Chapter 140


    Im scared


    Verdic clearly had no intention of going back home until hed get to see that girls neck hanging on a rope.


    Ise nervously observed her fathers expression, then she eventually tried to bring up what shed been thinking all along.


    Father


    What, snapped Verdic as he was still ring at the spire.


    I-Im scared.


    Theres nothing for you to be scared of. Its all over now.


    Ise shook her head. The one shes afraid of was the man in front of her.


    But hes her father. She shouldnt be scared of him. There was something scarier than him.


    Father, I Did I see it correctly?


    Ise was not confident with her own memories.


    Did I Did I surely see those things?


    What are you thering on about now.


    Verdic raised his tone. Ise hesitated before she replied.


    I dont even remember the fire Surely, I Then Carynne with Lord Hare. I saw her in that room with her father. But I didnt see the exact moment she killed him.


    Verdic jabbed a finger into Ises shoulder and said,


    You had an injury. Didnt you say that it was Carynne who did that to you?


    Y-Yes, it was her.


    At this, Ise nodded vigorously.


    But that was the only thing she was sure of.


    As soon as she had woken up, she heard the news of her broken engagementthat Raymond Saytes was now betrothed to Carynne, not herself.


    So, with a frantically high-pitched voice, she recounted the events of that night.


    Carynne ran after her along a dark hallway, red hair flowing behind her. Endlessly, endlessly, the chase went on. She wasughing. The hallway was too dark. It wouldnt end.


    Surely that girl didnt


    Ise finally woke up from her nightmare. She hugged herself, hands on her trembling shoulders. Even after she had woken up already, fear had yet to leave her.


    A new fear instead dawned upon her.


    I didnt see with my own eyes that she killed What if I What if I saw it wrong?


    Things had grown out of proportion.


    At that courthouse, Raymond was staring at her, when those countless aristocrats had their full attention on her she felt utterly devastated.


    Did she really tell the truth and nothing but the truth?


    Really?


    Ise, Ise.


    Verdic took a step closer to his daughter. Then, he wrapped his arms around the girls quivering shoulders. Verdic gentlyforted her.


    Youre being much too kind-hearted to the point that its an illness.


    B-But, Father


    Her tremors would not stop. Ise had been under pressure to speak. She hated Carynne. She loathed the girl so much that she wanted to kill the girl for stealing away her fianc.


    And shes scared of Carynne. She wishedprayedthat the girl would disappear from this world.


    Im scared


    However,ing personally to the site of Carynnes imminent death, just waiting for her neck to be hanged This was another matter altogether.


    For her to wait here, twiddling her thumbs, toy her own eyes upon a real corpseits something she never thought of.


    I-Its still too much for me to handle, Father.


    This entire situation was too much. Ise felt that she was still too young for this. Things had gotten out of hand.


    Even so, Verdic remained adamant.


    Youre old enough to see your enemys corpse and check whether shes really dead. Youre already an adult.


    Ise could not stop trembling. Verdic continued speaking.


    Ise.


    Yes, Father.


    What are you so scared of? It is the truth that Carynne had killed before, just as much as it is the truth that she had hurt you. Take revenge for thatrip her flesh apart. After all, you are my daughter.


    Ise shook her head.


    What if I saw it wrong?


    Thats possible, yes.


    Verdic nodded. Ise was astounded. Its possible?


    He repeated it once more.


    Its possible that you might have seen it wrong, yes. Its not an easy feat for a teenage girl to kill her fully adult father.


    Had he taken this under consideration from the beginning? He already expected it?


    B-But If thats the case


    Enough.


    Verdic sternly replied.


    Does that change the fact that she caused <i>you</i> harm?


    I can forgive you, my daughter, for making mistakes. But I cannot ever allow anyone else to harm <i>us.</i>


    Father!


    Verdic was unyielding. But Ise had to say what she needed to say. In the pastno, even now. Her father had always been like this. But she had to say it.


    Because shes terrified.


    I, I Thest thing I saw before I fell unconscious was a man not a woman.


    Yes, its clear that it was Sir Raymond Saytes.


    Blue mes erupted in Verdics eyes.


    He didnt save youhe saved that red-haired wench. He must have left you there on purpose.


    <i>No, Father.</i>


    Ise knew thats not what happened. Even after everything, Raymond wouldnt abandon her there. Ise was certain that he wouldnt be able to do so.


    Raymond was the kind of knight whod walk up to his enemy and say, You paid the wrong price.


    I just dont know! What if What if Father, Im just asking <i>what if.</i>


    Ise gulped nervously. Shes horrendously anxious. Shes utterly terrified.


    What shes afraid of was not Carynne.


    What if Dun Roid was the man who strangled me?


    Ise was terrified of <i>that.</i>


    She vaguely recalled the voice of that man.


    I warned you. Dont pay attention to useless things.


    Wasnt it Dun who strangled her?


    T-Then.


    Ise was terrified of this doubt festering within her. And she was even more afraid because she couldnt get a read on that man.


    Raymond was rather easy to understand. Hes not happy with Ise because of Verdic. She knew that. She <i>already knew</i>.


    But with Dun If the one who had strangled her was that hunched, sickly pale priest


    Didnt this mean that he was the one who kept her unconscious and also willed her awake, all due to his own agenda?


    Why are you bringing up Dun Roid?


    Ise was terrified. Because she couldnt even form one single guess.


    Ise.


    Verdic embraced his daughters trembling shoulders. His hold on her was firm. And, at the same time, his hold on her was cruel.


    He gradually raised his hunched daughter and said,


    Do you think that Dun Roid, that priest, would have been able to manipte this father of yours?


    <i>Hup.</i>


    Ise was terrified because that man had been next to her father far too long. And she was terrified because that man was the one who tended to her all this time.


    By no means could that man possibly be a good man. So, she despised him.


    Ise, theres nothing for you to be scared of. Isnt it obvious what Dun is doing to Carynne inside that tower?


    One thought passed through Ises mind, that her fathers hands felt disgusting. If her mother was here in front of her, she wouldnt have chosen tofort her in this way. Any woman would not use this method for revenge.


    But this was what Verdic chose.


    You think Dun manipted me? Really?


    Verdic chuckled. Then, he looked at the spire.


    Now that youre awake, I dont need him.


    Id like to see him try.


    * * *


    Carynne stared at Dun, speechless. Its impossible to figure him out. Hes always been so maniptive.


    Just what are you talking about right now.


    Tell me.


    Its alreadye to this, but what kind of drivel are you spouting now!


    Carynne was furious.


    Are you kidding me? Why the hell are you saying such bullshit <i>now?</i> The truth Isnt it clear what the truth is? I repeat the same life over and over again. I thought I had fallen into a novel, but thats nothing but mere delusion. To put an end to these never-ending loops, I have to give birth to a child and pass on the curse to them. But its impossible for all this to end because Im barren. This is a fact that you, Dun, admitted to me before the trial.


    You speak of love to <i>me?</i> SHUT UP! Just why the hell are you doing this to me until now!


    But Dun kept looking down from above at Carynne. He did not waver.


    T-The wager is not over yet.


    Was there hope? Carynne stared at Dun. Was there a way for her to get an answer? Carynne mulled it over.


    Ah, I should have killed Dun at the start. No, I wouldnt be able to get an answer if I killed him first.


    Dun, Dun.


    What should I do with you?


    <i>Tak.</i>


    I love him.


    But she must answer first.


    Carynne replied, schooling her features into a serious expression.


    I love Sir Raymond. Youre a witness to it, too.


    You saw it. Look at how much he had given up for me after the few months that we were together. He sacrificed all that, only to be left with nothing. Even now He told me to wait no matter what until the end. He said that he would definitelye get me.


    Carynne dug through her thoughts.


    What else was there?


    There was nothing I could offer him in return, but he did all that for me. How could it <i>not</i> be love when he did that much?


    N-Not that man, Dun countered. Y-You. How do you feel?


    Carynne clutched her skirt tightly before answering.


    I love him back, of course. How can I not love a man whos wholly dedicated to his sacrifice to me


    But Dun did not answer.


    He got up. Carynne clung to him.


    Wait, wait. No. Dun. I love <i>you.</i> I was wrong. I dont love Sir Raymond. I love you, <i>you.</i> Help me.


    Duns face became distorted. Carynne took one look at that expression and decided to cut with the bullshit that wasnt even funny.


    Everythings wrong from the start so why. Why did she keep trying to find hope. Why was she so foolish.


    Fine, I get it.


    Carynne lowered her head.


    I dont have the ability to love. Maybe. Its just Whether the other persons good or bad, its just not right, so I have not loved.


    Carynne admitted it. No other man who loved her that much would ever show up. Her time was limited. And, not only in this life, but didnt she confirm it over and over before? How many times. Oh, how many times was it.


    Raymond never ended up hating Carynneit was like that, again this time. No matter what she did. Even if she had killed.


    So, she did not choose. Its for this reason that she took this whole world for granted. All this time, hadnt she been thinking that this was all just a novel?


    Raymond did his very best, always. To the point that she thought its fascinating to watch.


    Her knight. Her male lead.


    But I cannot love him.


    In just a little while, he would forget Carynne.


    Whats the point int doing that


    Yet again, the narrative would scatter. Time would rewind itself and bring her back to the beginning.


    None of those efforts, none of those affections, none of those duties, and none of that hatred.


    Everything would disappear. All of the rtionships she had built would copse.


    So, Carynne could not love.


    Never.


    Her time did not continue. In the end, no one would be able to understand her. No one would live this resetting life with her. She would be alone evermore.


    Love is something that happens between two human beings. It cant happen between a human and a fictional character. Ive been told that the notion that this world is a novel is false. But what? That changes nothing. No one can share this worldthis experiencewith me.


    From the very beginning, this wager between them was inapplicable.