your fault.¡± I glanced up at him, and he squeezed me tighter. ¡°And I wouldn¡¯t even say she¡¯s that miserable. She¡¯s actually a very upbeat person.¡±

    Of course she was. She¡¯d always been able to find the bright side of things. She wouldn¡¯t be City if she couldn¡¯t. And she¡¯d promised me she would stay that way.

    An ache spread through my chest. My eyes stung and my throat closed over.

    But when I caught pity in Pick¡¯s gaze, my jaw knitted. I hated letting him see me this vulnerable, hated that my eyes wouldn¡¯t stop watering. So I growled, ¡°What kind of fucked-up game are you playing? Why didn¡¯t you tell me up front she worked here?¡±

    ¡°Because Felicity is my friend,¡± he started, and I tightened against the pain those words brought.

    Once upon a time, she¡¯d been my friend.

    ¡°Honestly, I hadn¡¯t seen her since high school, not until a couple months ago when she learned I owned this place and came to me for a job. But since then, she¡¯s become part of our family, so my loyalties are with her, which is why I wanted to tell her about you working here before I told you about her...in case she had a problem with it. Except I¡¯ve been unable to reach her and therefore unable to clue her in to what¡¯s going on.¡±

    I shook my head, not sure if I bought his story. But I couldn¡¯t think up any other reason why he¡¯d shove us together like this. ¡°And if she does have a problem with me working here?¡± I asked.

    Pick shrugged. ¡°Then I¡¯ll help you find employment elsewhere.¡±

    I nodded, respecting that for some reason, probably because he¡¯d claimed his loyalty to her. I couldn¡¯t outright hate him for backing her up. But still...what the fuck had he gotten me into?

    I¡¯d told myself I would not look her up when I got out, I would not find out where she was or what she was doing. I¡¯d leave her the fuck alone, because that was what was best for her. Yet now I was working at the same goddamn bar as her? Because of Pick Ryan? It was all just...

    ¡°Unbelievable,¡± I muttered as I wiped my hands over my face and stood so I could pace the room. ¡°Why did you even hire me in the first place?¡±

    ¡°A couple of reasons. I really do need another bartender, and I remember you. You have all the values I demand in an employee.¡±

    I sniffed. ¡°Values?¡± Spreading my arms, I motioned to his demolished office. ¡°Did you not see what I just did?¡±

    Pick glanced at his broken things impassively, then returned his attention to me. ¡°What I saw was a man full of a lot of anger and resentment over the injustice he¡¯s been served, over learning the woman he loves hasn¡¯t had the easiest time of it. But I also saw a man who pulled back as soon as he struck out at one of my boys. I¡¯ve seen someone gentle with my children, patient with my nosey wife, and respectful in my home. So, trust me. I¡¯m pretty confident I have you pegged right, Parker.¡±

    I snorted and glanced away, but the fucker kept talking.

    ¡°Let¡¯s see. You came across a pregnant girl in trouble and got her help. Then, when you were left alone with her car, you didn¡¯t take off with it even though you could¡¯ve used the cash it would¡¯ve brought you. Instead, you used the rest of all the money you had to clean it. Then you returned it to the hospital to see how she was doing.¡±

 Page 52

    I grumbled under my breath that none of that made me full of such great values.

    Pick¡¯s lips quirked as if he knew something I didn¡¯t, then he kept talking. ¡°There¡¯s also another reason I took you in. I owed you one for something you probably don¡¯t even know you did for me.¡±

    I glanced at him, frowning in confusion. ¡°What¡¯s that?¡±

    The secretive smile kept playing around his mouth. ¡°I¡¯ll tell you about it sometime. But not yet.¡±

    My eyes narrowed even more. I didn¡¯t like how mysterious he was being. He didn¡¯t seem to mind, though. He kept talking.

    ¡°Aside from that, there¡¯s the fact I had to be the asshole who told you about your family.¡±

    I flinched, not wanting to go there.

    ¡°I feel like shit about that, man. And you had nowhere to go, no one to contact for help, no money for...fuck, anything. I wanted to make it up to you somehow. So I took you in and offered you a job because it was the first thing I could think to do. It was what you needed most.¡±

    I started to tell him he didn¡¯t owe me shit¡ªeven if I had unknowingly done him a favor once upon a time¡ªI could take care of myself. But he held up a hand. ¡°And then I also felt inclined to keep tabs on you in case Felicity wanted to know where to find you when I told her you were out.¡±

    Just hearing her name slayed me. I winced and kept my eyes averted. ¡°I can¡¯t keep you from telling her, can I?¡±

    ¡°Nope.¡± He shook his head.

    I sniffed, irritated that I couldn¡¯t control this; she was going to find out about my release and whereabouts. Soon. But I still tried to fight it. ¡°Well, I don¡¯t see how she¡¯d care to know.¡±

    ¡°Don¡¯t you?¡± Pick murmured. ¡°I do.¡±

    I looked up at him, wondering what the hell that meant. He¡¯d used the words friendship and loyalty when talking about her, but just how the hell close were they?

    What had she told him about us?

    Did this mean she wanted to see me again?

    A crazy, anxious hope raced through me, but I swallowed it down. Didn¡¯t matter what she wanted. Didn¡¯t matter what I wanted. After what I¡¯d become, the safest place for her was as far away from me as I could keep her.

    ¡°Don¡¯t ever let me work with her,¡± I growled, piercing Pick with a deadly serious glare.

    He opened his mouth as if to argue, so I waved a hand toward the dent in his wall. ¡°Just look at what I did. I¡¯m fucked up. I don¡¯t want her anywhere near that.¡± I didn¡¯t want her to see me like this; I didn¡¯t even want her to know I was like this.

    Pick blinked away an expression of shock, but then nodded as if he understood. ¡°Don¡¯t worry. I¡¯ve already scheduled it so none of your shifts coincide.¡±

    I nodded. ¡°Good.¡± That was all I needed to hear. ¡°I¡¯ll find some homeless shelter or something to stay in tonight.¡±

    Not bothering to wait until I was dismissed, I stormed toward the door, but he called, ¡°No, you won¡¯t. I trust you, Knox. I trust you to sleep in the same apartment as my family, the same bed with my little boy and girl.¡±

    I glanced back at him, shocked, and he nodded. ¡°Yeah, we saw that they¡¯d crawled in with you in the middle of the night, and we didn¡¯t move them. Because both Tinker Bell and I trust you. We know you¡¯d never hurt them. Don¡¯t take that lightly.¡±

    I gulped and looked away, because shit, I didn¡¯t take such conviction lightly. It humbled me, yet made me feel worse, because I knew I didn¡¯t deserve it. Just what did he think he saw in me that was so reliable, and how in the hell could he have any kind of faith in me when I had none in myself? After what I¡¯d just done? When my biggest fear these days was myself? How could he be so sure?

    Something dark dwelled inside me now, something black and violent and ugly, like a stain on my soul that could never be washed away. I hadn¡¯t been in control of myself at all when I¡¯d destroyed his office. That scared me.

    I should never be trusted near anything that anyone deemed valuable. And to me, Felicity Bainbridge topped that list.

    ¡°I¡¯m going to take off in a few minutes,¡± Pick said. ¡°You can get one of the guys to drop you off at my place after work, I¡¯m sure. I will see you in the morning, Knox.¡±

    I couldn¡¯t argue with his determined dismissal. His belief in me made me want to believe in myself. It made me fucking hope.

    Knowing I¡¯d probably regret it, but still unable to tell him no, I nodded my acceptance for now and left him there. I was still shaken when I returned to the front, but I was determined to do this, work for him and pay him back for all his faith and charity.

 Page 53

    They¡¯d already opened, and the place was beginning to fill. Ten and Asher were moving between tables, pausing to take orders while Noel and Mason worked the bar. But when Mason spotted me, he sent me a jerky nod.

    ¡°Yeah, you should probably work back here tonight.¡± He hurried out from behind the counter, ushering me to take his spot, probably thinking it safest to keep me as far away from the customers as possible. Public safety and all that.

    Noel was a lot more brusque and cold than he¡¯d been before my office scene as he directed me in what to do. It was disorienting at first. My dyslexia would barely let me read shit on the cash register, but luckily I had a strong memory and most everything was color coordinated.

    Usually he popped over to tell me prices or how to mix something before I could even ask, which also made it harder for me to fuck up. But I think I surprised him with my adeptness because he kept sending me shocked little glances every time I did something right without his interference.

    By the time I hit a groove, the club was packed, music poured through the speakers and this energy thrummed through my veins. It felt good, doing honest labor, being free, not having a warden breathing down my neck or other inmates plotting my demise.

    An exhausted Ten plopped onto a stool, setting down a tray full of empty glasses and bottles. His eye was already turning red where I¡¯d jacked him, and I was even more chagrined to discover I¡¯d hit him on the scarred side of his face.

    He rubbed his jaw as I cleared his tray for him, tossing empty bottles in the trash and stacking the used mugs in the tray to be washed.

    ¡°Shit, man,¡± he said. ¡°You really do have one hell of a hit. None of these other douchebags ever left my bell ringing quite this long after they hit me.¡±

    ¡°And trust me, we¡¯ve tried,¡± Noel told me as he paused to add more used glasses to the tray.

    ¡°You had the most Nancy swing of all, Gamble,¡± Ten called after him as Noel moved back to his side of the bar.

    Grinning, he turned back to me. I felt the need to apologize again, even though I¡¯d already said sorry in Pick¡¯s office. But I held my tongue.

    He didn¡¯t seem to mind my silence. ¡°Seriously,¡± he said. ¡°Did you box or something in prison, because shit... I¡¯m impressed.¡±

    ¡°Something like that,¡± I said, figuring all that fighting to stay alive might as well be equated with boxing.

    ¡°Well, you should take it to a ring. I¡¯d definitely put money on you.¡±

    After he wandered away, I considered what he¡¯d said. At first, I was deliciously tempted. It¡¯d felt good to swing and hit things. But then I shuddered, thinking that feeding my aggression had to be bad. Not that it mattered. I was already fucked in that regard, damaged beyond repair. Maybe I could use my ability to hit¡ªsince it seemed to be my only talent¡ªto make money. I knew I couldn¡¯t stay here long.

    Felicity was going to find out I was around. I had no idea how she¡¯d react, but I was pretty sure she¡¯d eventually want a face-to-face. I dreaded it as much as I relished the idea of getting to see her again. As long as I was gone before she tried for some contact, though, I¡¯d never have to worry about it.

    A pair of tipsy girls slid up to the bar and ordered some pi?a coladas. I spilled some ice when pouring it into the mixer, so after they left, I knelt down to gather the stray cubes.

    I wasn¡¯t down there five seconds, before I was interrupted.

    ¡°Hey, Noel,¡± a voice called cheerfully from above me, tapping me on the top of the head. ¡°Can you get me a¡ª¡±

    The woman jerked her greeting short when I looked up, startled by the contact. Piercing blue eyes widened and familiar lips parted in shock.

    I froze, unable to breathe, unable to blink, unable to think.

    With her perfect face wreathed in ringlets of red hair, Felicity Bainbridge gaped at me before pulling back and shaking her head slightly. ¡°You¡¯re not Noel.¡±

    Unable to look away, I rose on unsteady feet. Air finally seesawed through my lungs as I took her in. She hadn¡¯t changed at all, except to grow a few new curves. Otherwise, my sweet, flawless City was standing in front of me, a mere counter separating us.

    My tongue decided to go on vacation.

    Wrinkling her nose, she demanded, ¡°Who¡¯re you?¡±

    Her gaze had long since left my face and was scrolling down my body.

    Heat, and longing, and crushing disappointment rippled through me. I knew I looked different, but realizing the one person I¡¯d shared more intimacies with than anyone else on earth didn¡¯t even recognize me was kind of agonizing.

 Page 54

    It was the last solid shred of proof that the boy I¡¯d once been no longer existed.

    I opened my mouth with no idea what to say when Noel saved me by appearing at my side. ¡°Hey, this is Felicity. She¡¯s a waitress here, so no charge. ¡¯Kay?¡±

    ¡°Noel.¡± The relief in her voice as she whirled to him made me clench my teeth and restrain myself from flinching. But damn, it singed the old heart muscle to watch her turn away from me so readily in favor of another man. ¡°What...who...?¡± Her gaze darted back to me briefly before she eyed him expectantly.

    ¡°Oh. This is the new guy,¡± he explained. ¡°Apparently, he doesn¡¯t have a name yet.¡±

    ¡°Uh...¡± Felicity¡¯s eyebrows crinkled with confusion. Again, she spared me the barest curious glance before turning her attention right back to Noel. ¡°O...kay. Since when do we have a new bartender?¡±

    ¡°Since tonight. What¡¯re you doing here, anyway? Where¡¯s Aspen?¡±

    ¡°Your wife decided I needed to drink my troubles away.¡± Felicity rolled her eyes but chased it with a smile. ¡°She came in with me, except Mason waylaid her with some school questions so¡ªoh! Here she is.¡±

    When a small dark-headed woman appeared at her side, Felicity tugged her close and pressed their cheeks together as she grinned at Noel.

    ¡°Hey, you,¡± Noel greeted, reaching for the new woman as he leaned over the bar to pull her in for a greeting kiss.

    As their mouths meshed, my gaze strayed back to Felicity. It was incredible how little she¡¯d changed in six years. There was a bit more maturity to her face, and yeah, her body was no longer sixteen, but other than that, even her hair was the same.

    My mouth watered and body tightened with a need I hadn¡¯t felt in quite a while. I wanted to follow Noel¡¯s lead and reach for my girl, tug her over the bar to me and devour her mouth. My fingers flexed, tingling with the need.

    I still couldn¡¯t believe she was right fucking there.

    And I wasn¡¯t touching her, wasn¡¯t even talking to her.

    As if sensing my intent gaze, she glanced at me. She began to look away, just as quickly, but then darted back with one more quick frown my way, as if letting me know she thought I was a creeper for staring the way I was. When she moved fractionally closer to Noel¡¯s woman, where she was still locking lips with Noel, the two pulled away.

    Glancing at me, Noel hitched his chin to the other end of the bar. ¡°I got these two. You can get that group down there.¡±

    For a heartbeat, I couldn¡¯t move away from City. She was right there, the one person who owned my soul.

    But then reality crashed around me. She didn¡¯t know me; I was a complete stranger to her. And I¡¯d promised myself I¡¯d stay away. Forcing my ass into gear, I gave Noel a single nod and turned away from her to take the order of the three guys at the other end of the bar.

    I hummed Colbie Caillat¡¯s ¡°Falling for You¡± under my breath as I skipped through the trees and dodged mushy, marshy-looking spots. I knew the path well by now. I¡¯d traveled it every day for the past two weeks.

    Knox and I no longer met by ¡°our¡± tree. Now we went to ¡°our¡± dock at the strip pit. Sometimes we swam, sometimes we didn¡¯t, but every time we ended up kissing. I¡¯d become well and truly addicted to kissing. I swear, my mouth could just live against Knox¡¯s. I hated it every time we had to pull apart and go home. But he had an evening job at a local dog food factory, and always had to leave to get ready for that, and I...well, I didn¡¯t want to risk causing any suspicion from my family by staying away too long, even though no one had noticed my lengthy afternoon walks in the woods yet.

    Today, I dared more than usual. After sneaking a basket into the kitchen, I¡¯d packed us an afternoon snack. From all our conversations, I knew Knox loved peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, nacho chips, and apples the best, so I crammed them inside along with two bottles of water and plates and napkins.

    When I heard my mother¡¯s voice nearing the kitchen, I dashed out the back door and streaked across the yard to the trees, panting by the time I reached the first one. After ducking behind it, I waited thirty seconds before peeking around the trunk to make sure no one had come outside to look for me. The coast looked clear, but I was still wary, so I dodged from here to there for a while until I felt secure enough to realize no one was following me. Once I relaxed, the excitement of getting to see Knox again rose.

    I was unable to stop grinning and actually murmur some of the lyrics aloud by the time I reached the pit.

    ¡°I¡¯ve been spending all my time just thinking about you,¡± I crooned, only to give a happy squeal when I realized I was the first to arrive. ¡°Yes!¡± I had some time to set up my surprise for him.

 Page 55

    I¡¯d lacked the forethought to grab a picnic blanket, which made me sigh in disappointment because I wanted everything to be perfect. But then I told myself Knox probably wouldn¡¯t even notice. There were a lot of details he skipped over, like towels, and combs, and prissy things my mother would insist upon. That was one of the very reasons I was so crazy about him. He didn¡¯t prioritize image before me.

    A slight breeze tried to spoil my plans and blow away my plates and napkins, but the apples proved to be the perfect paperweights and kept them in place. I saved the sandwiches in their plastic baggies so no dirt or bugs could blow onto them as I placed them next to the apples. I didn¡¯t know how long I¡¯d have to wait because we couldn¡¯t exactly give each other reliable schedules.

    The other day, he¡¯d had to wait three hours on me before I could get away from my mother and one of her lectures. Then Max had cornered me afterward, waylaying me more and trying to console me or something for the way Mother had spoken to me. I was almost in tears by the time I reached the dock, thinking I¡¯d missed him. But there he lay on his back, feet crossed at the ankles and nearly asleep as he dried himself in the sun from taking a dip in the pit.

    Relief racing through me, I¡¯d hurried up the ramp to reach the dock, only to slow to a stop and just relish the sight of him in wet swimming trunks and nothing else.

    ¡°I never knew Sleeping Beauty was a guy before,¡± I finally said.

    He hadn¡¯t opened his eyes but a smile crept across his face. ¡°Why do I have a feeling I¡¯m about to be kissed to see if that wakes me up?¡±

    ¡°Probably because you are.¡± Kneeling beside him, I grinned until I leaned down and lightly pressed my mouth to his. He groaned and threaded his fingers through my hair, kissing me back. By the time I pulled away, his eyes were open and gleaming a golden sparkling brown, and his lips were stretched wide with pleasure.

    ¡°I guess this is proof,¡± he¡¯d murmured. ¡°You¡¯re definitely my Princess Charming.¡±

    Sighing over the memory, I sat on the dock next to our waiting picnic and hugged my knees as I stared at the water of the pit. The breeze fluttered tendrils of red hair into my face and the dock swayed lazily under me while the sun soaked lethargic warmth into my bones.

    Even just waiting on Knox was more enjoyable than anything else on earth. Setting my chin on my upraised knees, I noticed a rock sitting on the edge of the dock.

    With a slight frown, I studied it further. It was a fairly large rock that couldn¡¯t have been carried in by the wind. Something had to have placed it there, and I¡¯m pretty sure it hadn¡¯t been around the day before.

    I shied backward, wondering who¡¯d been on my dock. If one of my brothers had been here recently, did that mean they could come back today? Right now? Maybe I should put away one of the plates; if they caught me here, they wouldn¡¯t realize I was expecting company. But as soon as I reached for Knox¡¯s plate, I noticed a small corner of white paper fluttering under the rock¡¯s weight.

    A note.

    With a gasp, I scrambled forward. After rolling the rock aside, I unfolded the single sheet. When I saw, Hey Princess Charming, as the greeting, a smile lit up my entire face. But then I read the rest of the note.

    I¡¯m so sorry I missed you today and couldn¡¯t stick around. Something came up. I doubt I can make it tomorrow and the weekend doesn¡¯t look good either. It¡¯s nothing to worry about though. Just family crap. Hopefully I¡¯ll make it out Monday, and trust me when I say, I¡¯d rather be here with you instead.

    Disappointment slumped my shoulders. The rest of my day pretty much felt ruined now. I kind of wanted to just sit here and cry, but at least he¡¯d been sweet enough to leave me a letter. I even understood why he hadn¡¯t signed it.

    I ran my fingers over his handwriting, frowning at the printed letters. Maybe it was because he hadn¡¯t used cursive, but there was something about his penmanship that reminded me of a fourth grader¡¯s instead of a senior in high school, even though nothing was misspelled and every letter was written precisely, as if he¡¯d taken hours to plot out each one. There was just something in the spacing that was...off.

    I folded it gingerly and tucked the note into my basket. Then I gathered our picnic and packed it away.

    When I stood to leave, there was a heaviness inside me. It would be days¡ªdays¡ªbefore I saw him again. My heart ached and my throat kept tightening, which was always what it did right before I cried.

    I tried to hum some more ¡°Falling for You¡± to keep the waterworks at bay, but my spirit had plummeted. Entering the thickest, darkest part of the forest, I wiped my hand over my cheek to make sure I hadn¡¯t actually dropped any tears. If I cried now, I¡¯d look a mess by the time I made it home, and someone may wonder what was wrong with me. But my cheeks were dry and that was good. Sticking close to a large oak because the path I was taking had a muddy spot, I yelped when a crunching rattled the ground behind me.

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    Whirling around, I scanned the woods, but nothing seemed out of place. I guess something could¡¯ve just fallen from the branches, but it had sounded more like footsteps breaking twigs, like something or someone was walking, following me. Except, if it¡¯d been an animal, it wouldn¡¯t have stopped as soon as I¡¯d spun around, would it? Which made me think...human.

    An eerie sensation crawled up the back of my neck. Suddenly, I knew I wasn¡¯t alone.

    ¡°Hello?¡± I called uneasily.

    No one answered. If one of my brothers were around, they would¡¯ve answered me. Why wouldn¡¯t someone answer me...unless they didn¡¯t want me to know they were out here with me?

    ¡°Oh God,¡± I didn¡¯t mean to whimper. Someone was following me through the woods.

    I turned to flee, but a voice called, ¡°City, wait. It¡¯s just me.¡±

    Jerking to a stop in my tracks, I froze a good second, frowning and unable to believe I was hearing the voice I was hearing. Then I spun toward it. ¡°Knox?¡±

    He half stepped out from behind a tree, while keeping the other half hidden as he waved. ¡°Hey. I¡¯m sorry, I didn¡¯t mean to scare you.¡±

    Blood flooded my brain with an overabundance of happy endorphins as I dropped my basket and hurried to him. ¡°Oh my God, I can¡¯t believe you¡¯re here. I didn¡¯t think you were going to make it today.¡±

    As I neared him, he moved, keeping the tree between us so I couldn¡¯t see all of him. I slowed to a stop. ¡°Knox?¡±

    He tapped the side of the tree with his palm and then pressed his forehead to it. ¡°Yeah, I, uh, I can¡¯t meet today. I just wanted you to know.¡±

    ¡°I did know. I got your note.¡±

    ¡°Right. So...maybe Monday. Okay?¡±

    I shook my head, having no idea what was going on, but feeling as if I¡¯d done something wrong, as if he might never meet me in the woods again. ¡°Why won¡¯t you even look at me?¡± I finally asked.

    One eye appeared from the side of the tree, but it looked so full of regret, it calmed my worries. At least I hadn¡¯t done something to put him off. But still¡­something was seriously wrong.

    ¡°Why were you following me?¡± I hedged, hoping to somehow work my way to the real issue of whatever was bothering him.

    He went back to pressing his forehead to the tree and bumping his hand against the trunk, only now he used his fist instead of an open palm. ¡°Just, you know, to make sure you got home okay?¡±

    I sniffed. ¡°I¡¯ve never had a problem walking home by myself before.¡±

    That one eye reappeared, serious as it watched me. ¡°You¡¯ve never walked home by yourself before. I¡¯ve always been there.¡±

    Instant warmth spread through me, knowing he¡¯d always been worried about my safety, always seeing to my protection. Then I frowned. ¡°No you haven¡¯t.¡±

    ¡°Yes I have.¡±

    ¡°But what about the first day? When we met. You ran off first.¡±

    He shrugged. ¡°I almost stumbled into your brothers that day, so I doubled back and caught sight of you heading home. You didn¡¯t look like you were walking too steady, and after you¡¯d hit your head the way you did, I worried you might not make it. So I¡¯ve followed you back to the edge of the woods ever since, just to be sure.¡± Another shrug. ¡°It became a habit.¡±

    I grinned. ¡°Why you stalker, you.¡±

    He didn¡¯t grin back, and I couldn¡¯t take the subtle approach any longer. I dove at him and grabbed his arm, yanking him away from the tree until he was facing me fully.

    He gaped at me, startled. Then he winced with guilt and shame.

    ¡°Oh my God,¡± I blurted, slapping my hands over my mouth. ¡°Your eye. Knox, what happened?¡± I stepped to him to touch the bruised side of his face, but he flinched away.

    ¡°It¡¯s not a big deal.¡±

    ¡°Not a big...¡± I repeated, incredulous. Then I set my hands on my hips. ¡°Knox Arrow Parker, yes, it is a big deal. Who did this to you?¡± He glanced away, and unease plopped heavily into the pit of my stomach. ¡°Was it my brothers?¡±

    ¡°No,¡± he instantly reassured, taking my hands and giving me an earnest look. ¡°This was...it was my own fault.¡±

    I cocked my head to the side, not understanding.

    He sighed and glanced away. ¡°I didn¡¯t want you to see because...it¡¯s embarrassing.¡±

    All my sympathies aching for him, I stepped in closer. When he didn¡¯t shy away, I leaned up onto my toes and gingerly pressed my lips to the red spot. He closed his eyes and sighed as if he relished the contact. So I kissed his boo-boo again. Turning into me, he nuzzled his nose into my hairline and then wrapped his arms around me. ¡°How do you always know how to make everything better?¡±

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    ¡°It¡¯s a gift.¡± Cupping the unwounded side of his face, I rained more delicate kisses over the slightly puffy skin. Something had to have made quite an impact to leave this much of a mark. I shuddered, wondering what he¡¯d been through.

    He merely held me close and tipped his face down toward me, allowing me to perform more tender loving care.

    When I had him good and mollified, I kissed his jaw and murmured into his ear. ¡°How did you get a black eye, Knox?¡±

    ¡°My dad,¡± he rasped, only to turn into me fully and hide his face in my hair.

    I hugged him back, and we held each other for the longest time.

    ¡°I made us a picnic,¡± I finally said.

    He made a sound in his throat; it reminded me of a sob. ¡°I know. I saw. It broke my heart to watch you pack it back up.¡± He groaned his regret. ¡°I should¡¯ve just come out of my hiding spot and shown you my eye then.¡±

    ¡°Don¡¯t worry about it,¡± I assured him, taking his hand. ¡°We can still eat it now.¡± I led him back to the basket, but when I reached for it, he took it from me.

    ¡°I can carry it.¡±

    I smiled at him. ¡°Thank you. Do you want to eat at our tree? I think that¡¯s closer than the dock.¡±

    He nodded once. ¡°Okay.¡±

    So we walked to the tree and neither of us spoke the entire way. It felt strange, leading him along. He was never so meek. But whatever had happened between him and his dad must¡¯ve rattled him. It took everything I had not to ask. Not yet, anyway. He¡¯d talk when he was ready.

    We reached the trees and made ourselves comfortable on the ground. His eyes lit up when he saw everything up close that I¡¯d brought. Meeting my gaze, he sent me a half grin. ¡°Good choices.¡±

    ¡°I had a feeling you might approve.¡±

    Sitting side by side with our backs to the trunk of our tree and our shoulders brushing, we polished off everything. Neither of us spoke, but it was a comfortable silence, filled with a handful of glances and shared smiles.

    As he was licking the last of the Doritos off his fingers, he rumbled out a moan of delight. ¡°Mmm. One of my favorite flavors. Only one thing on earth tastes better.¡±

    ¡°What¡¯s that?¡± I asked, determined to find this food he loved, as rare as it may be, and procure it for him, even if I had to travel to the ends of the earth.

    He glanced at me, his lips curving warmly. ¡°You.¡±

    When he leaned toward me, I met him halfway, smashing my mouth against his. His tongue immediately spiked deep, gifting me with a hint of peanut butter, apple and ranch.

    ¡°You taste like heaven,¡± he broke away to tell me through shallow breaths. Then he tugged me onto his lap, and I was suddenly riding his erection through our clothes.

    We¡¯d only gone this far a couple of times, but I loved each and every encounter. I thought maybe I was ready to do more just as one of his hands landed on my waist, under my shirt. While his other hand buried itself into my hair, he slid his fingertips against my bare skin.

    I sighed into his caress, welcoming it. His warm palm moved from my waist, around to my back. It followed my spine up until his fingers reached my bra. His lips left mine to move along my jaw, then down my throat. Following the line of my bra, he slid his hand around to the front until he was cupping me through cloth, but as soon as his thumb brushed over my straining nipple, I gasped and went rigid, not expecting the zing that went through me.

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I¡¯m sorry.¡± His hand came out from under my shirt in record time and lifted in surrender. ¡°Jesus, City. I don¡¯t know what I was thinking. I should¡¯ve asked first. I wasn¡¯t... I¡¯m so sorry.¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s okay,¡± I assured him. I wanted to tell him he could put his hand back there. I¡¯d actually liked it; it had just shocked me. But from the look on his face, he wasn¡¯t going to touch me again, so I lost my nerve.

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± I said this time, because I hated ruining the moment. I rested my head on his shoulder and he immediately wrapped his arms around me. ¡°I just¡ª¡±

    ¡°You didn¡¯t do anything wrong,¡± he said and kissed my forehead.

    He kept his mouth against me and continued to hold me close, so I wrapped my hands around his forearm and clung back. Nestling onto my side so I could press my ear to his slowing heartbeat, I closed my eyes and enjoyed what I did have with him.

    ¡°He doesn¡¯t hit us a lot, you know,¡± he said out of the blue. ¡°I don¡¯t want you to think he just wails on us every day.¡±

    I turned my nose into his shirt and inhaled his clean, Knoxy scent. ¡°Okay,¡± I said.

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    ¡°As long as we stay out of his way, he pretty much forgets we even exist unless one of us really gets in his face, and then it¡¯s just a single wallop, and he¡¯s done.¡±

    ¡°And you got in his face?¡± I guessed, stroking my hand up the muscles in his arms.

    He shook his head. ¡°No, not this time. Someone stole a bottle of his Wild Turkey, and he blamed me.¡± With a snort, he added, ¡°If he¡¯d been thinking, he¡¯d have known it couldn¡¯t have been me, though, because I was at work last night when it went missing.¡±

    ¡°Who do you think took it?¡±

    Lifting his shoulder into a half shrug, he guessed, ¡°Rocket probably. But I¡¯m not sure. I just knew it had to be one of the siblings, and since they¡¯re all smaller than me, I took the punishment.¡±

    My fingers wandered over his shoulder and up the side of his neck. ¡°Do you do that a lot? Take the punishment for your younger siblings?¡±

    After he gave another casual shrug, I decided he probably did. ¡°You¡¯re such a good big brother.¡±

    ¡°Meh.¡± He shook his head, disagreeing.

    ¡°Tell me,¡± I murmured, scraping my fingers over his prickled jawline. ¡°How much of the money that you make at the plant do you save away, and how much do you spend on your family?¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± he mumbled, shifting under me as if suddenly uncomfortable. ¡°Maybe...fifty, fifty.¡±

    ¡°Errr.¡± I made the sound of a buzzer, telling him he¡¯d given the wrong answer. ¡°Try again.¡±

    He sighed. ¡°Fine. I probably squirrel away...twenty percent.¡±

    My smile bloomed. ¡°So I stand by my statement. You, Knox Parker, are an amazing brother.¡±

    His eyes glittered as he gazed at me without responding.

    My eyebrows lowered. ¡°What?¡±

    ¡°Nothing.¡± He shook his head but kept watching me in that thoughtful way.

    ¡°No. Tell me. Why¡¯re you looking at me like that?¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s nothing. I just...¡± His cheeks went flushed and my mouth fell open. What the heck? What had I done to make him blush? Finally, he glanced away and mumbled, ¡°I just like being with you. You make me happy.¡±

    I drew in a shuddery breath, tempted to spill giddy, girly tears. When I¡¯d first bumped into him weeks ago and had daydreamed about his beautiful smile and windblown hair, I never in my wildest dreams would¡¯ve guessed he¡¯d be saying something like this to me, and look like he meant every breath of it.

    I licked my lips, just...overcome. I really did need to do something to cool myself down, or I¡¯d blurt out how much I¡¯d fallen for him.

    So I said, ¡°That¡¯s because I know kangaroos can jump higher than the Empire State Building.¡±

    A grin cracked his lips, and he shook his head. Then he gave a silent laugh. ¡°You¡¯re delusional.¡±

    I gasped in mock outrage. ¡°What? You actually think the Empire State Building can jump higher?¡±

    This time, he laughed out loud and grasped my hand. Staring at our interlaced fingers, he murmured, ¡°I even live to hear your corny jokes.¡±

    The brush of tree branches overhead as they swayed in the gentle wind seemed to creak through my bones. I stopped breathing, too afraid to ruin the moment with even an exhale.

    He sounded so serious and reluctant to tell me this, so I knew he meant what he said, deeply. When he finally darted a glance my way¡ªhis eyes full of uncertainty and fear¡ªI rushed out a breath. Oh, crap. I needed to say something back and quit swimming in my internal happy dance.

    ¡°I like being with you, too,¡± I whispered.

    ¡°I¡¯m serious, City.¡± His gaze burned into mine. ¡°Coming here every day to be with you is like...¡± He shook his head and glanced out between the trees. ¡°It¡¯s not even real, it¡¯s so nice. It¡¯s like some kind of dream.¡±

    ¡°I know what you mean.¡± Every morning when I woke, my first thought was to wonder if the day before had really happened, or if it¡¯d just been a lovely hallucination.

    With a sigh, he pressed his mouth to my temple. ¡°What¡¯re we going to do?¡± he said into my hair.

    I stiffened because he made it sound as if we were doomed, but then I realized... maybe we were. ¡°What do you mean?¡±

    ¡°I mean, about us.¡± Pulling back, he stared into my eyes with a worry that sparked my own fears. ¡°Outside these woods, what do we have? I can¡¯t meet you anywhere in public. Hell, I probably can¡¯t even talk to you at school when it starts back up. Neither of our families would ever let us stay together. Your father would probably have me murdered. Mine would disown me.¡±

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    I hugged myself as the truth behind his words made me shiver with dread. ¡°Are you saying you want to stop meeting?¡±

    ¡°No!¡± He tugged me closer against his chest, his eyes large. As he buried his nose into my hair, he murmured, ¡°God, no.¡± Then he kissed my temple and smoothed stray locks out of my face. ¡°Getting to see you is the highlight of my day. I don¡¯t think I could handle not seeing you anymore.¡±

    I rested my cheek against his heartbeat and closed my eyes. ¡°Then, what¡¯re you saying, Knox?¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± He sighed out his frustration. ¡°I¡¯m just...fuck, I¡¯m pissed. This isn¡¯t fair. If I pass you on the street or in the halls at school, I¡¯m going to have to ignore you, and I hate that. I don¡¯t want to ignore you. You¡¯re my City.¡± His words broke at the end and I rubbed his arm soothingly.

    He kissed my hair again. ¡°Let¡¯s go to the movies. Tomorrow.¡±

    I let out an incredulous laugh. ¡°Are you insane? We can¡¯t...¡±

    But when I looked up at him, there was something so desperate and determined in his eyes, I couldn¡¯t deny him anything. I shut my mouth, and he continued pleading.

    ¡°I have the night off. We could go there separately, sit in the last row, and I don¡¯t know, accidentally sit right next each other. I¡¯ll even provide the popcorn and drinks.¡±

    ¡°This is really important to you, isn¡¯t it?¡±

    ¡°Yes, it is. I don¡¯t want to only ever meet you in the woods, even though I love this. I...I gotta feel like there¡¯s something real beyond these trees. I want to be able to take you on a date. Just...once.¡±

    I nodded, not against the idea at all, even though it¡¯d probably be the riskiest thing we¡¯d ever done. No way could I tell him no, so I said, ¡°Okay, then. It¡¯s a date.¡±

    ¡°Who was that?¡± Aspen asked as the new bartender moved away.

    I sent a cursory glance his way, still surprised Pick had hired a new guy so suddenly, but then I returned my attention to the alcohol lining the back wall, because that¡¯s why I was here: to get my drink on and fall somewhere between pleasantly numb and utterly oblivious.

    As Noel told Aspen something about explaining everything to her later, I tried to decide what poison I was going to drown myself in. Tequila? Vodka? Rum? Bourbon?

    Just about anything would do.

    To help me forget.

    I might have possibly had a mini breakdown at the salon earlier. Aspen and I had gone in, fully prepared to get nearly every inch of my hair chopped off, but at the last moment, when the lady had brought the scissors out, I¡¯d freaked.

    I¡¯d burst into tears, claiming I couldn¡¯t do it.

    Aspen had patted my back as she¡¯d ushered me outside with all my hair still intact, telling me it was about time I cried.

    So I cried harder because I couldn¡¯t tell her I wasn¡¯t crying over Cam. Then I cried some more because I probably should¡¯ve been crying over Cam.

    I should¡¯ve been mourning the loss of the confidence he¡¯d stripped from me when he¡¯d betrayed me and felt the need to turn to another woman. And I did feel stupid and exposed and oh-so insecure after learning I wasn¡¯t even enough to keep someone like Cameron Finkle interested.

    And yet that wasn¡¯t why I cried.

    I should¡¯ve cried because I felt awful for not loving Cam, for not being devastated that it was finally over between us. I should¡¯ve cried to realize what a heartless shrew I¡¯d become for not caring the way I should.

    But that¡¯s not why I cried either.

    I bawled like a baby because I hadn¡¯t been able to cut my hair, because I couldn¡¯t stop honoring a man I¡¯d never see again.

    I bawled because I couldn¡¯t stop loving him like I so desperately wished I could.

    I bawled because I missed him.

    At the end of it all, Aspen announced we were going to ladies¡¯ night at Forbidden to unwind, aka, get me completely plastered. We¡¯d actually started drinking at her house, but I suspected she didn¡¯t want Noel¡¯s younger brothers to see me turn into a sloppy, weepy drunk...or maybe she just wanted to spend time with her man while he worked.

    In either case, I¡¯d already reached a nice blurry-hazed buzz. The loud chaos around me was a nice distraction too. There were plenty of other things to think about besides¡ª

    I yelped out a startled scream when someone came up from behind me and grabbed my shoulders before slapping a quick kiss to my cheek.

    ¡°Hey, Felicity.¡± Asher saddled onto the barstool next to me. ¡°I heard you finally got rid of Cam. So...I call dibs.¡±

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    ¡°I think not, douchebag.¡± Ten appeared on the other side of Aspen. ¡°She¡¯s hooking up with Caroline and me.¡± He winked my way. ¡°Isn¡¯t that right, Three?¡±

    I wrinkled my nose. ¡°That is so wrong. And stop calling me Three. I will never...in hell...respond to that name.¡±

    Ten grinned and pointed at me. ¡°Except you just did.¡± He slashed at the air and added a triumphant, ¡°Boom.¡±

    I rolled my eyes. ¡°I still can¡¯t believe you asked me to be your number three.¡±

    ¡°I can.¡± Asher scooped up a handful of beer nuts from the bowl in front of me and popped them into his mouth. ¡°He¡¯s a douche like that.¡±

    ¡°Wait, he did what?¡± Aspen spun to gape at Ten.

    He glanced around for Noel. When he was assured his wife¡¯s brother was busy, he held up a finger in my direction. ¡°For your information, I don¡¯t share my woman with just anyone, thank you very much. You are the only person I have ever asked to be our number three. I mean, I was momentarily tempted to ask Amisha, Caroline¡¯s new friend from the filmography department, because she¡¯s so fucking hot, but I figured she¡¯d probably take the offer to heart, so...I chose you. That should make you feel lucky.¡±

    ¡°Wow, you know, I do. I am so lucky you hit on me...right in front of your wife.¡±

    ¡°He¡¯s such a loser,¡± Asher agreed.

    ¡°Whoa, whoa, whoa,¡± Ten spit out, scowling. ¡°I did not hit on you. Damn. I very nicely asked if you¡¯d consider being in a threesome with us, because one, you knew I wasn¡¯t being seriously serious. Two, of course I did that shit in front of Caroline. It¡¯d be sleazy, slimy, and, you know, cheaterish if I hadn¡¯t.¡±

    ¡°Oh, because I¡¯m sure your offer sounded just so classy otherwise,¡± Aspen dryly intoned.

    Ten ignored her and held up a third finger. ¡°Three, even if hypothetically, you agreed, I never had plans to touch you. I just wanted you to buddy up with me so we could pleasure Caroline together, like a team.¡±

    I slapped a hand to my forehead and sighed. ¡°Lord, please don¡¯t tell me there¡¯s a four.¡±

    ¡°And four.¡± Ten grinned, wiggling his eyebrows. ¡°You knew you were feeling the chemistry with her that night you two met. I mean, I could feel the vibes you ladies were putting off all the way across the bar. Sure, her idea of the perfect threesome,¡± he paused to roll his eyes, ¡°is two guys and one girl, but fuck that. This is my theoretical daydream, and I say two chicks and one dude. However, she did admit that if she ever did allow another woman in bed with us, it¡¯d be you.¡±

    ¡°Aww.¡± I pressed a hand to my heart. ¡°I can¡¯t believe she chose me. Caroline is such a sweetheart.¡± I glanced at Aspen and smiled from the compliment. ¡°I love her.¡±

    Ten wiggled his eyebrows. ¡°Yeah, you want to kiss her, don¡¯t you?¡±

    My smile died flat. ¡°You¡¯re impossible.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m just saying. She can do amazing things with her tongue.¡± He winked. ¡°Think about it.¡±

    Noel returned, carrying two of the biggest Bahama Mamas I¡¯d ever seen.

    As Aspen snagged hers and began to chug, I hooked my thumb Ten¡¯s way. ¡°Noel, I can¡¯t even begin to imagine why you let this guy marry your sister.¡±

    He sighed and sent Ten a hard scowl as if to ask what he¡¯d said about Caroline this time. But Ten only grinned.

    Noel turned back to me. ¡°Unfortunately, he snuck her off behind my back, and they eloped.¡±

    My eyebrows spiked. ¡°Really?¡±

    Noel motioned to Ten. ¡°Why do you think half his face is so mangled?¡±

    Ten snorted. ¡°Oh, whatever, fucker. You only wish you could make this much art.¡± Glancing at me, he said, ¡°I fell into a river.¡±

    ¡°Ahh.¡± I sipped on my straw, studying his scars. There really did seem to be an artistic bent to them. And the coloring was... Wait. ¡°Do you have a black eye?¡±

    He sent me a proud smirk. ¡°You like it? I swear, this is my favorite shiner yet.¡±

    I shook my head, confused. ¡°Huh?¡±

    ¡°Ten has a habit of getting black eyes from people,¡± Aspen explained before she glanced at him. ¡°Who gave you this one?¡±

    ¡°Hmm. Sorry, that¡¯s confidential.¡± His gaze strayed to the new guy. ¡°But I¡¯ll tell you...I¡¯m seriously impressed with his right hook.¡±

    I glanced that way too, but the bartender¡¯s back was to us as he counted out bills from the cash register. He seemed massively wide. And his arms... God, those things were ridiculous. If he¡¯d been the one to throw the punch, then I didn¡¯t doubt Ten; I bet he could pack a mean blow.

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    I turned back to my crew when Asher stamped another kiss to my cheek. ¡°I gotta get back to work,¡± he announced. ¡°But really, I can be next in line if you want. I have good teeth, a pretty smile, and the best damn singing voice you¡¯ll ever hear.¡±

    I laughed and shoved at his arm, because I knew he was as serious about dating me as Ten was about making me his number three. These guys thought of me as a sister, someone to tease and protect. Not girlfriend material. ¡°Get back to work, Rock Star,¡± I told him.

    He grinned and saluted me, then took off. Ten disappeared seconds later, leaving Aspen and me at the bar to get back to work on our drinks. We talked and laughed and after another Godzilla-sized Bahama Mama each, we danced. Mason bumped into us at one point, and even he had to give me a hug in sympathy, telling me he¡¯d send his woman Reese around to cheer me up sometime.

    Hours later, I decided I loved this place. I loved the noise and music, and every single one of the hunky brotherly bartenders who went out of their way to cheer me up. I sat slumped on a stool at the bar, leaning a little too heavily against Aspen as I polished off my umpteenth drink and made a decision. Since this was an important enough declaration, I had to lift a proprietary finger into the air as I made it. ¡°Tha¡¯s it. I¡¯m done with men. Forever and ever.¡±

    ¡°That new bartender keeps checking you out,¡± Aspen slurred into my ear, not listening to a freaking word I¡¯d just said.

    ¡°Huh?¡± I glanced over, but he was already in the process of turning away. I scowled at his backside, even though he had a nice one. A very nice one. Hmm. It figured. I think only the sexiest men alive were allowed to bartend at Forbidden. It had to be some kind of decree written somewhere, or something.

    My drinking buddy nudged my elbow. ¡°So? What do you think? I think he¡¯s yummy.¡±

    I sent her an incredulous glance because I¡¯d never heard her appreciate anyone¡¯s sexiness except Noel¡¯s before, and every freaking bartender who worked at Forbidden was hotter than sin.

    When she wiggled her eyebrows, letting me know she¡¯d had one too many to drink, I snorted out a laugh. Aspen was adorable and hilarious when she drank.

    She leaned into me and whispered loudly, ¡°I think you should ask him if you can ride his disco stick. You know, to help you repound from Cameron.¡±

    I snorted and slapped a hand over my mouth. ¡°You mean, rebound?¡±

    ¡°Tha¡¯s what I said.¡± Her brow crinkled with confusion. ¡°Wasn¡¯t it?¡±

    ¡°Sure,¡± I murmured, since re-pound seemed just as apt a term for what she was talking about.

    ¡°So?¡± She went back to nudging my elbow. ¡°What do you think of him?¡±

    I reluctantly returned my gaze to the new guy. He was half turned away this time. From the side profile, something about him rang strangely familiar, and it sent a zinger I wasn¡¯t expecting through all my girly parts. I blinked, wondering where the heck that had come from. Then he turned fully away, and the bulkiness and breadth of his shoulders brought back a complete stranger¡¯s profile, which knocked some reality back into me.

    He really was a massive work of perfection, but I felt uncomfortable by the unexpected way just looking at him had made my body react. Guilt bit at my conscience because I¡¯d only ever experienced such an instant physical craving for one other person in my life. So I said, ¡°Meh. Too dark and brooding for my taste.¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± Aspen chewed on her straw as she watched him. ¡°I think there¡¯s something hot about it. Like you just want to soothe his tortured soul.¡±

    I snorted. ¡°And what¡¯s up with the overly tight T-shirt?¡± Okay, now I was just trying to find details to nitpick since I was done with men forever and ever, and maybe because I really didn¡¯t like the way I kept envisioning myself ripping that tight T-shirt off him and just sinking my claws into his pecs before licking them. ¡°I mean, yes, you¡¯re built, buddy. We get it.¡±

    As Aspen snorted out a laugh, the new bartender turned his head just enough to the side, as if listening in on something...like our conversation.

    I gulped and flinched back, even though there was no possible way he could¡¯ve heard me in this loud, crowded place all the way at the other end of the counter. Could he?

    I decided to quit bashing him, even though man bashing had felt fun. But he was a stranger¡ªnot Cam¡ªand he hadn¡¯t done anything to deserve my scorn.

    ¡°I think I¡¯ll leave his disco stick alone,¡± I told Aspen.

    ¡°Okay, whatever.¡± She shrugged, letting me know it didn¡¯t matter to her. ¡°I¡¯m just saying, if he was good enough for Pick to hire, he can¡¯t be half bad.¡± Then she sucked down the last of her drink.

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    Noel appeared in front of us and took Aspen¡¯s drink away. ¡°That¡¯s it, ladies. No more alcohol for either of you. The bar¡¯s about to close, anyway. And just so you know, you¡¯re both riding back to the house with me. We¡¯ll pick up whoever¡¯s car you drove here in the morning.¡±

    ¡°Mine,¡± I said, lifting my hand.

    He snorted. ¡°Then it¡¯ll be fine. No one would even think about bothering that hunk of junk.¡±

    ¡°Hey, that¡¯s my baby you¡¯re offending.¡± Even though he was right, it was the crappiest car ever. At least it got me where I wanted to go...most of the time.

    ¡°Oh, God.¡± Aspen moaned and slapped a hand over her mouth. ¡°I think I¡¯m gonna be sick.¡±

    ¡°Shit.¡± Noel leapt over the bar and wrapped an arm around her waist. ¡°I knew I should¡¯ve cut you off sooner. Come on, baby. I¡¯ll help you to the bathroom.¡± As he gently led her away, I sighed after them, jealous of their relationship. With a little moan of depression, I flopped my forehead onto the bar and tried to will my life to a better place.

    When I reminded myself I wasn¡¯t puking my guts out like my best buddy, I felt better. My life could be worse. But then I felt shitty because I shouldn¡¯t be smug that I wasn¡¯t sick and Aspen was. I didn¡¯t realize I was still holding on to my empty glass until someone tried to ease it out of my hand.

    ¡°Oh! Sorry.¡± I sat up, releasing my grip. But the new bartender had already turned away and was walking off with my empty cup. I stared after him, curious, wondering how Pick had found him and what his story was. Then I wondered if he talked. I hadn¡¯t heard him talk once tonight, had I?

    I swear he had the slightest bit of a limp when he moved a certain way. It tugged at my inner healer until I could picture me running my hands up his strong, thick thighs and kissing them all better again.

    And...what the hell? Why did I keep having these overly sexual thoughts about a complete stranger? I never had¡ªcrap! Had someone put something in one of my drinks? Maybe I¡¯d been roofied.

    But, no. That made no sense. Noel had served me all my drinks, and besides, no one had tried to take advantage of me.

    ¡°Hey, Felicity,¡± Mason called from across the bar. I glanced over and was shocked to see the place was empty, and the guys had already cleaned up.

    When the hell had they done that?

    God, just how out of it was I?

    ¡°Huh?¡± I called, waving at him and realizing I had been listening to Asher singing in the background of my consciousness. He always sang after hours during cleanup, which really should¡¯ve clued me in to what had been going on around me.

    ¡°I¡¯m taking off,¡± Mason told me, ¡°but uh, there¡¯s some lady outside, says she knows you.¡±

    ¡°Well, let her in.¡± I waved her forward, even though he hadn¡¯t let her in yet and I couldn¡¯t even see who he was talking about. ¡°I¡¯ll talk to some lady.¡±

    He shrugged. ¡°Okay, then.¡±

    As he left, the unknown woman entered and hurried my way. She had kind of an angry stride, and at first, I had no idea who the hell she was. But then she marched closer, and I suddenly recognized her, even though I¡¯d only seen her once before.

    ¡°Oh, heeeey! Hi.¡± I waved and sent her a huge smile. ¡°You¡¯re that ho-bag who slept with my boyfriend. Sorry, I didn¡¯t recognize you at first, what with your clothes on, and you know, Cam¡¯s penis not inside you.¡±

    I laughed at my joke, but she didn¡¯t seem to find it very funny. Hmm, guess Cam preferred the dryer type.

    Stopping directly in front of my stool, she self-righteously fisted her hands to her hips and glared. ¡°You were trying to have a baby with him?¡±

    ¡°Huh?¡± I cocked my head to the side, having no idea what she was talking about. ¡°You should probably lay off the bad mushrooms, lady. You¡¯re not making any sense.¡±

    ¡°Oh, so you deny it?¡± She whipped a box out of her purse and shoved it in my face. ¡°Explain why this was in our bathroom trash then, bitch.¡±

    I took issue with the bitch reference, but whatever she was sticking in my face smelled really raunchy, probably because she¡¯d pulled it out of a wastebasket.

    ¡°Eww.¡± I shoved it back enough to focus on what it was until I realized it was the box from the first pregnancy test I¡¯d taken days ago.

    ¡°Oh, right. That. No... Good God, no! I was totally not trying to have a baby with him, yuck. But my period was late, so I started to worry, and I took the test, but it¡¯s all good, I¡¯m not. And my period finally came today.¡± Evil karma-striking witch. ¡°So, yeah...whew, huh?¡±

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    I grinned, but still, she didn¡¯t grin back.

    Tough crowd.

    ¡°Whatever,¡± she screeched, and screeching was so not a good sound for her. ¡°You wanted to trick him into marriage and¡ª¡±

    ¡°Marriage?¡± I laughed. ¡°Yeah, right. With Cameron? Give me a frigging break.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m going to scratch your fucking eyes out, whore!¡±

    ¡°Hey, hey, hey,¡± Asher appeared at one side of me, lifting his hands to restore order, and I realized Ten was there too, suddenly at my other side. ¡°I think you need to calm down, ma¡¯am.¡±

    When she sniffed at him, I blinked up his way and shook my head. ¡°I don¡¯t understand why she¡¯s calling me the whore. She¡¯s the one who couldn¡¯t keep her legs together.¡±

    But that only enraged her more. ¡°I¡¯m going to kill you, bitch.¡±

    ¡°Not tonight, you¡¯re not.¡± Ten stepped in, hooked an arm around her waist to keep her from diving at me, which she actually tried to do, and he pulled her a safe distance away.

    I just gaped at her, honestly confused.

    ¡°Seriously?¡± I threw my hands into the air. ¡°The test was neg-a-tive! Why are you so butt hurt over this? I don¡¯t want your disgusting boyfriend. You¡¯re welcome to his cheating ass. If I never see him again for as long as I live, it¡¯ll be too soon. Good riddance to both of you!¡±

    Leaping out of Ten¡¯s arms, she whipped back her arm and slapped me. Hard. I think she whacked me sober. I¡¯m not lying. The moment before her hand went flying, I felt all loopy and happy, still treating this entire conversation like some kind of joke...because it was freaking ridiculous. But now that my cheek was on fire...yeah. Dead sober.

    Scowling at her, I covered my jaw with my hand. ¡°That wasn¡¯t very nice. What is your problem?¡±

    ¡°Don¡¯t you dare talk about Cameron that way. He¡¯s wonderful and¡ª¡±

    She gasped in pain as her head jerked backward. When she tripped away from me, I realized it was because someone had grabbed her hair and was using it as a leash to drag her.

    My mouth fell open when I realized my defender was the new bartender. And he looked pissed. Like scary pissed. Like pissed enough to make you piss your pants if he ever looked that pissed at you.

    ¡°Touch her again and I¡¯ll break your fucking hand,¡± he growled in her ear.

    I gulped. Crap. I think I just pissed myself anyway...and he wasn¡¯t even pissed at me.

    And why did the word piss keep floating through my head?

    Cam¡¯s whore¡ªsorry, I hadn¡¯t been able to concentrate on her name when Cam had said it because at the time, her boobs had been flopping everywhere, distracting me¡ªsqueaked out her fear and slapped at his arm, trying to break free. ¡°What the hell? You can¡¯t talk to me like that. Get your hands off me.¡±

    When she whacked him again and tried to pull away, he let go of her so fast, she lost her balance and fell, landing hard on her ass.

    It would¡¯ve been funny if I weren¡¯t so shocked that he looked so mad, and I had no idea why he even cared.

    Ten and Asher seemed similarly struck.

    ¡°Whoa. Dude.¡± Ten lifted his hands as if disclaiming any part of the confrontation.

    ¡°Uh...¡± Asher glanced between the new guy and the woman. But the woman seemed basically okay as she sputtered and scrambled to her feet.

    ¡°Get out,¡± the new guy said in a voice that made a damn decent Terminator impersonation. It definitely sent a shiver up my spine and had Cam¡¯s woman racing for the door without a backward glance.

    ¡°I can¡¯t...¡± Ten shook his head and backed up a step. ¡°You just manhandled a woman. Dude.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± my savior growled, seemingly confused. ¡°I did not.¡±

    ¡°Well, you...you loomed,¡± Ten stuttered. ¡°And threatened to break her hand.¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s called intimidation. Got her to leave, didn¡¯t it?¡±

    ¡°You pulled her hair,¡± Asher added.

    The stranger seared Asher with a glare. ¡°Because she fucked with the wrong person.¡±

    I sucked in a startled breath. ¡°What?¡±

    The cloth on the back of the new guy¡¯s shirt bunched as his muscles tensed. With no idea why he would feel so protective of me of all people, I froze when he turned his head, just his head, and looked my way.

    I felt electrocuted from such a penetrating stare. It was like my heart seized and all my organs turned to liquid, and yeah...brain zapped dead.

    ¡°Uh...¡± I mumbled.

    I couldn¡¯t read a single thing from his hard stare. Worry? Anger? Disappointment? He didn¡¯t appear to be soft and sympathetic, but there was nothing malicious in his expression either. It was just...intense. It made me instantly wet. My nipples went hard, and a hot, tingling shiver raced over my skin.

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    A vision surged through my brain, of him staring at me with that same, hard penetrating stare as he stalked toward me, pushed me down on top of a nearby table, ripped my clothes apart and spread my legs open before he took me hard and fast and savagely.

    I couldn¡¯t say I was a fan of being dominated, but holy hell if that little daydream didn¡¯t light me up as I¡¯d never been lit up before. My breathing came faster as I stared at him and tried to blink the dirty thoughts from my head.

    Then...just like that, he turned away and strode off, uttering something low to Ten as he passed, something that sounded like, ¡°I¡¯m out.¡±

    He prowled toward the exit like some kind of demonic avenging angel, if there ever was such a thing, who¡¯d just completed his mission and was now leaving because his work was done.

    I gaped after him, stunned by the force of my strange attraction and not sure what to do to about it, but hell...he¡¯d just helped me. And I felt drawn to him, wanting to get closer, even though rationally, I knew I should probably be wary.

    Following my gut, I called, ¡°Hey!¡± before I could stop myself and hurried after him.

    He kept going, ignoring me. I had no idea what to say, but something inside me wouldn¡¯t let me give up the chase. ¡°You,¡± I added stupidly, wincing and wondering if I¡¯d gotten his name earlier.

    He still didn¡¯t stop, so I reached out and grabbed his arm, the warmth and muscle under my hand startling me with how strongly it affected me. He sucked in a breath as if I¡¯d burned him. Then he stopped so fast and whirled back I almost rammed into his ginormous chest. When he jerked out of my grasp, I gulped and drew back quickly, fumbling to catch my balance.

    But Christ, he was tall. And huge. As he towered over me, I shrank farther away, because I wasn¡¯t used to this level of instant attraction.

    His scowl deepened. ¡°What?¡± he said, his voice gritty and raspy and really deep.

    ¡°Umm¡­¡± I tried to say more, but nothing came. So I tried again. ¡°I-I just¡­I wanted to thank you for, you know, helping me. So¡­.¡± I bobbed my head nervously. ¡°Thank you.¡±

    He stared at me for a full second from eyes that looked nearly black. I held my breath, not sure what to do because he wasn¡¯t responding. Then my gaze went to his scar, a single angry red slash bisecting the right side of his face, and I gulped.

    There was something almost friendly and approachable about the scars Ten bore on his face. Maybe it was because he smiled so much. But there was nothing whatsoever approachable about this guy¡¯s one dark mark. Yet, I wanted to approach, get closer, reach out and touch it, maybe kiss it better.

    Exhaling a short breath, he gave a single nod, accepting my gratitude. Then he turned away and dismissed me. Just like that.

    ¡°Wait, I didn¡¯t get your name,¡± I called after him, desperate to try anything to waylay him and figure out what was going on with me, why he affected me so oddly.

    He slowed to a stop, but didn¡¯t turn around. Instead, he grated, ¡°Tight T-shirt Guy¡¯s fine.¡±

    ¡°Oh, shit.¡± Wincing, I slapped my hand to my forehead. ¡°You heard that?¡±

    Not bothering to answer, he left, stalking out the door and disappearing.

    I stared dumbly at the empty doorway, dazed by what had happened. But seriously, ¡°Holy hell.¡±

    ¡°Is it just me,¡± Asher asked, appearing at my side as he also stared at the exit, ¡°or does that guy make you want to piss yourself just a little bit?¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s like you stole the words straight from my mouth,¡± I murmured distractedly.

    Ten joined us, letting out a low whistle. ¡°Damn, Three. You sure made some kind of first impression on Parker. I swear he was going to snap that chick¡¯s neck for fucking with you.¡±

    I swung my face around so fast to gape at him I gave myself whiplash. Not that I felt any pain; I was a bit too busy trying to decide if I¡¯d heard him correctly.

    ¡°Parker?¡± There was no way he could¡¯ve actually said Parker. I had to be hallucinating. I was drunk, my ears were conjuring crazy shit.

    But Ten nodded. ¡°Yeah. Didn¡¯t you hear about the dude who took Blondie to the hospital after she went into labor?¡±

    I frowned, trying to remember the details. ¡°Noel said something about it. Zoey met him at a convenience store or something.¡±

    ¡°And after he dropped her off, he took her car to clean it. Pick and I intercepted him when he was returning it to the hospital. I was ready to kick his ass for touching her car, but Pick actually knew the fucker from school, and get this, he¡¯d just gotten out of prison that day...for rape and murder. Can you fucking believe Pick still hired him after that?¡±

 Page 65

    ¡°No.¡± I shook my head, unable to believe anything I was hearing. ¡°That¡¯s not even possible.¡±

    ¡°I know! Pick¡¯s usually all gung ho to protect everyone. Now he just up and tosses a murderer into the cage with us. What kind of shit is that?¡±

    I wasn¡¯t listening to him anymore, though. I¡¯d turned back to stare at the last place I¡¯d seen the stranger.

    Shaking my head more urgently now, I whispered, ¡°That wasn¡¯t him. That couldn¡¯t have been him.¡±

    No way in hell had the man I¡¯d just encountered been the same eighteen-year-old boy I¡¯d fallen head over heels in love with six years ago. He couldn¡¯t possibly have changed that much, grown that huge. The color of his eyes, the sound of his voice. None of it matched.

    I frowned hard at Ten. ¡°Are you trying to tell me that was Knox Parker?¡±

    Knox couldn¡¯t even be out of prison yet. He should still have over twenty years left, though okay, I¡¯d stopped keeping tabs on his sentence two years ago when he¡¯d murdered Jeremy. I¡¯d given him up completely then. Or at least, that¡¯s what I insisted to myself.

    ¡°How¡¯d you know his first name?¡± Asher wondered as Ten lifted his eyebrows. ¡°You actually know Parker?¡±

    A loud screaming buzz filled my ears as the guys confirmed it.

    I¡¯d just seen Knox again for the first time in six years.

    ¡°Oh my God.¡± I scrambled toward the bar¡¯s exit without thinking.

    The guys called after me, but I kept moving. My brain was still trying to process what I¡¯d just learned while my feet continued to run. I burst into the heavy, cool October night, breathing hard.

    Skidding to a halt, I searched the sidewalks leading from the club, but they looked completely abandoned as every couple of feet a nightlight sprayed down on the wet walkways.

    Panic embraced me. Where had he gone? I couldn¡¯t lose him now, not when he¡¯d been so close. I didn¡¯t even pause to think what I¡¯d say or do if I did catch him; I just knew I had to. Except the place was empty. Not even a car drove by on the street.

    I turned in a slow circle, the desperation in me clawing at my throat, stinging my eyes.

    Where had he gone?

    And then I felt it.

    A stare. It started out tingling the back of my neck until it rocked through my entire nervous system. I could do nothing but feel him watching me. Spotting a dark, deeply shadowed overhang near the edge of the building, I stopped and squinted, but all I could see was black.

    I knew he was there though, hiding from me, probably pressing his back to the wall and holding his breath, hoping I didn¡¯t find him. Except I had no idea why he¡¯d hide from me...why he hadn¡¯t told me who he was.

    I stepped forward and then hesitated. What was I doing, heading toward dark creepy shadows in the middle of the night on a quiet street? Any ominous person could be lurking in there, waiting for me to get close enough to snatch. But then I moved toward it again anyway, unable to stay away.

    ¡°Knox?¡± I said on an unsteady breath just as the door to the bar came open and Noel and Aspen stumbled out, followed by Ten and Asher.

    ¡°Felicity?¡± Noel led his wife my way. ¡°What¡¯re you doing out here? The guys said you had an unpleasant visitor. You okay?¡±

    I glanced one last time to the black shadow before turning back to the group. ¡°Yeah,¡± I managed to say. ¡°I¡¯m fine.¡± Though I wasn¡¯t at all. I was shaken to the core.

    ¡°Are you sure?¡± Aspen asked.

    With a roll of my eyes, I forced a smile. ¡°Of course. What about you, sicko?¡±

    ¡°Ugh.¡± She leaned her head against Noel¡¯s chest and muttered, ¡°I¡¯m better, but still queasy.¡±

    ¡°Come on,¡± Noel urged, tipping his chin up to get me to follow them. ¡°Let¡¯s get her home.¡±

    ¡°Yeah, okay.¡± But I couldn¡¯t turn fully away from the shadow quite yet. As the other four wandered off, across the street, I turned back to it.

    If he didn¡¯t want to talk to me, fine, but I definitely had a message for him. ¡°I don¡¯t understand,¡± I said. Then I hurried after the others.

    Asher looped an arm around my shoulder, tugging me against his side when I caught up to them.

    ¡°You look cold,¡± he said.

    I was. I felt cold all the way to my bones. When I shivered, he hugged me closer with one arm. ¡°Did you find Parker?¡± he asked into my ear.

    I shook my head.

    ¡°Gonna tell me why you chased after him?¡±

    Another fierce head shake.

    He sighed, but said, ¡°All right,¡± and let it drop. ¡°As long as you¡¯re okay.¡±

 Page 66

    ¡°I am,¡± I lied.

    Inside, I fell apart, not sure what was going on or what I was going to do about it.

    ¡°This is crazy,¡± City hissed through the darkened theater.

    I just grinned as I popped a handful of popcorn into my mouth. ¡°What? I¡¯m having fun.¡± Without looking at her, I swung the popcorn tub her way, silently offering her some.

    ¡°Thanks.¡± She looked around the empty aisles as she dug her hand in. Then she leaned toward me and whispered, ¡°We¡¯re going to get caught.¡±

    I leaned toward her as well, because I liked how good she smelled tonight. She¡¯d put on some extra perfume that was driving me crazy. I swear it smelled like one of the wildflowers that grew in the woods, except better because this was layered on top of her natural scent.

    ¡°We won¡¯t get caught,¡± I promised. ¡°I¡¯ll bet money no one else even comes into the theater with us.¡±

    She turned to me, her breath brushing across my cheek. ¡°Why¡¯s that?¡±

    ¡°Because this movie¡¯s about some doll who gets a soul, comes alive, and falls for some video store clerk.¡±

    ¡°Say what?¡±

    I grinned and kept watching the opening credits.

    City nudged me in the ribcage with her knuckle. ¡°What the heck kind of movie did you pick for us?¡±

    Something I wouldn¡¯t feel the least bit distracted by when I made out with my girlfriend through the whole thing.

    ¡°I cannot believe you purposely picked out a bad movie for our very first date.¡±

    Finally, I turned to her. Her brow was puckered with disappointment so I murmured, ¡°Hey,¡± as I gently cupped her cheek. ¡°I know the movie and date were my idea, but I don¡¯t want us to get caught, either. That¡¯s why I took every precaution possible to protect you from trouble. And this...¡± I hitched my chin toward the screen, ¡°was the safest place in public I thought we could go. Besides, the movie¡¯s not what I came to see.¡±

    I could tell the exact moment I¡¯d said the right thing. Her eyes changed, the bright blue turning a liquid azure as her breath caught. When she leaned toward me, I met her halfway, my lips catching hers and my fingers burrowing into her hair. We didn¡¯t come up for air until the characters on the screen started talking...in Japanese.

    ¡°Oh my God!¡± Mouth falling open, City shook her head. ¡°And it¡¯s not even in English?¡±

    I bit my lip. ¡°Well...at least it has subtitles.¡±

    She glanced at me incredulously. I cringed and bit my lip a little harder until we burst into simultaneous laughter.

    The entire plot ended up being even worse than I¡¯d originally thought. The ¡°doll¡± ended up being a life-sized blow-up sex toy. And there were sex scenes. Lots of sex scenes. My grand plans to make out were doused by all the raunchy action happening on the screen. It was like watching a train wreck it was so bad, and both City and I could only gape in horror at some of the plot that went down.

    ¡°I am so sorry.¡± Absolutely mortified, I took her hand and slipped lower in my seat. ¡°We can leave. Let¡¯s leave.¡± I tried to urge her to follow me out of our seats, but she resisted.

    ¡°Are you crazy?¡± She yanked us back down as she continued to watch the movie. ¡°This is my first movie date. Besides...I gotta see how this ends.¡±

    So we ended up staying and watching the entire thing.

    As we left the theater hand in hand a hundred and twenty-five minutes later, she leaned her head onto my shoulder and said, ¡°You know, it really wasn¡¯t that bad of a movie. Underneath all the sex and plastic, and you know, air blowing, it really did cover some deep, meaningful topics. Kind of makes me feel all introspective and think about what¡¯s really important in life.¡±

    I grinned as I shook my head. We stepped into the warm evening air and I led her toward a darker, empty street. Then I leaned into her, burying my face in her hair and inhaling her essence. ¡°You always know how to find the bright side of everything, don¡¯t you? I love that about you.¡±

    She turned to me, her golden smile glittering with warmth. ¡°Know what I love about you?¡± she murmured, brushing her nose against mine.

    I batted mine back. ¡°What?¡±

    ¡°How special you always make me feel.¡±

    I coiled a piece of her red hair around my finger. ¡°You are special.¡±

    Shaking her head, she moved in closer, her breath fanning my lips. ¡°Not to anyone else, I¡¯m not.¡±

    ¡°Then no one else matters.¡± I kissed her softly, then a little deeper. Eventually, our lips parted and tongues brushed.

 Page 67

    My fingers grew restless and body tense with wanting. I moved my touch down the sides of her throat, over the backs of her shoulders, and along her spine until I was gripping her backside and pulling her into me, against every part of me.

    Her arms came around my neck. I was so hard and achy I would¡¯ve taken her right there if she¡¯d let me. But a group of guys passing nearby scared the crap out of us. We broke apart, gasping and gaping at each other.

    When the others passed, unaware of our presence, City bit her lip. Then she reached for my hands. I took both of hers, and she seemed to calm, grinning wildly.

    ¡°So, do you really want to throw caution to the wind and get something to eat together?¡±

    I winced, not wanting to ever tell her no. But... ¡°I can¡¯t.¡± Her face fell, so I rushed to add, ¡°I wish I could, but I¡¯m supposed to meet Mercy in twenty minutes on the square.¡±

    At City¡¯s curious frown, I sighed and rolled my eyes. ¡°Mom wouldn¡¯t let me borrow her car to come into town unless I brought Mercedes too. She said she needed a night out away from the baby.¡±

    ¡°Oh.¡± She bumped her shoulder against mine before she turned and started up the street. ¡°Yeah, I had to catch a ride into town with Max.¡±

    I hurried to catch up so we could walk together. ¡°And he didn¡¯t have a problem dropping you off alone at the movies?¡± When she sent me a strange frown, I added, ¡°I mean, he wasn¡¯t suspicious that you were meeting anyone?¡±

    She grinned. ¡°I told him I was meeting my friend Ada and watching a show with her.¡±

    ¡°Who¡¯s Ada?¡± I cocked my head to the side, trying to recall if she¡¯d ever mentioned her before. ¡°I don¡¯t remember you ever talking about an Ada.¡±

    ¡°Haven¡¯t I? Are you sure? Because she¡¯s one of my favorite authors ever. I thought I¡¯d mentioned all my favorites to you.¡±

    ¡°You mean Ada Frost, or whatever?¡±

    ¡°Yes! I knew I¡¯d told you about her stories. Ryan¡¯s story is supposed to come out next, and I swear I¡¯ve been waiting forever for it. He¡¯s this war hero who gets PTSD, but he also had a really bad past where his dad¡ª¡±

    ¡°City,¡± I said.

    ¡°Hmm?¡±

    ¡°You¡¯re fan-girling.¡±

    She flushed. ¡°Was I?¡±

    ¡°Just a little.¡±

    ¡°Sorry, it¡¯s just...I really like her stories. They come alive to me. Even when I got so mad at Will for what he did in his book, I had to forgive him like a chapter later because of the way Ada wrote his remorse and the reason he had to do it. It was just so¡ª¡±

    I cleared my throat, and she glared at me. ¡°I can¡¯t help it! Once I get started oohing and ahhing over an author, I can¡¯t seem to stop.¡±

    When I laughed, she scowled harder. So I pulled her against me and hugged her. ¡°Actually, I like it. You¡¯re cute when you get all passionate about something.¡±

    She buried her face into my shirt and inhaled deeply. I knew she was smelling me. I liked knowing she appreciated my scent, because I sure as hell appreciated hers. Without thinking, I pressed my nose to her hair and returned the favor.

    ¡°You should¡¯ve seen me the day she wrote me back after I emailed her, telling her I was a fan.¡± She sighed blissfully and hugged me closer. ¡°It was one of the best messages I ever received.¡±

    I chuckled as I rested my cheek on the top of her head. ¡°I bet. But I still can¡¯t believe you lied to your brother.¡± Then I softly sang, ¡°Liar, liar, pants on fire.¡±

    She poked me in the ribs. ¡°Hey, it wasn¡¯t a lie. Ada was so nice and considerate in her letter, I really do consider us friends now. And it just so happens I have my Kindle with me in my purse, and since her stories are uploaded there, that means she was with me...in spirit, anyway.¡±

    Gasping in mock outrage, I narrowed my eyes at her. ¡°I can¡¯t believe you brought a third person¡ªin spirit¡ªto our first date.¡± Then I grinned and pressed my forehead to hers. ¡°Think she¡¯d mind if I kissed my girlfriend goodnight?¡±

    ¡°Pfft. She writes romance. Of course she won¡¯t mind. In fact, I bet if we were good enough at it, she¡¯d even put it in one of her stories¡ª¡± She cut herself off with her own gasp. ¡°Oh my God. That would be so cool.¡±

    I pressed my hand to her lips before she got going on another one of her happy tirades. ¡°Then I guess we¡¯d better make it good.¡±

    Replacing my fingers with my mouth, I kissed my girl and smoothed my hands over her hair, then down her back, up her arms. I cupped her face and deepened things, brushing my tongue across hers and stepping in closer.

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    She moaned and wound her arms around my neck, her fingers toying with the ends of my hair.

    ¡°I never get enough of you,¡± I rasped against her mouth. ¡°Never get enough time with you. I always want more.¡±

    ¡°Me too.¡± She dived back at my mouth, and I kissed her again.

    ¡°Can I just keep you the rest of the night?¡± For the rest of forever.

    Sighing as I sprinkled kisses along her jaw, she finally answered, ¡°What about your sister?¡±

    My groan told her I didn¡¯t want to think about that. I just wanted this moment to last. ¡°Five more minutes,¡± I begged.

    ¡°Sold.¡± She bit my ear, and I almost came in my jeans.

    ¡°God, that was... Do that again.¡±

    Her teeth nipped tender flesh, and I groaned as I backed her against the wall of a building. Then I lifted her so I could fit my hips between her thighs. Her eyes widened but she wrapped her legs around my waist as she gripped my shoulders. I settled against her, my aching erection nudging the very heat of her.

    ¡°Oh my,¡± she murmured, her chest heaving and eyes wide with wonder.

    I knew she liked it, but I asked, ¡°Too much?¡± anyway.

    She whipped her head back and forth. ¡°Not even a little.¡±

    With a grin, I went in for another kiss. This one exploded with tongue and teeth. I ground against her hard and she balled fistfuls of the back of my shirt with her hands as she clamped her thighs around me tight.

    ¡°Knox.¡± Her voice was high and desperate. ¡°I need... I need...¡±

    Fuck, so did I. I needed it bad. I needed all of her, right then.

    ¡°I know. I do too. I want you so¡ª¡±

    ¡°Hey, Bainbridge,¡± a voice called from a distance. ¡°Over here.¡±

    Felicity yelped, and I nearly pissed my pants. She released her legs from me as fast as I dropped her to the ground. Then I spun toward the call and stepped in front of her, protecting her from view.

    ¡°Oh my God. Oh my God,¡± she whimpered against my back, gripping my shirt hard. I held my hand back behind me, catching her hip blindly to reassure her. I¡¯d never let anything bad happen to her.

    When we heard footsteps, we both tensed. I held my breath, and I swear, she did, too.

    Another ten seconds of waiting later, I decided to breathe. Then I whispered, ¡°Whoever it was, I don¡¯t think they were calling to you.¡±

    ¡°What? But... They said Bainbridge. Didn¡¯t they?¡±

    ¡°Yeah.¡± I nodded, still frowning in the direction we¡¯d heard the call. As I crept out of the overhang of a building and down the darkened street toward the end of the block that intersected with a wider, more populated and lit-up boulevard, City clutched my shirt tighter and shadowed my every step. ¡°You said your brother brought you into town, right?¡±

    ¡°Yeah, but... Max? You think Max is this close by?¡±

    I shook my head and slowed my pace to a cautious slink as I neared the intersection. ¡°No idea, but we should probably find out.¡±

    ¡°But¡ª¡± She smashed herself against my spine, shaking as I slowly peeked around the corner. When I saw two people walking toward each other under a street lamp, I released a breath.¡±

    ¡°It is Max,¡± City whispered, making me jump, because for a split second there, I¡¯d forgotten she was with me. I was too busy staring at the girl Max was meeting.

    I glanced at her. ¡°And Mercy,¡± I added.

    ¡°What?¡± She turned her attention to the girl, squinting a moment before her eyes bulged. ¡°Oh my God, it is. But...¡± Shaking her head, she frowned in confusion. ¡°Why is Max meeting her?¡±

    I knew. An image of Bentley rose in my head, her big blue eyes and bright red hair. Yeah, I knew exactly why Max Bainbridge was meeting my sister.

    We¡¯d accused the wrong brother. And Mercedes had never corrected us.

    My muscles tensed as I glared at the boy who¡¯d abandoned her after getting her pregnant. I wanted to storm out there and beat the shit out of the rich, entitled prick.

    But Felicity¡¯s hand on my arm rattled me from my self-righteous rage. ¡°Knox? What¡¯s wrong?¡±

    I shook my head, too busy listening to what the secret lovers down the street had to say to each other.

    ¡°Why did you want to meet, Mercedes?¡± Max¡¯s voice was cool and his gaze hard as he looked at my sister as if she were a cheap piece of trash.

    Mercy lifted her chin and stuck out her chest. ¡°I just wanted to call you a fucking liar to your face. You said you¡¯d help me out if I ever found myself...in trouble.¡±

    Max took an intimidating step closer to her, and my muscles coiled. But City¡¯s restraining hand on my chest stopped me.

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    ¡°I meant an abortion, and you knew it.¡±

    City¡¯s breath exploded, and I realized she¡¯d just caught on. I reached back for her fingers, but I couldn¡¯t find her hand.

    ¡°Well, I decided maybe I wanted the baby, after all.¡±

    Max snorted, ¡°Yeah right. You mean, you decided having the kid would help you get your hands on some Bainbridge money.¡±

    Mercy stepped in closer to him this time. ¡°Well, it should,¡± she spat insistently. ¡°I was your goddamn pussy call for six months, you bastard. I bore your fucking child. I deserve something for that. I deserve half of everything you have.¡±

    With a mocking leer, Max shook his head. ¡°But you won¡¯t get shit. My father will see to it. He doesn¡¯t take kindly to gold-digging whores.¡±

    ¡°You helped make me a whore, prick.¡±

    ¡°Then I guess you shouldn¡¯t go around spreading your legs so much, bitch.¡±

    ¡°Listen here, dick face.¡± She dug her finger into his chest, but he batted it away.

    ¡°Get your dirty hands off me.¡±

    Eyes glittering with hatred, Mercy gritted her teeth. ¡°You certainly weren¡¯t saying that when I had them wrapped around your¡ª¡±

    He caught her wrist and glared back. ¡°In case you didn¡¯t catch the memo, those days are over. I just needed a no-strings-attached fuck, and you wanted to strike it rich through your pussy. I guess neither of us got what we wanted. So I no longer require your services.¡±

    As he turned and strolled away with a cocky saunter that I wanted to kick out from under him, my sister called after him, ¡°You were a sucky lay, anyway, you asshole. Your friend Fred was ten times better.¡±

    When Max ignored her, she stomped her foot. ¡°Damn you, Bainbridge. What the fuck am I supposed to do with a fucking baby? It cries all goddamn day long, and just won¡¯t stop needing shit.¡±

    ¡°Not my fucking problem, Mercedes. I told you I wasn¡¯t having anything to do with a kid. Drown it in a fucking river for all I care.¡±

    City gasped. I didn¡¯t realize I¡¯d stepped from our hiding spot and was stalking toward her asshole brother until she grabbed my shirt and frantically pulled me back to the corner of the building. Reality set in¡ªthe fear of us getting caught and me never seeing her again¡ªand finally, I dashed back with her.

    Once we were hidden from view again, I turned to her, feeling as dazed as she looked. Then I grasped her hand and dragged her deeper into the dark street, my mind racing with everything I¡¯d learned, with all the hate I felt even deeper for the Bainbridge family.

    Once we were far enough away that I felt safe to talk, I paused to wipe my hands over my face. Felicity blew out a breath and hugged herself, rubbing her hands up and down her arms.

    ¡°Your sister,¡± she finally said, ¡°is...awful.¡±

    I gaped at her, unable to believe my ears. ¡°My sister?¡± I hissed. ¡°I think it was your brother who suggested drowning Bentley in a river.¡±

    ¡°But she admitted straight to his face that she was only ever interested in his money. She got pregnant only to get money out of him.¡±

    ¡°And he was only ever interested in fucking her.¡±

    ¡°Well, she should¡¯ve known that about him.¡±

    ¡°Oh?¡± I lifted my eyebrows, unable to believe my ears. ¡°So it was completely impossible for her to believe your brother might¡¯ve actually liked her for her? It had to be about just nothing but sex, huh?¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s not what I¡ª¡±

    ¡°Is that what I should know about you, too? I should stop thinking you might actually like me for me, because no one could ever like a fucking trashy Parker? You¡¯re what, just experimenting with me before you get yourself a real boyfriend, someone who¡¯s actually worthy enough to crawl between your sacred Bainbridge legs?¡±

    With a gasp, City visibly flinched and jerked away from me.

    I opened my mouth, unable to believe what had just rolled off my tongue. Regret ran like acid through my veins. I wished I could grab the words from the air and shove them back in my mouth, deep into my throat so she¡¯d never heard such a vile, crude accusation, so they¡¯d never existed, so I wouldn¡¯t have even thought them.

    I gaped at her, my skin turning cold with fear, not sure how to even begin to apologize.

    She shook her head before I could formulate a response. ¡°That¡¯s not what I meant.¡± Her voice trembled and tears sparkled in her eyes. I fisted my hand, bringing it to my mouth, so ashamed of myself I almost started crying, too. ¡°I wasn¡¯t trying to say Mercy shouldn¡¯t have assumed he might really like her. But she should¡¯ve also known...well, he¡¯s a teenage boy. Everyone knows the only thing they want is sex.¡±

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    ¡°I¡¯m a teenage boy,¡± I whispered, begging her to forgive me with my eyes. ¡°Do you think all I want from you is sex?¡±

    ¡°No, of course not.¡± Narrowing her eyes, she fisted her hands at her side and snarled, ¡°I¡¯m a Bainbridge. You probably want money too.¡±

    Then she whirled away and stalked off.

    My mouth fell open, unable to believe she¡¯d said that.

    As parting shots went, that one had to be the best. It left me pummeled in the chest and short of air. I couldn¡¯t believe she truly thought I was only with her because¡ª

    No, that didn¡¯t make sense. We¡¯d spent too much time together this summer, shared too many of our innermost thoughts and feelings. My City wasn¡¯t like that.

    The girl who¡¯d hissed such an accusation had been a complete stranger.

    Fisting my hands and clenching my teeth, I shook my head, refusing to let it go at that. I was going to make her admit she¡¯d been lying. I was going to force her to forgive me for my idiocy, and everything was going to be fine again, damn it.

    But when I got the end of the block and turned a corner, I stopped short when I saw her down the street, sitting at a bus stop bench and bawling her eyes out.

    My chest squeezed tight as I watched the misery pour out of her. I¡¯d caused this by flying off the handle in defense of Mercy. I¡¯d made my favorite person on earth cry.

    I almost fled in shame, worried everything was over. She¡¯d never forgive me. We¡¯d never be the same again, and what had started as the best summer of my life was going to end the worst.

    Her sobbing got to me, though. Unable to let her cry alone, I went to her and sat on the opposite end of the bench from her. For a minute, I didn¡¯t speak as she continued to cry into her hands. I shoved my hands into my pockets and squeezed my eyes shut, wishing I could travel back into the past five minutes and not be such an ass.

    Then I blew out a breath. ¡°I didn¡¯t mean it,¡± I said, my voice cracking on the words. ¡°You know that, right? I was just upset, and defensive, and scared out of my mind that watching them was like some kind of awful preview of how we might turn out. I don¡¯t know why I said it. It was so stupid. I felt sick as soon as the words came out. I thought I was going to puke. And I thought there was no way you¡¯d ever forgive me. I¡¯ll understand if you don¡¯t, but I¡¯m still sorry. I am so, soo....¡±

    Slowly reaching out, I grazed my hand experimentally over her elbow to judge her response.

    When she turned my way, I released a breath and gripped her arm before hauling her down the bench and into my lap.

    ¡°Sorry,¡± I whispered into her ear.

    She curled into my chest and buried her face in my neck while her arms banded tight around me. I exhaled the most relieved breath ever. But having her turn to me for comfort after I¡¯d been the one who hurt her broke me.

    My eyes filled with tears. ¡°I¡¯m so damn sorry,¡± I repeated.

    ¡°I am too.¡± She sniffed. ¡°I didn¡¯t mean what I said about you either, but I did say it on purpose. I wanted to hurt you the way you hurt me.¡±

    I rested my cheek against her hair. ¡°It worked.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Knox. I shouldn¡¯t have¡ª¡±

    ¡°No. I started it. I deserved it.¡±

    ¡°No, Max and Mercedes started it. They went for each other¡¯s throats, and we took sides...against each other.¡±

    I didn¡¯t answer, still upset over how easily I¡¯d struck out at her. She had become the most important, precious person to me, and I¡¯d hurt her. I never, ever wanted to hurt her.

    The urge to vomit rose again, but City¡¯s fingers in my hair soothed me. I pulled my nose from her hair to look her in the eye. ¡°I don¡¯t even know why I was so defensive of Mercy. She certainly isn¡¯t a saint. And tricking a pregnancy out of your brother to get some money from him was awful.¡±

    ¡°I was no better. What Max said was worse than horrible. I mean, I have never seen him like that. He¡¯s always been the nice, protective brother. He¡¯s never said anything so crude or heartless to me before.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s because you¡¯re like him.¡±

    When she pulled away to look up at me, her eyes wide, she asked, ¡°Is that how you see me, too? Like him?¡±

    I closed my eyes and shook my head. ¡°No. You¡¯re just...you¡¯re you, not a part of that at all, and I shouldn¡¯t have accused you of thinking like him. I was wrong. I was so wrong.¡±

    ¡°Shh.¡± She pressed two fingertips to my lips. ¡°It¡¯s over. We both apologized, admitted we were wrong, and our siblings were wrong, and the entire situation was messed up. But now it¡¯s done, and I forgive you, and¡­you forgive me, right?¡±

 Page 71

    I blinked, unprepared for the uncertain glance she sent me. ¡°Of course, I forgive you.¡± There¡¯d never been any question of that. I couldn¡¯t even breathe when I merely thought of her not being in my life anymore. I loved this girl with everything inside me; I didn¡¯t think it would be possible to not forgive her...for anything.

    A grin bloomed across her face. ¡°Good. Then everything¡¯s fine again.¡±

    But I couldn¡¯t share her smile. I was still scared, even more scared now than I¡¯d been before. We¡¯d just survived our first fight. We¡¯d worked through our problems, despite hurt feelings, because we cared so much about each other. That was a sign of commitment, of something deeper and binding. And yet, I had no idea how a future between us was going to work.

    ¡°So where do we go from here?¡± I asked, making her frown.

    ¡°What do you mean?¡±

    I shook my head. ¡°We chanced too much tonight. If your brother, or anyone, had seen us together, that would¡¯ve been it. Your family would tear you away from me, and I¡¯d fight to get back with you, and a freaking bloodbath would happen. Neither of our families are reasonable when it comes to each other. We¡¯re not even reasonable when it comes to our families. We can¡¯t let them know about us. We can¡¯t let anyone know, and we can¡¯t ever meet in public like this again. It¡¯s too risky.¡±

    Her blue eyes were full of fear as she whispered, ¡°What¡¯re you saying?¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m saying it¡¯s back to the woods. We only meet in the forest, and we keep this a secret until...¡±

    ¡°Until when?¡±

    I sighed and pressed my forehead to hers. ¡°I don¡¯t know. Until we¡¯re old enough to get out on our own and support ourselves, I guess. Until our parents have no custody over us and we can finally be together openly, where they can¡¯t make any legal issues about it to keep us apart.¡±

    ¡°You mean, until my parents have no more rights to keep you away from me? Because you¡¯re already eighteen, an adult in the eyes of the law. This is all about waiting on me? It¡¯ll be two years and three weeks before I¡¯m eighteen.¡±

    ¡°Actually.¡± I winced. ¡°I was thinking we should wait until you get through college and get the degree you want first.¡±

    Her jaw fell open. ¡°Are you insane?¡±

    I held up a hand. ¡°Just hear me out. If you hooked up with me as soon as you turned eighteen, they might disown you and take away...I don¡¯t know, inheritance shit, like paying for your college. I don¡¯t want you to lose out on that. There¡¯s no way I could support us and pay for your college.¡±

    ¡°But¡ª¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m not taking your education from you. Your psychology doctorate. That is your dream, City. And I want you to reach it.¡±

    ¡°And what if my dream includes having you in my life now?¡±

    Relief washed over me as I cupped her face. ¡°Baby, I¡¯m not going anywhere. You are stuck with me. But if the only safe way I can see you right now is a few stolen hours here and there in the woods, then it¡¯s worth it.¡±

    Her eyes searched mine for a good ten seconds before she nodded and offered me a tremulous smile. ¡°Okay, then,¡± she said. ¡°It¡¯s worth it to me too.¡±

    It was barely light out the next morning as I hammered my fist against Pick¡¯s front door.

    Full of nothing but memories and questions, I hadn¡¯t slept much the night before. I just tossed and turned on my borrowed bed. Around four in the morning, ten-year-old Colton joined me, crawling under the covers and trembling as he curled against me.

    When I asked him what was wrong, all he mumbled was, ¡°nightmare,¡± so I let it be and tucked him in tighter.

    He dropped off again almost immediately, but I was left wide awake. About an hour or so later, I rose for the day, left a note so as not to alarm anyone, and snuck from the Gambles¡¯ house before they stirred. Since we¡¯d abandoned my car at Forbidden, I walked there to pick it up, thinking the fresh morning air would help me think, but it so didn¡¯t. When I reached my car, the tire was freaking flat. Figured. So I kept walking to Pick¡¯s place.

    I¡¯m not even sure what thoughts rattled through my brain. I felt like a numb piece of brittle wood that could shatter at any moment.

    Movement from the inside of Pick¡¯s apartment had me straightening my back and wiping at my face as I drew in a deep breath. Then the door came open.

    Pick¡¯s hair was a mess. He rubbed at his bleary eyes and added a yawn to it as he stretched. The sleepy, just crawled out of bed look kicked ass on him, but I couldn¡¯t even appreciate the splendid male scenery.

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    Yeah, that¡¯s how rattled and messed up my brain was.

    When he saw me, he dropped his hand. ¡°Felicity. Christ, woman, I have been trying to reach you for days.¡± He grabbed my elbow and tugged me inside the apartment. ¡°I called your phone but it was dead. Went by your apartment, but¡ª¡±

    ¡°Yeah, I don¡¯t live there anymore.¡±

    He blew out a tired breath. ¡°So I learned. When Noel mentioned you were staying with them, I stopped by the Gamble house last night, but the boys said Aspen had taken you out.¡±

    ¡°She took me to Forbidden,¡± I said in a wooden voice. ¡°Hoping to help me drink my worries away.¡±

    ¡°Shit,¡± he breathed, his gaze searching my face. ¡°You know, then.¡±

    ¡°Know what?¡± I threw up my hands as my voice went high. ¡°That some guy who everyone is calling Knox Parker was just released from prison, only to save Zoey and her new baby¡¯s life and then became the newest bartender at the club where I just happen to work?¡±

    ¡°I tried to tell you. I swear to God, the very day I came across him, you were the first person I tried to contact. Goddamn, you know you¡¯re supposed to notify your boss when you have a change of address, right?¡±

    I scowled. ¡°Well, when I actually get a new address, you¡¯ll be the first person I tell. Okay, boss?¡±

    He sighed and scrubbed his face again. Then he crossed his arms over his chest and inspected my face. ¡°How¡¯re you dealing with all this? You okay?¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know. I don¡¯t¡ª¡± My voice cracked and then wavered and I had to hug myself. ¡°I have no idea what to feel or think, or do. I don¡¯t understand anything. All I know is that stranger last night was not Knox.¡±

    Sympathy filled Pick¡¯s gaze. ¡°Changed a lot, hasn¡¯t he?¡±

    ¡°Changed?¡± I snorted. ¡°The two aren¡¯t even the same person. They can¡¯t be. How is he even out so soon?¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know. He didn¡¯t tell me.¡±

    ¡°Did you ask?¡±

    ¡°No. I didn¡¯t want to push. I was hoping he¡¯d come to trust me enough to tell me himself.¡±

    ¡°Except Knox doesn¡¯t work like that. You have to coax his problems out of him.¡±

    ¡°Honey, I don¡¯t think the Jaws of Life could crack that man open right now.¡±

    My shoulders slumped. ¡°What happened to him, Pick?¡±

    Pulling me to him, he hugged me and sighed into my hair. ¡°My guess is nothing good.¡±

    Tears filled my eyes and I clung to his shirt. ¡°I didn¡¯t even know who he was. The entire night passed, and he didn¡¯t once tell me or do anything to help me remember. When they finally told me his name after he¡¯d left, I tried to follow him, but I swear to God, he hid from me. Why would he hide from me?¡±

    ¡°He¡¯s dealing with a lot of demons right now, and I think you¡¯re the last person he wants to see him fighting them.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s bullshit.¡± Gritting my teeth, I jerked out of Pick¡¯s arms to scowl. ¡°I¡¯ve seen him at his worst before, and I was the one to help him work through it. Why doesn¡¯t he know I would help him again?¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know, Felicity. It¡¯s been a long time. Maybe he thinks...¡± Letting me fill in that blank for myself, he shrugged and sent me a helpless look.

    But I had no idea what he was suggesting, so I growled. ¡°He thinks what?¡±

    ¡°The first thing he heard about you was that you¡¯d been living with some other guy. After that, why would he assume you two would just pick up where you¡¯d left off?¡±

    I hiccupped out a strange sounding sob, hating that Knox knew I¡¯d moved on...tried to move on...whatever. If he knew I¡¯d lived with someone else, then he surely knew I¡¯d had sex¡ª

    Nausea rolled through me.

    ¡°He wouldn¡¯t even talk to me,¡± I choked out. And no wonder. I¡¯d had sex with other men. I hadn¡¯t recognized him when I¡¯d seen him. I¡¯d made fun of his T-shirt, and he¡¯d heard me.

    I had to be the worst girlfriend ever.

    Wait. Gasping as that word ran through my brain, I realized we¡¯d technically never broken up. He¡¯d been ripped away from me and thrown in jail, and I thought I¡¯d never see him again. But if we¡¯d never really broken up...did that mean we were still together? Was I a cheater?

    God, I was worse than Cam.

    ¡°What am I going to do, Pick?¡±

    He shook his head. ¡°I don¡¯t know, sweetheart.¡±

    When he opened his mouth as if to offer the best advice in the world, one of his kids toddled into the room.

 Page 73

    Julian lit up when he saw me. ¡°Buh buh.¡± Opening his arms, he hurried forward.

    My heart melted at his greeting, so I swept him up and hugged him to me, rubbing my nose against his hair. ¡°Hey, there, handsome man. You¡¯re a sight for sore eyes.¡±

    ¡°Buh buh,¡± he repeated, pressing his chubby palms against my cheeks. ¡°Buh buh.¡±

    ¡°Okay, okay,¡± I caved. ¡°You want bubbles, I got it. You know, you¡¯re lucky I remembered to bring some this time.¡±

    I fished a piece of gum from my pocket, and Julian babbled eagerly as I unwrapped it and stuck it in my mouth.

    ¡°Buh buh. Buh buh.¡±

    ¡°Give me a second to chew, kid.¡± I chomped as fast as I could to soften the gum. ¡°I¡¯ll get you a bubble.¡±

    Pick leaned his back against the wall and stuck his hands in his pockets as he watched us, smiling and shaking his head. ¡°You¡¯re just as bad as everyone else with spoiling my kids.¡±

    ¡°Whatever. There¡¯s no such thing as spoiling a baby this cute. Isn¡¯t that right, handsome?¡± Layering the gum over my tongue, I blew a bubble, and Julian squealed with glee as he slapped his hand over my mouth, popping it.

    We went through the whole chewing, blowing, popping thing again a few times before Pick pushed away from the wall and yawned, rubbing his chest through his shirt. ¡°I¡¯m going to make some coffee. Want some?¡±

    ¡°Uh...okay.¡± Carrying Julian, I followed Pick into his kitchen, and it finally hit me how quiet the place was. Yeesh, I must¡¯ve been a bit too preoccupied with Knox to even think of anything else. ¡°Is Eva not home?¡±

    ¡°She took Skylar with her to the store to get some clothes for Parker.¡±

    I paused, still unsettled to hear that name so much for the first time in years.

    ¡°The girls have always been early risers; they like to get all the shopping done before we guys even roll out of bed,¡± he was saying as he pulled down coffee filters and a can of ground beans.

    ¡°Clothes?¡± was all I could think to utter.

    He glanced back and lifted an eyebrow. ¡°Yeah. Clothes. He had nothing when I found him at the hospital on Wednesday. He¡¯d only just then gotten free maybe an hour before. He wasn¡¯t even aware his old house had burned down or, you know, anything about his family.¡±

    I gasped and sank into the nearest chair I found. Julian patted my cheeks again, demanding another bubble, so I blew one without thinking. ¡°He really didn¡¯t know? About anyone? No one notified him at all when practically his entire family died?¡±

    ¡°Nope. And it really sucked being the bearer of bad news.¡±

    ¡°Oh God. That¡¯s where he met Zoey, wasn¡¯t it? At the convenience store where his house used to be?¡±

    Pick nodded. ¡°Yep.¡±

    I hugged Julian close to me. ¡°Poor Knox.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s basically how I felt. The guy had just done a good deed for our Zoey, all the while he was homeless, broke, and had no family left to go to.¡± He shrugged. ¡°I brought him back here, and we stuffed him in one of my shirts to work at the bar last night, but it didn¡¯t fit him well, so Tink¡¯s taken it upon herself to make sure he¡¯s properly clothed.¡±

    A little swirl of jealousy curled through me, hating that Eva was taking care of him, and I wasn¡¯t. Then I winced and bit my lip, feeling more terrible than I had last night about the tight T-shirt comment I¡¯d made. Crap, forget worst girlfriend, I had to be the worst person ever. But then something else Pick had said flittered to the surface.

    ¡°Wait. You brought him here? As in here?¡± I pointed to the floor and sat up straighter, glancing around. ¡°He¡¯s staying here, with you guys?¡±

    ¡°Except he didn¡¯t come home last night after work,¡± he answered me before I could ask. ¡°So... I don¡¯t know where he is at the moment.¡±

    When a soft tap came to the apartment door, I gasped. I don¡¯t know how I knew, but I knew. It was Knox. I lurched to my feet and glanced around wildly, thinking there had to be a way to prepare. I probably looked like shit with my hair uncombed and the first clothes I¡¯d snagged in the dark to change into. I hadn¡¯t even had my first cup of coffee for the day.

    But everything was happening regardless.

    Pick was leaving the kitchen to answer the knock, so I rushed after him. His body blocked my view as he opened the door, but I could tell from the set of his shoulders and how he let out a relieved breath who he was greeting.

    ¡°So you decided to come back.¡±

    ¡°I guess I really don¡¯t have anywhere else to go.¡± The low, gravelly voice I¡¯d heard the night before filled the apartment and made me shiver.

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    ¡°Well, come on in.¡±

    Pick stepped back and opened the door wider. Still wearing the same tight black T-shirt from the night before, Knox kept his face lowered and took a step forward, until he looked up and saw me.

    He jerked back into the hallway, and seared Pick with an accusing glance. ¡°What¡ª?¡±

    Pick lifted his hands, claiming innocence. ¡°She just showed up. I had no idea she was coming by.¡±

    I gaped at Pick for taking Knox¡¯s side, as if he wouldn¡¯t have let me in if he¡¯d known I was coming over, or if Knox had been here. And why the hell did Knox not want to see me?

    Clenching my teeth as hurt anger filled my veins, I narrowed my eyes.

    How dare he? How dare he run from me after six years, after I waited for him for most of that time, and missed him, and kept loving him? How dare he not even want to see me?

    I marched forward, thrusting Julian at his father as I kept my gaze fixed on Knox. ¡°Excuse us a minute.¡± Grabbing the door, I pulled it shut behind me and closed it in Pick¡¯s face as he scrambled to catch his kid.

    But once I was alone in the hallway with the stranger claiming to be Knox, my anger died.

    The uncertainty grew.

    He¡¯d changed so much. His hair was shaved close; it made his head appear to be shaped different. The beard scruff he sported hid a lot, but I could still tell he¡¯d grown some harder angles to his jaw and cheekbones.

    Though his face had lost some baby fat and grown lean, his body mass had practically doubled. And it was all muscle, pure, steel bulging muscle. They were so freaking big, they seemed to obstruct his mobility until he didn¡¯t move quite as smoothly as he used to.

    Nothing, absolutely nothing looked the same, except maybe the eyes. I hadn¡¯t gotten a very good look at them in the darkness of the bar last night, but what I¡¯d seen of them then had made them appear black.

    Now, in the full light, they were brown again and I could finally recognize some of my Knox, except only the color and shape were the same. They kind of had a dead expression to them now, or maybe severely broken, like something in him was damaged beyond repair.

    Pain deep in my stomach knotted my guts into tight bundles.

    What the hell had he been through?

    My gaze moved back up to his face. ¡°I didn¡¯t recognize you last night,¡± was all I could think to say.

    It felt like the stupidest comment in the world, but what else was I supposed to say? Hey, long time no see? I missed you like crazy? I still think about you every day? I can¡¯t seem to stop loving you, no matter how hard I try?

    Yeah, so not going to happen.

    ¡°I noticed,¡± he said, and God, even his voice was all wrong. There were little hoarse gaps, making it gravelly and deep.

    I swallowed, unable to read him at all. He didn¡¯t sound rude...or sweet, for that matter. He was just...indifferent.

    Which killed me.

    There was nothing inside me indifferent about seeing him. I was a disaster. My heart thumped with all kinds of crazy, my palms sweated with nerves, and my arms ached to reach for him, to just...hug him.

    It¡¯d been six years since he¡¯d hugged me, and no one hugged the way Knox Parker hugged.

    This was just freaking unbelievable. Knox was standing in front of me, in the flesh, and I couldn¡¯t hug him.

    ¡°So, I hear you¡¯ve been out since Wednesday.¡±

    He glanced away, as if he were disinterested in our conversation.

    His response devastated me in multiple ways. But at least he wasn¡¯t running off and hiding anymore. He was still here, letting me look at him, and talk to him.

    The last time I¡¯d seen him¡ªexcluding last night, which didn¡¯t count because I hadn¡¯t realized who he was¡ªhe¡¯d held me desperately close and whispered his love to me.

    I¡¯d been fully ready to wait his four-year sentence for him. Except that sentence had been extended another thirty.

    Which led to another reason I was crushed.

    ¡°How are you free this soon?¡± He wasn¡¯t supposed to be free this soon.

    His gaze finally lifted to mine, his dark brown eyes bruised with pain. ¡°I don¡¯t know. They let me out on parole, I guess.¡±

    I laughed, but the sound morphed into a sob. But Parole? Parole was causing all this? Why hadn¡¯t I thought of parole?

    Slapping my hand over my mouth, I bit my lip as hard as I could to quell the tears I could feel forming. When I was able to finally control some of my emotions, I dropped my hand.

    ¡°So, I, uh...¡± I let out a shaky laugh and brushed the hair out of my face. ¡°I have so many questions.¡± When he looked away again, my nerves went haywire. ¡°You want to get out of here? Go somewhere to talk?¡±

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    He took a sudden interest in his feet and mumbled something that sounded a lot like, ¡°No.¡±

    My jaw dropped. ¡°Excuse me? Did you just say no?¡±

    He shrugged. ¡°I just don¡¯t see the point.¡±

    I shook my head, my mind utterly blown.

    ¡°The point in what? In talking? But...what?¡± Was he insane? ¡°It¡¯s been six years. There¡¯s like a million things to catch up on. We need to talk.¡±

    A muscle in his jaw twitched, the one and only sign I¡¯d gotten so far that this encounter might in any way be difficult for him. But then he hitched up one shoulder. ¡°I don¡¯t have anything to say.¡±

    ¡°How could you not...but what about...oh my God! Of course we have shit to say. We never even officially broke up.¡±

    ¡°We¡¯re broken up,¡± he told his feet.

    I almost clutched my heart because it felt as if he¡¯d just stabbed it. Gaping, I shook my head. ¡°Can you look me in the eye when you tell me that?¡±

    He lifted his tortured brown eyes. ¡°I don¡¯t want to talk,¡± he said softly.

    I wanted to pull my hair and scream. I wanted to hit him in the chest with both of my fists.

    No, I just wanted to grab him hard and yank him against me and kiss him, hug him, force him to admit he missed me just as hard as I¡¯d missed him and that he was happy to see me.

    But he only looked away.

    The bastard couldn¡¯t even watch as he broke my heart.

    My pain snapped into rage. ¡°Well, I do! You might not have anything to say, but I have plenty. The last time I saw you, you swore you didn¡¯t blame me for what happened.¡±

    He still refused to look at me, but his dark eyebrows furrowed in confusion. ¡°I don¡¯t.¡±

    ¡°Then why are you treating me like this?¡±

    He squeezed his eyes closed and bowed his head as regret passed over his features. It was the most emotion he¡¯d shown me in six years.

    Hope flared inside me. This was it. Finally, he was going to open up to me and talk about...whatever was causing this inhuman behavior of his.

    But, nope. False alarm. He turned away to head down the hall away from Pick¡¯s apartment, saying something in his gravelly voice that sounded like, ¡°I can¡¯t do this.¡±

    ¡°Do what?¡± I demanded, utterly confused and dogging his steps. ¡°Why can¡¯t you just talk to me? What did I do to make you hate me? Why wouldn¡¯t you even see me when I came to visit you in prison?¡±

    He stopped in his tracks, and tipped his head to the side as if to put his ear toward me to hear better. ¡°You came? To the prison?¡±

    ¡°Of course.¡± A tear slipped down my cheek, but I didn¡¯t care about hiding it from him this time. ¡°The first freaking chance I had. I was there the day I turned eighteen and was a legal adult.¡±

    I¡¯d finally been allowed visitation rights without parental consent. And the only thing I¡¯d wanted for my birthday was to see his face. I would¡¯ve been happy for only a few minutes as long as I could¡¯ve gotten the chance to smile at him and tell him again that I still loved him. That I was still waiting for him.

    It had broken my heart when the guard had turned me away.

    A dark cloud passed over Knox¡¯s face. ¡°Your birthday? I wasn¡¯t...¡± He flinched, but then continued. ¡°I wasn¡¯t allowed visitors that day.¡±

    I opened my mouth to ask, but that haunted pallor on his face made me close my mouth, hoping he¡¯d tell me.

    He didn¡¯t, of course.

    Sighing, I decided maybe I needed to be the one to open up before he would. I had no idea what had happened to him to change him this much, but I was determined to find out.

    So I laid all my cards on the table, face up. ¡°I waited for you,¡± I confessed.

    Slowly, he looked up, his brown eyes a little glossy and wet.

    ¡°I waited for you for four years with no word from you whatsoever. And I would¡¯ve waited more...until two weeks before you were supposed to be released, I learned you¡¯d killed two people. And one of them just happened to be the son of my father¡¯s lawyer.¡±

    He didn¡¯t react at all. No regret, no anger, no explanation, no nothing.

    I lifted my hands in frustrated defeat. ¡°And suddenly those two weeks left to wait became thirty more years.¡± My voice broke. ¡°I couldn¡¯t wait thirty years, Knox.¡±

    His eyes were sad when they shifted my way. ¡°You shouldn¡¯t have even waited four.¡±

    I sniffed. ¡°No, I guess I shouldn¡¯t have. You kept us apart by killing him. You know that, right? When you showed me that your need for vengeance meant more to you than getting out to be with me, you slaughtered everything we could¡¯ve had together. You are the one who kept us apart.¡± Shaking hard, I wrapped my arms around my chest, hugging myself. ¡°I just hope it was worth it for you.¡±

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    The bastard remained mute. I¡¯d just spewed stuff at him I didn¡¯t even believe to get a reaction from him, but he merely stood there, a complete freaking stone with zero emotion.

    I sniffed, unable to believe him. Frustrated, pissed, and heartbroken, I spun away and stormed down the apartment hall.

    I made it around the corner and into the stairwell before I slid down onto the top step and bawled, burrowing my face into my hands as the misery consumed me.

    The Knox I¡¯d known would¡¯ve found me. He wouldn¡¯t have been able to handle my tears. He would¡¯ve sat beside me, and talked to me, and hugged me until everything was okay again.

    But the stranger I¡¯d just walked away from stayed away.

    So I cried even harder because it was finally hitting me that the boy I¡¯d once loved was truly, horribly gone.

    I hated the days she came late. Actually, I hated it when she couldn¡¯t show at all. But those didn¡¯t happen very often. Usually, her family paid her as much attention as my family paid me, and she could come out into the woods without anyone knowing or caring.

    But I always stressed through every hour she didn¡¯t show. What if she was hurt, or her family had found out, or she¡¯d changed her mind and decided sneaking around with me wasn¡¯t worth it after all? Then I got to thinking that it might be best if she did give up on me, because I started to imagine the future, and it didn¡¯t just have me in it. I had to think about her. And a future with her in it looked sad, because I had no idea how to take care of her.

    Before, the idea of just being a drifter and picking up any spare job I found would¡¯ve been fine. Now, though, now I needed something secure, something permanent, something good enough to take care of both of us if I had to. No way in hell was I going to turn out like my dad and sponge off my woman, letting her break her back to bring in all the money and raise all the kids. I was going to be a man City could be proud to call hers.

    Which only freaked me out more, because I had no idea how to become that person.

    When I heard footsteps coming, jerking me from my panic, I jumped up, relieved. The dock swayed under me as I loped down the ramp to meet her on the shore.

    ¡°Hey.¡± I grinned as soon as she cleared the trees in her sandals and shorts and short-sleeve shirt. Her hair was bound up in a ponytail today, but I knew I could have it down and in my hands before the afternoon was over.

    ¡°Hey,¡± she said back, though her voice sounded distracted and her gaze seemed elsewhere. When she hugged herself, I frowned.

    ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡±

    She was shaken. I didn¡¯t think I¡¯d ever seen her this upset before, like scared and troubled upset.

    I took her shoulders in my hands. She tried to smile, but her lips trembled. Her hands shook slightly as she gripped my forearms and stepped up onto her toes to kiss me.

    But I pulled back. ¡°City?¡± Maybe her brother Max had seen us together.

    It¡¯d only been the night before that we¡¯d listened in on him and Mercedes giving secret relationships such a bad name. Maybe he¡¯d been too distracted to say anything then, but today he had. Maybe... I don¡¯t know.

    I¡¯d been anxious all day, still worried that City might turn around and decide not to forgive me for the things I¡¯d said to her. I continued to feel awful about it, and I certainly hadn¡¯t forgiven myself. That¡¯s why I¡¯d been so impatient to see her again today, for reassurance that we were okay.

    ¡°It¡¯s nothing,¡± she said, shaking her head as she sent me another fake smile.

    ¡°Don¡¯t lie to me. Something has you rattled.¡±

    She sighed as if disgusted by my persistence, but then she closed her eyes and dove at me, burrowing into my chest.

    ¡°It¡¯s stupid,¡± she mumbled.

    ¡°I don¡¯t care if it¡¯s the most idiotic thing in the world. It¡¯s bothering you, and I want to know what¡¯s going on.¡± I scooped her up into my arms and began to carry her.

    Tightening her arms around my neck, she clung to me with a gasp. ¡°Where¡¯re we going?¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m taking you to the tree. That seems to be where we talk best...and make out less.¡±

    She grinned, and her eyes lit with amusement. ¡°I seem to remember one very steamy kiss at that tree.¡±

    I snorted. ¡°I said make out less, not at all. You really think I¡¯m going to let you go today without getting my tongue down your throat at least once?¡±

    ¡°My, my, Knox Parker. You certainly do have a way with words.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m a teenage boy, remember. Sex might not be the most important thing I want from you, but oh, it¡¯s always on the dream list.¡±

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    ¡°Really?¡± She looked hopeful, which probably wasn¡¯t good for my libido because my dick went instantly hard and turned just as hopeful as she looked.

    ¡°I¡¯m going to pretend you didn¡¯t just ask that. And here we are. The trouble tree.¡±

    ¡°The trouble tree?¡±

    As I leaned my back against it and slid down to the root base with her in my lap, I nodded. ¡°Yep. It seems to be the tree where we come to shed all our troubles.¡±

    Her smile was soft. ¡°I like that.¡±

    I nuzzled my nose to hers. ¡°I figured you might. Now, talk, little girl. Or I¡¯ll tickle it out of you.¡±

    She sighed and rested her head on my shoulder. ¡°I won¡¯t be able to make it out here tomorrow. It¡¯s the big cotillion day.¡±

    I stroked her hair and wound a coiled lock around my finger. ¡°Yeah, I¡¯ve seen flyers for that. I thought it was in the evening, though, when I¡¯ll be working.¡±

    ¡°It is, but Mom is having a photographer come over to take my picture in our gazebo at noon. I have to get into my dress and put on my makeup and everything for it.¡± She made a face, but I smiled.

    ¡°I bet you¡¯ll look beautiful.¡±

    She rolled her eyes. ¡°I always feel like a poodle at a dog show whenever the cotillion rolls around. It¡¯s the only time my mother really pays attention to me.¡±

    ¡°And this is what has you worried?¡± I asked, not buying it.

    She sighed. ¡°No. But I was hoping it would divert your attention enough to forget about it.¡±

    ¡°I won¡¯t ever stop worrying about what¡¯s bugging you until I know you¡¯re better.¡±

    ¡°But it¡¯s really¡ª¡±

    ¡°Stupid. I know. Now lay it on me.¡±

    ¡°Fine. My father¡¯s lawyer came to lunch today.¡±

    ¡°Okay,¡± I pressed.

    ¡°And he brought his family with him, including his...son.¡±

    ¡°Tad?¡± I¡¯d heard her talk about how her father¡¯s lawyer¡¯s son was her brother Garrett¡¯s best friend, and how they were nearly inseparable.

    ¡°No, the other son,¡± she whispered. ¡°The younger one. Jeremy. He¡¯s my age, but since they live up north, they go to Ellamore, not Southside with us.¡±

    I nodded, ready to murder this Jeremy guy for whatever he¡¯d done. ¡°And?¡±

    ¡°And nothing.¡± She groaned and flopped her head onto my shoulder. ¡°That¡¯s why it¡¯s so stupid. He didn¡¯t do anything, he¡¯s just always given me the heebie jeebie creeps. My skin crawls every time he looks at me. And today¡ª¡±

    When she broke off so suddenly, I gripped her waist. ¡°Today?¡±

    ¡°He just...¡± She winced and shook her head. ¡°He said something that disturbed me.¡±

    ¡°What did he say?¡± I nearly yelled.

    She jumped and gaped at me. ¡°It wasn¡¯t that awful, don¡¯t worry. I¡¯m sorry, Knox. I didn¡¯t mean to worry you.¡±

    I growled out a sound and waved her apology aside. ¡°Just tell me what he said, and I¡¯ll judge for myself if I should worry.¡±

    ¡°Okay, fine. He told me I looked good today, like better than usual, that there was a certain glow about me. Then he asked me if I¡¯d finally lost my virginity.¡±

    ¡°He said what?¡± I grew rigid with outrage, ready to kick Jeremy the lawyer¡¯s son¡¯s ass.

    ¡°But it was more like, ¡®Finally got your cherry popped, huh?¡¯ And he leaned in really close with one of those oily, cocky grins. It just...¡± She shuddered in my arms. ¡°It skeeved me out.¡±

    ¡°And it should. That was a totally inappropriate question. Who the hell is this guy?¡±

    ¡°I told you. He¡¯s my father¡¯s lawyer¡¯s¡ª¡±

    ¡°Yeah, I got that part. Don¡¯t ever get stuck alone with that creep.¡±

    ¡°Oh, trust me. I make sure I don¡¯t. And today, I think he actually tried to get me alone. But I kept escaping him. I just have this feeling he¡¯d try something if he ever did corner me...and he wouldn¡¯t care if I was willing or not.¡±

    ¡°Then there¡¯s probably a good reason you feel that way.¡± I pulled her in close and kissed her hair.

    ¡°So you don¡¯t think I¡¯m being paranoid and overreacting.¡±

    ¡°Hell, no. Trust your instincts, always. Sometimes they know more than your brain does.¡±

    She sighed suddenly and went totally lax against me. ¡°This is why I love coming to you. You always make me feel better.¡±

    ¡°That¡¯s my job.¡± I pressed my mouth to her temple. ¡°Boyfriend Duty number one.¡±

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    Humming out a sound of pleasure, she lifted her hand to my heart and continued to lounge against me. The bark of our trouble tree was beginning to bite into my spine, but with her in my lap and our legs entwined as they stretched out in front of us, I wasn¡¯t moving a muscle.

    I don¡¯t know how long we sat that way without talking, just enjoying nature abounding around us. I kind of thought she might¡¯ve dozed off, and I loved that she was comfortable enough to fall asleep in my arms.

    Enjoying the serenity of the moment, I played with her hair, braiding a few tendrils together and then combing it free.

    When she drew in a deep breath and smoothed her hand over my chest, I realized she was still awake after all.

    ¡°You know,¡± she murmured, her voice drowsy as if she might drop off any moment. ¡°You still haven¡¯t told me what you want to be when you grow up.¡±

    I grinned at her persistence and brought her hair to my nose to smell it. ¡°Because I don¡¯t know.¡±

    Her fingers worked slowly down my chest toward my stomach. ¡°What about colleges? Do you just want to go to Ellamore, or did you have something else in mind?¡±

    I sighed and dropped the lock of hair. ¡°I¡¯m not going to college.¡±

    ¡°But¡ª¡±

    ¡°There¡¯s no way I could afford it.¡±

    Sitting up on my lap so she could face me, she shook her head. ¡°That¡¯s nonsense talk, Knox. There are all kinds of loans, scholarships¡ª¡±

    ¡°Scholarships?¡± I sniffed out an incredulous laugh. ¡°I¡¯m barely making it through high school without flunking. I was already held back one grade. There will be no scholarships for me. And I don¡¯t want to start out in debt...when I¡¯m pretty sure I won¡¯t even make it through to a full degree.¡± Especially since I planned on saving every extra penny I earned from here on out to help support her through school, if it came to that.

    Her brow crinkled with confusion. ¡°Wait, you were held back a grade?¡±

    I nodded and began to play with her hair again to distract myself from my growing shame. I didn¡¯t like admitting to her what a dumbass I was. I wanted her to see me as someone...worthy.

    ¡°Second grade,¡± I said, ¡°Because my reading scores sucked ass. Took them another year to realize I had dyslexia.¡±

    She tipped her head to the side, squinting as if trying to figure out a puzzle. ¡°So...was your sister held back too?¡±

    ¡°Mercy?¡± I frowned, wondering how she¡¯d come to that conclusion. ¡°No, she doesn¡¯t have dyslexia. Just me.¡± Not even any of my younger brothers had ended up with it.

    ¡°Oh...huh. I guess I always thought you two were twins...because you were in the same grade.¡±

    And that was all she said about it. No mention of my dyslexia. No questions about how I made it through. Just simple acceptance, as if it were no big deal.

    ¡°I¡¯m a year older than Mercy,¡± I explained. ¡°Which is another humiliation, being in the same grade as your younger sister. She likes to tease me about what an idiot I am.¡±

    City¡¯s eyes narrowed. ¡°Whatever. You¡¯re not an idiot at all. You¡¯re one of the smartest, most logical people I know.¡±

    ¡°Oh yeah?¡± I loved her defense of me and had to smile as I asked, ¡°What brought you to that conclusion?¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± She shook her head. ¡°Maybe from spending every day with you this summer. We do talk, you know. A lot. And I can¡¯t tell you how many small tidbits of information I¡¯ve learned from you. I¡¯ve also noticed what a snap memory you have.¡±

    ¡°Yeah, it¡¯s been my only saving grace, because my reading skills suck ass.¡±

    ¡°Well, all of you seems valuable to me.¡± She kissed my cheek. ¡°So maybe you¡¯ll never make the best grades in school because your eyes see things differently. You¡¯re still amazingly wonderful in so many other ways. You have street smarts and survival skills. You can still be anything you want to be.¡±

    ¡°I guess I¡¯ll have to think about what I want to be then,¡± I murmured, awed by her complete sense of faith in me.

    ¡°That¡¯s a good idea, since you¡¯re going to have to have some kind of plan after you graduate from high school next spring.¡±

    ¡°I do have a plan,¡± I said. ¡°To get out.¡±

    She sent me an odd look. ¡°And go where?¡±

    ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± I shrugged. ¡°Wherever. I¡¯ve always wanted to get away...go somewhere where I¡¯m worth something, where I¡¯m not a piece of shit Parker, where I can just be Knox and make my own way.¡±

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    Sympathy flooded her baby blues as she cupped my face in both hands. ¡°You¡¯re worth something to me.¡±

    I pressed my forehead to hers. ¡°And that¡¯s why I¡¯m waiting to see where you go first. Because wherever you are, that¡¯s where I¡¯ll be, too.¡±

    Her lips parted. ¡°Knox,¡± she whispered.

    ¡°I love you, City.¡± My voice broke with uncertainty as I realized this was the first time I was telling her the actual words. Aloud. ¡°You are my future.¡±

    ¡°Oh my God. Oh my God.¡± Her fingers shook against my cheeks and her eyes went all glassy and wet. Then her trembling lips curved into the most beautiful smile ever. ¡°Is it okay if I say it back?¡±

    I laughed because I was so relieved. ¡°I would actually really appreciate it if you did.¡±

    She gave one of her high-pitched fangirl screams. ¡°Then I love you too. Oh my God, Knox. We love each other.¡±

    ¡°Yeah, I caught that.¡± Then I kissed her, wet and opened mouth and so hungry that I grew a little too enthusiastic. Before I knew it, I was gripping her hip and grinding her down hard into my lap until she was riding my erection through our clothes, and my lips were devouring hers.

    ¡°Wait, wait, wait,¡± she gasped, pulling free of my mouth and pressing her head to mine.

    She might¡¯ve separated our lips, but she continued to press down on my straining cock.

    ¡°I¡¯m sorry,¡± I immediately apologized. ¡°I¡¯m stopping. I didn¡¯t mean to get so...¡±

    ¡°No, it¡¯s okay. I just needed a minute.¡±

    I nodded. ¡°Take all the time you want, baby. We have the rest of our lives. We don¡¯t have to rush anything.¡±

    Blowing out a breath, she nodded. ¡°Okay. Thank you.¡± Almost exactly one minute later, she heaved out another deep breath. Then she looked up at me and asked, ¡°How many girls have you been with?¡±

    Totally not expecting the question, I pulled back in surprise. Then I smirked. ¡°I sit next to them in my Home Economics class all the time.¡±

    She nudged my chest to scold me even as she grinned. ¡°Shut up, Forrest Gump, I¡¯m serious.¡±

    Still feeling the need to tease her, because she looked kind of jealous, and I liked it, I asked, ¡°How many do you think?¡±

    After biting her lip a thoughtful second, she said, ¡°Eight?¡±

    Wondering where she¡¯d come up with a number like that, I shook my head. ¡°Nope.¡±

    Cheeks paling, she croaked, ¡°More? Oh my God, can I even count all of them on my fingers and toes?¡±

    When I shook my head again, she began to edge away from me. She looked so crushed and horrified, I had to stop messing with her. I grabbed her hand and tugged her back. ¡°Because the number doesn¡¯t even reach high enough to be counted on a single finger.¡±

    My answer confused her¡ªI could tell because she frowned and stared at me as if I made no sense. Then her head swished back and forth. ¡°But...¡±

    ¡°Zero,¡± I said. ¡°The number is zero.¡±

    Her eyes flew open wide. ¡°Oh my God. You¡¯re a¡ª¡±

    My cheeks flushed hot as I slapped a hand over her mouth. This was so damn embarrassing.

    City peeled my fingers off her mouth. ¡°You cannot be a virgin. How is that even possible?¡±

    ¡°Hey, you¡¯re one too,¡± I hissed, reminding her she had no more experience than I did and no right to bash me, even though, okay...I was the guy. I was eighteen. I should¡¯ve scored by now.

    ¡°Yeah, but I¡¯m...¡±

    When she didn¡¯t elaborate, I lifted an eyebrow, waiting for her to explain why it was okay for her to be a virgin and not me.

    She cleared her throat and motioned at me. ¡°You¡¯re so...so gorgeous, and smart, and charming, and just...amazing. I would¡¯ve thought girls were constantly begging to be with you.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m also Bruce Parker¡¯s son.¡± I shrugged. ¡°It kind of makes me a pariah in these parts.¡±

    Her nose wrinkled as if she disagreed. ¡°That doesn¡¯t seem fair. A lot of girls are missing out on the awesome that is you.¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s no less fair than having to be the innocent preserved daughter of the great and mighty Abbott Bainbridge. I bet no one¡¯s ever touched you before because they¡¯re all scared shitless of your father.¡±

    I ran my fingertip down her soft porcelain cheek. She really was pure and untouched from the ugliness of life in a way I relished about her. Being in her blissfully happy presence always gave me hope in the world.

    ¡°You¡¯re touching me,¡± she rasped, clearly affected by the path of my fingers as I stroked the side of her throat.

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    ¡°That¡¯s because I¡¯m a trashy Parker who doesn¡¯t know any better.¡± The soft place I¡¯d been touching looked too delicious to resist, so I leaned in and kissed her there, right behind her ear.

    She closed her eyes, tipping her head to the side to let me kiss her more. ¡°Stop calling yourself trashy,¡± she reprimanded with no heat in her voice because she was too busy sighing. ¡°You¡¯re really good at that. I was so sure you¡¯d had more experience.¡±

    ¡°I didn¡¯t say I had no experience. I¡¯ve just never had sex before.¡±

    She pulled away, hurt and surprise brightening her eyes. ¡°So...how far have you ever gone?¡±

    I gulped, hoping I hadn¡¯t just screwed myself and pissed her off, or worse, hurt her. ¡°How far have you ever gone?¡± I countered.

    She snorted. ¡°Come on, Knox. You know how far I¡¯ve gone. The day I bumped into you in the woods was the closest I¡¯d ever been to a boy. I¡¯d never kissed one before you, never held one of their hands.¡± She let out a self-derisive answer. ¡°Heck, I¡¯ve never even danced with one.¡±

    My eyebrows shot up. ¡°You¡¯ve never danced with a boy before?¡±

    ¡°No,¡± she growled from between clenched teeth. ¡°I have not. So now it¡¯s your turn. How far have you gone before?¡±

    I cleared my throat, suddenly leery. She was jealous, and I could already see the pain in her eyes. I was hurting her. But I couldn¡¯t lie to her, so I glanced away and admitted, ¡°Freshman year, junior girl, it was a night after a big basketball game win. There was a party, all these people were celebrating. I think she was drunk, but she came up to me and told me I was cute, so...¡± I shrugged. ¡°We made out.¡±

    ¡°And?¡± City pressed. ¡°You made it to...first base? Second? Third?¡±

    My mind went blank, because I didn¡¯t even know how to answer. ¡°Well, I don¡¯t technically know what happens at each base, so...¡±

    ¡°First base is just kissing,¡± she started, more than willing to explain. ¡°French included. Second is anything above the waist, and third is anything below without going all the way, and a home run is...well, you know.¡±

    When I turned to blink at her, she blushed. ¡°I have two older brothers,¡± she rushed to defend herself. ¡°And they talk openly with their friends.¡±

    ¡°Okay.¡± I blew out a breath. ¡°It was definitely second base, then.¡±

    Her mouth fell open. ¡°You went up her shirt?¡±

    ¡°Uh...well...she took the shirt off, so there was really no, you know...going up it.¡±

    ¡°Did she take off her bra too?¡±

    Wow, did my shoes suddenly look interesting, and shit, they were scuffed all to hell. I really needed a new pair of sneakers.

    ¡°Knox?¡± Her low voice made me clench the back of my teeth. Damn it, why did I feel this unavoidable need to confess everything to her?

    ¡°Yeah,¡± I muttered, digging my toe through the hole at the end of my sneaker. Yep, I really needed to buy a new pair...someday. ¡°She took her bra off too.¡±

    When she went stiff in my arms, I immediately looked at her, panicking. ¡°City¡ª¡±

    She held up a hand and started breathing funny. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, but I just don¡¯t like it. I don¡¯t like knowing you¡¯ve touched some other girl¡¯s boobs. Her nipples...and you¡¯ve never even seen mine.¡±

    ¡°I...¡± When her words finally unscrambled themselves in my brain, I blinked, completely baffled. ¡°What?¡±

    Hugging herself, she moved away. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I¡¯m jealous. I know, it¡¯s stupid, but I can¡¯t help it. I just... I hate learning that you knew some other girl more than you know me.¡±

    With a sudden laugh, I shook my head and reached for her. ¡°Trust me, City. I know a hell of a lot more about you than I ever knew about her. Hell, I didn¡¯t even know her name until the next day at school when I heard one of her friends call to her...right after she walked right past me, completely ignoring me because she probably didn¡¯t even remember me.¡±

    City gnawed on her lip, scowling thoughtfully as she stared into space. Then she focused on me. ¡°I still don¡¯t like it. I can¡¯t handle you knowing the color of her nipples and not mine.¡±

    I grinned. ¡°So does this mean you¡¯re going to tell me the color of your nipples?¡± I liked where this conversation was headed.

    Her jaw hardened with a determined, almost angry bent. ¡°No. I¡¯m going to show you.¡±

    And she pulled off her shirt. Just like that. When she was left in nothing but a bra from the waist up, I gaped, my mouth falling open. ¡°Uh... Jesus, City. Are you sure about this?¡±

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    ¡°Yes. Do you want to take the bra off?¡±

    ¡°Hell, yes. But...I probably shouldn¡¯t. We¡ª¡±

    She set her warm, soft hands over mine, which for some reason made my tongue stall out.

    ¡°Please help me get over this jealousy. Give me more than you ever gave her.¡±

    From that point on, I was a goner. The girl I loved was asking me to do this for her, so I would. And I¡¯d love every fucking second of it.

    ¡°Okay,¡± I whispered. When I set a hand on her hip, she beamed at me.

    Her flesh was warm and so freaking soft. I didn¡¯t know skin could be this soft. And when I smoothed my palm up all that naked, soft skin it gave me goose bumps. She was just as smooth and warm all the way up. When I reached the back of her bra, I paused, but decided not to go there. I¡¯d heard too many horror stories about guys fumbling too long with a bra clasp, so I skipped it entirely and moved to the thin, silky strap on her left shoulder.

    I met her gaze and hooked my finger under it. Then I smiled as I slowly dragged it down her arm. The top part of her bra cup sagged, revealing the uppermost swell of her breast.

    Breathing in through my mouth, I studied them in dazed wonder before I lifted my gaze to make sure she was doing okay.

    Grinning at me, she caught my cheek in her palm and said, ¡°You look excited yet worried.¡±

    Bingo. ¡°I don¡¯t want to mess this up,¡± I admitted.

    Shaking her head, she assured me, ¡°That¡¯s not even possible.¡± Then she bit her lip. ¡°Unless you don¡¯t like what you see.¡±

    I snorted. ¡°Now that isn¡¯t possible.¡± I slid off the other strap, and the front of her bra slid down even more until I could almost see nipple.

    After one last glance at her face to make sure she was okay, I folded the front down entirely.

    ¡°Oh.¡± I sucked in a breath I hadn¡¯t even realized I¡¯d been holding. ¡°Wow.¡± I glanced up at her face. Her cheeks were blazing pink, but she kept smiling, so I went back to her nipples. They were rosy pink and already beaded so tight into hard buds I couldn¡¯t help but reach out and brush my thumbs over them.

    She gasped and grabbed my shoulders. ¡°Oh!¡± It was her turn to gasp. ¡°Wow.¡±

    We shared a smile, and then I cupped their weight in my hands before flicking my thumbs over the straining nipples again.

    ¡°God, Knox.¡± She ground her lap down on mine. ¡°You freaking tease.¡±

    I gave a husky laugh and then leaned down to close my mouth over one ripe peak.

    She grabbed my hair and pulled hard. ¡°Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.¡±

    Sucking her in deep, I spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying the hell out of second base.

    The hardest thing I ever did was sit outside the stairwell and listen to her cry.

    Bad shit had happened to me, things I relived in my darkest nightmares, but I¡¯d always been able to fight back, rage against those attacks, react. Forcing myself to not react as Felicity wept because I had hurt her slaughtered me. Something inside me withered and then crumbled into dust.

    Probably my humanity.

    This was best for her, though; that¡¯s what I kept telling myself. I could only hurt her if I reentered her life.

    So why the hell was she out there, bawling after I¡¯d attempted to do the right goddamn thing? She needed to stop. She needed to stop weeping, or I was going to lose it.

    I pressed my back against the wall, rested my elbows on my bent knees and cradled my head in my hands as I gritted my teeth and listened to the worst sound in the world.

    And then she did stop. I¡¯m not sure how long she¡¯d gone on¡ªit felt like fucking decades and I was half delirious by that point¡ªbut the hiccups gradually subsided, then she picked herself up off the floor, and she left.

    I remained, sitting just outside the stairwell, my hands shaking, my heart pounding and my vision graying at the edges.

    I had no idea she¡¯d tried to visit me in prison...and on her birthday, no less. I remembered her birthday clearly. I¡¯d been lying on my stomach in the medical ward, trying not to cry out from the pain as they stitched the tear in my rectum back together. Turning my head away from their tray full of supplies so I didn¡¯t have to look at all the needles and shit they were going to use on me, I¡¯d ended up facing a bare wall with nothing but a calendar hanging on it. When I¡¯d realized it was her eighteenth birthday, I¡¯d closed my eyes and sung happy birthday to her in my head to distract myself from what was happening.

    Recalling that day didn¡¯t calm me any, though. Rage, the same sick need to destroy that I¡¯d had the night before in Pick¡¯s office, rallied inside me. I had a bad feeling as soon as I stood up, I¡¯d take out the entire hall, rip every door off its hinge, dent in all the walls, heave the fire extinguisher out the window. So I sat there clenching and unclenching my hands and concentrating on breathing.

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    I was focusing so hard on keeping myself together, I didn¡¯t hear the footsteps on the stairs until Eva rounded the corner with a baby on her hip and her free arm loaded with bags.

    ¡°Oh! Knox. Sorry, I didn¡¯t see you there.¡± She had to dance around my feet to avoid tripping over them.

    As I pulled my legs in closer to my body and gaped up at her in horror, she grinned back, having no clue how close to detonating I was.

    ¡°Thank God you decided to come back. I got you some clothes this morning. I guessed on sizes, so fingers crossed that something actually fits.¡±

    I stood because it seemed wrong to sit in front of her while she was standing there, loaded down with so much weight.

    ¡°I can carry something.¡±

    I reached for the bags, but she handed me the kid. I froze, scared out of my mind, as soon as the little girl landed in my arms.

    Why the hell was she handing me her child while I was like this? I could lose my control at any second. But neither mother nor daughter seemed to care. As Eva strode ahead of me toward their apartment door, Skylar grinned at me, clutched a handful of my shirt and babbled out a greeting.

    My stomach clenched as I stared back. She could¡¯ve been Bentley if her hair had been red. She could¡¯ve been my sweet, innocent niece who¡¯d died a tragic death, but she was a real live girl, here in my arms and gazing at me with absolute trust.

    A cold sweat dripped down my back. I hurried after Eva and halted just inside the doorway, hesitating when Pick and Julian entered the living room from the kitchen, the scent of coffee following him. He paused when he saw me, and I remembered what he¡¯d said the night before. He trusted me with his children.

    Except all the responsibility his trust bore on me only made me panic more. What if I accidentally hurt one of his babies?

    ¡°What do you think?¡± Eva asked, pulling something from the first shopping bag. ¡°I went with dark colors because they seem to suit you.¡± She turned to me and held up a navy-colored shirt as she came forward to measure it against my shoulders and see how well it would do. ¡°I got a couple hoodies too. All sized extra-large. But we can take them back if they don¡¯t fit.¡±

    When she held one of those up next, I blinked in confusion. ¡°You really bought me clothes?¡± I wasn¡¯t even sure how to respond to that. ¡°You didn¡¯t have to do that.¡±

    She shrugged and turned away. ¡°We wanted to.¡±

    I glanced at Pick. He shrugged too.

    Well, shit. I owed these people more than they could ever know, and how had I repaid them? By wrecking Pick¡¯s office. By pushing him against a wall. By giving one of his favorite employees a black eye.

    Bile rose in my throat.

    ¡°It was nearly impossible to find long pants,¡± Eva went on, tugging a pair of blue jeans from her shopping bag. ¡°But I¡¯m not a shopping queen for nothing. I just hope these will be comfortable enough.¡±

    She tried to come at me with them next, but Pick intercepted her. ¡°Tink, maybe we could do this later. I need Knox to help me at the office with something for a while. Okay?¡±

    She squinted at him as if she knew he was lying. But she shrugged and smiled. ¡°All right. You guys have fun. See you later, love.¡±

    After smacking him on the lips with a kiss, she took both kids from us and herded them toward the kitchen. ¡°Let¡¯s see what Daddy was making for breakfast, shall we?¡±

    As soon as they were out of sight, Pick sent me a hard glance. ¡°Let¡¯s go.¡±

    I followed him out the door, without a word. I had no idea what he had planned, but if he brought up Felicity, I wouldn¡¯t be able to take it.

    My fists would fly.

    Once we were in his car and heading in the opposite direction from the club, I glanced over. ¡°So where are we really going?¡±

    I expected him to tell me he was dropping me off at the first curb he found that was sufficiently far away from his family. But he said, ¡°I came up with an idea for you, a place I think you could go when you¡¯re like this.¡±

    My jaw clenched. ¡°Like what?¡±

    Damn it, could he tell? Did he realize just how close to the surface my violence was getting, when the rest of his family had been utterly oblivious?

    ¡°Don¡¯t dick me around, Parker. I¡¯m betting a hell of a lot on a gut feeling I have about you, and risking even more if I¡¯m wrong. The least you can do is be honest with me. And you have the same look in your eyes as you did last night before you destroyed my office.¡±

    Humiliation sliced through me. Gripping my fingers around my knees, I watched how white my knuckles grew. ¡°I wouldn¡¯t have hurt your family,¡± I muttered, even though I wasn¡¯t too sure of my own claim. I wouldn¡¯t have wanted to hurt anyone, but I wasn¡¯t sure if I could control myself enough to stop it.

 Page 83

    ¡°Hell, I know that.¡± Pick sent me a dry look. ¡°I know that better than you do. But it¡¯s not healthy to bottle it in either. You need a venting system.¡±

    As he pulled into a parking lot, I focused on the building he¡¯d brought me to. It was a gym, boasting of boxing lessons in the window.

    ¡°I¡¯m getting you a membership here.¡±

    I glanced across the interior of the car. Had he lost his mind?

    ¡°And you don¡¯t think this will only evoke more violence in me?¡±

    ¡°Fuck, no.¡± Pick laughed and slugged me in the shoulder. ¡°Trust me, man. Seriously, what is with everyone not trusting me lately? I have fucking awesome instincts. I know what I¡¯m talking about.¡±

    When he pushed out of the car, I did too, willing to try anything. My eyes about bugged out of my head when I realized how much he had to pay to sign me up to come here on a regular basis, though.

    And when I tried to resist, he only held up a finger.

    ¡°Trust, my man.¡±

    I shut my mouth but shook my head, tallying in my head everything I already owed him and would continue to owe him.

    ¡°Don¡¯t even worry about it,¡± he finally said as if reading my mind. ¡°Just pay it forward someday.¡±

    I sniffed, not sure how I could ever give to someone what he¡¯d given to me.

    But I let it happen. I got a membership, and they set me up with a trainer, who wouldn¡¯t be able to start working with me until Tuesday afternoon. But I was allowed to visit the weight room immediately. So I did.

    Pick left me there, and I got started. My muscles were stiff because it¡¯d been a few days since I¡¯d worked out in the prison yard, but after some time on the leg curl, power rack, elliptical and butterfly press, I was feeling loose, and actually a lot calmer.

    So maybe Pick might¡¯ve been onto something. It made me want to hang out here all day. Except I hadn¡¯t eaten since the night before, so I eventually returned to the Ryan apartment.

    Eva fed me a late lunch, and the kids played around me on the floor until they fell asleep on me. Pick left in the early evening to get some work done at the club, and I headed out for a while, still uneasy about being left alone with Eva and the kids.

    As I wandered through the city streets, breathing in my freedom and unable to believe I was really out of Statesburg for good, I thought of my woods. I missed the smell, the peace, Felicity. An ache grew in my chest.

    When I passed a floral shop, I went inside to breathe in the closest scent of nature I could get. But it only made the pain throb more, so I left minutes later.

    I found myself at Forbidden. She worked tonight and would¡¯ve already started her shift by now. I watched the building, the front lights, and the line forming to get in as a doorman admitted the guests in small groups at a time.

    She was in there.

    I expelled a breath, almost settled to know she was so close. Even though I¡¯d promised myself I¡¯d leave her alone and not find out where she was, now that I knew, I relished the knowledge.

    Since it was Friday, it was Asher¡¯s night for his band to perform, and the place looked busy. It made me think they were a fairly popular group. He¡¯d definitely had a nice voice last night when he sang to himself as he wiped down tables and swept the floor. I might have actually gone inside to listen to him if I didn¡¯t know she was in there.

    I didn¡¯t realize how long I¡¯d leaned against a building down the block, just watching the club, until employees started to exit. Finally, it occurred to me what a stalker I was being. Shit. Had I really been lurking here for hours, just waiting to see her?

    When she exited, escorted by Mason, I tugged the hood of my sweater up and backed into a shadow. My greedy gaze gobbled her up as the two of them crossed the street. Mason politely remained by her car until she¡¯d unlocked her door and waved him good-bye.

    The beat-up junker she climbed into coughed to life, its one headlight spilling across the parking lot, and then it chugged clunkily onto the street.

    I shook my head. What the hell was she driving? I wouldn¡¯t even classify that piece of shit as a car.

    Watching it disappear down the block and listening to it backfire after she turned a corner stirred a helpless frustration in me, that uncontrollable need to destroy I felt every time I thought of how the one summer I¡¯d spent with her had ruined her entire life.

    If only she hadn¡¯t left her family, she¡¯d probably be driving something luxurious and expensive right now, something safe that had no chance of ever breaking down on her or leaving her stranded.

    That had been the plan. I¡¯d done what her father had said so she would be okay and taken care of, so she could be safe and never have to drive a piece of shit car to a waitressing job, so she could follow her dream and go to college. But she¡¯d ruined everything when she¡¯d left them.

 Page 84

    I looked up at the stars as my inner Hulk yearned to smash. It kept stirring inside me, so I hiked back to the gym and was pleasantly surprised to find it open all night. Took me a couple hours of working out to calm down.

    Dawn rose above the city as I returned to the apartment.

    Eva was already awake, and she sent me straight to bed as soon as she opened the door for me. I crashed on Julian¡¯s Spiderman sheets and slept hard, without a single nightmare, until it was time to get up for my shift at the club.

    Sporting a shirt that actually fit and jeans that were long enough to cover my ankles tonight, I approached the bar, feeling halfway human.

    I¡¯d checked the schedule, just to make sure she wouldn¡¯t be working and in the process, I discovered I¡¯d be paired with Asher and Ten. All the signs outside claimed it was karaoke night, and the first thing I noticed when I entered was Asher on the stage, playing with wires and dials to test the sound system.

    ¡°Yo, Parker,¡± Ten called from the bar. ¡°Get your ass over here so I can show you how to switch out these kegs.¡±

    He was rolling a tank out from under the counter as I joined him. As he grabbed its replacement, he explained the process, demanding I hand him shit, sticking up his palm and spitting out things like, ¡°Tube... Clamp... Shank.¡±

    I glowered at him for that last one, and after a second, he glanced up because I hadn¡¯t set anything in his hand.

    ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡±

    I narrowed my eyes, and he finally seemed to catch on. ¡°Not that kind of shank, inmate.¡± Reaching past me to the counter, he picked up a round chunk of metal. ¡°This...is a beer shank. It attaches to the beer faucet up here, like so.¡±

    As he screwed everything into place, I watched and learned. Afterward, he glanced at me, eyebrows lifted.

    I shrugged. ¡°So I have more experience with the other kind of shank.¡±

    ¡°And I just shit myself,¡± he uttered, gaping at me. ¡°You¡¯re not fucking kidding me right now, are you?¡±

    I only wished I were. ¡°Best defense on the inside that you¡¯ll ever have.¡±

    ¡°Right.¡± He cleared his throat and focused his attention on the equipment he was showing me how to put together. ¡°I¡¯ll keep that in mind.¡±

    There were only a few more steps he had to teach me, so he turned all business as he did so. I nodded, paying close attention as I soaked everything in.

    Afterward, Ten blew out a breath and straightened. When he turned to me and opened his mouth, I knew he was going to say something totally un-work related, and I had a feeling it wasn¡¯t something to put me in a good mood.

    ¡°So...yeah. My twin sister died...almost five years ago.¡±

    I blinked, not sure where that had come from. ¡°Excuse me?¡±

    Shifting his weight from one foot to the other in a nervous manner, he scrubbed at the back of his neck. ¡°Yeah,¡± he muttered. ¡°It really sucked.¡±

    When he said nothing else, I squinted at him, so he narrowed his eyes right back. ¡°I¡¯m just saying...I get it, okay. All that losing your family bullshit...¡± He twirled a finger at me. ¡°I understand.¡±

    Oh, hell, no. Was this guy honestly trying to comfort me through my grief? No. Just...no. But the sympathy in his gaze made something in my guts give a hard, vicious twist, and I knew. He really did understand.

    Shit, I didn¡¯t want to like this punk. But he was offering me compassion, in a very strange, exasperating way. I actually felt my coldness toward him begin to thaw.

    After a brief nod, I muttered, ¡°Okay.¡±

    He blinked, cocked his head to the side and crinkled his brow. Then amusement entered his features. ¡°Well, all right then,¡± he answered and slapped me hard on the side of the arm. ¡°Glad we had this chat. But don¡¯t expect a hug or anything from me, because I¡¯m not into that shit. ¡¯Kay?¡±

    ¡°I wasn¡¯t.¡±

    ¡°Well...good.¡±

    He began to turn away, until I asked, ¡°Would you really have fucking hugged me?¡±

    With a sniff, he sent me a scowl. ¡°No.¡± Then he shrugged. ¡°I don¡¯t know. Maybe...if you¡¯d been a total pussy about it and started crying or something.¡±

    I lifted an eyebrow. ¡°You really thought telling me it sucked and that you got it would make me cry?¡±

    ¡°Hey, fuck you, man. At least I tried to sympathize.¡±

    I knew he was going to storm off in a pissed-off rage, so I quietly said, ¡°Okay, fine. Thank you for trying.¡±

    Pausing, he sent me a leery squint.

    So I added, ¡°And you¡¯re right. It sucks.¡±

 Page 85

    His shoulders deflated a little and he nodded. Sorrow filled his face. ¡°I swear, the happy memories get to you the most. Make you feel like you¡¯re trying to breathe through grinding sawblades or some shit.¡±

    I drew in a sharp breath and nodded, feeling those blades now as Bentley¡¯s innocent little blue eyes and red hair wavered to the forefront of my mind. Then Mercy¡¯s smile as she danced around the kitchen with Hash, Speed and Cobra having a jousting match with empty toilet paper rolls they¡¯d taped together.

    Yeah, the happy memories did hurt the most.

    ¡°Yeah,¡± Ten murmured, echoing my thoughts. He nodded, patted me more softly on the arm, and moved out from behind the bar, calling out to all the waitresses and the waiting doorman that it was time to open.

    I turned to watch him, and almost jumped out of my skin when I found Felicity right there, on the other side of the counter, frowning as she darted her gaze between me and Ten.

    ¡°What¡¯re you doing here?¡± I demanded, giving an internal wince at how hard and accusing my voice sounded.

    Obviously not expecting the question, she yelped and dropped the box of napkins she¡¯d been stuffing.

    Wide blue eyes gaped at me. ¡°I...I¡¯m working,¡± she stuttered before frowning and gritting her teeth as if mad at herself for flinching away from me.

    I shook my head. ¡°You¡¯re not on the schedule.¡±

    Her eyebrows crinkled. ¡°Mandy has a sick kid, so I¡¯m filling in her for her.¡±

    ¡°Does Pick know?¡±

    Sputtering, she shook her head. ¡°I don¡¯t think so. Why? If we can find a replacement, we don¡¯t bother him with little changes here and there.¡±

    Shit, I was stuck working with her for a full night. And she looked really good in that black Forbidden shirt, blue jean skirt and half apron tied snug around her waist.

    I drew in a sharp breath as quietly as possible. But, damn. Why did she still have to be so fucking breathtaking?

    ¡°Oh,¡± was all I mumbled as I began to turn away.

    ¡°Don¡¯t worry,¡± she snipped at my back, her tone turning sharp. ¡°I won¡¯t try to make you talk tonight. I¡¯ve completely lost the desire to say anything to you, anyway.¡±

    I closed my eyes and tried not to break as the sound of her tears in the stairwell of Pick¡¯s apartment building echoed through my ears.

    It was best to be distant with her, I repeated to myself. It was best for her if I pushed her away.

    ¡°Though I did forget to tell you I¡¯m sorry about your family.¡± Losing the acidity in her voice, she turned slightly sympathetic, which was even harder to resist. ¡°I just learned yesterday that you didn¡¯t know until you were released.¡±

    I nodded, letting her know I¡¯d heard her and hoping she¡¯d move away. But I didn¡¯t hear her leave.

    I didn¡¯t like her knowing that no one had told me my family died. It was exactly the kind of thing that would stir up her bleeding heart. And the last thing she needed was to feel any kind of compassion toward me. If I was going to successfully keep her away, she needed to loathe me.

    Except I¡¯m pretty sure I didn¡¯t have the heart to be cruel enough to drive her off for good.

    Behind me, City spoke again. ¡°I still leave flowers at Bentley¡¯s grave, in case you ever want to know where she¡¯s buried.¡±

    Aww, Jesus. A sob escaped and I immediately bumped a fisted hand to my mouth. I think my knees maybe even buckled, but maybe not because I managed to keep standing. It only felt as if the world had been knocked out from under me. Dizziness assailed me as I glanced back at the woman I loved.

    Tears had filled her lashes, but she wasn¡¯t outright crying.

    I lowered my hand enough to rasp, ¡°Okay,¡± and she nodded, sending me a small smile before turning and moving away.

    The day of the cotillion seemed particularly hot and muggy. As I pulled on my mauve dress that mother had called puce, I groaned. This suffocating thing was going to stifle me in the heat even more. So I paused before slipping the straps over my shoulders to draw in one last fresh breath. Since the top part of my back would be exposed before the bottom part tied together corset style, I couldn¡¯t wear a bra.

    I took a moment to gaze at my bare breasts in the mirror, remembering Knox¡¯s mouth on them. They were a little sore today, in a good achy way. Whenever I thought about what we¡¯d done, the ache would spread, blossoming out my nipples and down between my legs. I wished he were here now, so I could press down against the hardness under his jeans and relieve some of this pulsing throb.

    I was horny, I realized with a start, and it made me laugh.

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    Throughout all my childhood, I¡¯d always felt like a misfit who could never fit in or do things like normal people. When I¡¯d gone to school, the feeling continued because I was so paranoid. But after the way my family had always treated me like an outsider, I¡¯d been too afraid to put myself out there.

    I¡¯d been so sure I¡¯d grow old alone and sad because I could never find a place to fit in. But yesterday, a boy had told me he loved me, and he¡¯d kissed my breasts, and I felt so far above a normal, average girl today; I freaking glowed. And I knew where I fit in now.

    Suddenly understanding why Jeremy had wondered if I¡¯d lost my virginity, I flushed even harder. Would people really be able to tell I was in love just from looking at me? What if someone in my family noticed and decided to investigate? What if, someday, they followed me out to meet Knox and found us together?

    ¡°Felicity!¡± Mother¡¯s irritated voice called from the base of the steps. ¡°Really. What is taking so long? The hair stylist and makeup artist are here and waiting.¡±

    With a sigh, I fastened the rest of my dress, slid on the heels Mother had chosen to go with it, and hurried from the room. ¡°I¡¯m coming.¡±

    As I clattered down the steps, Mother glared at me from the bottom. ¡°Tread more carefully, will you? You sound like a herd of buffalo tromping down the stairwell. I¡¯d at least like to give the hair stylist the illusion you¡¯re a proper young lady.¡±

    ¡°Sorry,¡± I mumbled, ducking my face and slowing my step so the tap of heels could be more ladylike.

    Sniffing in disgust, Mother grabbed my arm and hauled me after her. I think the ladies waiting in the parlor to fix me up had heard my scolding. They each sent me sympathetic grimaces and were extra nice as they worked simultaneously on my face and hair. The entire time, my mother stood guard, offering the occasional nasty critique, and by the time they were done, I had to admit, I looked good. I swear the makeup made me appear eighteen, maybe even older. And there wasn¡¯t an ounce of frizz to my hair; every curl looked amazing.

    ¡°The photographer¡¯s here,¡± Father announced as he strolled by, shuffling through a pile of mail in his hands.

    ¡°Good.¡± Mother urged me to stand with an almost proud smile, then she called sharply. ¡°Abbott. She¡¯s ready. What do you think?¡±

    ¡°Hmm?¡± He paused to frown at her.

    Mother hitched her chin my way. ¡°Felicity,¡± she said.

    ¡°Oh, yes.¡± He glanced over, barely looking at me. ¡°Very nice.¡±

    ¡°I know.¡± Mother preened. ¡°I had to go out of state to find just the perfect stylist to produce this kind of miracle to her untamable hair.¡±

    I shrank my shoulders a little, embarrassed that for a moment there, I thought she¡¯d been happy with me and the way I looked. But no, she was pleased with the transformation she had orchestrated.

    No longer worried about glowing from my newfound love in front of her or anyone else in my family, I followed her outside, miserable and hot, and ready to get the day over with.

    Garrett met us as he was going in. He paused and took me in, studying me from head to toe. After a snort, he passed by, saying, ¡°Might¡¯ve looked better if you¡¯d stuffed your bra.¡±

    I gazed after him as he entered the house, definitely no longer glowing and suddenly self-conscious. What if Knox had had the same thought? What if he¡¯d been disappointed? He hadn¡¯t seemed as if he minded my breast size last night, but what if¡ª

    ¡°Felicity!¡± Mother snapped. ¡°My God, what is wrong with you? Quit dawdling and come along.¡±

    I nodded and hurried after her toward a man who was waiting with a black bag slung over his shoulder and one of those enormous professional cameras in hand.

    He¡¯d already scoped out the yard and had a few places in mind to click off some shots. I swear, I was this close to getting stung by a bee at the rose arbor, but I didn¡¯t say a word.

    After getting a majority of my poses in the gazebo, Mother decided she wanted a family portrait taken here too, since the photographer was on hand.

    Twenty minutes of moaning and grumbling later, the men in the family joined us. Max might have been the only person to tell me I looked nice, but he was too self-absorbed at the moment, lost in his own thoughts, to notice anyone else, and I was grateful.

    I wasn¡¯t sure what to think of him anymore. I might¡¯ve even trusted Garrett more than I did Max. Garrett had always been open and forthright over any loathing he felt. Max was too guarded, and now I knew he wasn¡¯t quite as kind as I¡¯d always thought he was.

    Lost in my own thoughts about how I wanted to avoid Max from here on out, I nearly jumped out of my skin when a loud crack, like a tree limb falling and crashing to the ground, came from the trees just inside the woods.

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    ¡°What the devil was that?¡± my father groused as Mother gasped and clutched his arm.

    ¡°I think someone¡¯s out there,¡± Max reported, lifting his hand to his eyes to shade some sunlight as he gazed into the woods.

    I zipped my attention that way, only knowing of one person who frequented this forest. When I saw a shadow slipping through the trees, I gasped and set my hand against my chest.

    ¡°That better not be my fucking diaper vandal,¡± Garrett roared. He took off sprinting into the trees, and Max started after him.

    Worried about Knox, I started off too, but Mother caught my arm and tripped me up. ¡°Felicity! Do not go out there.¡±

    I opened my mouth but had no idea how to answer.

    Seconds later, I heard a shout, and then Garrett¡¯s triumphant, ¡°Got him!¡±

    ¡°Oh, God,¡± I whispered, praying it really was some random peeping Tom, and not Knox.

    But luck wasn¡¯t with me as both Max and Garrett dragged a resisting, scowling Knox into our yard.

    As Mother continued to hold me back at her side, my father stepped forward, frowning. ¡°What¡¯re you doing on Bainbridge property, boy? Just who do you think you are?¡±

    ¡°He¡¯s one of the Parkers,¡± Max reported, and Garrett growled. ¡°Are you the asshat vandalizing my room with dirty fucking diapers?¡±

    Knox glanced at him briefly. ¡°Why would I vandalize your room when I know you weren¡¯t the one to get my sister pregnant?¡± Then he sliced a glare Max¡¯s way that was so hard and accusing I gulped in fear, worried he might try something to really get himself into trouble.

    ¡°Stop looking at me like that,¡± Max ordered just as Father glanced at my mother and said, ¡°Call the sheriff.¡±

    Mother nodded and turned toward the house to get a phone. I pulled free of her grip and remained where I was on the steps of the gazebo. Knox hadn¡¯t looked at me yet, and I willed him to just as much as I willed him not to. I ached for some kind of message from him, reassuring me he was going to be okay, just as much as I feared he might give us away if he glanced anywhere toward me.

    My father strolled up to him and caught his chin. As he moved Knox¡¯s face up into the light, I saw a couple of scratches on his cheek. Covering my mouth with my hands, I hoped he was okay. If he¡¯d been up in the tree watching us when the limb had fallen, he could¡¯ve been hurt badly.

    ¡°What¡¯re you doing here, boy?¡±

    Knox jerked his chin from my father¡¯s hand and glared at him with defiance. ¡°I just wanted to see all the girls in their pretty dresses.¡±

    I blinked at his answer, because it wasn¡¯t something Knox¡ªthe Knox I knew¡ªwould ever say. I swear, he dumbed himself down just to irritate my father more.

    It worked. Father¡¯s scowl deepened. ¡°What makes you think there would be any girls in dresses here?¡±

    Knox began to glance my way, and I held my breath, but at the last second, he turned back to my father, a look of confusion crinkling his brow. ¡°Isn¡¯t this where that big, fancy cotillion¡¯s supposed to be tonight?¡±

    My father huffed, ¡°No, it is not. Why in God¡¯s name did you assume that?¡±

    ¡°Well...¡± Knox appeared to be genuinely confused. ¡°This is the nicest house in the entire county. Where else would it be?¡±

    The compliment threw my father. He sputtered for a minute before booming, ¡°Well, you¡¯re wrong. The cotillion is to take place at the antebellum center in town, I believe.¡±

    ¡°Oh.¡± Knox seemed chagrined as he blushed and said, ¡°Sorry.¡±

    Not sure how to deal with his apology, Father scowled harder. ¡°Well...¡±

    A police cruiser pulled into the drive and around to the side of the house where we were.

    ¡°I¡¯ll just let the sheriff deal with you,¡± my father announced.

    The sheriff lectured Knox for a few minutes about trespassing and peeping Tom laws, but since my father had lost his indignant rage, the sheriff was disinclined to arrest Knox for anything, and he let him go with a warning.

    I knew my relief was a little too obvious, but I was also pretty sure no one was paying any attention to me, so I just kept blowing out the breath of pent-up worry I¡¯d been holding inside me.

    When my brothers finally let Knox go, he immediately turned for the forest to leave, but the sheriff shouted at him, telling him not to enter the woods again. He escorted Knox home by making him sit in the back of his police car.

    As I stared at Knox through the back window of the car, a shiver of dread worked through me. A bad feeling struck, like a foreboding premonition. I knew this wasn¡¯t the last time I¡¯d see him this way.

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    He must¡¯ve felt the same awful omen, or maybe he just felt me watching him, because he lifted his face and finally looked at me. He looked so sad, I wanted to chase after the retreating police car, crying and screaming over the injustice of it. But I stood rigid, shaking on the inside and wishing I didn¡¯t have to hide how much I loved him.

    I was maudlin for the rest of the night. I woodenly followed orders, walking where I was supposed to walk and standing where I was supposed to stand, but not even my mother¡¯s threats could get me to smile.

    When the long, dreadful night was finally over, I slumped into my room and immediately slipped off the heels, which were killing me. The urge to pick them up and throw them as hard as I could against the wall rose, but I swallowed it down.

    I felt so awful for what had happened to Knox, and even worse that I hadn¡¯t reacted at all when he¡¯d been treated that way. Shame filled me. I should¡¯ve stepped in and defended him, or...something.

    Slumping onto my bed, I stared down at my hands in my lap, wishing I could see him now.

    When a sharp, small object snapped against my window, I yelped and jumped up from the bed, gaping at the glass.

    Another pebble pelted it.

    Catching my breath, I raced forward, knowing it was him. But I couldn¡¯t see him through the dark until I opened the window all the way, stuck my head out, and he waved to me. Elation roared through me, quickly chased by fear.

    ¡°Are you crazy?¡± I hissed, glancing briefly behind me to make sure my bedroom door was still closed. ¡°What¡¯re you doing here? If anyone saw you¡ª¡±

    His white teeth gleamed through the dark as he merely grinned at me. ¡°Meet me in the gazebo.¡±

    ¡°Knox.¡± I shook my head, still unable to believe he was here. ¡°Don¡¯t be insane. We¡¯ll get caught.¡±

    ¡°And wear that dress.¡± Then he was gone, streaking across the yard in the direction of the gazebo.

    I groaned out a breath, knowing it¡¯d be safer for him if I stayed away. But the temptation got to me, and a full five seconds later, I was slapping the window closed and scurrying barefoot from my room. I tiptoed to the stairs and crept down. I could hear voices in the front parlor, so I held my breath as I snuck to the back hall and slipped out the kitchen exit.

    Once I was free in the warm evening air, I exhaled and then grinned.

    Knox was close, and I was going to get to see him.

    The grass was damp against the soles of my feet, and it felt good. I almost laughed aloud, I was so happy. But that would¡¯ve been bad, so I kept quiet until I reached the gazebo steps. Then I yelped out a scream as someone grasped my arms from behind.

    Sure one of my brothers or father had followed me, I tensed, trying to think up a reason I had come out here. Maybe I¡¯d left a hair barrette from earlier when we were taking pictures. Yeah. That sounded good.

    But then the voice of my captor murmured, ¡°Shh. It¡¯s just me,¡± as he tugged me back against a familiar chest.

    Relieved, I whirled around and hugged him tight. His mouth captured mine with a kiss that stole my breath and reignited the tingling between my legs that I¡¯d felt earlier in the day, except it was sharper and more intense this time around.

    ¡°Why aren¡¯t you at work?¡± I demanded when we broke apart.

    ¡°We ran out of bags; they let me off early.¡± He picked me up and carried me up, out of the moonlight and into the shadows of the gazebo. ¡°Crazy girl,¡± he murmured into my ear before he kissed my pulse directly under it. ¡°You¡¯re not wearing any shoes.¡±

    ¡°How could I think of shoes,¡± I answered breathlessly, ¡°when I knew you were so close?¡±

    He groaned and kissed me again, hard and desperate. ¡°God, I missed you today. It felt all kinds of wrong not being able to look at you when you were right fucking there across this very yard.¡±

    When his fingers immediately went to the spaghetti straps of my dress, my breathing picked up. I ran my hands through his hair, scraping my nails over his scalp. ¡°I can¡¯t believe you came to watch me get my pictures taken. That was too risky, Knox. You were caught. You almost went to jail.¡±

    He only grinned. ¡°But I didn¡¯t. And I had to see you in your fancy cotillion outfit.¡± Then he slowly lowered the front of my dress, baring my breasts to him. ¡°Jesus.¡± he sucked in a breath. ¡°I knew you weren¡¯t wearing a bra, but this is... You¡¯re lovely. You¡¯re so lovely, City. Fully clothed or with your top down like this, you¡¯re the most beautiful thing I¡¯ve ever seen. Did any of your idiot family tell you how nice you looked today?¡±

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    I shook my head and whispered, ¡°No.¡±

    ¡°I didn¡¯t think so. I hated watching the way they treated you¡±

    ¡°Me?¡± I sputtered. ¡°What about the way they treated you? I felt so ashamed of myself for not saying anything, not stepping in or telling them to leave you alone.¡±

    ¡°I¡¯m glad you didn¡¯t. You know I didn¡¯t want you to say or do anything, right?¡±

    I stared up at him, knowing, but still feeling crappy. As if sensing my continued guilt, he sent me a soft smile and returned his attention to my breasts.

    ¡°Besides, it turned out fine, didn¡¯t it? And we¡¯re here together now.¡±

    A sudden cool gust blew across us, chilling my exposed breasts. I shivered and felt my nipples pearl into tight buds. Knox sucked in a breath and cupped them in his hands, immediately warming them.

    ¡°I saw you looking at them,¡± he said. ¡°Earlier, when I was out here waiting for you to come out and get your picture taken, the curtains to your room were open. I could see in as you changed, and you paused to look at them in the mirror.¡±

    ¡°Oh my God.¡± I moaned in absolute horror and tried to cover them with my hands, but he caught my wrists. ¡°You saw that?¡±

    He nodded, and his eyes twinkled in the moonlight. ¡°It was so fucking hot, City. I got so hard so fast I ached. I wished I were there with you, touching you while you looked at yourself.¡±

    His naughty admission made something deep in my stomach clench. I pressed my legs together and trembled out a long breath. ¡°I was thinking about you kissing them, and I wished you¡¯d do it again.¡±

    ¡°Fuck...me.¡± He groaned and dipped his face to take the right breast into his mouth before sucking it in deep.

    Whimpering, I clutched his head and gloried in his fevered assault.

    ¡°I know it¡¯s probably asshole-ish of me to go straight for your boobs,¡± he admitted when he came up for air, making me frown because I didn¡¯t think he¡¯d gone for them quickly enough, actually. ¡°But just a quick hi, okay? I don¡¯t want them to feel left out. Hello, ladies. Have you missed me? Yes, I missed you too.¡± He nuzzled his face between them and pressed a quick kiss to the side of each one before taking the left nipple into his mouth and sucking languidly.

    Digging my fingers into his shoulder, I swam in the sensations he drew from me. But something Garrett had said earlier caused a niggle of doubt. ¡°You don¡¯t think they¡¯re too small?¡±

    Knox pulled away from them to straighten and send me an incredulous gape. ¡°What?¡±

    I covered myself with my hands. ¡°My breasts. I know they¡¯re not the biggest.¡±

    ¡°So?¡± Catching my hands and gently drawing them open, Knox shook his head. ¡°You think size is the most important thing?¡±

    I flushed and ducked my head self-consciously. ¡°Well, yeah.¡±

    With a chuckle, he studied my chest. ¡°Not even by a long shot. Or maybe I¡¯m just a nipple man, because I love the way yours respond to me. All I have to do is look at them, and they get hard and tight and pert, like they¡¯re happy to see me. It makes me hard and tight right back, very happy to see them. And size...hell, all I need is a mouthful.¡±

    He bent his head down and sucked me in, proving it. It was some kind of breaking point for me. ¡°I want you so much,¡± I sobbed, clutching him.

    ¡°I know,¡± he muffled around his mouthful. ¡°I want you too.¡±

    ¡°No.¡± Grasping his hair, I pulled him off my breast and made him look at me, dead in the eye. ¡°I mean, I really want you. I want to be with you, Knox. Tonight.¡±

    I stared after City as she finished filling her napkin holder and moved to another table. Feeling as if the wind had been knocked out of me, I wondered why the hell I¡¯d agreed to go anywhere with her, especially Bentley¡¯s grave, where we¡¯d probably bond.

    She needed to stay away from me.

    And I needed to keep her away from me.

    Except, it just wasn¡¯t my damn night. As the club opened, she didn¡¯t avoid me whenever she came up to the bar to fill her orders. Sometimes she took her business to one of the other two bartenders, but if I was right there, she rattled off whatever she needed as if I were any other coworker. But I could see it in her eyes. She was rocking some serious pity.

    What made matters worse was that I knew she wouldn¡¯t push me away if I went to her. If I sought comfort, she¡¯d comfort me.

    Yet, I refused to touch her, even made sure our hands didn¡¯t brush during money exchanges.

    The only distraction that kept me from going insane with how there she was¡ªright fucking in front of me, touching distance away¡ªwas the small issue Asher had. About as soon as the doors opened, women began to pour in.

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    Even Ten noticed, pausing by me and muttering, ¡°Is it just me, or are there a ton of chicks here tonight? It¡¯s not Thursday.¡±

    No, it wasn¡¯t Thursday, and yes, there were definitely a ton of women. They gathered around the bar area too, not waiting for a waitress to come to them, but bringing their orders straight to us.

    ¡°And they all seem to be Incubus fans,¡± I noticed.

    ¡°What?¡± Ten whipped his head toward the crowd, where about twenty different women were just milling around, sipping from their assorted drinks, and...were they all staring at Asher?

    Ten broke out belly laughing. ¡°Oh, my fucking God. You¡¯ve got to be kidding me. Holy shit, this is too good to be true.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± I asked, slightly startled I was even curious enough to care what he was talking about.

    He set a hand on my shoulder and leaned confidentially closer. ¡°Last night, Hart sang some song about this chick he saw singing karaoke a couple months back. Girl had a boyfriend, but she left him with a raging hard-on, and he¡¯s been obsessed with finding her again ever since. Anyway, in the song, he had some lyric about her wearing an Incubus T-shirt and singing¡ª¡±

    On cue, a new karaoke song began, playing a popular hit. I glanced toward the stage, to find three ladies preparing to sing. And they were all sporting different versions of Incubus on their shirts.

    ¡°Let me guess. It was All About that Bass?¡±

    Ten groaned. ¡°Aww, hell no. Please don¡¯t tell me all these fucking women are going to sing that one song all fucking night long? Stab me now.¡±

    I glanced toward Asher, who was frowning in confusion at the stage, just as one tone-deaf woman started to butcher the opening line.

    ¡°No, no, NO!¡± Ten wailed, covering his ears. ¡°I¡¯m going to slaughter Hart for this.¡±

    I tipped my head toward Asher. ¡°I don¡¯t think he gets it yet.¡±

    ¡°Hart!¡± Ten bellowed, storming Asher¡¯s way. ¡°You son of a bitch. Look what you¡¯ve done.¡±

    Asher whirled to him, utter confusion on his face. I couldn¡¯t hear the conversation that followed, but it consisted of Ten raging and waving his arms in wild anger, and Asher¡¯s expression of bewilderment morphing into horror.

    He whipped his head toward all the women at the bar, and as if sensing they finally had his attention, they began to wave and call, ¡°Asher! Over here! Look! Are you sure it wasn¡¯t me in this T-shirt?¡±

    Jerking backward until he bumped into the back counter, he merely gaped at them before he began to shake his head, denying what was going on.

    For the rest of the night, he refused to leave the safety behind the bar. Women were still occasionally able to reach across and grab at him, sometimes even catching bits of his clothes and tugging him closer. But overall, he managed to nervously laugh with them and gently pry their hands away.

    ¡°Better get used to it now, Hart,¡± Ten advised at one point. ¡°If you¡¯re going to be some big fucking rock star someday, this is going to be the norm for you.¡±

    I was a little afraid Asher was going to vomit at that point.

    Felicity was able to divert some of the women away from the bar by intercepting them and taking their orders, but a majority slipped past her to pester him. After a while, the three of us came up with a system where Ten and I dealt with customers and Asher stayed toward the back, mixing drinks.

    We were halfway through the shift when another diversion arrived to help me keep some of my attention off Felicity. A tall, bulky guy approached the bar. Ten immediately went to him and talked to him for a while, but he mainly kept his curious gaze on me. Then Ten reached across the counter to slug him companionably on the shoulder before he glanced at me and waved me over.

    I approached warily because I had no idea what this was about. But as soon as I was close enough, the stranger stuck out his hand. ¡°I¡¯m Quinn Hamilton.¡±

    I blinked, not expecting that, before I slowly shook with him. He nodded humbly, respect glinting in his gaze.

    ¡°I just wanted to thank you for everything you did for Zoey. You saved both her and the baby. And they¡¯re my entire life.¡± Emotion flooded his features. ¡°I don¡¯t know what I¡¯d do without them.¡±

    Uncomfortable because he was making me feel a strange kinship with him, I couldn¡¯t look him in the eye as I nodded.

    ¡°If you ever need anything,¡± he went on, ¡°I would be honored to help.¡±

    I nodded again, but it felt really insignificant, so I added a rusty, ¡°Yeah, okay.¡± Then something I really did want to know hit me. ¡°How¡¯re they doing?¡±

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    An immediate grin spread across his face. ¡°They¡¯re pulling through, both getting healthier every day. Zoey was released from the hospital the other day, and J.B. still has to stay in a bit longer. But they¡¯re both healing.¡± He pulled a cell phone from his pocket and scrolled through it before showing me a picture of a red little baby with a wealth of dark hair, strapped to a bunch of tubes and wires.

    I studied the shot a moment before looking up at the father, who had nothing but pride oozing from him. ¡°He has your hair,¡± I said, remembering Zoey had been a blonde.

    ¡°Yeah, but he has Zoey¡¯s eyes.¡± He turned the screen back to himself. His expression of absolute awe caught me hard in the chest. Once upon a time I¡¯d dreamed of one day looking down at a baby and seeing both mine and his mother¡¯s features mixed together in one perfect little human we had created.

    Glancing around for Felicity, I nearly jumped out of my skin when I found her right there, approaching Quinn from the back.

    ¡°Hey, daddy,¡± she said, catching hold of his shoulder. ¡°Are you showing off baby pictures without letting me see any?¡±

    Quinn readily let her scroll through all he had. Her smile grew as he updated her with both Zoey and the baby¡¯s situations, then he thanked her for stopping by the hospital and giving them gifts. I tried not to stare as they chatted, but it was hard not to ache and wonder about the woman she¡¯d become.

    She seemed so familiar and friendly with everyone who worked here. The girl I¡¯d once known had been more of a loner, feeling awkward around everyone but me. It made me relieved as much as it depressed me. I was grateful she¡¯d found friends and a place to belong, but at the same time, it stung to realize she didn¡¯t need me any longer. She¡¯d bloomed into the perfect woman all on her own.

    ¡°Quinn!¡± Asher bounded forward, finally catching sight of him. ¡°Man, I will pay you five hundred dollars to take on the rest of this shift for me.¡±

    Quinn winced and shook his head. ¡°Sorry, I can¡¯t. I¡¯m going back to the hospital to sit with Zoey and the baby. I only dropped in after a change of clothes to thank Knox.¡±

    When he motioned to me, Felicity turned her gaze my way.

    ¡°I¡¯ll sit with them,¡± Asher offered. ¡°I¡¯ll even sing lullabies and all that shit. Please, man.¡±

    Even though he was regretful, Quinn wouldn¡¯t budge, wanting to be with his family. I didn¡¯t blame him. If I were him, it¡¯s where I would¡¯ve been too.

    He thanked me again, this time for taking up the slack for all the shifts he was missing out on, and then he was gone.

    Felicity lingered at the counter, still watching me. ¡°I heard about your heroics with Zoey. That was pretty nice of you.¡±

    I shrugged and grabbed a nearby rag to wipe away some beer that had spilled on the counter. I wanted to look at her more than I wanted my next breath, and yet I was too afraid to do so.

    ¡°I didn¡¯t have anything else going on at the time,¡± I finally mumbled and turned away. But I felt her still watching me.

    I hated this. I didn¡¯t know what to do about her in my life again. I craved every little second I got to see her, but I knew I should stay away. It was torment, the two cravings rivaling and constantly churning in me, playing tug-of-war between what my heart wanted and what I knew was best.

    By the time our shift ended, I was exhausted from stealing glances at her when I knew I shouldn¡¯t and then trying to be distant whenever she was at the bar. I couldn¡¯t wait to escape so I could fucking breathe right again.

    Asher plopped onto a stool, set his elbows on the countertop and buried his face in his hands. ¡°I am never singing that damn song again.¡±

    Ten snorted. ¡°I don¡¯t know what you¡¯re so bent out of shape about. Hordes of women just tried to get their hands on your junk. Your rock star ass should be eating that shit up.¡±

    ¡°I didn¡¯t want hordes of women,¡± Asher muttered through his hands. ¡°I just wanted to find the one.¡±

    ¡°You mean the one with the boyfriend?¡±

    ¡°Fuck you, man. She might not be with him anymore.¡±

    ¡°Yeah, well... I already have the only woman who counts, so you should just suck it up and sleep with the rest of them. Maybe toss a couple Parker¡¯s way while you¡¯re at it, help a guy out. He probably hasn¡¯t gotten laid since they let him out of the pen.¡± Glancing at me thoughtfully, Ten asked, ¡°When was the last time you dipped your wick, bud?¡±

    I narrowed my eyes at him, pissed because Felicity was so close, able to hear him clearly.

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    Nodding, he turned back to Asher. ¡°Yep, he needs pussy. Bad.¡±

    Felicity whirled from the table she¡¯d been wiping down. I held my breath, wondering if she¡¯d say anything about the last time I¡¯d been with anyone, since she knew every detail about it. But she didn¡¯t even glance my way, which felt like a punch to the solar plexus.

    ¡°Buck up, Asher.¡± She set a hand on his shoulder and gazed at him with all the sympathy in the world.

    I hated every second her fingers lingered.

    ¡°There¡¯s still hope you¡¯ll find her. It¡¯s only been one night since you sang that song.¡±

    When he mumbled a non-response, she dropped her hand from him, and I could finally breathe again. Then she went and bumped her shoulder against his with an encouraging grin. ¡°Hey. What did the mute say to the midget?¡±

    After asking the question, her gaze sought mine.

    I glowered, my jaw hard and hands fisting at my sides. But...what the hell?

    How dare she? How fucking dare she?

    ¡°Huh?¡± Asher glanced up with a confused frown.

    I couldn¡¯t stand here and watch this. Shoving my way from behind the bar, I stormed down the hall to the break room. Once inside with the door shut, I grabbed the coffee table and shoved it over, flipping it upside down and making all the magazines on top fly. I relished the chaos along with the crack and shatter of breaking wood when it landed. Except the hurricane of emotions started again as everything settled onto the floor. So I kicked the couch. Then I whirled to punch the wall.

    When the door came open, I spun around, ready to unload on whoever dared to interrupt me. But seeing her made me jerk to a halt, instantly contrite and ashamed as she took in the mess I¡¯d made.

    ¡°Well. I guess now I know how to get a reaction out of you.¡± Her words were steady and conversational as she stepped into the room and closed the door behind her.

    ¡°What¡¯re you doing back here?¡± I hated the break in my voice. Every time I spoke, it reminded me of how I¡¯d gotten it, and the helpless rage inside me only grew.

    ¡°I came to see why you left when I told Asher a joke.¡±

    I snorted and had to look away before I said something I¡¯d regret.

    ¡°Huh, Knox? Did you think that was something exclusive between us, that after you were gone, I¡¯d just stop doing it when I was nervous or distressed or wanted to cheer someone up?¡±

    Agony claimed my chest, clamping around it until I could barely breathe. But damn it, maybe I had thought she¡¯d reserved her jokes for me alone. It had been our thing. How the hell could she do it with another man, right fucking in front of me?

    ¡°Did you have to tell him that joke?¡± I growled, unable to stop myself.

    She released a calm breath. ¡°Yes.¡± When I slashed a scowl her way, she lifted her chin defiantly. ¡°I had to know how you¡¯d react. If you even remembered.¡±

    Something inside me eased. The anger and jealousy died instantly. Knowing she¡¯d done it because of me thrilled me as much as it killed me...killed me because she really needed to stop caring about my reactions.

    ¡°Of course I remember,¡± I snarled, upset and hurting and hating all of this. ¡°I spent six years behind bars because of that summer. I didn¡¯t forget a damn thing.¡±

    She hugged herself, looking suddenly small. The pain in her eyes made me glance away.

    ¡°I thought you said you didn¡¯t blame me,¡± she whispered.

    I closed my eyes. ¡°I don¡¯t.¡±

    ¡°Then why are you acting this way? Refusing to even talk to me, ignoring me, being so cold?¡±

    God, this was bad. It hurt so much to hear the pain in her voice. I really fucking hated doing this.

    ¡°Because I have to,¡± I bit back, opening my eyes to glare.

    When she glared back, looking as pissed and frustrated as I felt, I went on. ¡°Everything that happened between us happened a long fucking time ago. It¡¯s all in the past and should stay in the past. Things changed since then. I changed. I¡¯m not that eighteen-year-old kid you once knew. I¡¯m a complete stranger to you. So I don¡¯t see the point in reliving old times and accomplishing nothing but stirring up a bunch of heartache. You moved on.¡±

    She opened her mouth to argue, but I held up a hand.

    ¡°And that¡¯s what you were supposed to do, but you need to keep moving...away from me.¡±

    Defeat crossed her face and her shoulders dragged. But she shook her head. ¡°Why?¡±

    ¡°Because I¡¯m no fucking good for you. Why do you think? I¡¯m an ex-con. I went to jail for rape.¡±

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    ¡°But you didn¡¯t¡ª¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s what¡¯s on my record. I¡¯m considered a sexual predator, whether I like it not, whether I forced you or not. And let¡¯s not forget the murder part. I killed two people.¡± When she winced, I went on, pushing harder. ¡°With my bare hands. There¡¯s no technicality about that. I killed them. And it changed me. No matter what either of us want, I¡¯m never going to be that innocent boy you fell in love with.¡± Shaking my head, I thumped my hands against my chest. ¡°There¡¯s nothing here for you any longer, City.¡±

    She sniffed and wiped at her face as her eyes filled with tears. ¡°See, I listen to everything you say, but all I heard was you calling me City. I didn¡¯t think I¡¯d ever hear you call me that again. And yet, here you stand, and I...I just can¡¯t believe you¡¯re really here. It¡¯s really you, yet you keep pushing me away.¡±

    ¡°Christ,¡± I muttered, wiping my face. I glanced away, unable to watch the tears glistening from her cheeks. I wouldn¡¯t be able to watch much more of this. She was shredding my willpower. ¡°Don¡¯t do this.¡±

    Her shoulders shuddered and her throat shifted as she swallowed. ¡°But I don¡¯t know if I can stop.¡± Her voice was soft, raspy. Tormented.

    I had to shut this shit down¡ªnow¡ªbefore she broke me. ¡°Then you¡¯d better get a fucking clue,¡± I snapped. ¡°My entire family is dead or gone to who knows where. I had to get my high school diploma in prison. I¡¯m starting over with nothing but a goddamn criminal record under my belt. I don¡¯t have a need or desire to reminisce about the old times. Getting tangled up with you once ruined me; I¡¯m not going there again. I just want to put it all behind me and get on with living the rest of my life. Okay?¡±

    She stared at me, her eyes swimming in tears. I had to be the biggest bastard ever. The urge to yank her into my arms suffocated me. I couldn¡¯t breathe past the yearning to hold her and apologize.

    Why did I still have to feel that all-consuming need to protect and soothe her?

    I drew in a tight breath. When I exhaled, I knew I was going to reach for her and apologize. But she nodded.

    ¡°I know you said you¡¯ve changed, and you¡¯re not the same Knox. I can see that for myself. Quite clearly. But there still has to be something in your heart. I know what¡¯s deep inside you. I don¡¯t think a person¡¯s core¡ªtheir true nature¡ªcan change this much.¡±

    Damn it, we¡¯d gotten way too close all those years ago. Even though I knew I¡¯d never be able to lie to her, I still tried. ¡°Well, I disagree.¡±

    ¡°My heart hasn¡¯t changed.¡± Her voice broke, and more tears collected in her eyelashes. ¡°I grew up and tried to move on, but right here...¡± She pummeled her chest with her fist. ¡°This is still the same, and since the moment you ran into me in the woods...it has beaten for you.¡±

    Fuuuuuck. I fisted my hands and stared up at the ceiling, vibrating with the need to reach for her.

    I needed to tune her out, resist, but she kept talking, and I just kept soaking it in.

    ¡°I can¡¯t live like this anymore, Knox. These last six years have been hell. Because being without you is like an open wound that bleeds and festers every day. It hurts and it¡¯s miserable, and now you¡¯re right here, yet you keep pushing me away.¡± She set her hands on my chest and pushed me. ¡°You can¡¯t hate me that much if you can react the way you did when I told Asher that joke?¡±

    I blew out a breath, wanting out of this conversation almost as much as I wanted to crawl out of my own skin and just be...someone else. ¡°I didn¡¯t say I ever hated you.¡±

    ¡°So you love me?¡± Her voice was soft as she stepped closer.

    Dropping my gaze to her, I could do nothing but stare into her penetrating eyes. Panic filled my chest. But I kept facing her directly, afraid to show just how much this slip of a woman intimidated me.

    She moved even closer. ¡°All you have to do is say you don¡¯t love me anymore, and I¡¯ll turn around right now, and walk out. I¡¯ll never bother you again.¡±

    This was my chance. My golden opportunity to save her from me. And I couldn¡¯t take it.

    Gritting my teeth, I clutched my head in my hands and felt my face go red as I bit out, ¡°God...damn you.¡±

    Her lips fluttered up with accomplishment. ¡°I love you, too,¡± she said simply. ¡°After all this, I still love you.¡±

    Something powerful and painful jarred through my system. I drew in a sharp breath.

    City kept watching me, her eyes steady and challenging. ¡°I¡¯ve never loved anyone the way I love you. I¡¯ve tried. Believe me, I tried so hard to get over you. I tried to move on...with different guys. But all I ever thought about was you.¡±

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    ¡°Don¡¯t,¡± I warned, my voice soft.

    She merely sniffed, crying silently. ¡°Don¡¯t what? Tell you the truth? Tell you I don¡¯t even remember how many there¡¯ve been, how none of them could ever make me forget you.¡±

    ¡°Stop it.¡± I backed her against the wall, using my size to intimidate her, scare her into silence. Because hearing about her with other guys chipped away at my soul.

    But she only looked up at me through all her tears. ¡°I let them into my body, and then I let them do whatever they wanted to me, and none of it mattered because all I ever wanted was¡ª¡±

    ¡°Damn it!¡± I roared and slapped the wall by her head, making her flinch. ¡°I said stop.¡±

    I don¡¯t think she could stop, though. She¡¯d already abandoned her pride. She was baring her soul, and her tears seemed to drag each word from deep within her. ¡°No one ever kissed me like you did. No one ever touched me like you did. No one¡ª¡±

    With a choked sound of defeat, I crushed my mouth to hers. I had to shut her up. Her words were slaying me. Her tears were like poison. I died a hundred deaths from each aching confession. And I needed her to stop before I ceased to exist.

    It wasn¡¯t until she clutched my face and ran her fingers up to my head, pulling hard at my scalp, that I realized I¡¯d just kissed her.

    Then it all hit me at once. Her smell, the taste of her lips, the warm soft texture of her cheeks under my palms. I groaned and pressed deeper into her softness, letting it consume me.

    ¡°City,¡± I gasped, arching her face back further so I could devour her. This was the end of a six-year famine, and I was starving.

    She whimpered, grasping back at me just as frantically. Her fingers couldn¡¯t seem to stay still, racing over my body, over my scalp, back down my shoulders, clutching my ass and pulling me tight in between her thighs.

    ¡°Yes,¡± she moaned, soaking me in.

    God, I¡¯d missed the humping, missed how she loved to grind against me as her mouth moved under mine.

    Her blue jean skirt bunched up to her waist as she lifted her legs to wrap them around my waist. My fingers couldn¡¯t resist the invitation and curled around her exposed thighs before slipping up and finding her panties. When my thumb brushed over the damp spot, we both groaned. Breaking the kiss to press my forehead to hers, I shoved the cloth aside and found her clit, messaging it without mercy.

    ¡°Knox,¡± she keened out, clutching my shoulder and riding my hand.

    ¡°It¡¯s been too long,¡± I bit out, so intent on her pleasure I couldn¡¯t focus on anything else. ¡°...since I¡¯ve seen you come.¡±

    She panted and writhed, telling me how close she was. ¡°Knox,¡± she gasped again, her voice high. It was starting; her fingernails dug through the cloth of my shirt into me, her eyes began to roll, and her mouth opened just as someone yelped, ¡°Oh, shit. Sorry.¡±

    I whirled around, ripping my finger out of her and pressing my back into her to protect her from view, but Ten had already averted his face and was reversing from the break room.

    ¡°My bad,¡± he apologized, only to pause and hold up a finger. ¡°But for the record, I totally did not see you two happening. I mean, what the fuck? When did¡ª¡±

    ¡°Get out,¡± I growled, and he was gone.

    As soon at the door shut, I shot away from Felicity, moving to the opposite side of the room. Shaking like crazy and on the edge of my own control, I wiped a hand over my face, only to smell her on my fingers. Big mistake. I almost came in my damn pants.

    I risked a glance her way to find her smoothing down her skirt and trying to regain her settled breaths.

    ¡°You okay?¡± I asked.

    She smiled at me, one of her warm, lovely City smiles. ¡°Sure.¡± Then she shrugged and blushed, chagrined. ¡°I mean, other than being totally embarrassed that Ten saw us and rocking all this sexual frustration, yeah, I¡¯m great.¡± She moved toward me as if she was going to hug me.

    I held up a hand, jerking my head back and forth. ¡°That shouldn¡¯t have happened.¡±

    Slowing to a stop, she frowned, her smile dying. ¡°What?¡±

    I looked away because I hated her disappointment. ¡°I told you, Felicity, we can¡¯t ever be together again. And I fucking meant it.¡±

    I hurried from the room before she could respond, even though she looked too hurt to do so. Then I blew past both Ten and Asher, along with the other waitresses who¡¯d worked tonight, and I escaped.

    Once outside, I found the same shadowed place where I¡¯d hidden the night Felicity had first tried to find me, and I pressed my back to the wall, aching with regret.

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    But she¡¯d get over it, I told myself. Breaking her heart and pushing her away so she could go on to live a happy life with all her Forbidden friends was better than letting her get caught up with me, when I¡¯d no doubt self-destruct one day and take her down with me.

    She was safer this way.

    ¡°I want you tonight,¡± I repeated. ¡°I want to go all the way with you.¡±

    Knox stared at me, dazed, for a full five seconds before he muttered, ¡°Jesus, City. You know I want you too. It¡¯s all I can think about. But I wasn¡¯t expecting this tonight. I...I¡¯m not ready.¡±

    I blinked, not at all expecting him to say that. I tried to pull away, feeling slutty and gross. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. I didn¡¯t mean to push. If you¡¯re not ready, I¡ª¡±

    He caught my arms, keeping me close, and laughed.

    ¡°No, baby. You misunderstood. I¡¯m not ready as in...I didn¡¯t bring anything.¡± When I only blinked at him, confused, he lifted an eyebrow and added, ¡°A condom.¡±

    ¡°Oh.¡± I flushed hard, feeling stupid and immature for not even thinking about that. ¡°Sorry, I didn¡¯t even think.¡±

    ¡°It¡¯s okay,¡± he reassured me, pulling me in close for a hug before kissing my hair. ¡°I have an idea, though, of something we could do instead of going all the way.¡± He met my eyes to send me a look that made me feel warm...all over. ¡°But it involves third base. You interested?¡±

    My sex clenched hard, and I brightened immediately, exhaling my joy and relief. ¡°Yes. I¡¯m definitely interested.¡±

    He slid his finger over my breast and then down, down toward my navel. ¡°And you have to get all the way naked.¡±

    I made a sound in the back of my throat, not sure if it was from nerves or excitement. But I bobbed my head, accepting those terms. ¡°Not here, though.¡± Not this close to my family. ¡°If you get caught here again, you¡¯ll definitely go to jail.¡± I shook my head. ¡°I don¡¯t want to be worried about that the entire time.¡±

    He nodded, understanding and respecting my wishes. ¡°The dock, then?¡±

    Perfect. ¡°Yes, please.¡±

    He grinned back, looking as excited as I felt. ¡°Okay, then. Climb on.¡± When he turned his back to me and crouched down, I frowned. He huffed out a breath. ¡°I¡¯m not letting you traipse through the woods at night barefoot, and I don¡¯t think I can wait for you to go all the way back inside to get some sensible shoes, so I¡¯m carrying you.¡±

    Shaking my head over his gallantry, I climbed onto his back, trying not to strangle him as I wrapped my arms around his shoulders.

    ¡°So...¡± He reached back and caught my thighs before hefting me higher. Then he started walking. ¡°How was the cotillion?¡±

    I waited until we were away from the gazebo and finally in the woods before answering. ¡°Fine.¡±

    ¡°Mmm.¡± He made a noncommittal sound in his throat before asking, ¡°Anything good to eat there?¡±

    ¡°Seafood,¡± I answered, glumly.

    He knew I wasn¡¯t a fan, so he made a sympathetic sound. ¡°What about dancing? Was there a dance too?¡±

    ¡°Yeah.¡± I sighed, wondering why he was so curious about my dull, boring evening. ¡°There¡¯s always one at the cotillion.¡±

    ¡°Did you dance with anyone?¡±

    I blinked before a grin spread across my face. ¡°Are you jealous?¡±

    He growled, but pressed. ¡°Did you dance with anyone or not?¡±

    Still beaming, I leaned around his shoulder to kiss his cheek. ¡°No. Of course not. No one ever asks me to dance.¡±

    ¡°Good.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± I scowled, but he sat me down at the dock¡¯s ramp because we¡¯d reached the strip pit.

    Then he turned to me and took my hand. After lifting my fingers to his mouth and kissing the knuckles, he asked, ¡°Will you dance with me? Right now?¡±

    My lips parted. But then I nodded eagerly. ¡°Okay.¡±

    He walked me onto the dock and turned to face me, sliding his arms around my waist. ¡°We don¡¯t have any music, so this might get awkward, but...¡± Stepping into a strange kind of waltz, he began to dance.

    I followed his lead, gazing up into his eyes and reveling in every feature of his face the moonlight offered.

    With a warm smile, he leaned in to brush his nose along my temple. ¡°When you said cotillion, I pictured you wearing one of those southern, 1800 dresses with a big hoop skirt that belled out, but this is really modern.¡±

    I sighed as his fingers moved over my spaghetti straps. ¡°Yeah, my mother said that in this situation, it¡¯s more important to keep up with the style of the times than to follow tradition.¡±

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    He nodded. ¡°It¡¯s a really pretty dress, but...I¡¯m a little more interested in what¡¯s under it, so...it¡¯s going to have to go.¡± Lowering the straps, he eased the front down, once again revealing my breasts, then he pushed it lower to my hips, letting me know he really did want it off.

    I reached down and helped him, pulling it the rest of the way off until it could tumble down my legs and pool at my feet, leaving me in nothing but a pair of white panties.

    ¡°God, you¡¯re beautiful.¡± Lightly moving his hands over my breasts, he continued to dance with me until his hands moved lower, then lower still.

    When he reached the waistband of my panties, I held my breath.

    His fingers gripped and slid the cloth down.

    ¡°Does this happen inside every girl when she dances with a boy, or is it just me?¡±

    He glanced up. ¡°I don¡¯t know; what¡¯s happening inside you?¡±

    I smiled. ¡°I¡¯m really, really wanting to explore third base right now.¡±

    My panties dropped the rest of the way to the ground, and his palm moved over my backside. ¡°Good,¡± he said into my ear. ¡°Now lie down, and we¡¯ll get started.¡±

    Nerves assailed me; I hesitated. But Knox took my hand and knelt on the dock with me. Then he spread out my dress so I could lie on it. At the last second, he ripped off his shirt to provide my head with extra pillowing. Then he motioned for me to get into place.

    I was shaky and nervous, and he could tell as he stared down at me. Taking my balled hands, he kissed them until I relaxed and opened them. ¡°We don¡¯t have to do it if you don¡¯t want to, but I really want to make you feel good, City.¡±

    ¡°Don¡¯t stop. I want that too,¡± I assured him. It was just...well, I was freaking naked in front of a boy. And he was about to explore...down there. Everything inside me was going haywire.¡±

    ¡°Okay,¡± he whispered, pressing his mouth to my palm. ¡°But you tell me at any time if you want to stop, and I will.¡±

    I bobbed my head. ¡°All right.¡±

    He finally looked at me, completely from head to toe, laid out nude on the dock while he knelt beside me.

    ¡°Fuck, City, you look good naked in the moonlight. You¡¯re...perfect.¡±

    ¡°I love you,¡± I said in a high, scared voice.

    His grin was immediate and warm. ¡°I love you, too.¡± Then he leaned down and kissed me, sweetly and closed-mouthed, on the lips.

    This, I could do. So I kissed him back and cupped his face, running my fingers up into his hair. He eased down beside me so we were stretched out next to each other on our sides, and as he deepened the kiss, his hand smoothed over my cheek and down my neck until he reached my breasts. After flicking his thumb over the nipple, he cupped me hard, making a jolt of pain mix with even more pleasure.

    I panted into his mouth and kissed him deeper. He groaned and moved his hand south, over my stomach and across to my hip. He cupped that a second before caressing his way to the apex of my thighs. Right before he reached the place that was sensitive, pulsing, and swollen, he paused. Then he pressed his forehead to mine, looked into my eyes, and touched me.

    I sucked in a breath at the shock of it.

    ¡°Is it okay?¡± he asked, his gaze worried.

    I gulped, not quite sure I could talk yet. Then I nodded, and blubbered, ¡°Better...so much better than okay.¡±

    Male satisfaction clouded his features, and he moved lower, until¡ª

    ¡°Oh, fuck me. You¡¯re wet. You¡¯re so fucking wet.¡±

    His finger plunged into me and I bucked against it. ¡°Knox. God, that feels...¡± I clutched his shoulder hard and savored the feeling. ¡°So...good.¡±

    ¡°Does it?¡± He stroked me then, drawing his finger out and then pushing it back in. I loved it and thrust up my hips to meet his next plunge. ¡°God, you¡¯re gorgeous. You¡¯re so gorgeous.¡±

    I bit my lip, watching him as he watched me back.

    ¡°Jesus, City,¡± he rasped. ¡°You¡¯re killing me here. You¡¯re not supposed to look this hot getting off to my hand. I¡¯m barely holding myself together.¡±

    Too seeped in the pleasure to care, I arched my back and begged, ¡°More.¡±

    He gave it, kissing me hard, tangling our tongues together as he added another finger and cupping one of my breasts with a free hand. I crashed my hips against his palm in feminine demand, and he moved faster, thrust deeper.

    ¡°Oh my God.¡± I pulled away from his kiss to arch my neck back and bow up my aching breasts. ¡°Something¡¯s happening. I think I¡¯m gonna come.¡±

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    ¡°Shit! Wait.¡± He moved down my body as I gaped at him in absolute confusion, but then he said, ¡°There was one more thing I wanted to do before you...¡± He didn¡¯t bother to finish his explanation. He pressed his mouth between my legs and licked me.

    I screamed and bucked against him. He shoved his fingers deep, swirled his tongue over a knotted bundle of nerves, and I came so hard I went lightheaded and slightly oxygen deprived. But the bolts of energy radiating from me felt so freaking good, I rode the high, not even caring.

    By the time I came down, I felt limp and satiated, ready to pass out and sleep for a decade.

    Knox blew out a breath and collapsed beside me, lying on his side so he could watch me. I rolled onto my side so I could face him too. We grinned like idiots at each other until we started to laugh.

    Then I held up a hand. ¡°Okay, I just have to say...I freaking love third base.¡±

    He laughed and kissed my lips in the moonlight. ¡°Yeah, so do I.¡±

    I shook my head, studying his beautiful, perfect face as he pulled back. ¡°How¡¯d you ever know to do something like that?¡±

    He shrugged. ¡°My dad watches a lot of porn.¡±

    ¡°Oh.¡± I bit my lip, my thoughts swirling. Then I whispered, ¡°Knox?¡±

    His lashes fluttered as if he could pass out too. Then he murmured, ¡°Hmm?¡±

    ¡°Can I confess something to you?¡±

    Eyes opening, he nodded. ¡°Of course.¡±

    ¡°My brothers watch a lot of porn too.¡±

    When I reached between us and snapped open the top button of his jeans, he sucked in a breath. ¡°City?¡±

    I lowered the zipper slowly. ¡°Can I do to you what you just did to me?¡±

    ¡°Uh...¡± Words seemed to fail him as I slipped my hand into the opening and clutched him through his underwear.

    ¡°I think the answer you¡¯re looking for is yes.¡±

    He groaned as I stroked him. ¡°Yes. Oh...fuck. Yes, okay. But only if you want to.¡±

    ¡°Oh, I want to. I want to so very, very badly.¡±

    Wiping a hand over his face, he watched as I drew him free of his underwear, then he lifted his hips so I could push his clothes out of the way. When I returned to his cock, I was amazed at how soft it was over the hardness beneath the surface. The slit at the end of the mushroomed head seeped a syrupy drop, so I leaned down and licked it away.

    He reacted violently, clutching my hair and surging his hips up. But a second later, he slammed his butt back to the dock under him. ¡°Sorry, sorry. Did I hurt you?¡±

    ¡°No. In fact,¡± I took his hand and placed it back in my hair. ¡°I kind of liked that response.¡±

    Then I put my mouth around the entire head. The groan that followed and his grip in my hair told me just how much he liked it. So I moved down, taking in more. All I really knew was that I was supposed to suck and not bite. Wrapping my lips around my teeth, I used suction to pull him in deeper. He shuddered, every muscle in him seeming to spasm out of control

    ¡°Fucking hell,¡± he gritted out. ¡°I¡¯m not going to last long.¡±

    I pulled out some only to suck as much as I could handle back in. It didn¡¯t take long to learn from his reactions that he liked speed and pressure, and lots of suction.

    ¡°City. I¡¯m gonna... God, I¡¯m gonna come.¡±

    Excited I was doing it right, I picked up the pace, but he clutched my hair hard and pulled me off him. Gripping the base, he pumped furiously for two or three strokes before cream shot out over his stomach. I gaped at how much came out of him.

    ¡°Oh, God,¡± he said, thumping the back of his head on the dock as he tried to regulate his breathing. ¡°That was...so much better than masturbating.¡±

    I grinned because his shock and pleasure was adorable. ¡°Thanks for pulling me off at the end,¡± I said, glancing at the stream of semen pooled on his stomach. ¡°I didn¡¯t realize there would be quite that much.¡±

    He laughed and looked down at it too. ¡°Yeah, I didn¡¯t figure you should swallow the first time out.¡±

    ¡°Yeah,¡± I agreed, beginning to frown. ¡°How¡¯re we supposed to clean it off?¡± I glanced at my dress, then my underwear, knowing it would be noble to let him use either of those to wipe his stomach clean, but...eww. I just couldn¡¯t.

    I think my expression amused him. He laughed again. ¡°Well, there is a large body of water right there. What do you say to...skinny-dipping?¡±

    I grinned at the idea. ¡°Well, I am already naked.¡±

    He glanced at his jeans shoved down to his thighs. ¡°And I could get there soon.¡±

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    ¡°Let¡¯s do it.¡± Without waiting on him to strip the rest of the way, I popped to my feet and took off running so I could dive into the cool evening water.

    I was having a good delicious dream about Knox moving inside me, hitting a spot that had me right on the edge, when someone crawled into bed with me, jerking me awake.

    I gasped, embarrassed and...well, mostly just embarrassed out of my freaking mind. It skeeved me out to be having a sex dream while a ten-year-old was seeking me for comfort after a nightmare. But damn, after almost reaching an orgasm with Knox at the club, I was left so hot and bothered I couldn¡¯t even be that mad at him for abandoning me afterward.

    I mean, okay, yes, I was upset. Pissed, really. But at least now I knew he still cared for me, he still wanted me, he still missed me. His inability to deny his love for me told me everything I needed to know. He was holding himself back for some oddball reason I wasn¡¯t yet aware of, but as soon as I figured out what that aggravating reason was, I was going to crush it under my feet and make it a total non-issue so he¡¯d never feel the need to push me away again.

    But first, I had to deal with Colton Gamble. This was the third night in a row he¡¯d sought me after a nightmare. The first two times, I hadn¡¯t asked him anything after I¡¯d gotten it out of him that he¡¯d had a bad dream and just wanted company. I¡¯d let it go and allowed him to stay the rest of the night. When I¡¯d asked Aspen about it, she¡¯d said he used to do that to Caroline, his sister, when she¡¯d lived here.

    Tonight, however, I was ready for him...well, as soon as I cooled my jets and stopped thinking of Knox¡¯s cock inside me.

    ¡°Another bad dream?¡± I asked after a minute, acting as if I were just then waking up.

    He cuddled in closer to me, trembling. ¡°Yeah.¡±

    ¡°Poor boy.¡± I smoothed his sweat-damp hair off his forehead. ¡°I hate having nightmares. I used to dream that I showed up to school in nothing but my underwear and everyone laughed and pointed, and no matter where I looked, I couldn¡¯t find any clothes to wear.¡±

    Colton giggled; his muscles relaxed.

    ¡°What was your dream about?¡± When he didn¡¯t answer, I guessed. ¡°It was about zombies, wasn¡¯t it?¡±

    Zombie games were our thing. Whenever I came to visit¡ªbefore I actually lived with the Gambles¡ªwe usually played some version of a zombie game on one of his gaming systems. Or we were known to watch the show iZombie together. He was slightly obsessed with them. It wouldn¡¯t surprise me at all if the undead were haunting his dreams.

    ¡°No,¡± he mumbled, though. ¡°It was about my mom.¡±

    I wasn¡¯t expecting this answer. The only thing Aspen had ever told me about his mom was that she¡¯d been neglectful and hadn¡¯t taken care of any of her kids, so Noel had scooped up his three siblings and moved them in with him.

    ¡°What about her?¡± I asked, kissing his forehead as I continued to pet his hair.

    ¡°She came and took me away,¡± he said, burrowing close. ¡°Every time I dream, she always drags me back with her, and I never see Brandt or Aspen or Noel or Caroline again.¡±

    I swallowed, wincing, because it hurt to hear a child was actually afraid of being with his mother. What the hell had she done to him?

    Ignoring the growing rage, I said, ¡°You know you don¡¯t have to worry about that, right? Noel and Aspen have legal custody of you now. Your mom couldn¡¯t take you, even if she wanted too.¡±

    ¡°I know,¡± he mumbled. ¡°But I can¡¯t stop dreaming about it.¡±

    ¡°Well, let¡¯s figure this out. If your mom ever did come for you and try to steal you back, what would you do?¡±

    He went tense. I rubbed his hair some more.

    ¡°How about this idea? I¡¯ve seen you take a hoe after a zombie, and boy, you¡¯re wicked awesome with a hoe, let me tell you. How about you threaten her with a hoe and tell her you¡¯re not going anywhere with her, or she gets the zombie death chop?¡±

    He giggled. ¡°Or a lawn-mower haircut.¡±

    ¡°Heck, yeah. You¡¯re deadly with those too.¡±

    We went through a few more scenarios of how he could stand up for himself and refuse to go anywhere with his mother. And after we talked it though, I nudged his arm. ¡°Hey, I have a surprise for you.¡±

    ¡°Really?¡± His voice perked to attention. ¡°What?¡±

    ¡°I can¡¯t tell you. You have to find it for yourself, but I hid it in this room and you can only find it in the dark, because I put a glow-in-the-dark sticker on it.¡±

    Colton immediately popped out of bed and started searching.

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    I smiled because he didn¡¯t seem to have a problem rooting through the dark at all.

    ¡°Found it,¡± he said, returning to the bed with the sound of crinkling paper as he tore the wrapping off. After a second, he asked, ¡°What is it?¡±

    ¡°What¡¯s it feel like?¡±

    ¡°I have no idea. Something soft and fuzzy with a little metal tube.¡±

    ¡°The soft fuzzy part is a rabbit foot.¡±

    ¡°A what? Eww.¡±

    ¡°Hey, I got this eww, gross rabbit foot from a hoodoo priestess,¡± I said, pitching my voice low. ¡°And I got it just for you, because they¡¯re full of good luck and protect you from harm. But...not just any rabbit foot from any ol¡¯ rabbit will do. Only the left hind foot brings good luck, and not just any left hind foot. The rabbit has to be caught in a cemetery on a full moon and the foot chopped off while the rabbit is still...alive. So don¡¯t you dare take my gift lightly. Somewhere in a cemetery, there¡¯s a three-footed rabbit limping around, just so you could be protected. And I haven¡¯t even gotten to the coolest part yet.¡±

    ¡°What?¡± he asked, sounding totally interested.

    ¡°The tube connected to it is actually monster repellant.¡±

    ¡°Nuh-uh. There¡¯s no such thing.¡±

    ¡°Oh, yes, there is. Whenever you think a monster might be near, you spray this baby in your mouth¡ªit¡¯s actually very minty flavored¡ªand it keeps any and every monster away from you. Go ahead.¡± I nudged him. ¡°Try it. Spray a squirt into your mouth.¡±

    After a second, I heard the aerosol spray go off. ¡°Ugh,¡± he muttered. ¡°That¡¯s disgusting.¡± Then he smacked his lips together a few times and added, ¡°But not too bad.¡±

    ¡°And?¡± I asked, ¡°Do you see any monsters?¡±

    ¡°Well...no. But you¡¯re here. They wouldn¡¯t come out with an adult in the room.¡±

    ¡°I guess there¡¯s only one way to really test these things then. Let¡¯s go to your room.¡±

    He followed readily and let me tuck him into his bed. ¡°You keep the lucky rabbit foot and monster repellant both under your pillow, okay? And we¡¯ll see if anything else bugs you for the rest of the night. If you sense even the presence of one, you just yank both gadgets out and put them to work. See if they help, okay?¡±

    ¡°Okay. I¡¯ll try them.¡±

    He let me leave, and when I checked on him five minutes later as I promised him I would, he was fast asleep. I could see his hand in the moonlight coming in through the window, though, and my gifts were tightly clasped in his grip.

    Feeling as if my job were done, I went back to my room alone. Except I tossed and turned because I kept thinking about Knox, wishing it were that easy to take away whatever nightmares were haunting him.

    When I woke, I felt gritty and worn and even more depressed. I¡¯d pushed Knox so hard already. Maybe I should just let him be and give up. Except the idea of him being finally free of prison and not with me gave me a small panic attack. I wasn¡¯t sure if I could give up, because he was the only thing I¡¯d ever really wanted. I wouldn¡¯t know what to do with myself if I stopped dreaming of being with him.

    ¡°Morning,¡± Aspen chirped as I trudged into the kitchen.

    I mumbled something I hoped she took as, ¡°Good morning,¡± and shuffled directly to the coffeemaker. Once I poured myself a cup, I slumped into a chair across from her and Noel.

    They stared at me a little too brightly...and expectantly. I finally muttered, ¡°What?¡± when neither of them said anything.

    Aspen snickered. ¡°So... he was too dark and brooding for you, huh?¡±

    ¡°Oh, hell,¡± I muttered, slapping my hand to my forehead. ¡°Ten has a big mouth, you know that?¡±

    ¡°Oh, we know.¡± Noel grinned and sipped at his own steaming brew. ¡°I¡¯m just glad it was you and not us he was gossiping about this time.¡± Covering his wife¡¯s hand, he sent her a small smile.

    It was such a sweet, loving gesture, and the look in their eyes was full of so much adoration and commitment, I burst into tears.

    ¡°Oh my God. Felicity?¡± Aspen was out of her chair and flying around to sit by me and take my hand so fast I laughed through my tears, and then went back to sobbing. ¡°Honey, what is it?¡±

    ¡°Did Parker hurt you?¡± Noel demanded.

    ¡°No,¡± I wailed. ¡°He would never. I just...¡± Oh hell, this was so mortifying, and I still couldn¡¯t help but make a total fool of myself as I wailed, ¡°I just...I love him so much.¡±

    ¡°What the hell?¡± Noel sputtered. ¡°The other night, you didn¡¯t even know him.¡±

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    ¡°I just didn¡¯t recognize him,¡± I argued. ¡°He looked so different, and acted so different. The last time I saw him, he was eighteen, and I swear he¡¯s grown, like, four inches, and about a million new muscles. His hair was longer then, and he just...he wasn¡¯t like he is now. Not at all.¡±

    ¡°So you knew him before he was arrested?¡± Aspen asked.

    I sighed. ¡°I was the reason he was arrested.¡±

    ¡°Wait.¡± Noel held up a hand, shaking his head. ¡°He told us he¡¯d served time for rape and murder.¡±

    ¡°Yeah.¡± I sniffed and wiped at my wet cheeks. ¡°I was sixteen. He was eighteen. Our families hated each other. When my brothers caught us together, that was it. End of story.¡±

    Aspen shook her head, slowly. ¡°How is that even remotely the end of the story? And how did he get six years for statutory rape when you two were so close in age? I¡¯ve heard of guys barely getting a slap on the hand for it, but never six years.¡±

    ¡°And where did the murder part come in?¡± Noel asked. ¡°Who¡¯d he kill?¡±

    Falling back in my seat, I hugged myself. ¡°Look, I don¡¯t know most of those answers. They hauled me off, and I barely got to see him one last time before the sheriff arrived and took him away. But I assume my father threatened him or his family somehow to get him to confess to a forcible rape, because that¡¯s what the idiot did, which gave him four years. And then, a few weeks before he was due to be released, he killed two men on the inside. I assume it was self-defense, because he¡¯s not a murderer. I don¡¯t know how he only ended up with two years for that. I just know he¡¯s out now, and I have no idea how it happened, because he was supposed to have over twenty years left.¡±

    ¡°Wow,¡± Aspen murmured. ¡°And you¡¯re just now telling me all this?¡±

    ¡°I didn¡¯t know how to tell you.¡±

    After blinking a few more times and then blowing out a breath, she nodded. ¡°It¡¯s okay. I haven¡¯t exactly told you everything about myself either.¡± A blush of guilt crossed her face before she blurted, ¡°I was Noel¡¯s teacher.¡±

    My mouth fell open. ¡°Huh?¡±

    ¡°In college. I was his English professor. He was my student.¡±

    ¡°But...¡± I shook my head. ¡°How is that possible? Are you even older than him?¡±

    While Noel barked out a laugh, Aspen blushed. ¡°The point is, I understand your silence. We both needed more time before unloading our bigger secrets on each other.¡±

    Boy, was she right.

    ¡°I still can¡¯t believe you and Parker...¡± Noel blew out a breath and shook his head. ¡°Wow. You¡¯re just...not a couple I¡¯d ever imagine paired up.¡±

    I swallowed, a little crushed to hear that. ¡°He¡¯s a completely different person now than he was then.¡±

    ¡°So he didn¡¯t rage out and destroy property back when you knew him?¡±

    I winced. ¡°So you heard what he did to the break room, huh?¡±

    Noel lifted his eyebrows. ¡°No. I was referring to what he did to Pick¡¯s office Thursday night.¡±

    After he told me how Knox had given Ten a black eye and destroyed Pick¡¯s desk and computer, I covered my mouth with my hand.

    Maybe this was why he kept pushing me away.

    ¡°You know,¡± I said. ¡°After some soldiers come home from war, they¡¯re all messed up from being so constantly in fight-mode, thinking of nothing but survival and focusing on the enemy. Maybe...maybe prison was just a different kind of battle.¡± Glancing at Aspen, I cringed. ¡°He didn¡¯t have that scar before he went in. And he killed two people while he was there. It couldn¡¯t have been pleasant for him.¡±

    She sent me a sympathetic look and patted my hand. ¡°Sounds like you could be on to something.¡±

    ¡°Which means you need to stay away from him,¡± Noel said, his voice stern. ¡°If whatever happened to him left him this unstable, then he¡¯s a danger to himself and everyone around him.¡±

    I frowned and opened my mouth to defend him, but then I remembered Ten¡¯s bruise, the wildness in Knox¡¯s eyes when he¡¯d been terrorizing the break room. And I remembered the last words he¡¯d said to me last night, that he couldn¡¯t ever be with me, not that he didn¡¯t want to be with me. That he couldn¡¯t.

    Maybe he felt the same way that Noel was suggesting, that he feared he was so unhinged he might be a danger to me.

    I slumped into my chair, not sure how to overcome an obstacle like that. I remembered what Knox was like when he went into his protective mode, and he was fierce about it. If he thought he was guarding me from himself, there may never be a way to break through his stubborn resistance to convince him he didn¡¯t need to.