After talking with Su Dingguo for a long time, I left his office and went back to the company.


    Back in the office, I began to write the application for joining the party.


    It''s very easy to write this thing. First, I searched some sample texts on the Internet, and then combined with my own work and thought to modify them.


    Soon finished, and then began to think about how to fill in the volunteer letter to join the party.


    At this time, Qiu Tong came in to guide me how to fill in.


    Fill in one by one. It''s past the off hours. It''s dark outside.


    "Shall we have dinner together?" I look at Qiutong.


    Qiu Tong nodded: "good -"


    we went to a nearby restaurant, ordered food and chatted while eating.


    "I just wanted to remind you to write an application for joining the party recently. I thought you would have to wait at least a year to join the party, but suddenly something good happened." Qiu Tong said.


    "I didn''t expect But I know what''s going on! " I eat and talk.


    "What''s the matter?"


    So I repeated what Guan Yunfei told me when they entered the meeting hall in the morning.


    After hearing this, Qiu Tong nodded: "I see Minister Guan, it''s drunk, not drunk In fact, he is beating to remind sun dongkai


    "Yes I nodded: "it seems that minister Guan is still very concerned about me."


    "No matter how his attitude towards you changes on the surface, you must be clear that he is very concerned about you!" Qiu Tong said.


    "Well..." I nodded: "just, I don''t understand why he should be so kind to me. I have no backstage or background. I have no relationship with him. Why is he so kind to me?"


    Qiu Tong smile: "he is good to you, because you are Yi Ke, not others!"


    "I''m Ike. What''s the matter?" I said.


    "You are Yike, you are unique Yike, what do you say?" Qiu Tong said.


    "I don''t understand what you mean!" I said.


    "Slowly you''ll understand!" Qiu Tong said: "you have to remember that in officialdom, there are people who treat you well. If it makes you feel strange, there must be reasons for this. There must be interests. There are real interests and long-term interests Minister Guan treats you well. First of all, he does it for himself, and second for you. Of course, the premise of doing it for himself is to support you


    "And this support can''t be too obvious. When it''s time to knock, it''s time to knock, especially in front of other people. Maybe it''s more powerful. Of course, you''ll understand that this knock is actually for people to see Of course, you also need to understand that minister Guan does not want you to be aware of his help now. "


    "Why?" I said.


    "Because he''s still observing you He''s not quite sure that you''re what he wants to cultivate Now you can only say that you have entered his reserve cadre pool at most, and you will not be the only one in his reserve cadre pool, and you will not get the final reuse Perhaps, in the end, only a small number of people will really enter his circle. "


    "In fact, I don''t want to enter his so-called reserve cadre pool or his circle. In doing so, he is actually forming cliques and cultivating his own cronies! Put one''s cronies next to sun dongkai! " I said.


    "Whether you like it or not, there are some things you can''t help, even if you don''t want to enter, but in the eyes of outsiders, you are unconsciously If a leader wants to use you, he doesn''t have to tell you face to face. As long as he sees your character clearly and makes good use of your way of doing things and being a person, unconsciously, you will become a tool for him to use. " Qiu Tong said: "this is the talent of some leaders and the strength of employing people."


    I said, "well, you say, does he also want to pull you into his circle?"


    Qiu Tong was silent for a long time and said, "maybe we are not willing to, but maybe we are conscious or not We all don''t want to be used by others. However, the characteristics of our work and life determine that we will be used unconsciously. This is determined by our character, which can''t be changed. "


    I am also silent. I admit what Qiu Tong said is reasonable. No one wants to be used. However, as long as you are seen through by others, you may be used unconsciously. When you are used by others, you have no consciousness, and even feel that you are doing just and moral things.


    I feel unconsciously that I and Qiutong are stepping into an unknown circle passively.


    Take a deep breath, I look at Qiutong: "Guan Yunfei is good to me for his own interests, but I know that you are good to me without any interests in it."


    Qiu Tong''s face was flushed and he said in a low voice, "I didn''t do you any good."


    "I know for myself whether you are good to me or not!" I said.


    Qiutong bowed his head and did not speak, with an uneasy look.


    "By the way, Haizhu is carrying out telemedicine. I heard Haifeng say that one of his friends had inquired about it." I said.Qiu Tong looked up at me, his face seemed to be a little nervous: "did Haifeng tell you who that person is?"


    I said: "no, I asked him. He was very impatient, so he didn''t tell me..."


    Qiutong sighed and nodded: "Oh..."


    I said: "maybe it''s really like your analysis that Haifeng''s unit is a foreign enterprise. There are many foreigners in the unit and deal with foreigners. Maybe Haifeng contacted foreign experts through this convenient condition."


    Qiu Tong laughed: "maybe, soon, Haizhu''s illness will be cured When you do, she will come back to you. "


    When he said this, Qiutong''s eyes were a little sour, and he had deep hope and gratification.


    I was aware of the contradiction and bitterness in Qiutong''s heart, as well as helplessness and hope.


    I couldn''t help sighing.


    "Most of the time, people are resentful, depressed, regretful and resentful because they just can''t let go. Can not put away from the people, can not put down the past, can not put down the lost things; can not put down a section of time, can not put down a period of memories; can not put down success or failure, can not put down honor or disgrace, can not put down everything that does not belong to their own. After years of rendering and the ups and downs of the sea of people, I finally know that it will be easy to put it down, it will be free, and who will be happy to let it go first. " Qiu Tong murmured.


    Looking at Qiutong''s perplexed look, I seem to see her inner tolerance and calm, but at the same time, there are also unreasonable tangles and disturbances.


    It seemed to me that she was trying to put something down. Just, I don''t know, she can completely put down, even if put down, she can really relaxed, free will release, can really get real happiness.


    All things in the world are contradictory, so are human beings. No one can get out of the law of contradiction.


    Think of a word, women should not be too strong, girls should not be too strong, otherwise no one will hurt.


    But who knows if a woman is not self-supporting, self-improvement or strong, who can give her warmth when she needs a shoulder?


    It seems that I finally understand that many times, women do not really want to be strong, they are forced to be strong. Whether, again strong girl heart always has a piece of injury?


    No pain doesn''t mean you haven''t been hurt.


    Or, if I understand, I should not only see her smile, but also see her tears in my heart.


    After a while, Qiu Tong looked up at me and laughed: "in fact, today, I should congratulate you. You are about to join the party In officialdom, joining the party and promoting cadres are all through-train. Now you basically have all the necessary conditions on your way forward, and the last basic obstacle has been removed The rest depends on what you do. "


    I wry smile, looking at Qiutong: "in fact, Qiutong, I think, we are not very suitable for mixed officialdom, I am not suitable, you are not suitable."


    "But fate has pushed us all to officialdom. This is fate!" Qiu Tong said: "originally, when I graduated from the newspaper office, I thought it was a place where scholars gathered and learned Unexpectedly, the officialdom struggle here is not inferior to that of other units, or even inferior to that In fact, I always think that you and I are the most suitable intellectuals, although you prefer business. "


    I said, "it is a tragedy for intellectuals to mix up in officialdom."


    Qiu Tong nodded and said, "there are many intellectuals in Chinese officialdom, such as our former chief editor It''s right and wrong to say that they are tragedies Generally speaking, the intellectuals in China''s Officialdom can be described in one sentence: confused and watchful, depressed and independent, retreating and enterprising! "


    I said, "how do you say that?"


    Qiu Tong said: "one of the greatest learning in officialdom is to stand in line. Choosing who to stand with is a test of officialdom, a judgment of official career and a kind of political wisdom. However, more often, it is a game of personality. On the one hand, there is justice, on the other hand, there is power, on the other hand, there is dignity, on the other hand, there is promotion.


    "Is it to maintain an independent personality or to be a grandson against one''s will? The intellectuals in officialdom often face such a painful choice. They are walking on thin ice and facing the abyss, careful not to become the victims of political struggle. "


    I watched Qiutong intently.


    Qiu Tong continued to say thoughtfully: "the experience of several chief editors of the group can also be regarded as a reflection, a miniature and a display of the living conditions of the current Chinese officialdom intellectuals. In my opinion, the Chinese officialdom intellectuals we mentioned should not be related to diploma and knowledge, but should be more focused on spirit and personality.


    "In Chinese officialdom, there are a group of officials who have independent personality, unique thought and independent behavior. On the one hand, they want to maintain their inner dignity, personal self and spiritual freedom. On the other hand, they also want to make a difference in politics and get promoted in their official career through various ways and channels. However, these two thoughts often produce contradictions, collisions and struggles in real life, which makes them miserable and depressed, anxious and uneasy, looking forward and resentful.


    "Therefore, Chinese officialdom intellectuals often adopt a kind of life attitude which is contemporaneous but not defiant, and a kind of wait-and-see action which is compliant but not submissive, and walk sideways between independent personality and cruel reality. Even so, it is difficult to have an end, but it is also difficult to have a good ending. "I said: "it still shows that it is a tragedy for intellectuals to mix up in officialdom Therefore, since we are all on the road of officialdom, we should not become tragic figures, we should not be so-called intellectuals. "


    After listening to me, Qiutong was silent for a long time, then sighed deeply.