ã€ŠRoyal Lotusã€‹


 1 Prologue

    I don''t hate my mother; even if she is a vile and cunning individual. Indeed, in her eyes I was nothing more than a mere tool to get her closer to my father, but she at least paid attention to me. Perhaps in the back of my head I was aware of the fact that it was a twisted relationship between the two of us; with her pushing me to excel in everything in order to appease my father and gain his attention, and I, the foolish child, believing it was out of pure love.

    I remember scorning my half-siblings and their mother as my father showered them with affection. I remember trying to poison my own younger sister after she presented me with beautiful roses. I remember trying to assault my older sister out of anger as she laid on the hospital bed, nearly dying from her own magic and of poison. And I remember laughing at my younger brother as he became crippled. Indeed, everything was due to my mother pushing me along with hostility, but the fact that I still don''t hold any deep hatred for her can only show how vile of a person I am myself.

    Surely, I can''t be blame for believing my mother''s words growing up, though. Not entirely, I mean. My father, for as long as I can remember, despised me and looked down at me as though I was nothing more than garbage. Something I grew to be. At first I believed my mother''s words, and thought that my father was simply testing me, but would one day shower me with praises and affection were I to succeed. So being a child who wanted nothing more than to be loved dearly and deeply by both parents, I could do nothing more than believe the selfish words of a vile woman.

    It''s quite pathetic thinking of how weak my mother was, and how foolish I was not realising the flaws of her beliefs. However, if the chance to relive my life were to be bestowed before me, I''d be more than willing to take hold of it in order to provide myself, and my mother, a happy ending. Because, even if she has caused damaged, I believe my mother is more than capable of living a normal life; had I not followed along with her schemes of hatred and jealousy.

 2 1

    Draco, a kind and headstrong servant of the Juntasa manor - a manor my father built to keep my mother and me away from him as far as possible without letting the public know - was someone who I owed a lot of favours to.

    He had been loyal to both my mother and I to the end, despite the way we were. On his dying bed, I had found out the reason for his loyalty was due to the connection he felt he had with me in regards of our situation. He too had a highly acclaimed father, and like me, grew up only knowing his mother''s affection. The difference, however, was that his mother died from an illness when he was ten. From there he built a path and future for himself; eventually becoming a knight before resigning at the age of twenty-nine in order to work at our manor. He was a man of honor with of a bright future, and lighted path.

    I, on the other hand, practically built a road of destruction for myself and everyone else in the manor.

    Becca and Coco, our other servants, were in their mid-thirties when they started to work for us. Two weeks after Draco''s death, the two of them were killed by being beheaded after I ordered them to try and poison my younger sister, Rose. It had been a stupid move but at that time my mindset had been focused on finding wrongs in my siblings. So I pushed my anger of losing my strongest servant onto her. In reality I should have been angry with myself because Draco only lost his life due to the fact that I had him team up with underground rebels - who I paid to kill everyone, except for my father, on the day of my brother-in-law''s coronation. Really, what a foolish person I was.

    Looking at the ex-soldier watering the roses was a strange thought. Almost as strange as the fact that someone like me was given a second chance to re-live my life. Walking over to the busy man, I called out to get his attention.

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    "Draco."

    He turned around and gave me a bright smile.

    "Little lady, what are you doing out here?" he asked, setting down the watering can and kneeling on one knee before me. I bit back a slight smile at his nickname for me. I used to hate it, to the point where I ordered him with harsh words to never call me by such a title. It was an embarrassment, was what the previous me thought. But the way his hand slipped through mine, as blood spewed from his lips during his final moments, had made me wished for a chance to hear him call me by the soft spoken title once again. A chance I now had.

    "I have a favour to ask."

    He arched an eyebrow, "What is it?"

    I held my head high, "Teach me how to fight."

    He looked at me with bewilderment, before shifting to a slightly amused look. "Are you certain that''s what you want?"

    "Very much so."

    "How about this," he said, grabbing hold my shoulders. "I''ll teach you how to fight and how to use magic once you turn five. Right now, I''m afraid you''re too small and too young."

    I pursed my lips impatiently. "Three is young, but five isn''t?"

    He shook his head, letting go of my shoulders. "Five is young as well, but nobles tend to usually gain their magic at five. And once you do gain your powers, your stamina will also improve. That being said, girls usually go into etiquette and such, but knowing you, I''m sure you can handle both types of training."

    I look up at the older man who began to water the flowers again. He looked so at peace compared to his final moments after he was ordered to commit suicide by drinking poison when his betrayal came to light. A slight sting nibbled at my heart. "Why do you trust me so?" I asked the very question that haunted me for years. Because while we were both illegitimate children, my past foul acts were more than enough for him to realize that I was nothing more than a stuck-up and blinded brat. Yet he never left my side. Not then, and probably not now.

    "Because, little lady," he smiled gently, "I see flames in your eyes that I see in my own."

    I could only hold back a bitter smile at his words. Our flames...were nothing alike, and I hope it never is.

 3 2

    After I re-awoke, I moved out from sharing a room with my mother and received my own room. In the first place, nobles weren''t even supposed to share a room with their parents, but to cease her loneliness, my mother ignored the tradition. In my last life, I shared a room with her up until I was five.

    The closet inside my ''new'' room was filled with variety of dresses; ones I would dream to have again after I was exiled and stripped of my title. Yet, as I look at them now, I could not help but long for the simple clothing I had back when I was a commoner. Indeed they were dirty and old, but they had been a reminder that I had sins to make up for. They were also a reminder of how hard I had to work to simply have one meal a day ¨C something that is often overlooked when from a household full of riches.

    I sighed as there was not a single pants was seen in sight. In a matter of two months I was going have to face my first step to living a better life, but it was going to be hard to accomplish if I were to wear a dress. I looked down at my hand and let it become cool. Frosts began to form eventually turn into an ice cube before I retracted them. Luckily my powers re-awakened with me, however it was still slightly uncontrollable due to the sudden downsize of my body. With a little more practice it should be more than enough though. Pursing my lips, I made my way out to the garden and walked up to Coco and Becca who were attending my mother.

    "Mother," I greeted, clutching the tips of my dress and giving a formal bow. She smiled, "Ice, darling, is everything alright?"

    I looked at Coco and Becca who stood out in the sun and busied themselves with fanning my mother who was happily eating desserts. Sweat glided down their faces as they put on strained smiles in front of me. Seeing such a scene reminded me one of the reason as to why I led a tragic life.

    "Don''t you think you''re being too much by asking Coco and Becca to fan you out in the scorching sun?" I asked my mother, my eyebrows furrowing.

    She looked at me in surprise. Her slender hands paused from reaching for another sweet. She gave me a questioning gaze, but I knew that she was threatening me; daring me to repeat my rude words.

    "I said aren''t you being too much?"

    She gave me a slanted smile before leaning back in her chair. "What are you saying, Ice? They''re servants. It''s their job to serve us nobles."

    My mother could be kind to others if she wanted to ¨C I''ve seen it once before when she gave out a loaf of bread to a beggar on the streets, yet she never took the servants into considerations due to her beliefs that because they were being paid, they were to work without complaints. My glare intensified as I clenched my fist. "While indeed it''s their job to look after us, we in turn still have to make sure that they are being treated fairly."

    "That being said, mother," I couldn''t help but sneer, "a noble is one of the last things we are."

    She slammed her fist onto the table, causing a vibration that sent some of the desserts falling down. "How dare you, a mere three year old, say such a despicable thing?"

    Here it was, her anger that used to drive me into fear and obedience. Years after her death, and I began to live as a commoner, I would imagine how different my life would''ve been had I spoke against her when she would get angry.

    "It is the simple truth. Do you think I''m a blind? I''ve seen you do nothing more than lay around. Were we truly nobles you''d either be working, or I''d have a father figure working. But I''ve seen no ''father'', meaning you''re probably nothing more than an abandoned mistress ¨C a mistress that will one day be kicked out."

    I hadn''t planned to say such things, but perhaps it was for the better to tell her now rather than later.

    "Shut up!" her eyes flashed with anger. Coco and Becca visibly flinched at her outburst, looking at me with pleading eyes to stop. But I won''t, not when I''ve just started.

    "I don''t where you developed such vocabularies, but you have no right to say foolish things to me. I am your mother and you shall listen to me. We are nobles by blood, and one day you shall ascend the throne."

    I forcibly held back the urge to gag. "What throne? Are you telling me that my father is the king? If that''s the case then why aren''t we already at the palace instead of this manor? Open your eyes, even if I do carry his blood, we are lower than the royal family!"

    It was the truth, even if I did have his blood, I also carried the blood of a mistress that drugged her way into a marriage. I also failed to obtain his fiery red hair and eyes and instead had black hair and eyes like my mother. The only way someone could truly believe I was his child was due to my second element; fire.

    "Get out of my sight!" she ordered. "Becca, go lock her up and don''t you dare feed her anything until she apologizes."

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    "Mada-" Becca began to plead, but stopped when my mother glared at her. Putting down the fan and letting out a quiet sigh, she motioned for me to walk back to the house. I huffed and walked away.

    "You should apologize, milady. It''s already been two days. I''m sure you''re starving by now," Becca said. I continued to read through one of my history book I had Coco bring me yesterday to counter my boredom. A smirk nearly made my way at the idea of starving. I''ve gone longer than two days without food before.

    "She''ll never learn if you let her continue this kind of behavior, Becca," I stated. Becca gave me a weak and helpless look, unsure how a child like me had such a superior way of thinking. "There''s no need to worry. I''ll be fine. But I need you to do me a favour."

    Setting my book aside, I got up and made my way to one of my drawers, pulling out a bag of silvers and gold. Becca looked at me with confusion.

    "I need you to go and buy me some pants, and commoners clothing." I said. Becca sputtered in bewilderment, "W-What?"

    I handed the bag over to Becca, "Feel free to buy something for yourself and the others with any extra money."

    "I''d be happy to carry out your orders, milady. However, whatever are you going to use them for?"

    I smirked. "That shall be information only available to me."

    Becca sighed, "I can''t read you these days, milady. First you start to speak with such etiquette, then you go and stand up for us servants, and now this."

    I smiled slightly. "Hurry along, and don''t let my mother know."

    "Very well."

    As Becca left, I re-opened my book.

    For nearly five days, I spent my time in my room doing nothing but reading books and practicing my magic. My mother remained stubborn and kept me locked in, but on the fourth day she began to have Coco deliver me food. I honestly didn''t need the food as I was content with simply eating the ice cubes I would make, but it was quite helpful when I decided to practice higher level techniques.

    On the fifth day she came barging into my room with a gloomy look.

    "Fine," she had mumbled. "You win this round. I''ll try to treat the servants a little...nicer. However, I stand to my words when I say that one day you shall ascend the throne."

    I simply sighed that day but let it be. I was well aware that convincing her would take time, and that I couldn''t let my anger let the best of me again.

 4 3

    I opened my closet. At the corner was the numerous outfits Becca bought for me. As I finished changing, I extended my arm using my magic to unlock the door, and peered out my bedroom door to make sure all the residence had gone to sleep. Seeing the hall now pitch black, I closed the door shut. Stalking over to the window, I pushed my stool in front of it and unlocked the window and jumped out. With the help of my ice, I was able to silently and quickly make my way through the forest and to the side of the castle where my half older sister''s, Luna, room was.

    A shadow figured arrived a few seconds before me. I sneered. In the original timeline the assassin failed to kill Luna, but succeeded in poisoning her. Tragedy occurred when she got sicker the older she got. It was brushed off as her magic being too strong, but the moment she showed signs of letting out icy breath and shivering, her diagnoses was changed to poison. However, there was no cure for the specific poison, and nearly too late to find one. All they could do was prolong her life. At the age of twenty-six, she passed away. I had, too, been fed that poison, but only on the day of my exile which was two years after Luna died. And while the nation cried for their princess as a grand funeral was held for her, I had no one and died a lonesome death in a rundown home built by my own hands.

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    He was crouched down with a sword held tightly in his hand. Taking out a small needle I reshaped it to that of a sword and launched behind him. He turned around abruptly and swore as he blocked off my attack. Jumping back, I took in his appearance. He smirked as he took in the fact that I was a mere child and swung his sword. I jumped up and breathed out, making sure he didn''t notice what I was doing. The tip of his sword grazed me as he changed his direction of attack. Landing, I launched forward, only to slide back as I controlled the Ice I created underneath him to latched onto him and make him fall. As he laid on the ground trying to recover from the sudden force of impact on his head due to the fall, I ran and pierced my sword through him, not giving him any chance to fight back.

    He coughed up a fit of blood and struggled to escape before settling down and breathing his last breath. Taking out the sword and shaping it back into a needle. I threw the needle onto his body and froze it along with him before shattering them into pieces. Once the morning came, both the needle and the man would melt away under the sun. However, I hesitated to let the pieces of ice remain like this in case a guard passed by later on. Raising one of my hand, I let the original cold feel from my hand be engulfed by burning flames and threw down a fireball on what was once a human and needle.

    As the last of the evidence melted, I ran back to my room and closed the window. Looking down at my leg, blood oozed out slightly. I frowned deeply as I made my way to the bathroom to wash away the blood and bandaged the wound.

    I guess this was karma for how everything I done.

 5 1

    Draco was a terrifying being. The years I''ve known him, I always concluded to myself that he was too much of an easy-going individual. Yet, he surprised me on my fourth birthday when he agreed to teach me magic after witnessing me make frozen dessert for my mother in secret. I was a prodigy, he stated. I should have taken in caution of the way his eyes gleamed under the sunlight that day. But it wasn''t until he started to teach me that I truly begin to understand why he was nominated to the commander of the royal military. He was one hell of a trainer. No matter how much I panted and stated I needed time off, something I rarely ever did, he would shut me up by threatening to add in more intense training. Such treatment was something I didn''t even experience at the academy.

    My mother, who surprisingly did not mind our training, would only watch in what I believed to be amusement as she sipped tea with Coco and Becca -- a strange and new development that occur a few weeks after I made up with my mother. The three of them also took the time to start sewing me new training clothing, ones with materials that could withstand the training.

    Two months into countless reading and magic training, Draco shoved me into a battlefield, stating that I was more than ready to take on weapons. I could only bury my face into my hands at his sudden change in attitude. One moment he was treating me with caution, the next he was shoving me onto the ground with full impact while stating I would be dead had it been a real enemy. His style was unpredictable and vicious, so unlike the assassin I faced more than a year ago. He was a true warrior; one that had seen a bloody battlefield, while that assassin had probably received little to no training. To think I had been foolish enough to let myself be grazed by that weak man.

    I had been so focused on training with Draco that I failed to notice how fast time was passing by. One moment I was three, the next I was turning five - an age I was not prepared to face. It didn''t matter how hard I tried to calm down, the anxiety of what was to take place was unstoppable. He, my father, was to arrive sometime in the morning - on the day of April First - for a visit despite the notice stating he would arrive in the afternoon. After all, his precious daughter and first child, Luna, was turning eleven on the same day I was turning five. So, as he favoured her, it only made sense that he''d rather get the visit over and done with in order to solely focus on her afterward. In my last life, he had been quick to see if my magic awakened -leaving as soon as it was confirmed I had ice magic. His visit had been one of the longest time, lasting for at least ten minutes, I ever stood in his presence - other than the day he decided to exile me and drugged me with poison. Luckily because my magic had already been awakened, I could shorten the visit.

    I looked up at the clear sky reminiscing the times when I would wonder the dark forest in hopes of finding something edible; the times when I would work the crops and later clean myself off in the stream; and the times when I truly understand what it meant to be human. And as crazy as it sounds, living the life of a noble again only made me want to experience the hardship of being independent even more. I craved to dig my hand into the dirty soils as I dug for worms to catch fishes with, to hurt myself as I cut down branches to place in the fire pit, and do so much more.

    I despised such a life at first, but it eventually became a lifestyle that I was fine with living. Yes, I was extremely poor, and struggled to even get one meal a day during my first year, and the last remaining days I spent dying a painfully cold death. But I deserved it. I deserved whatever karma was there for me because of the evil I committed.

    A fiery and intimidating presence pushed me out of my thoughts. Sucking in a breath, I quickly got off the swing Draco made for me, and bowed.

    "Your majesty," I greeted, trying to hide the panic in my voice. He was here a lot earlier than last time. Luckily my mother wasn''t around to cling onto me like last time since I hid the letter informing the manor of his visit. I continued to look down at the ground, not daring to meet his gaze. Truth was, I didn''t need to meet his gaze to know that he was glaring down at me. That was what he had done last time after all; his scorching red eyes had held great resentment and disgust towards me. I didn''t want to see such a look again.

    "Ice Juntasa?" he spoke up. There was a slight sting when I heard the way he spoke my name as though it was something revolting. "Are you aware of the reason for my visit?"

    "Yes, fa-your majesty," I replied. As much as I wish to call him father, I can''t lie and say I don''t hold any bitterness towards him. Besides, once I leave the castle, it would be taboo to call him father. Thus it was best I start to regard him as his majesty from now on. Extending both my hands, I began to cloud it with cold mists. Concentrating on the particles that began to swirl together and form ice, I began carving out the details of a flower. My favorite one; the tiger lily. In my last life, there was only so much I could do while living in isolation. So I began to take up sculpting with both wood and ice as a hobby. The tiger lily had been one of my first sculptures, hence gaining the spot as my favourite flower.

    There was silence as I dispersed the ice after a solid minute. I waited for him to walk away if he didn''t wish to say anything. The minutes continued to turn alongside the awkward and uncomfortable silence. It was only broken by the sound of Draco''s confused greeting.

    "Your majesty?"

    "Dracule," his majesty greeted back.

    "What are you doing here?" Draco, or Dracule, asked. His majesty raised an eyebrow, eyes filled equal confusion.

    "It is her fifth birthday, is it not?" His majesty clarified, looking down at my small structure. I dare not look up as I shuffled back slightly behind Draco. Tugging slightly on his pants, I looked up at him with pleading eyes in hopes that he would not expose me. The confusion that was once plastered on his face began to fade and was replaced with a sly look.

    "Oh, that''s right!" he exclaimed, "I apologize, your majesty. I forgot that nobles tend to usually awaken their magic at this age."

    "Hmm," his majesty replied. I felt my heart drop a little at his tone.

    "You''re not one to usually forget though, Dracule," his majesty stated. I bit back the urge to curse at how sharp he was.

    However, rather than being thrown off, Draco continued to smile. "That''s true. However, the little lady has awakened her magic since last year so you can''t blame me for forgetting."

    I felt the aura of his majesty grow, "If that was the case why didn''t you report to me?"

    Draco chuckled, "Why, you told me not to report to you."

    I felt my heart sting at the words that Draco muttered. I was well aware of the fact that his majesty hated me, but he was still my father; a father I once hoped to gain affections from. He will never love me though. Never. His majesty let out an awkward cough, "I see. Then I''ll be on my way."

    As his majesty left, Draco and I remained standing. Looking up, I noticed Draco peering down at me with a mysterious smile. My throat tightened.

    "Now that he''s gone, mind telling where you hid the note, and why?"

    "Because," I said, "I didn''t want my mother knowing."

    The wind blew gently. Draco remained silent at my answer before reaching down and picking me up. It felt foreign being held in someone''s arms. Only my mother ever carried me, but she stopped once I turned two.

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    "Don''t worry," Draco said softly, "One day you''ll live a happier life."

    I smiled. One could only hope.

 6 2

    Kazu''s P.O.V

    She was different from how he originally perceived she would be. She hadn''t tried to win his favour nor have an ignorant aura. When he first saw her in the distance, she looked serene but as though she wasn''t truly there. One could say it was as if her mind and soul belonged elsewhere far away.

    And in terms of appearance, he had expected her to bear her mother''s dark hair and eyes rather than his fiery hair and eyes, but he did notice the similarities when it came to the shape of their eyes and ears. However, he hadn''t expected for her to also have magic that was the exact opposite of his. Fire was said to dominate all other magic, other than the rare ones like the light magic his daughter, Luna, had. She had looked quite fearful of him too, as though one wrong move could end her life. It offended him a little as he wasn''t as cruel as to end a child''s life. Besides, the one he held a grudge against was not her, but rather that sly and cunning mother of hers; Mali Juntasa. The only reason he didn''t bother to visit her up until now was because he didn''t want to bother to see Mali, and now he had to deal with his the fact that his own blood saw him as a potential murderer.

    "Daddy!" a cheery voiced called. Snapping out of his thoughts, he grinned at the sight of Luna running towards him. Her matching red eyes and hair shining brightly as it was met with the light coming through the windows. He crouched down and pulled her into a hug.

    "Happy Birthday, sweetie," he said, placing a kiss on her forehead. Luna giggled, letting off an innocent charm.

    "Thank you, daddy! Where did you go? I went to find you earlier but mommy said you were busy."

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    "I just needed to make a quick visit. Nothing important."

    Luna nodded and smiled before scrunching her eyebrows and looking down at the ground. His smile faded at her expression.

    "What''s the matter, Luna?" he asked, kneeling before her.

    She looked up at him, worry flashing through her eyes before she shook her head and smiled again. "It''s nothing! Let''s go find mommy!"

    While he wanted to ask her more questions, he let it go and continued down the hall as he held Luna''s hand.

 7 3

    "Do you want to go downtown with me, little lady?" Draco asked, peering down at me as I sat on the swing. It had been officially a week since I turned five.

    I looked up at him, a slight smile formed. Nodding, I got off the swing and walked back to the mansion to change into more suitable clothing for outings. After grabbing a bag to place my money in, I met up with Draco who had prepared the carriage and was waiting for me in front of the gate. We arrived at the town. Getting off the carriage with the helping hand of Draco, I couldn''t help but feel slight anxiety. It had been years since I last stepped foot into the familiar part of this kingdom. The last time I saw it was on the day I was to be exiled. It had been a cold and terrifying memory as people all stood on the side, throwing rocks and stones at me as vile words were shouted. I deserved every inch of their hatred though.

    Whenever I had gone to town, I''d throw tantrums and treat the workers as though they were dirt. However, none of them ever dared to say anything back due to my position.

    "I have to go pick up some documents. Would you like me go with me or wonder around?" Draco questioned. The amount of trust he had in me was amazing. Even I didn''t trust myself.

    "I want to wonder," I replied, looking around to see if there was anything interesting to take buy. Draco ruffled my hair and gave me a toothy grin. "I''ll be back around the evening. Just meet me at the water fountain. It''ll be easy to spot," he said before heading off.

    The first store I saw was Sun Burst, an antique store that was slowly going out of business. It used to be a place I avoided. I had deemed it to be dirty and trash because of the physical appearance. Breathing in, I decided to walk towards it and entered. The bell attached to the door rung and I was met with the scent of old books. A fragile old man came walking over to me, a soft smile present on his face.

    "Hello there, young lady," he greeted. I nodded, unsure as to what to say.

    "Is there anything you''re looking for?" he asked. I shook my head, "I''m just going to take a look around if that''s okay."

    He laughed, "Why of course! Feel free to call for me if you need help with anything."

    I walked around, eyes glazing over old objects, and stopping to skim through the variety of books. A glistering light coming from the corner of the room drew my attention. Striding over, I found myself blown away by the necklace on display. While I wasn''t into owning luxury items anymore, the beautifully carved lotus flower - which appears to be made from a moonstone - attached to the thin leather was truly captivating. I reached out to grab it, but another pair of hands grabbed it before me. Looking back, I found the words I wanted to say get stuck in my throat. I had always known my luck was bad, but never to this extent.

    I stumbled back slightly, and prepared myself to leave but was stopped.

    "Oh, sorry. I hope I didn''t startle you. I just thought this necklace was rather beautiful." There was a pause, "Did you perhaps want it?"

    Taking a deep breath, I dared myself to look up.

    Golden hair and calm brown eyes smiled down at me. While it looked as though the individual was a gentle and carefree person, I knew better than to let their looks deceive me. Standing in front of me was my private tutor, Margret - back in my old life, that is. I had hoped to never meet her again, but here she was in front of me, the same ''innocent'' appearance plastered on. I had been a fool to trust her; she who only wanted to make a name for herself; she who secretly looked down on half-bloods and called them filthy pigs.

    "I don''t want it," I answered, trying to hold back the disgust in my voice. I was well aware of her intention. She had always held keen eyes and was able to distinguish who was a noble or not. That was precisely why she approached me in my previous life and tried so hard to win the heart of the seven year old me by using sweet, sugar-coating words. Despite the servants'' warnings, I had thrown tantrums just to get her to be my tutor, and sure enough, she threw me away once she got what she wanted. After all I did to help her become my tutor and change people''s perspective of her, she betrayed me by stealing my first fianc¨¦, the son of a duke, and had the audacity to shed crocodile tears when I tried confronting her. It was because of her that my second engagement was to a man years above me; who already held a wife, a daughter, and was far too perverted. Luckily I didn''t have to marry him as I was exiled. Thinking back, Margret did more than just stealing my fianc¨¦, I''m sure she was one of the main individuals to spread rumours about me.

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    "Are you-?"

    "I don''t need it," I repeated, casting her a cold gaze. I walked past her and towards the owner who looked down at me kindly. "Find anything you like?" he asked.

    I originally only wanted the necklace but now that it was touched by that woman, I didn''t want it anymore.

    "I''d like to buy all the books, please," I stated. He looked at me in astonishment. While he didn''t appear to doubt the amount of money I had, he did look worried at the amount of books that would need to be carried. Nonetheless, he bid to my request and packed all the books for me. From the corner of my eyes, I could see that she had not left yet and was quietly observing me, waiting for an opportunity.

    "That would be five silvers," the owner said, surprising me. I looked over at three stacks of books and felt giddy that they were worth so little. After being exiled, saving money was one of the first things I taught myself once I regained my senses. I had been slightly reluctant but sold my luxurious items I managed to carry with me for the money. From there, I had stored it away for the winter when the plants withered away and catching animals became difficult. A town had been about an hour and a half away from the forest, and two hours from my house. But it took about a thirty minutes or so if I used my magic to slide to town. And from time to time I would also sell the sculptures I made for some extra money.

    However, as happy as I was to have to pay so little, seeing the situation of the store, I settled down and gave him five gold instead. He looked down at them with wide eyes and gaping mouth.

    "I can''t accept this," he said, trying to give the money back to me. I shook my head, "I insist you take it. Instead, can you deliver this to me in the afternoon? I can''t carry them all by myself."

    "I can help you carry them!" I averted my eyes at the sound of Margret''s voice. The owner smiled sheepishly at Margret before nodding. "That''s right, she can help you. So please, there''s no need to pay so much for such old books like these."

    I let out a sigh and looked at her, "I''ll be walking around and checking out other stores for a while, so I doubt you''d want to carry so many books for that long, or wait until then."

    Her face turned red as she struggled to find a reply.

    The owner coughed, "If that''s the case, then it shall be delivered to you. However, I''m quite old, so if you don''t mind, may I send my grandson to deliver it instead?"

    I nodded, "Then have him deliver it at around the water fountain during the evening. Well, I''ll be going now."

    I left the store quickly.

    After I left Sun Burst, I decided to walk around and see what other items I could buy. I stopped walking when I saw a weaponry shop titled, Starlight''s. If I remember correctly, it was well known and a popular choice for nobles to buy weapons. Even the previous sword I used in my past life was made from here. However, I never personally visited myself as Draco had been in charge of requesting my sword for me. Indeed, the weapons were crafted beautifully, but the sword that I had barely held up with my magic capacity and therefore caused me to hold back. After I had been banished, I has assumed that the sword would help me get by but within a week, it had shattered to pieces due to my magic being too overwhelming. I had barely used all of my magic then. Who knows just how much more powerful I could get with a weapon that could withstand my magic.

    Tilting my head as I observed the amount of customers coming and going, I could only shake my head at how easily people were blinded by brand names and appearances. Looking around once again, I found another weaponry shop named, Twin Moons. Compared to Starlight''s, it was a lot smaller and didn''t seem to be getting customers. Thinking carefully, I decided to take the chance and walk towards it. Walking in, I found little to no weapons. The weapons themselves looked shoddy.

    "Well-welcome!" a voice squeaked out. I turned my gaze to look at a boy who appeared no older than twelve.

    I nodded as I picked up a dagger on display. From the corner of my eyes I could see the boy was rather nervous. Probably due to the fact that he was not used to customers, and that I was a child. Gripping harder, I released some of my magic to see if it could withhold. A cold smile etched at my face when it didn''t shatter. I decided to release all my magic, causing a drastic drop in the room temperature. Once again the dagger managed to remain intact. Who would''ve thought I''d find something of worth at a place I once looked down on.

    Putting the dagger back down, I looked at the boy.

    "Where''s the owner?" I asked.

    He rubbed the back of his neck, his eyes cast down on the ground.

    "I''m the owner," he replied. I looked at him in surprise before regaining my usual stoic expression.

    "I''m impressed," I said. "If you can, will you craft me a weapon?"

    He looked at me in surprise, before his eyes started to shine in happiness.

    "O-Of course! What would you like?"

    I thought about it. While I was most used to a sword, my body was currently too small to handle a real sword. I did use a sword to kill the assassin after Luna, but it had been made out of the ice I manifested and not steel. Meaning, every time I was to fight, I''d use up magic quicker. Whereas if I to get a weapon, it''d save me the trouble of having to use magic and I could last in fights longer. For now, it would be best to buy a dagger, but having a dagger had quite a few disadvantage for me as well since it meant for closer attack needed in order to harm my opponent.

    "Perhaps," I said, "you can make me a shape shifting weapon?"

    Shape shifting weapons existed but were rare. Only true black smiths who''ve trained for years and were able to have full access to their mana - while the majority of population could access eighty-percent at most -could pull off making them. From what I know, it takes about a month to make one. Sometimes it takes even longer than a month depending on the size of the weapon and how much capacity it needs to withhold. I was pushing my luck towards this boy, but if he was able to make better weapons than Starlight''s at this age, then I''m sure he''s capable of making a shape shifter.

    "A shape shifter, huh?" he mumbled to himself. I observed him. There was obvious hesitation before he looked at me with gleaming determination.

    "I accept!"

    I smirked at his response.

    "My name is Ice, Ice Juntasa."

    He smiled shyly, "I''m Philip, Philip Crew."

    "You''re quite young to be owning your own weaponry shop, aren''t you?" I asked.

    His eyes turned sullen, "It actually belonged to my great grandfather and was supposed to go down to my dad. But my dad passed away a year after my grandfather did, leaving me to take responsibility. But no one trusts a child to make their weapons so eventually people stop coming. Not too long after, Starlight appeared."

    "Hmm," I replied. "Well, now you have a request."

    "I need you to make a dagger and sword combination. A simple design, nothing that will catch attention. My magic is ice so it''d be nice if you could incorporate a way for it to stay cold at all times as it easier for me to user stronger spells when I''m in contact with cold objects or temperatures."

    The reality was, I had fire magic as well. I had been quick to switch to using fire entirely in my last life as I felt it drew me closer to my father. However, while living on my own, I began to use ice more often again as the level I could use my ice element was more dominant than the level I could use my fire element. And now that I''ve been given this chance, I''m going to hold onto it and train with it even more. I''m not saying I won''t use my fire, but I won''t allow anyone to see it as it might jeopardize the opportunities to leave the palace (or rather the manor I was currently residing in). It didn''t stop me from getting exiled in my last life, but that was only because I committed multiple offenses ¨C something I would much rather avoid doing this time.

    Philip wrote down my explanation with full concentration. I did feel quite bad that I was giving him such a hard request, but all the requirements needed to be fulfilled perfectly if I was going to use the weapon for the long run. That being said, with Ice being an uncommon magic in this kingdom, it was hard to find a place that was willing to comply with making a weapon for it. Even in my previous life, Draco had to pay at least ten hundred gold coins just to get them to make me a weapon. And the stupid weapon wasn''t even all that good.

    "How much?" I asked, taking out my bag of money.

    "Fifteen silvers should be enough," he said. I shook my head. He looked at me nervously, "Is that too much?" he asked, "I could go lower-"

    "Hundred gold," I said, placing the amount on top of the counter. "Another hundred will be added if you do a good job."

    He looked at me, flustered that I offered such a large amount of gold. I would''ve offered more, but I''m currently on a budget as I have several things I need to buy later on. Besides, I wasn''t too clear as to where his skills laid.

    "When do you think you''ll be done?"

    "You should be able to pick it up next week."

    I looked at him in surprise before nodding. "Very well, I''ll see you then."

    "Ah, wait," he pulled out an orb. "I need to measure your magic."

    Placing my hand on the object, I put in my full magic. It glowed brightly before showing different statistics. Phillip hurriedly copied down the results, his eyes widening here and then. Looking up at me, he gave me an awed look, much to my curiosity, before bowing. "Have a nice day!" he squeaked. I gave a small bow and left.

 8 4

    I have now officially bought a weapon and several books. The question now was, what else was needed? Perhaps I could purchase a home in a village, but doing so would raise suspicion if any royal spies caught wind of it. I could purchase more magical items like a storage bag, or a familiar. Storage bags could easily be bought, but a familiar was hard to find considering most of the ones in store were low levels, and the ones in auctions were sold at expensive prices. There was a forest around the manor, so maybe I could capture a familiar there. Though, most would probably be low level ones as well. Scrunching my nose, I decided to walk to a nearby bakery and get a small snack before exploring again.

    As I walked down the busy streets with a bag of goods, my eyes landed on the sight of a girl around my age crouched between two tall buildings. Not only did she appear to be in a disastrous state with her messy hair and ripped, muddy clothing, but also appeared to be malnourished with how skinny her arms and legs were. Her soft weeping amongst the noisy street brought an aching pain to my chest as I observed how people walked by without a care. I know very well what it''s like to be both the passerby and the one without food. I walked towards her and crouched down.

    "Hey," I said. She looked up at me with startled purple eyes, flinching back as though she was going to be hit. The aching grew. So she had been abused as well... It wasn''t uncommon for the poor to be treated harshly, but it didn''t make the idea any less cruel.

    "Here," I offered her the bag of food. While I could easily get more, I doubt she could. I could offer her silvers or gold, but I know from my past mistakes that she would only be accused of stealing it.

    She looked at the bag with caution before reaching out and accepting it. I smiled and raised my hand to pet her on the head, her eyes widening in surprise.

    "You''ve got such beautiful eyes, so don''t cry too much," I said softly, hoping it would soothe her a little.

    After handing her the food and getting up, I found that the girl trailing behind me while tightly holding onto the bag of goods I just gave her. I didn''t mind since she looked trustworthy. Perhaps she could become a maid at the manor where she''d at least be given shelter and food. My mother wasn''t aggressive towards the servants as she used to be either. So the girl wouldn''t have to worry about being abused. However, I wasn''t going to stop and offer her the job. She needs to be the one to speak up and approach me. I can''t accept those who are weak minded to enter my manor. Not like I once did.

    As I arrived at the fountain, I found a figure awaiting for me with the stacks of books. He looked about ten and had silver hair and eyes, traits not usually seen in commoners. A cold smile formed when he saw me walking towards him, causing me to unconsciously gulp. Excluding the encounter with fa-his majesty, I had not felt fear this intense after awakening once again. There was something off about him. Perhaps it was his dead eyes, or the way his aura cornered him with loneliness. But there was more - I could sense there was something more. Someone like him...surely could not be the grandson of the old man, nor could he be a commoner.

    "You must be the one to make the purchases," he said, his voice surprisingly soothing. Yet, there was a sense of familiarity to it, as though I had heard it before.

    "And you must be the grandson. Thank you for delivering them."

    He raised an eyebrow, giving me a long and strange gaze. I shifted, feeling uncomfortable under his gaze. He wasn''t that much taller than me, and was five years older than me at most, yet somehow he carried himself like he was far older, and had seen far worse than I''ve ever had.

    "Jiro," he held out his hand, "Jiro Jugo."

    I gripped his hand with my own gloved one, "Ice Juntasa."

    "And the one behind you?"

    I raised my brow before looking at the figure lurking behind me.

    "I don''t know. She just started to follow me around."

    He whistled, amused. I looked at him suspiciously. Why did it seem like he knew something about her that I didn''t? Before I could say anything else, a familiar presence lurked up from behind me.

    "Little lady?"

    I shifted my gaze to Draco who looked at the scene before him with a sly smirk. "Made some friends already?" he asked.

    I merely ignored his remarks, "I need you to help me with these books."

    He looked at the books in interest before picking them up with ease. Nodding my head at the boy, Jiro, I began to walk away. A few steps away, I noticed the girl hadn''t followed me. I sighed and stopped in my tracks. "You can come along," I said. There was slight surprise in her eyes before she gave a shy smile and began to walk behind me and Draco.

    Getting home, Draco helped get the books into my room. He had offered to take them to the library we had but I rejected his offer.

    "What shall we do with her?" he asked, referring to the curious and cautious girl standing in the corner.

    "I''ll handle it," I stated, leading him out of the room.

    "Just scream if anything happens," he replied, giving one more glance to the girl before walking away. As he disappeared into the distance, I closed the door tightly. I took a seat at one of the chairs by the windows, motioning for the girl to sit down on the chair next to mine. She did so, her arms still carrying the bag of goods. "Do you have a name?" I asked.

    She shook her head.

    "Do you at least know how to speak?"

    There was a pause before a soft murmuring, ''yes'', escaped from the frail girl. Her voice was weak and had a slight crack at the end of her word. Most likely she was not used to speaking at all.

    "You shall be named Opal as of today. As for what position you shall have in this mansion¡­well, we''ll have you start off as a maid, but later as something else if you manage to find something to pursue."

    I could feel a sudden rush of an energy come from the girl as she took in my words ¨C alarming me in the process as I realized what the boy Jiro was so amused about.

    The girl in front of me¡­ She wasn''t human, but rather a familiar. As quick as the energy hit me, it was equally as quick to disappear. The girl who had let out a small smile before suddenly started to shiver in fear; almost although she was awaited for me to punish her for what she had unconsciously just done.

    "You," I started, taking in the appearance of the girl once again, "aren''t human?"

    She whimpered and covered the top of her head in fear. I pursed my lips, wondering what I should do now that the circumstances have changed. It was quite hard to meet, or find familiars that could shift into humans. Most often they were found during bidding''s amongst the rich, so making a contracts with her would benefit me. However, at the same time there were risks that came with owning her. For one, she may already have an existing contract that hasn''t been properly terminated. I also wasn''t certain as to what higher race she may belong to, nor how long I would continue a life as a noble.

    "I won''t force you to sign a contract, nor will I ever lay a hand on you in such unruly manners¡­Opal."

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    Getting up from the chair, I walked over to my closet and pulled out some of my more casual outfits. Opal who was now standing, had tears glistering down. I handed her the clothing and gently wiped away her tears. "Since I know familiars are loyal beings, and will do anything for those who are their master, or friends, know that I won''t ever go down a path that may force you to do harm of any sorts. Lest it''s to protect ourselves that is."

    "Thank you, ma''am."

    "No need to be so formal," I waved my hands in a nonchalant motion. Later that evening, I formally introduced her to the others in the manor. Becca and Coco were quick to settle her in and befriend her.

 9 5

    Something about today felt uneasy. It wasn''t the extra figure added to the manor, nor the change in season that made the day feel different. Somewhere in my gut I knew that a storm was awaiting for me. Perhaps I was to be called upon by the castle; something that rarely happened in my past life. Perhaps, I was to face an old enemy that had yet to be faced. Lurking down the hall, I silently passed by my mother who was humming to herself as she sewed, then Coco who was teaching Opal the basic of cleaning, and finally, Draco and Becca who were in the kitchen- one cooking, the other taking out plates. I lead myself into the slightly cold outside, and walked towards the wilting roses. My heart began to beat louder and harder with each approaching step. My eyes gleamed and my senses heightened. I did not stop though. Instead I continued further past the roses and into the maze that my mother and the servants always warned me to avoid unless I had someone to watch over me.

    Walking further in until I found a small bench to sit on, I let out the breath I did not realize I was holding. I had decided to sit down gently and with slight caution on the cold bench, looking up at the darkened sky afterward. Sure enough, as I let the calm take hold of me, I decided to speak up.

    "Mind telling me what you''re doing here?" I asked, a slight puff of air showing up.

    A small laughed bellowed out, "You really are different."

    I continued to look up at the sky, "And you really aren''t a commoner.''''

    He walked out from his hiding and stood in front of me, leaning towards my face a little and blocking the view of the sky.

    "What do you want?" I asked, reaching out my hand and poking his forehead with my gloved finger. He glided smoothly and took a seat next to me.

    "You interest me," he said. Unexpectedly, he grabbed strands of my black hair and began to twirl it. Now or then, I have never truly liked physical contact, especially from strangers. I slapped his hand away and gave him a hard look. He gave a teasing grin in return.

    "I won''t rule you off as an assassin or anything, but I suggest you never come back," I warned.

    He gave a small gasp, grasping his chest in a dramatically manner, "So cold."

    I stood up and began to trace my way back, only to stop when the branches and leaves began to grow rapidly and block my way. "What''s the meaning of this?" I asked.

    "I just want to talk," he pouted. I gritted my teeth. It was pointless to use my magic, but speaking to him was also a waste of time. "I don''t have time to entertain a suspicious person like you."

    He walked in front of me, and leaned in. "If you stay and talk to me, I''ll gladly give you something you might just like."

    I raised an eyebrow and crossed my arms. However, before I could reply I heard Becca''s startling cry.

    "Milady! Where are you?!"

    He leaned away from me and sighed, "I guess we''ll have to continue another time. Later!"

    He retracted the branches and leaves before disappearing my sight. I shook my head and made my way out of the maze and towards the voice of Becca.

    Becca appeared to be on the verge of tears when I found her. "What''s the matter-" I was cut off by her unexpectedly grabbing me by the hand and dragging me indoors.

    "His majesty is here!" she stated in a frenzy. I went numb at the mention of his majesty. He wasn''t supposed to come back. He had no reason to come back. Biting back the fear of what was to happen, I allowed myself to be dragged along by Becca. We stopped in front of the living room door. Becca who was previously out of breath quickly fixed her messy hair and crouched down to help smooth out my dress. Standing back up, she opened the door and allowed me to walk in before stepping inside the room herself and gently closing the door behind her. She strode off and stood next to Draco at the corner of the room, head held low.

    His majesty sat on the couch in the middle of the room. "Your majesty." I greeted, giving a bow. I took a seat next across from him.

    As expected, he quickly got to the point, "You have been assigned a tutor. She shall be coming here in two days to help you with the studies of magic."

    The idea of a tutor caused my blood to boil as memories resurfaced. I know for a fact that just because my previous tutor was a bad person, it doesn''t mean the others are. That didn''t mean I was going to easily trust them though, let alone allow them to enter my manor.

    "If it''s not too rude to ask, may I know who they might be?"

    "Her name is Shelly. She''s the daughter of Duke Jose from the kingdom of Hums."

    To others it would seem that he was doing me a huge favour by assigning me someone of a high status, but I knew better. Hums was the kingdom from which Luna''s mother came from. Meaning he was trying to test me, as well as cause tension, by letting someone my mother would most likely hate into our manor. But I bit back the harsh remarks I wanted to say and uttered out lies. "Thank you. It''ll be an honour."

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    Hearing my reply, he stood up. His guards that stood aside followed behind him. Once he was out of the manor, I ordered Draco and Becca not to bother me. I made my way to my room and locked myself in, the sense of loss and frustration overcoming me. It was obvious from my conversation towards his majesty that I was still too powerless to do anything. His eyes told me that I wasn''t even acceptable enough to say no. For now, it was best to go along with his request and allow myself to have a tutor. Before she was to arrive, I have cleaning up to do. First thing first, I need to visit my mother and confront her as to why she wasn''t present for his majesty''s visit. It was too weird. When I saw her a while ago, she was sewing, so she should''ve been aware of his visit. I checked the spot I last saw her but found that she was no longer there. Pursing my lips, I made my way to her bedroom.

    I knocked on the door, waiting patiently for the permission to enter her room. After a slow silence, the door creaked open and my mother greeted me. Her forehead appeared to be drenched in sweat as she forced herself to give me a smile. I felt an odd sense of insecurity as I looked up at her. She knelt down and pulled me into an unexpected hug, allowing me to feel her shivers.

    "Mother?" I whispered, my voice being carried throughout the empty hall.

    "You must always remember, Ice," she murmured softly, "that you are a Juntasa."

    Pulling away, she brushed away blacks strands of hair from my face while peering into the depth of my brown eyes. It was weird to see her act this way. In my memories, she was always a mad and cunning woman, and vulnerable to greed. But never was she just¡­vulnerable.

    My heart pace picked up at the slight hope that she was starting to change. Yet it brought me confusion as well. I hadn''t done anything to help her change. Sure, she didn''t meet my father like she was originally supposed to, but that alone was not something that could change someone. And I always knew that the name Juntasa had a special meaning, but never dwelled on it. For her to bring it up as a topic set off even more questions. At this point, planning out the next couple of years was going to be difficult.

    Everything was changing too much, and too fast.

    "Mother," I spoke up. She stood up and held my hand as we entered her room, and closed the door.

    "Hmm?"

    I looked up at her with hesitation, "His majesty came by today."

    As though as switch had been flipped, her eyes started to gleam in a familiar way. She abruptly grabbed hold of my shoulders and a smile was brought upon her face.

    "He came to see you?" she gasped. The excitement in her voice made me tremble in disgust, as well as regret for telling her. I should''ve known that someone couldn''t change that easily. I opened my mouth to answer but was cut off by her.

    "That''s wonderful!" Her grip on my shoulders became tighter, causing me to flinch. "I told you he cared for us. The wicked spell by that disgusting Hums princess must''ve worn off-"

    As she continued to ramble on, I couldn''t find it within myself to listen to anymore of her nonsense. Grabbing her wrists and forcing them off me, I raised my hand and slapped her. My vision going red as the anger I tried so hard to maintain under control finally exploded.

    "Enough! You''re a fool, a bloody fool! I''ve said it before, and I say it again, a man like him would never care or even acknowledge people like us. The only reason he visits the manor is to maintain his image as a king! Other than that we are nothing more than burdens - burdens that can easily be trashed with one wrong move."

    My mother looked at me in shock as she cupped the side of her face in which I slapped. Yes, it pained me to raise my hand at the person who was the only existing parent in my life, but words alone doesn''t seem to have effect on her.

    Letting out a puff of breath, I tried to calm myself down. "If-" I continued, "If you want me to even consider you a mother, accept the fact that nor you or I are cared for by the King."

    Her eyes started to water as she took in my words, but I ignored the guilt from the heavy words I said, and walked away. Now the choice was up to her. It was either she loses me, or she throws away the ''love'' she has for his majesty. "That being said, he hired a tutor for me. She''s from the kingdom of Hums."

    Once I left the room, I was met with the sight of a trembling Opal who appeared to be scared that she was going to be punished for witnessing something so private. I sighed, and pinched the bridge of my nose at the fact that I failed to remember there was a non-human in the manor. Looking straight into her eyes, I reached out my hand and grabbed hold of hers. The two of us walked down the hall in silence. And surprisingly, it helped me calm down some more to hold onto her hand. Perhaps it was due to her energy as a familiar.

 10 6

    After the incident with my mother, she locked herself in her room, allowing only Becca to enter her room. I made sure not to give in to the sense of guilt and kept my distance. As I sat on the floor reading through a book on war tactic, Opal sat next to me with curiosity. There was a knock on my door before it was opened and Draco peered in. I raised an eyebrow.

    "Your tutor is here," he stated, a worried smile on his face.

    I nodded, closing the book. Opal walked closely behind me as we made way to the room that Draco set up for the lesson I was to have with the tutor. As I entered the room, I gave a bow before taking in the appearance of my new tutor. I had to admit, she was beautiful - though not as nearly beautiful as Luna would grow to be. Her hair was a soft golden strawberry colour, and her eyes were a shade of soft blue, common traits amongst those from the Hums kingdom.

    "Good evening," She greeted, "Sorry for my delay. There was an accident on the way."

    She extended her hand, "The name''s Shelly."

    My brow twitched at her informal way of speaking. Whether it was because she looked down on me or not was unclear. I took hold of her hand and gave it a quick shake, not wanting my freezing temperature to be noticed by her.

    "Ice Juntasa."

    She looked at me awkwardly, slightly scratching the side of her face. "Um, shall we begin?"

    I nodded and took a seat at the desk provided. Opal who had stood behind me went to the side but I motioned for her walk over to where I was. Understanding my intention, Opal walked over with a chair she pulled from the side of the room, and the sat down next to me. Our exchange caught Shelly off guard.

    "Will she be joining us too?" she asked.

    I nodded once again. "She''ll only be here to listen."

    Clearing her throat, she got out two books; one of them was placed in front of me, and the other was kept by her.

    "I hope you don''t mind sharing the book," she said, flipping to the first page of the book.

    I followed her action, "I do not mind."

    She smiled.

    "We''ll start the lesson with some basic history," Shelly stated. "There are in total eight existing kingdoms; Hums, Kal, Fae, Su, Pheo, Hural, Sheema, and Teea. The kingdoms are separated by the categories of land, sea, and sky. The sky kingdoms are Sheema, Pheo, and Hural. Sheema is known to have female dominance, and large amounts jewels; thus making jewelleries their biggest trade.

    Next up is Pheo. Pheo is a military kingdom, and is known for its independence. Other than that, little is known as those who enter are made to sign a blood contract to not speak of their experience- that is, if they are even lucky enough to enter. The last Sky kingdom is Hural. Hural, like Pheo, is an independent kingdom. However, it is not that they have chosen to be independent but rather because the other kingdoms do not want to deal with their bloody nature."

    I felt uneasy at the mentions of Hural. I was more than aware of the bloody nature of the kingdom. In my last life, not long after I was exiled, the king of Hural was murdered by his own son who later became known as the ''red king''. I was lucky enough to avoid the war, but millions ¨C perhaps billions - were not. The red king was ruthless; killing even newborns and elders from his own kingdom to satisfy his own pleasure. Even worse, he started a war with Pheo ¨C making the war between the two kingdoms to be passed on as one of the bloodiest war to take place, as well as the longest. How it ended, I would never know, as I died before the war could be put to a stop.

    How scary it was to think that there existed kingdoms capable of running wars for such a long duration without caring to have sympathy for their citizens, or ever running out of weapons.

    The lesson went on. I didn''t bother to pay close attention as I already had knowledge about the history; I even had knowledge of the future. Opal on the other hand eagerly listened to Shelly''s teachings.

    "Well, that''ll be all for today. Any questions?" Shelly asked, closing the book.

    I looked at Opal to see if she was curious about anything but since she remained silent, I shook my head no as an answer. Shelly nodded.

    "Well then, perhaps you could escort me to my room?"

    I looked at her in confusion. Shelly should be more than aware that I have never been to the castle (upon my reawakening) due to my status as an unwanted child. The maids in the castle love to talk after all. So it wouldn''t make sense for me to take her to the castle.

    Seeing the look I gave her, she too scrunched up her face and appeared to be confused.

    "Am I not to stay at this manor?" she asked. "His Majesty informed me that there was more than enough room for me to stay with you guys."

    I merely stayed silent despite the sparks of rage forming within my heart. Opal who seemed to have sense the change in my mood, looked down at the ground. Without saying anything, I made my way to one of the guest room with Shelly trailing behind me. As for Opal, I could only assume she had gone to see Coco in order to get some more training, and to avoid me because of how I was feeling. I didn''t mind that she would rather distance herself than be near me when I was angry. I know how destructive I can become when my anger takes over. Unlike my old self though, I at least knew not to let myself say and act in a harsh matter when I was angry.

    After accompanying Shelly to the room, I didn''t bother to bid goodbye as I walked away and went back to my room. Somehow the sparks of rage cooled down and left nothing more than tiredness. I slid down and leaned against the door. Raising my hands, I covered my face and heaved a sigh.

    I have to re-plan everything. With Shelly now residing in the manor, speaking openly about leaving was something I had avoid doing ¨C not that I already presented the ideas yet. Another thing to worry about was how my mother would react to her. I sighed again. To calm the stress building up, I summoned my magic. Cold mist began to slip through my fingers. I peered down with a trace of emotions within me. As I called back the magic, spots of frostbites were left ¨C tracing the palm of my hand, and parts of my fingers. Holding out my other hand to compare, I wasn''t surprised to see that it wasn''t only one hand that was starting to show symptoms but both. I hadn''t expect that my child body would increase the effect of the poison, seeing as Luna didn''t show symptoms until later on. But I should''ve known better. Luna was gifted with light; a magic that is also capable of healing better than most. At this point I was going to die before even escaping.

    I got up from my position. Picking up the gloves on the desk and wearing them, I pulled out pen and paper. My other senses dulled as I concentrated fully on writing down ideas as to how I could leave the castle. So far the best idea was to leave alone, or with Opal, if my mother remains the same. I couldn''t risk having her ruin my chance to live a quiet life. I re-considered acting like a villain and allowing myself to be banished again, but there were too many risks that came along with it. And I had already vowed to never be the person I once was.

    A pair of warm hands suddenly grabbed my face, forcing me to turn my face to the side. Familiar silver eyes peered deeply at me. With my attention now fully shifted, the warm hands left my face. I huffed and cupped my cheeks in annoyance.

    "Is it your hobby to trespass, Sir Jugo?" I asked.

    He grinned. "Call me Jiro."

    "You didn''t answer my question, but¡­fine," I sighed, knowing it wasn''t going to be easy to get rid of him, "What are you doing here?"

    He shrugged, grabbing hold of my hair in the same manner as he did the last time we met. He was truly a strange one. If my personality didn''t drive people away, it was usually the colouring of my hair. Yet he was casually playing with it.

    "I was bored," he answered.

    I gave him a deadpanned look. "Why don''t you ask your ''grandfather'' to assign you more work then? I''m too busy to entertain you."

    "Aww, don''t be that way. I''m pretty much your only friend. Someone like you¡­isn''t easily liked."

    I felt a shard pierce my heart at his harsh words. It wasn''t like what he said wasn''t true. It was very true in fact. I never had any true friends. I''d count the servants as friends but they aren''t around my age, and majority of the times they were only around me to fulfill their duty. Perhaps I could count Opal, but I barely know her right now, and she isn''t even human. While I could always make friends in the future, I was cold by nature - and I don''t mean just physically. I can''t express any emotions other than anger well; I can''t act cute and innocent like some noble girls; and by all means I hate having to converse with others unless it was necessary. So in other word, I wasn''t someone made to be surrounded by people, nor liked.

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    I slapped his hand away and hurried to put everything away. He poked my cheek, much to my annoyance.

    "Hey, hey, don''t be upset. I was just joking. You''re a kid, you have plenty of chances to make friends in the future."

    I made an effort to glare, but surprisingly I didn''t maintain it. It''s funny how I got angry at Shelly simply because she was going to stay here, yet I can''t find myself to stay angry with a trespasser. Really, was it because I reverted back to a child that my emotions are all over, or have I not grown enough?

    "You aren''t wrong though," I said honestly, getting off the chair. He followed me as I made way to the book shelves. He was silent for a bit before I felt his arms circle around me and his chin rest on the top of my head, "What do you think you''re doing?"

    "Sorry¡­" he murmured, "sorry."

    I huffed, feeling uncomfortable as I was being trapped by him. His words, however, did seem to cool down my irritation a little. It was strange.

    "You''re a weird one," I murmured back, reaching out and grabbing an unread book. He laughed, releasing me. I looked back at him in caution, wondering what he was planning to do next.

    He sat down on the carpeted floor and held his arms wide open, a huge grin on his face. I scrunched my eyebrows and shook my head.

    "No way."

    He pouted, "Pleaseee, this is what friends do."

    "While I may not have friends, I know well enough that friends of the opposite gender don''t do something like sitting on each other''s laps."

    "Come on! It''s not like I''m going to do anything to you. And I said it before, I''m your friend now. So don''t go saying something like you don''t have friends."

    I stared at him before extending my hand and whacking him on the head with the book I picked out.

    "Ow!" he cried out, clutching his head. I smiled slightly.

    Perhaps¡­

    Perhaps, trusting him could become a grave mistake later on¡­but it would be nice to have a friend for once. It didn''t mean I was going to spill all of my secrets to him though. He still had a long way before gaining my full trust. After all, I don''t even know his true identity, or how he managed to find me.

 11 7

    Night arrived. I made my way to the Shelly''s room. Taking a deep breath, I knocked on the door. She opened the door and looked at me in surprise. After my cold treatment, I''m not fazed at the fact that she was expecting me to knock on her door. However, I am well aware of the fact that she did not deserve to be treated in such a manner. Not only was she older than me, but was only carrying out her duty as a tutor.

    "Dinner is ready," I said.

    "Oh," she replied, "Uh, thank you for telling me. However, won''t my presence at the dinner table be¡­awkward?"

    "I don''t see any reason why. You are a guest here, as well my tutor. Therefore you have every right to join us."

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    She let out a sigh of relief at my reply and smiled. I turned away and showed her the way to the diner. Sitting quietly at the table was my mother who shot Shelly a suspicious and cold gaze before looking back down at her meal. At least she was out of her room. I sat down in the seat in front of my mother, Shelly next to me. There was a silent atmosphere as no one spoke. Setting down the spoon, my mother looked at me, and then to Shelly. Her lips were curled in an unimpressed manner, but I could see that she was debating to give the older girl next to me a chance.

    "I heard that you were from the Hums Kingdom," She said. I bit the corner of the mouth at her question.

    Shelly flinched, sweat forming on the top of her forehead. "Yes. My name is Shelly. It is nice to meet you, Ma''am."

    "And last name?" my mother pressed.

    "Pardon?"

    She raised an eyebrow, "Your last name, what is it?"

    "Oh! It''s Gales. My father is Duke Jose Gales."

    My mother picked up her fork and knife and spoke in an icy tone, "I never asked for your father''s name."

    Shelly nodded awkwardly. Her eyes shimmered with slight fear and sadness. It was understandable. Not only was she sent somewhere out of her country, but was unexpectedly met with the task to live in a manor made for a concubine and illegitimate child who both treated her with suspicion and coldness. Her expression was more than enough to tell me that she was not a spy for his majesty, nor was she a piece placed in the manor to cause tension.

    "Mother," I spoke up. My mother gave me a swift look, "I know, Ice. I''ve thought about everything."

    "And?" I urged her to continue speaking.

    "You''re right. Perhaps I''ve gone overboard with these feelings of mine. I''ll try not to be so¡­love-struck. However, that doesn''t mean I''m going to stop pushing you towards gaining a higher position. Only when you gain a higher and stable position will you be happy."

    A calm wave clashed towards me at her words. It was assuring that I at least mattered enough to her for her to realize her wrongs. In honesty, I had little to no faith that I could help her snap out of her delusional thoughts. I even readied myself to abandon her for my own sake, yet she proved to me that she was indeed a woman who wasn''t completely thoughtless. However, there was still much more to do before I could settle down and rest. For example, she still had the idea that I will only be happy with the throne- something I no longer crave for. Unlike my half siblings (two of which have yet to be born), I never saw the throne as a place to help build a better kingdom, it was merely what I believed to be the piece to gaining happiness and my father''s attention. However, now that I''m aware of happiness existing in the simple things, it would be of no use to me, just like how I no longer wish to be acknowledged by my father to prove my worth.

    Wiping my mouth, I excused myself from the dinner table.

    The weather was chilly. I crawled into my bed and peered up. My mind started to wonder as I thought about all that I went through. Life has certainly always been complicated, but this whole "traveling through time" situation is by far the most complicated. I never used to believe in God. Not until I lost everything I once cherished.

    It was during those times that I found comfort and peace in prayers. Not everyone will agree or find sense in my reasoning to pray to a being that is invisible to the naked eyes at a time when I lost all fortune, and that''s fine. But I believe I was saved, not physically, but emotionally by the beliefs. However, even if I was now a believer, it made no sense for me to be given such an grand opportunity. I didn''t deserve it. That was why the situation was complicated. furthermore, I had done studies at the academy at some point on the idea of reversing time before in my previous life. Even if it was a single fly that were to be sent back to the past, it was more than enough to change multiple events. Such a concept, I noticed, were already starting to happen. I was too different compared to the previous me. And whatever decisions made now could either save a life, or end it. However, even though I''m given such an opportunity, I am by no means a saint that will declare something like, "I shall prevent the war."

    I merely wish for a simply life this time around. Therefore, unless those that harmed me in last life decides to try and harm me again, I by no means will do anything as an act of revenge against them. It''s an itch that''s waiting to be scratched when I think about the idea of hurting those that have done wrong to me. But I know very well that around half of them were only against me due to my actions. I will live a more peaceful life. I need to live a more peaceful life.

 12 8

    After I finished wrapping the shawl around my small frame, I put on my gloves. Walking out the door, I greeted Opal, who stood waiting for me, with a tilted smile. Today was a day off so I requested for Draco to take me to town in order for me to check up on the weapon I requested from Philip.

    "Oh, are you two going somewhere?"

    Both Opal and I stopped walking and turned to face Shelly who looked at us with curiosity. I gave a bow as a sign of courtesy. "We''re heading to town." I paused, looked at her, and decided to ask, "Would you like to join us?"

    I wasn''t quite comfortable around her just yet, however she did prove herself to be a good teacher, and an overall good person. Even though I was already ackowledeble about everything that was to be taught for my age, she would throw in additional lessons none of my previous tutors and teachers would cover. And from time to time she would present Opal with sweets after lessons. As for me, she would recommend me good books to read, something I really appreciated.

    "Is that okay?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with excitement. I nodded, "Opal and I will go ahead to meet up with Draco. We''ll wait for you at the main gate."

    "Alright," she nodded excitedly, rushing away in joy. Shelly was a lot like a child at times; easily scared, and easily excited. Yet it seems understandable. Draco had informed me that he dug up some information about Shelly in order to ease my worry. From what he gathered, Shelly was the only daughter of Gales household, and had two older brothers. One of her brother was to succeed their father''s position, and the her other brother was to take over her mother''s family line as her mother was the only child and did not want to take over after her father, Shelly''s grandfather, retires. That being said, it seems like growing up her father never took notice of her, nor did her mother, as they were always busy with her brothers. She was rarely allowed to go outside or to gatherings and events, too. So, being the youngest and unfavored child, as well as a female, she only had two choices; get married, or find a career. Without hesitation she chose the latter. It was only when she gained success in her field that her parents began to praise her.

    She reminded me a lot of my old self; wanting the proper attention and affections of my parents.

    Getting off the carriage with the help of Draco, I waited for Opal and Shelly to get off to see what their plans were. I knew that Opal would most likely follow me. However, I wasn''t sure as to what Shelly wanted to do.

    "Do you have any place you want to visit?" I asked. She looked around the bustling town before peering back down at me with a smile, "I think I''ll just walk around for now."

    I nodded, "Very well. I have plans already so I can''t accompany you. But I say that we meet back here around lunch time."

    Saying all I needed, I parted ways with Shelly, who decided to look at the clothing shops first, and Draco, who left to catch up to an old friend. Opal walked alongside me to the familiar road of where we first met, and finally to my destination, Twin Moons. Like last time, it remained quiet and isolated compared to the popular Starlight''s.

    "Ah, Miss Juntasa!" a startled voice cried out. I gave a smile bow, "Phillip Crew," I greeted, "It''s been a while, and there''s no need to call me Miss. I am younger than you after all."

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    Philip scratched the back of his ear in a shy manner, "Even so, your status is higher than mine¡­"

    I understood where his discomfort came from, however, I would much rather prefer him to call me in a less formal way. I wasn''t going to push him to change it just yet though. Not when we barely knew each other.

    "Very well. Now then, have you completed the task?"

    He nodded eagerly, his lips tilted upward in a proud manner. He motioned for me to follow him into one of the rooms in the back. Walking in, a strong smell of metallic hit me. I found myself looking around in interest, as did Opal.

    As I was peering down at some untouched metals, Philip called out to me. I turned to face him and found him carrying the weapon I requested from him wrapped in black cloth.

    "This is the final product," he stated.

    I took hold of it and unwrapped the cloth that was covering it in a protective manner. As the last do the folds unraveled, I found myself taking in the beauty of the weapon. The blade was pitch black as a crystal blue line ran along the middle of it. On the handle, that was equally black, laid a ocean deep coloured gem. It was a simple design that didn''t stick out, and was the perfect size for my current self. Passing the cloth to Opal, I held the dagger with both hands and focused on the imagery. Frosty mist formed around the dagger and soon it became the size of a sword.

    Satisfied, I changed it back to a dagger and took back the cloth I handed to Opal to cover it up once more.

    "You''ve done a good job," I praised.

    "Thank you. I was quite worried that it wouldn''t meet your standard," he replied with a hint of shyness and worry.

    I shook my head, "Your craftsmanship is much better than that of Starlight''s. Too bad people don''t realize that."

    A sudden thought came to mind as I said that. I didn''t want to do something like causing Starlight to become bankrupt since they hadn''t done anything against me, but shedding light on Twin Moon''s would put that into a possibility, especially with how talented Philip was. Perhaps I could tell Draco and have him spread the words only to the most capable knights - ones who could swear to secrecy and wouldn''t immediately start spreading words about Twin Moons. Philip was too young and didn''t have enough support to be able to withstand the outstanding amount of orders he would receive once people found out about his potential.

    As I thought about how to help out Philip''s situation, a loud noise from the main part of the shop caught my attention. Looking at Philip whose eyes appeared to be wavering in a nervous manner. My eyes flashed cold as I walked out the room with the dagger neatly covered and hidden away.

    Two men stood, picking up weapons on display and dropping them on the floor. You would think they were bandits or criminals with their behaviors but the fact that one of them was neatly dressed in a butler''s clothing, and the other in high end clothing gave away their status.

    The one in expensive looking clothing held a mocking smirk as he laid eyes on Philip. His attitude caused my stomach to turn in irritation.

    As though he only just noticed me, his smirk faded, looking at me with pitiful eyes. I nearly scoffed.

    "Did you finally decide to prey on innocent nobles to make money?" he asked, eyes flashing towards Philip. I could sense Philip tense up.

    "I''d suggest you watch what you say," I warned, finally getting an understanding of who he was. It was no doubt he was the son of the current owner of Starlight''s. I had heard rumors about him a gentleman, and a man of honour as he was to take over his father ''legacy'' of being a talented blacksmith. However, rumors weren''t always to be trusted. Meeting him was more than enough to determine what kind of person he was.

    He didn''t seem offended by my tone, instead the pity in his eyes only increased, as though he was looking at a naive and foolish child. His lips tilted up in a smile that only made me nauseous. It was a smile I was all too familiar with, and was sick of. "I am only speaking the truth. By your attire, you are obviously from a noble family of high standing. It would be a pity if you were scammed of your money for a lousy weapon."

    I scoffed, my eyes glowing in a challenging manner. He was quick to recognize that my clothing were costly - I had decided to not change into commoner''s attire as I only planned to make a short visit - making him a suitable match for the gold digger, Margret.

    "I am more than capable of choosing which shop is worthy of my money. Now I suggest you apologize for being disrespectful to Philip, and for the weapons you threw to the ground."

    His smile faded, and I saw the butler standing behind him casting a worry look towards me. I raised an eyebrow. For him to react that way would mean that his master was one to cause trouble often - most likely only ever behind close doors though.

    "I have no need to apologize for speaking the truth," he insisted with utmost confidence, his lips pursing in an displeased manner.

    I internally sighed before turning away and handing Philip the bag of money, "Another set of hundred golds, like I promised. I need to discuss something with you so I would appreciate it if you stop by my manor tomorrow. Go the the antique store, Sun Burst''s, and request for Jiro Jugo. He''ll know the way to my manor. And close the store for the day."

    I didn''t want other people knowing the location of my manor, as it would raise question on my status. Jiro would be smart enough to understand the meaning behind my request.

 13 9

    "Stop right there," his voice commanded. I stopped in my track. Looking to my side and up, I was met with his piercing glare. "Don''t you think that you''re being too rude? I was kind enough to give you advice-"

    "Shut it," I snapped back, my old villainous ways resurfacing as the little tolerance I had towards him snapped. "You dare to call me rude? Last I checked, you were the one who walked into this shop, made a mess, and insulted the capabilities of Philip. So tell me, who is the one being rude here?"

    I could see his form shivering as I released mass amount of power, causing the room temperature to drop greatly. He looked down at me in slight panic, as though not expecting a child like me to be able to release such a sheer amount of power with ease. But as quick as the panic came, it was quickly replaced with resentment. His hand reached towards the sword on his hip. He extended his arm and held the blade against my throat. I could hear Philip and Opal suck in a breath from behind me.

    "What do you think you''re doing?" I asked, withdrawing my power as I calmed myself.

    "Teaching you a lesson," he answered. "I pity your parents for having such a misbehaving child like you."

    As angry as I was at his words, I held back and remained emotionless. "Go on," I taunted. "Kill me. See what happens to you, and to your shop." I knew very well that he was only using his sword to scare me into crying and begging for forgiveness. Someone like him knew very well that he couldn''t risk harming or killing someone out in the open, especially a child that is of a noble family. By doing so, he would only drag down his own reputation, as well as the reputation of his father and their shop.

    "You-" he sneered, drawing his sword even closer to my throat, to the point where I could feel the coldness of the blade.

    "Y-young master," the butler interrupted, "It''s best to stop with your actions, or else your father won''t be too happy."

    He looked back sharply at the butler, not liking the fact that his father was brought into the conversation. However, as much as he wanted to bring me to my knees, he knew that the words carried the truth. Reluctantly, he withdrew his sword and left the store. I scoffed and shook my head. Looking back, I saw that Philip was shaken by the event that just took place.

    "I''m okay," I assured his silent worries before picking up the weapons on the ground and placing them back up. Opal stepped in to help, and as soon as Philip overcame his shock, he hurried to help us put everything back in place.

    After saying goodbye to Philip, Opal and I walked around the town as we had time to spare. I enjoyed being able to walk around town without having to worry about whether or not a tomorrow will come. Nor did I have to worry about the gaze of resentful townspeople I had done wrong to. At some point, we stopped by an clothing shop where I picked out two new shawls for myself, and a new outfit for Opal. After we finished, we met up with the usual smiling Draco, and Shelly, who had loads of bags.

    As soon as we returned home to the manor, Shelly was soon hurried off to the palace when an messenger arrived and stated that the king wished to see her. I could only guess that she was going to be questioned about her whereabouts at the manor, and about how she was being treated by my mother and I.

    (Shelly''s POV)

    "Your report?" His majesty asked. I gulped as I stood in his presence. He was truly fit to be a king considering the fact that his presence alone brought shivers down my spine.

    "Yes," I replied. "While the studies are progressing smoothly, I''m losing materials to teach Lady Ice as she shows an incredible amount of intelligence, and already has majority of the knowledge. I''ve already passed the teachings meant for her age, and am now currently halfway through teaching topics meant for those in their first year of their academy. Within a month, I dare say, she''ll finish even the lessons of those in their final year."

    I looked up briefly, enough to see him raise an eyebrow, before looking back down at the palace floor. I felt sweat glide down my face, praying that I didn''t say anything wrong.

    "What about her behavior?"

    "She doesn''t portray her emotions, and appears to be cold majority of the times. However, she is very considerate towards those around her. There doesn''t appear to be any problems in terms of her behavior affecting her relationships. Though, I have witness her arguing with her mother. I''m not sure what it was specifically, but she appeared to have been lecturing her mother on the rights and wrong. Which is quite outstanding considering her age."

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    It was a lie that I didn''t understand what Ice and her mother were talking about. I did partially have an understanding that her mother wanted her to have a higher position. But I could tell that someone like her didn''t want the throne, therefore I chose to act oblivious.

    "Very well. Continue the teaching. We will discuss what you''re to teach her after she''s completed the lessons you''ve planned thus far another time. Also, I expect you to pass on the message that I wish to speak to her. Tomorrow, to be precise."

    I nodded, "Yes, your majesty."

 14 10

    I''d be lying if I said I wasn''t scared to stand in front of his majesty. Nowadays, whenever I saw him, I would reminded of my past self, and the way he had stared at with such intense hatred before I was exiled. I didn''t want to give someone reasons to hate me as much as he did back then. Of course, who knows how much he may already hate me.

    Giving a proper bow, and letting out the formal greeting towards him, I waited to hear what he had to say.

    "I''ve heard from your tutor that you''re moving along your studies at a great speed. Therefore, how would you like to move your studies to the castle after two months? Luna also happens to be in need of a study partner, so it would be beneficial to you both."

    I felt myself tense up greatly at his ''offer'', and wanted to reject it. But it was common knowledge for the citizens that even a simple ''offer'' from the ruler should not be rejected so easily, as it would be considered an act of humiliation. So, clenching my fist on my dress, I prepared the answer that would satisfy him. "It would be an honour to study alongside Princess Luna."

    It wasn''t as though I hated Luna. She was an amazing and kind individual who did not deserve the evil I committed against her in the past. And most defiantly, was she not an two-faced person like Margret. So studying alongside her was not my concern. I had also done so for a short period of time in my past life as well. Though, it wasn''t when I was five like I am now.

    However, it was the idea of being under the watch of those in the castle, especially under his majesty. I know his majesty can easily send spies or guards even when I''m out of the castle as well, but because I was a child he never wished for, there was no reason for him to watch over me when I was outside. And perhaps, I was being paranoid with the possibilities of him having people watch me. But as an illegitimate child, it was common for there to be concerns about what I may do to full-blood children like Luna, so I couldn''t stop being caution.

    "Very well. In two months, you shall be expected in the castle every second day, and fourth day," his majesty instructed.

    "I understand," I responded, gazing down at the floor. A silence embedded the air as I waited for him to dismiss me. Realizing that he did not have the intention to speak anytime soon, I let myself peek at him. My dark brown eyes was met with his blazing red ones. The very ones I used to wish would look down at me in fondness.

    Snapping out of my wondering mind, I cursed at myself silently for looking up at him. He probably felt disgusted to have met with my eyes. They were, after all, colored after my mothers''. Much like my hair and skin tone.

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    "You..." he started. I felt sweat build up, and my nerves go crazy at the anxiety of what he might say. I wasn''t a coward. No. I, Ice Juntasa, was nowhere near a coward. However, his majesty was an existence I could not afford to go against. Especially not now. With a single word, and my life could end. No one would want that, not when they were given a rare second chance.

    "You may go."

    I let out a small breath of relief, which I didn''t realize I was holding, at his answer. Not noticing the unusual expression on his face, I was quick to leave.

 15 11

    Kazu POV

    I was well aware of the fear that I drilled into people. It came with the price of being a king. And with the strict upbringing of the palace, however fearsome I was in the eyes of others, I had never let it bother me -until now, that is. As I watched the waning form of Ice Juntasa, my own flesh and blood, I felt a wall I built between us crumble. The way in which she flinched whenever I spoke, the way she avoided my eye contact, and the way she kept her head bowed even while speaking; they all made me highly uncomfortable. Having raised Luna within my grasp, I came to know the reason why people would beg for mercy when it came to children.

    They were young, innocent, and not knowing of the cruelty of the world. And having been kept in the manor up until now, Ice should''ve had more innocence than others. Yet, somehow she had developed a mindset that clearly indicated that she feared I would kill her at any slip ups.

    She was far too young to have a mature mindset - too young to fear death. Even Luna, who was older than her, did not know the cruel things I was capable of and was not worry for her end. And like Luna, Ice should be enjoying her days, not live in fear.

    A sigh escape as I pinched the space between my brows. While I never considered making Ice an official daughter of mine, for she had never been planned, immense guilt overcame me as I thought about how she might''ve felt growing up without my presence. Even if I didn''t like her mother, she was still a child that deserved a father figure; a father that should''ve been there for her birth, should''ve provided her with a name, and a father that should''ve treated her like a proper daughter.

    And perhaps if I had done so, she would not fear to be near me, and would look at me with a big smile on her face. At the thought of her smiling, I realized that since the moment I met her, she had not once showed any sign of happiness. It made me question if she was truly ever happy. Motioning my hand, my special guard appeared before my eyes.

    "I need you to visit the manor and update me on her lifestyle there. Specifically if she''s happy or not."

    He nodded before vanishing from the room, allowing the silence to return.

    Standing up, I made my way to Luna''s bedroom. As I opened the door, I was greeted by the sound of carefree laughter. Luna sat playing with her new tea set and dolls. The sun shone upon her hair, giving her a fiery appearance, strikingly similar to my own. Upon noticing me, she gave a large grin and ran towards me. I pulled her into a tight hug and placed a kiss on her forehead.

    "Having fun, dear?" I asked. She nodded, excitedly.

    "Yep! Are you here to play with me?"

    I pressed my lips into a tight line as I knelt down on my knees, "Actually I was here to ask you something?"

    She slumped her head to the side, looking at me with her large glowing eyes, "What is it?"

    "Am I a bad father?" I asked softly. Her lips parted before she cupped the side of my face, "Of course not. You''re the best!"

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    "Really?"

    "Yep! Why do you ask?"

    I shook my head, and forced a smile,"Nothing."

 16 12

    I looked at my mother who sat across from me, embroidering on an handkerchief. She had a serene smile placed upon her face, but I found myself feeling uneasy as I thought about the ways in which I could inform her of the order his majesty placed on me. Coco, who stood at the side, noticed the intense gaze I held towards my mother and walked over to my side. As she knelt down, she whispered, "Is everything okay, Milady?"

    I frowned, my brows furrowing, "Could you leave us alone for a bit?"

    Coco nodded before scurrying out the door. Noticing our exchange, my mother looked at me questioningly. I stood up and walked over to where she was before planting myself next to her. She remained quiet as I did so. It was strange facing my mother when she was in such a peaceful state. Even in my old life, the times she was ''happy'' or ''satisfied'', you could see madness in her eyes. But the madness I was so used to seeing was no longer visible at the moment. And I appreciated that. The only question now was, when is she going to snap again?

    Because while I pray it wouldn''t happen, the future was - is - always uncertain. And that, surprisingly, scared me. Especially when I thought about the ways in which I could die.

    "In two month I am to become the princess''s study partner," I said, staring at the table in front of us. Perhaps it was because I was so used to it, but I expected her to start rambling on about ways in which we could scheme to get rid of his majesty''s true family. However, she didn''t say anything. Curious, I look up at her, and found sweat gliding down her forehead. She dropped the handkerchief, as well as the needle onto the floor and clutched onto her head, groaning in pain.

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    I looked at her in alarm. Placing an hand on her arm, a hot spark shot through my gloved hand, making me hiss in pain and pull away from her.

    "Coco!" I yelled. The door slammed open as Coco rushed in, her face flushed with confusion and surprise. She hurried over to look over the state my mother was in before rushing out the door to get Draco and Becca. As soon as the other two were informed of what happened, Draco made his way to where we were and picked up my mother, who was now unconscious, before carrying her over to her room. Becca, on the other hand, rushed to the castle to ask for an royal doctor. I found myself feeling useless in this child body of mine while watching the adults try to help my mother.

    Twenty minutes later, I waited outside her room, waiting to for the doctor to come out and tell me what is was that caused my mother to collapse like that. Arms wrapped around me from behind and I sighed.

    "What are you doing here, Jiro?" I asked, not bothering to push away from his hold.

    "I came to inform you that the boy, Phillip, is in trouble and is currently waiting outside. But since you''re busy with your mother, I can handle the situation for you?"

    I shook my head, "That''s fine. I just suggest you leave before the adults come out."

    I felt a soft kiss be planted on the back of my head before the warmth that held onto me disappeared. I shook my head at his actions, and walked down the hall. It seems I wasn''t going to be given peace anytime soon.

 17 13

    Since I was young, I hated the feeling of helplessness and to show any form of weakness. But above all, I used to hate those weaker than me. So killing them had been my way of teaching them not to be so fragile ¡ª so below my level. Most often they were commoners, or lowly nobles that had their blood drawn by me. So death wasn''t something to frighten me.

    I was never truly innocent nor clean like my siblings, and I never will be. I''ll repent for my sins, like I should, but changing my character wasn''t, and isn''t, easy.

    Looking at the scene before me, I felt no anger nor true pity ¡ªonly the intent to study the situation and surroundings. In a sense, what played out was somewhat nostalgic. It was like seeing me in the eyes of others from when I was a true villain; a noble abusing their power and beating the weak ¡ªstomping and beating the them till they bled and cried for mercy.

    "Enough," I called out once I got an understanding of everything. Striding over, I crossed my arm and raised an eyebrow. "What do you think you''re doing in front of my manor?"

    A flash of recognition passed through the attacks eyes before he let out a smirk. He proceeded to turn his gaze away from me and kick Phillip who laid on the ground ¡ª bleeding and shivering as tears of pain streamed down his face ¡ªonce more.

    Letting out a satisfy laughter at Phillip''s cry of pain, he turned to face me once more, bending his knees in a mocking manner.

    "After your little stunt, I had my servants investigate you. Acting all high and mighty but it turns out," his smile faded, "you''re just a nobody."

    He raised once again, pinching the space between his brows as he let out a sigh, "Kids these days. They should really be taught better. Especially ones such as you who go around pretending to be someone they''re not."

    I clenched my jaw but let him continue.

    "I''m the heir of the renowned weaponry shop, Starlights. The son of the great blacksmith, Johnson Matthew Starlight ¡ª who is said to come from a great line of military power and to have mastered the ninety percent of mana control¡ª," he sent mocking grin my way, and used his index finger to jab at my forehead,"¡ªI am Ken Anthony Starlight. But you? you''re nothing but a shameful, little, ignorant brat. And to be honest, I did think about teaching you some manner as well, especially since the filth did help us track you down, but I pity you. So be thankful for my pity or else you''d be on the ground as well."

    I tightened my crossed arm, trying to prevent myself from killing. A bug like him wasn''t worth the trouble of getting my hand stained.

    "A nobody, you say? Perhaps it''s better for me to be that than to be you," I spat back. "You call me shameful but whose the one doing shameful acts right now? I''m not the one beating a child simply because they had their oversized ego beaten by one."

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    The anger in him raised but he failed to intimidate me with his presence. I glanced to the side and notice that Phillip was now sitting in a kneeling position, shaking his head for me not to go further. Of course I didn''t pay attention to it. I knew he was worried for me, but a bug like Ken wouldn''t be able to take me down in a million years.

    "And pity?" I continued, "I didn''t think it was in your vocabulary to understand such a word - not with your dead seedling of a brain. Oh, wait, perhaps you don''t understand what a brain is either."

    "You-" Ken growled, he lounged forward and sent a slap my way. I had the power to dodge, especially from such a slow attack, but allowed myself to meet the contact. The impact sent my small body tumbling to the ground. And in a second, a sword was held against Ken''s throat. I hid a smirk as I cupped the side of my face that was slapped. I slowly got up from the ground and looked at the shaking figure of Ken, held between the sword and body of a special knight.

    When I had been assessing earlier I remembered the fact that Luna''s bedroom wasn''t too far off from us. And as the precious child of the royal family and kingdom, she had several special knights guarding her. Out of the many, one of her special guard was bound to be close enough to the manor to react immediately to any malicious presence. And sending Ken into that direction of pure anger was easy enough.

 18 14

    "You-You," Ken stuttered, before he was forcibly put into silence when the sword drew closer to his neck.

    "Silent. Do you understand you just committed treason by raising your hand at a Ro-Noble child, Sir?" questioned the special knight. I didn''t miss the way he stumbled on his words and nearly claimed me as a child of royal blood. And for the first time, it didn''t irk me to not be referred to as a royal child. Noble, commoner, or royal, at this point none of that truly mattered. As the nuisance was held in a restraining position, I walked over to Phillip, "Are you alright?"

    He nodded meekly, trying to get up but hissing in pain instead. I sighed, and moved to lift him arm around my shoulder and helped him. "Let''s get you patched up," I said, turning to face the knight. "Can I trust you to send him away?" I asked.

    He arched his eyebrows, ignoring the sweating noble who cursed vile words, "Do you not want him to be punished?"

    "That''s too much trouble. Just send him away and everything will be fine. Good day, then."

    I could feel the intense gaze from the knight as I walked together with Phillip towards the gate of the manor. He was most likely curious as to why I hadn''t wish for the downfall of the trespasser, seeing as that would most likely be the route my mother would''ve taken. But I wasn''t my mother, nor the old Ice.

    Patching the last of Phillip''s wounds, I straightened my posture.

    "Thank you," he said. I nodded and took a seat on the chair next to his. "I should be the one thanking you for coming all the way here. Anyway, I''m sure you''re curious as to why I requested your presence."

    I noticed him tense up and I bit back a grin as I leaned against my hand. "Say, won''t you sign a contract with me?"

    His eyes widen. "A co-contract?" he stuttered. Contracts with noble''s were rare for those of common backgrounds. The last one had been twenty years ago when a girl born of commoner background was blessed with strong healing affinity, and signed a contact to become a holy maiden for the military.

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    "Are-are you sure?" he asked, his eyes shining with concern. I could understand his worries. The two of us are nothing more than children, I more so than him. And if by chance the public were to know, it''s be seen as nothing more than a silly child''s play, however it could also be a gamble on my image. Phillip had to understand, however, that I do not care so much for my image. They can call me a fool all they want, but my faith in Phillip''s abilities won''t waver. In a couple of years, Phillip will succeed - I''ll make sure of it - and I won''t be so much of the foolish one then.

    Of course by no means am I being selfless by doing this. My goal through this is to give him the support while I still have the money so when the time comes for me to leave, I''ll have backup funds.

    "I am fully confident this is what I want," I stated.

    He remained quiet, trying to process his train of thoughts. "What..." he began, "What is the full contract?"

    I grinned.

 19 15

    By the end of the conversation, the full contract was finalized. One) I am to pay him twenty gold per week until he is able to have stable funds of his own. Two) I am to advertise his works, however not to any dark organizations. Three) I am to give him full credits. It was crucial for blacksmiths to be given full credits as many have been scammed of their money by not having their names given - thus making it hard for them to receive commissions. In return for keeping my part of the deal, Phillip would be expected to keep my identity as his contractor a secret, and I would receive twenty percent of his making in the future.

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    He had tried to offer me more percentage, and strictly speaking, it would be better if I had more percentage. It would mean more stability once I left the royal life with, or without my mother. But with the limited time and skills I have, I do not need anymore. Thus, we agreed that in the future I would receive the benefits of having my weapons be made before any other ones, free of charge once enough funds flew in.

    And of course, among the deals of the contract, the most important one was; neither side shall betray the other. If by chance they do, they shall have their blood spilled in the most painful manner.

    Due to the previous encounter with the bug known as Ken, I summoned Opal and ordered her to send Phillip back and remain by his side until further notice. She was upset about it, and while I didn''t need to necessarily have her guard Phillip, it was better to be cautious - even towards those with pea-size brains.

    I walked towards my mother''s room and found the door wide open. I walked in and found a healer holding their hands out as they had a magic circle summoned onto of my pale mother. Upon noticing my presence, Coco picked me up and patted my back softly as we awaited for the healer to finish the examination.

    The healer retracted the magic circle and let out a tired sigh, wiping the sweat from his forehead. I frowned deeply when he turned to face us. Adam, I remembered. Adam Sinclair. He was one of the royal healer in charge of keeping those of the royal bloodline''s healthy. More specifically, he was in charge of my mother and I. But because he did not want to be involved in my schemes, I had him killed off by blaming him for a future man-made epidemic that killed off two thousand citizens. When in reality it was his brother that had made the creation, and he was the genius who found the cure for it.

    I felt my heart feel heavy.

    "How is she?" Becca, who stood on the other side of my mother''s bed, asked. Sir Sinclair smiled softly, "She simply over asserted herself. The proper rest and medication should be enough. On the other hand, I''ve found traces of an unknown magic that does not belong to her. I can''t seem to pinpoint exactly what it''s doing to her, or where it came from, but as it isn''t damaging her in anyway, it should be fine."

    Again, I noticed. In my last life I had heard the same, exact words from him. And he was right. Whatever magic existed in her didn''t cause any damage, and her death was her own fault. Yet the gnawing feeling eating away at me didn''t go away. Many questions flew across my mind as to what it could be, and why it was inside of my mother; living silently and without the slightest movement.

    As Draco escorted out the healer whom I''ve once wronged, Coco carried me back to my room. And in the body of the child me, I felt my eyes get drowsy before sleep consumed me.

 20 16

    "When the rain falls, I''ll be by your side. When you feel the abyss of lonliness, I''ll hold you tight," I read aloud, my voice echoing through the emptiness of my room. A firefly''s Lullaby ¡ªa beautifully written novel by the mysterious writer who went by the name of, Casper. Despite the fame and fortune that fell within Casper''s grasp, never once did they ever reveal themselves. And I admire that. I admire the way they chose to stick to who they were as an individual. But before I admire them as an individual, it was the works they wrote that captivated me; what pulled me through during my secluded and lonely life.

    A firefly''s Lullaby was about star crossed lovers ¡ªa well mannered princess, and a lonely black Smith. When it was first published, the stories of star crossed lovers were at the highest peak in popularity for those that loved literature. To me, however, I was captivated by the concept of lonliness and the pure humane side of both protagonists. They weren''t immediately in love with one another to the point where they chose to leave everything they knew to be with one another.

    The two had countless encounters throughout their time growing up. At some point they almost considered one another as friends, before the reality of their statuses broke them apart. The country they resided in had several economic problems, as well as treaty problems. Eventually a war took place when the king found out several of his people betrayed the kingdom, and out of anger, declared war. She, a princess, was held within the gates of the castle, while he, a commoner, was drafted. The two went without seeing one another for five years and by the time they met again, they were traumatized by the war that had taken place.

    And from there, they fell for one another ¡ª they fell for the warmth and similarity they shared. But he was a mere black Smith, and she was a princess betrothed to another. In the end, she was married off for the sake of prosperity, and he fell ill from a plague. Both never truly living a fulfilling life. Just like me.

    Even now I''m not satisfied by the progress of my actions. My mother was still unstable and the future I held was as bleak as could be. I hadn''t realized leaving the royal family would prove to be such an obstacle. His majesty despised both my mother and I, so he could easily kick us out if he wanted. Or so I thought. The more in depth I think of it, the more complicated the situation becomes.

    I had plotted many scenarios; including speaking to His Majesty about exiling my mother and I. However, it would only make my mother go crazy and blackmail him with slander into keeping us. After all, as a king, he needed to keep the image of being a perfect ruler. And I know for sure my mother would use the fact that I was nothing more than a ''innocent'' child to keep me from being exiled, as well. Those of lower status would surely start savage rumours were their beloved king to suddenly exile a child who has done no wrong. Even if I were to fall into the path of scheming evil plots, it would only be backed up with the fact that, once again, I am only a child. And children were quick to learn from their mistakes. They simply need to be taught.

    Therefore I can only single down such plans to one; the most complicated of all - curing my mother. If by chance she is indeed acting in such a possessive and vile manner due to whatever is residing inside her body, then leaving once I remove it should make leaving easier. And if she isn''t acting because of it, then I will have no other choice, but to forcibly erase her memories and flee the kingdom with her while she remains hazy of everything. Or I could follow through the one of the first plan, one of the cruel ones, and abandon any chance of helping her and leave on my own. It would certainly be easier to leave and hide by myself considering my knowledge of the kingdoms and magic. I could do it now. But the foolish me is wishing that for once, I have a mother. One who loves me as a daughter and not a pawn.

    I put away the book, as well as the many negative thoughts that were sprouting to eat away at me once more, and made my way to the library. Before finding a cure, I must at least find out exactly what that little magic is; and why the hell it was in the body of my mother.