Chapter 80


    * * *


    Is that so.


    There was a voice in the dark. Even if she tried to get used to this sensation, she never could. The disintegration of awareness, the muddling sensation of confusion. No matter who it was, they would feel how this tiredness slowly inched closer to the feeling of death itself.


    In a space where even ones awareness had copsed, where everything was blurred, the first thing that came to her mind was just how tired she was.


    Ah, Im so tired.


    If only I can stay like this, if only I dont open my eyes again. But again, light woulde, and I would open my eyes. I cant breathe. Who is it this time.


    Please, just leave me alone.


    That inscrutable voice. Whos strangling me? Im confused. The smell of medicine, the smell of gunpowder, and the smell of perfume. It hurts. My head is spinning. Im lying down and my eyes are closed, but Im so dizzy. In this cold, dark space, the first to disintegrate was ones mind.


    As expected to be the case.


    A cold hand touched my forehead. A chill was left upon my brow. It must be a human beings hand, but it was so cold. Fathers hands were warm. But they must be cold now. Him, my father, a man who became a corpsein search of love, he left. Really, Mother, youre so enviable. After all that, Mother found love, and perhaps Mothers mother


    As for tonights appointment, its better to go alone, so


    Rest, he said? In the meantime, Carynne felt her consciousness clearing up at the mention of a broken appointment. Was she allowed to continue sleeping?


    Her fever has gone down.


    She heard a familiar voice right above her head. The owner of that voice had been avoiding her for a while now, but here you are, finally dragged out. Youre a fief lord now, but youre still a doctor. Thats why youre a lost cause.


    Thank you for your hard work.


    Then, the sound of a door closing.


    Ah.


    So thats what it was.


    She ended up copsing. She was working in Ises room, then thest thing she could remember was the floor getting closer and closer. And, the reason as to why that happened was clear to her as well.


    I-If youvee to your senses then just g-get up already.


    Carynne stared at Ise, who was on the bed next to hers. Carynnes room wasnt equipped with the proper medical resources for her treatment, so now she was lying next to Ise.


    She caught sight of her own arm, where a needle that was the same as Ises was embedded. However, the IV fluid was different. See, Carynne was awake, and Ise was still asleep.


    Carynne raised her arm and waved it at Dun.


    We both know why I fainted.


    As soon as she jabbed that needle into her arm, she immediately felt her vision start spinning. She had used thest of her remaining strength to soften her fall.


    Now she was certain. Dun was the one who brought Ise out of that burning mansion, but he was also the one who was keeping her unconscious.


    Whatll you do if Mister Verdic finds out?


    With a forced smile on her lips, Carynne looked up at Dun. Just hearing that she had spent his money on gambling like that was enough reason for Verdic to whip and tear her skin to shreds.


    What would Verdic do the moment hed find out that Dun, who he had been relying on until now, was the one who put his daughter in that state to begin with?


    Carynne had no doubt that hed pick up that axe again.


    Dun kept his mouth shut as he nced down at Carynne. Then, he answered.


    W-W-Well see each other again next year, o-of course.


    The answer wasnt what she thought shed hear. Carynne had been clutching the nket on top of her until then, but it soon slipped out of her loosened grasp. That answer was something she never would have expected.


    All too naturally, he answered in a way that acknowledged her repeated returns. His words did not hold his sense of responsibility as a priest and as a doctor. Even Carynnes father had shown his doubts until the bitter end.


    As though he had not a single shred of doubt about this, the apparent certainty seen on Duns countenance made Carynne speechless. How could he believe it so entirely? What should she do now?


    She was taken aback by the answer that was much too calm. However, her anger red quietly within. Putting her all into smiling at the man, she opened her lips.


    Oh my. Now thats astonishing.


    Should she go ahead and strangle Dun? Contemting, Carynne eyed Duns long, slender neck. When their eyes met, Dun tucked his neck as he cowered.


    Carynne pointed at Ise and asked.


    Why are you keeping Miss Ise unconscious?


    You, you tried to kikill her.


    Yeah.


    T-This woman did n-nothing wrong. She, doesnt deserve to d-die.


    Carynnes eyes went wide. His answer was strange.


    Do you love Miss Ise? Mmh, no, that doesnt sound right. Fine. Miss Ise is innocent. But she has to die. Mm First, she believes that Imitted murder And her shoulder, I pricked it. Once she wakes up, shes going to kill me. Thats why I wanted to kill her.


    Hearing Carynnes response, Dun stammered back a reply.


    I-I know. Thats why I kept her unconscious. L-Leave her alone. Right now, this woman h-has left the ststage.


    As Dun nced coldly down at Ise, it was difficult to assume that it was the gaze of either a saint or a man in love. Nevertheless, Dun made it sound like he had been keeping Ise asleep just to protect her from Carynne. Even if hed be in danger of getting killed by Verdic. The dubious good deed disgusted Carynne.


    Noticing the look in Carynnes eyes, Dun spoke.


    Y-You dont need to know the story.


    Y-Youre going to start over anyway. I-Im just watching b-behind the scenes like this.


    Dun replied to Carynne like so. His words were contradictory. His deed right now was both good and evil at the same time. Supposedly for the sake of protecting Ise from Carynne, he made the gitose.


    However, he had no doubts about his actions. He just had this vague attitude of If you want me to, Ill do it. Or, Ill sort it out, but I wont be proactive about it.


    Like someone who wasnt on the stage, just someone in the audience. <i>You cant do this and that, but thats not allowed either, and that, too, cant be done. Oh, no, thats too far.</i> He had that kind of meddling attitude.


    Did he feel that this was an obligation of his as a priest? But if he truly, utterly believed it, maybe he wouldnt have gone only this far.


    Carynne looked at Ise. She took out the pair of scissors hidden beneath a pillow, and while staring at Dun, she pointed the scissors right at Ises pale neck.


    Then dont stop me from killing Miss Ise either. If you believeif you truly believe that Ive been repeating the same life, then my sins will mean nothing in the end. You cannot stop me.


    For those who have stolen, offermb.


    For those who havemitted adultery, offer three young cattle.


    For those who have assaulted another, offer a young mare.


    For those who have murdered, offer your own life to atone for your sins.


    The only price a murderer can offer is his own death.


    But what if the act of murder meant nothing? Carynne wondered about that. She was incapable of sinning. All of this was pure entertainment. Thats why she did all of that and felt no remorse at all. She had no regrets.


    So, Carynne asked Dun.


    Have I sinned?


    Dun shook his head.


    Then dont stop me.


    Yet still, Dun grabbed Carynnes arm. He still stopped her. Dun looked perplexed. However, the grip of his hand was strong.


    If you believe, you have no reason to stop me.


    B-But you dont have a reason to kill e-either.


    The reason is simple. Im bored. Alright, <i>you</i> die then.


    H-How?


    He answered unhesitatingly.


    And because of this, Carynne was sure now.


    Got you.


    Dun really believes.


    I-In what way, do you want to d-do it?


    It seemed as though Dun still hadnt realized what subtext his words carried.


    Let alone harbor love for her, Dun considered Ise to be insignificant, and yet he was not afraid to die in ce of her. Even if Carynne didnt feel like killing someone here, this much was certain. Dun believes. Very much so.


    It wasnt because Dun was a saint, and neither was it due to love. Its just that he was a man full of conviction.


    You. What do you know?


    Carynne clutched Duns arm. He tried to shake off her grip, but she held him firmly. You think you can get away?


    What do you <i>know?</i>