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MillionNovel > journal teleport science something > trying to think of every way a human might donk up a situation is the most exhausting thing

trying to think of every way a human might donk up a situation is the most exhausting thing

    i got ant problems


    thank goodness


    something i can deal with without feeling like my guts are going to crawl up through my throat and explode out of my mouth and strangle me


    which is what i refer to as


    the human mood


    i mean i got human problems too


    i am going to rant the flip out about them


    but first


    ants


    so the suburban ants have stopped coming. which means. probably. they are prepping for antsiege.


    there are two big problems there


    first is that i don''t actually know where the suburban ant hive is


    second is that suburbland probably has humans as well as ants


    so combining those two problems you get one ultraproblem


    that is


    finding and destroying suburbland hive means more humans to come and bother me


    on the other hand


    if there are humans in that area and also ants


    i can probably assume that ants are eating humans over there


    so


    the thing is


    i feel bad about that


    i mean


    i don''t want ants to be eating humansUnlawfully taken from Royal Road, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.


    specifically not this little human right here


    but also in a general sense


    so


    so


    man why am i in this ridiculous position. why can''t people sort out their own problems. i do not feel protective about humans. do i? no. i just don''t want to feel bad about ants eating humans when maybe


    i could have done something


    to stop that happening


    could i maybe just cut out the part of my brain that is causing these badfeelings. is that a solution.


    haven''t had such a good track record with selfbrainmods though


    kind of wary of that whole area


    well for now let''s just think about some good stuff


    like how the tea room is finished and looking pretty good. if i do say so myself. i made a dimensional fold for hot water. hooked it to a little jug thing. infinite hot water jug. put some coffee and cocoa and hot chocolate in the room. and biscuits. lots of those. and of course a teapot of infinite tea. hooked it in to my hot tea dimension. cute little table. red and white tablecloth. chairs. mugs. plates. doilies. all very clearly labelled so no confusion. everything a tea room needs. also a bunch of pillows for entrance. tested out the portal on myself. works pretty good. kind of fun. got roboarm caught on pillows but that is not a problem a regular human would have to deal with. haven''t made any kind of sleep dart or stasis thing or whatever. did get the syncing time down to five seconds which is. better. but not. ideal.


    distraction protocols also in place. antcandy launchers. buzzer drone dispensers. all linked up to a nice big friendly button by the door with a label saying ''press this button when you want to leave''. thought about doing more explanation. but then i was like. no. make it as simple and straightforward as possible. these are humans you are dealing with here jin. so because of that i also put another smaller button on the other side of the door. that one is labelled ''do not press''. it''s hooked in to the same distraction protocol as the big button. there''s also a thing that gets unlocked by a hidden key and behind that there''s another thing that only opens once you complete a sliding panel puzzle. and then behind all that is a secret button. which is also hooked in to the same protocol as the other buttons. just covering my bases here. humans are. paradoxical. contrary. you always have to consider the possibility that any given human is. y''know. a complete idiot dick.


    also the door doesn''t open unless a button gets pressed


    i don''t want to throw around terms like foolproof


    because some fool is definitely going to donk this up


    but


    i feel like i''ve done all i can


    in this situation


    v nervous about using tea room teleportal on live target


    i''ve got a pouch full of little teleport anchors i can place or throw


    also emergency teleport anchor launcher on roboarm


    might do the multianchor thing


    just scatter them everywhere


    do multiple syncs in different patterns


    so that at least one can port the human to the tea room


    i mean that''s kind of brute force


    but


    i don''t know


    at least i have one mechanism in place to deal with human encounters


    and of course i have lots of things to deal with ants


    so here i go


    off to deal with ants


    and if i meet a human


    well


    there''s stuff i can do in that situation also


    good?
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