--Excerpt from The Andre Sagenob Seeker of Knowledge Book on Monsters.


    Step one:


    We join The Church of The Ancient One under false identities. Then we wait for our chance to seek The Ancient One and witness him in His godlike glory.


    merge with this great being. Seeker wasn''t sure he, or his brother, had the courage to throw themselves into The Ancient One''s mouth. Though the Gods knew neither of them had anything holding them back. No wives, children or surviving family members, and very little money.


    Step two:


    We give The Ancient One our humble offering.


    THIS IS THE ANCIENT ONE. A CREATURE SO POWERFUL NO HUMAN OR HUMANS ARE WORTHY TO FACE HIM IN COMBAT. SO HE WAITS FOR A WORTHY ADVERSARY, EVEN IF HE SHOULD WAIT TEN THOUSAND YEARS.


    The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.


    Step three:


    We run like hell.


    Seeker''s portal created a dimensional vortex that took them miles from where they''d been at the top of the mountain. Healer and Seeker then went through a second portal, bending space and time again, taking them fifty miles from the first.


    They waited. Seeker/Gabe''s memory slowly returned. “Cover your eyes,” he said. For long seconds, nothing happened. Then a blinding flash lit the sky. Seconds later, a thundering boom knocked them off their feet. The boom was followed by a wave of heat and the horrible scream of a wounded dragon.


    “You wanted my best, brother? This is my best.” Seeker got up and jumped up and down for joy. “BG and her fucking dragon can suck it!” he shouted.


    YOU HELPED KILL THE ANCIENT ONE! YOU ARE KING! KING OF HUMANS!


    THOUGH I''M SURE ANY NORMAL HUMAN COULD HAVE KILLED THIS GODLIKE BEING IF THEY''D FELT LIKE IT. YOU AND YOUR BROTHER DID SO. YOUR REWARD IS 520 MILLION CREDITS AND UNLIMITED STAT POINTS.


    YOU HAVE RECEIVED A SUIT OF ARMOR MADE FROM THE ANCIENT ONE''S SKIN. THERE IS NO FINER ARMOR IN THE UNIVERSE. AND YOU HAVE....


    The list was a long one.


    “I received 620 million credits, unlimited stat points, one suit of armor, one psychic amplifying helm, and one wish,” said Healer.


    One Wish. Anything within BG''s power. 1,000,000,000 credits.


    “I remember what you said,” Seeker continued. “''Making a billion credits could take a while''. I pointed out monsters also drop valuable items.”