57 Twenty years ago …


    Miriam ( Nanny )


    Twenty Years ago …


    The Moon Temple was quiet , save for the soft hum of the morning wind brushing through the


    windows .


    I was kneeling beside High Priestess Liora – Mother like we fondly called her , my hands sped in


    words .


    front of me in prayer , my heart beating in sync with the chants but there was no life in my I was scared .


    Scared that the secret I’d been trying to keep these past few days would finallye to light .


    The like only person I had managed to tell was my best friend Terra – she was a moon worshipper just


    me .


    The Moon Temple had been home to me before I said my first words .


    I was born a Sigma Wolf – a rare breed of Wolves dedicated to the service of the Moon Goddess .


    We are often called messengers of the Goddess herself and as such , must keep ourselves pure .


    I never knew my parents – because I was brought to the temple as soon as I was weaned and as per the culture here , every trace or means we could use to trace our origin is removed , that is done to make us fully dependent on the Moon Goddess and her service alone .


    We are not allowed to mate – because we are born without mates and if a Sigma wolf goes as far as getting mated , the penalty is death .


    I moved up the stages of the Worshipper faster than anyone has in the history of the temple .


    By the time I was 19 , I was already a ‘ Moon Devotee ‘ and was chosen by


    e Moon Goddess to be the next High Priestess .


    As a direct apprentice to the High Priestess , I was among the few chosen to learn the deeper mysteries of the Moon Goddess , I could perform healing rituals for packs , spiritual guidance to the Alpha and pack members , assist in ceremonial events , prepare sacred items and spaces for the rituals held by the High Priestes


    The list is long , but basically , I get to rece High Priestess Liora when she dies and everything was going well , I already epted the life of solitude , knowing


    that love , marriage and motherhood were forbidden .


    We were never taught about it and had little or no knowledge of what goes on between a man and a woman .


    That was well , until , I had fallen in love .


    He hade to the Golden Gates Pack as one of the entourage from the White Mountain Council , our eyes had met briefly across the hall when I had escorted Mother Liora to go greet the Lycan Leader .


    I’ve seen a lot of men – tall , handsome , ugly and they never affected me the way this man did .


    His gaze lingered on my face for a little while before moving to my body , making me flush with embarrassment and leaving me with a tingling between my legs .


    The second day , while I was taking healing potions to the visitor’s quarters – mostly to the Alphas to hain almenote their etranth after their inumane it was dark and the Night of the moon


    –


    16:00


    1/4


    57 Twenty years ago ….


    wasn’t as bright as it used to be .


    I had stumbled and was almost going to fall when strong hands .


    grabbed me .


    It was that Alpha from before .


    I remembered how his eyes had undressed me before his lips captured mine , so tenderly , that it made my knees weaken .


    Every evening , I would sneak to his room and let him touch me and please me , until one of the days , we couldn’t hold back our passion anymore …


    It was painful at first but beautiful , so beautiful that the mere thought of it , sends a sweet , burning sensation through me .


    I knew I had erred but strangely , I didn’t feel convicted .


    I still followed Mother Liora in rituals and every other thing.


    Butst month , I didn’t bleed .


    At first , I thought it was the stress , but it’s been three weeks since I was supposed to bleed and yet nothing hase .


    Scared , I had gone to the Alpha’s pack and told him what was happening to me .


    He snuck me to a healer who confirmed I was already 7 weeks pregnant.


    But that was not the only thing I discovered – this Alpha , the one I had fallen desperately in love with , had a Luna .


    His eyes had grown cold when he discovered I was with child and he had told me to my face to get rid of it , but I couldn’t .


    In that bound us Aside from the three oaths ( Do not kill , Do not lie and remain true to yourself ) together as Sigma wolves , I couldn’t bring myself to take a life .


    I just couldn’t .


    And now , kneeling beside Mother Liora , I was looking for the best way to break the news .


    Terra had insisted I run away because if they knew I had been with a man , death would be the penalty but I wanted an honourable death .


    I wanted to remain true to myself until the very end .


    I ced a hand on my stomach , now gently growing with life .


    The initiation ritual should have been my crowning achievement , my first step toward one day bing a High Priestess .


    But everything had changed in the blink of an eye .


    The temple bells rang , indicating the end of the morning devotion .


    I felt Mother Liora stir beside me ,ing out of her morning trance before rising gratefully to her feet.


    She noticed that I was still kneeling in front of the altar and came to where I was , tapping me gently .


    “ Miriam , ” she said softly , her voice filled with warmth .


    “ You’ve been quiet today – for some days now .


    Is something troubling you ? Are you anxious about the Initiation tests ? ”


    My throat tightened and I lowered my head , unable to meet her gaze .


    The weight of my failure pressing down on me , suffocating me .


    But I had to say it .


    I couldn’t hide the truth any longer .


    “ Mother ! ” I whispered , my voice trembling .


    “ There is … something I must confess .


    ”


    Her serene expression gave way to concern as she stopped bent down beside me , touching my forehead , her sharp blue eyes taking in my appearance .


    “ What is it , child ? ”


    I closed my eyes , my hands trembling as I clutched them together .


    The words stuck in my throat,


    57 Twenty years ago .


    “I – I’m pregnant .


    ”


    The silence that followed after the confession was deafening .


    The air in the temple seemed to be still as if the walls were holding their breath .


    Liora’s eyes widened , and for the first time in my memory , the High Priestess was speechless .


    The shock on her face was obvious .


    “ Pregnant ? ” she finally managed ; her brows arched in confusion .


    “ But how ? Is it even possible ? ” she closed her eyes , shaking her head as she slowly rose to her feet .


    I mean , of course , it’s possible , because you’re a woman but , When ? I’m sure no man is living in the temple and … maybe it was a mistake .


    There’s no way … ”


    “ It’s true , Mother ! ” I interrupted her softly .


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    “ It happened the day after my appointment as your direct apprentice .


    ”


    “ Miriam … what have you done ? ” Mother’s voice was barely above a whisper .


    “ Do you understand


    what this means ? ”


    Tears welled in my eyes as I tried to reach for her feet , but she took a step back .


    “ I’m sorry , ” I cried .


    I’m so , so sorry .


    I know I have betrayed my vows , betrayed the Moon Goddess


    herself .


    ”


    “ I had so much fate in you , Miriam , ” she shook her head , still staring at me with disbelief .


    You were one of my star students , Do you know how ted I was when I learnt that you had the Silver Mark and would rece me … Now you let a man desecrate you and for what ? For a few minutes of pleasure .


    Did all my teachings , all of my warnings … did they mean anything to you .


    ”


    “ I’m so sorry , ” I sobbed .


    “ It just … happened .


    I didn’t mean for it to .


    ”


    “ When you were actively , giving yourself to a man – you didn’t mean for it to happen ? ” she scoffed .


    “ Hou were on the path to greatness , Miriam , what do you expect me to tell those women ? ” she cried , running her hands through her hair .


    “ They’ll have your head , the council of Priestess are bitter women who keep strictly to thews .


    Is this your n ? To kill yourself ? ”


    “ No ! ” I shook my head , looking up at her .


    “ I let myself go , I forgot , all your teachings and … ”


    “ Stop talking ! ” Liora began to pace the temple , biting her index finger .


    “ Your tears would not solve anything .


    You think those women would take pity on you if you go to them crying like this .


    We need to find a way around this .


    They’ll kill you , Miriam … if they ever find out , they’ll have your head .


    Who is the man that … ” she paused , her cheeks turning red “ that deceived you .


    Who is he ? ”


    I shook my head .


    There’s no need to know his name , Mother.


    He won’t have me or the child


    and … ”


    “ What ! ” she shouted , her eyes growing wide with panic .


    “ You not only got yourself pregnant but you ended up with the wrong person ? What is wrong with you , Miriam ? Couldn’t you have found a better man ? Someone powerful ? ”


    “ I’m sorry ! ” I sobbed harder .


    It was all I could say .


    After a while , she came and lifted me from the ground .


    “ Stop crying , Miriam ! ” she said sharply .


    “ Tears doesn’t solve anything .


    Tell me , who else knows about this ? ”


    “ The Terra ! ” I hunned cleaning my face


    57 Twenty years ago …


    “ Terra , the red – haired girl .


    Can she be trusted ? ” she asked .


    I nodded .


    “ Fine ! You’ll carry on with your duties and not tell a single soul about this .


    I’ll look for a way to get the bitter women to leave the Temple first so that the more empathetic priestesses can pass you judgment .


    Okay ?


    I nodded .


    “ I’ll ept whatever punishment the council decides .


    ”


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